Asking guests to walk between ceremony and reception

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is multiple venues a Christian thing?
I’ve been to mostly Jewish weddings, and lots of them, and they’re always all in one place.

I went to one Christian wedding years ago where the ceremony was at a church and then we all had to go to some other place. I can’t remember how I got there. I was mostly stunned that I was wildly overdressed in a plain cocktail dress and that there was a cash bar.

Yes. Jewish people usually have their wedding in one place. Christian people usually have their wedding ceremony in one place, and their reception in another, traditionally.

However, the current 20 and 30-somethings are more often having their wedding in one place, as they are not really attending church, and their grandparents' (to whom the ceremony may or may not matter, depending if the grandparent/s regularly attend church or not; also depending if if the grandparent/s are looking to pass on their own personal religion of their own upbringing - if not, the ceremony is a non-issue) church is usually in a different part of the country, altogether. Instead of marrying at their grandparents' church, they just marry in one place, because there are plenty of places to accommodate that - places that actually have parking, that is. Parents who have kids' of marrying age really could not care less, from my experience, especially if they have converted or fallen off of religion, along the way.

But then, I don't know of anyone who has wedding ceremonies or receptions where there is not enough parking, because that is just ridiculous. Right OP?

Do churches not have reception halls and kitchens?
The majority of the Jewish weddings I’ve attended have been at hotels but many have been at synagogues and they can have a large, elegant reception there.
I can’t imagine expecting my guests to travel to a different venue.
In fact, at many Jewish weddings, there is a significant break between the ceremony and the reception because that is when photos are taken. This actually would enable guests to travel to another location but it’s just not done. Usually there’s an interim cocktail reception with live music to keep the guests fed and entertained while the family and wedding party are doing photos.

I know my church (when I married 25 years ago) did not . Even it did, they held 3 weddings each Saturday, 2 hours apart. So unless I could get my reception over and done with in 30 minutes or less, our guests would have had to move their cars from the parking lot anyway.

My current church has a large room that resembles a school cafeteria. They sell coffee and donuts there after Sunday services, and people stand around and socialize. I guess it's possible some couples hold a reception there, but I've never heard of them doing so-and definitely not where I would want a reception.

One of my best friends from high school is Mormon, so she married in a Mormon Temple--only worthy Mormons are allowed to attend ceremonies in the temple, so many of her guests did not attend the marriage ceremony, but did attend the reception. Obviously she had a separate venue for her reception too.

That’s really weird.

Coffee and donuts after Sunday service is "really weird?" It's pretty standard.

I think PP meant the selling part, which I also find pretty weird. No selling during coffee hour at my church.

To bring things back (somewhat) on topic, I’ve been to my share of church hall receptions in the past, but they seem to have fallen out of favor.

Some churches might give it away for free, others sell. My current church has over 4,000 registered families- I can't imagine how much it would cost to give each member a free donut every week. When churches sell the donuts, the funds usually go to some type of ministry/dedicated cause-such as the youth group selling donuts to fund a trip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in the midst of planning a summer wedding. Our ceremony and reception are at different venues but the two are a ten minute walk from each other (five minute drive) and both in downtown DC. My usual instinct is that when a wedding has two venues, it's incumbent upon the hosts to provide transportation but I'm not sure if that's true here.
Would it be unreasonable to ask guests to walk from one venue to the next? Or otherwise make their own way?
I have not made my mind up either way so would love advice on balance cost (of transportation) and etiquette.

I've never been to a wedding that provided transportation to guests to a reception from the ceremony. Ever. And I don't think I've ever been to a wedding on the same premises as a ceremony. Maybe provide it to elderly or if you know someone has a health issue but the vast majority can figure it out.

Then you’ve only been to some cheap a** weddings. 🤔

+1

Exactly this. OP has to be a troll, or really has not been to as many weddings as she thinks.

OP, your best bet us to ask someone who has been both innand actually part of 30+ weddings, because you have been getting some terrible information.

No transportation = cheap ass.

First of all, you both are condescending, smug little pricks. "Cheap a-- weddings?" Well, aren't you a peach.

Second of all, I come from a large family, with many weddings, as well as have been in at LEAST 8 weddings as an adult (not including flower girls as a child). And I've attended dozens more as a guest. In only 1 was transportation provided and that was a trolley to the wedding party only. All weddings were at a religious houses (church or synagogue) and party offset at a variety of types of venues.

My husband - same on his side.

So the exception may be you.

I've been to well over a hundred weddings in my lifetime and not one has been at multiple venues.

NP: I truly don't understand this. Are you saying that you've been to 100 weddings and each wedding ceremony was held in the same location as the reception afterwards?! I have only been at a shared ceremony/reception wedding in just a few cases - like on a beach or in a restaurant - but 99% have been held at two different venues. I've been provided transportation from a hotel to a church and then to the reception, and I've been shuttled around as a member of the wedding party, but I've never once been provided transport just from the ceremony to the reception and back again.

Yes, they’ve always been in the same place. Always.
Generally a hotel, but I’ve also attended weddings at restaurants, clubs, museums and even a baseball stadium.

I’d find it very odd to be expected to go to a different venue.

You have never been to a church wedding?

No

Church weddings aren't really a thing anymore. Maybe 30+ years ago, but not now.

Lol to you maybe.

This whole thread is bonkers because it's people from different cultures not understanding one and other. This is 1000% a cultural thing.

I'm Episcopalian, my husband is Catholic. We both have large families and lots of weddings. They are always, always two locations. First church then venue, normally a country club.

We went to college in California, most of our friends are not religious. The weddings we go to for that group are all at one venue.

Personally I wouldn't think twice if I was asked to walk ten minutes. I also wouldn't be surprised if they provided transport.

Yeah it’s definitely cultural and clearly totally normal in some circles to have two venues while in others it’s unheard of.
I was at a Jewish event last night and brought up this thread. Everyone was as shocked as I was at the idea of a wedding at more than one venue.

[Anonymous]

Catholic weddings for the UMC always have two venues, because you aren’t allowed to get married anywhere than inside a consecrated church, but obviously most would not use that as their main venue. No transportation locally is absolutely the norm.

[Anonymous]

*anywhere OTHER than inside…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in the midst of planning a summer wedding. Our ceremony and reception are at different venues but the two are a ten minute walk from each other (five minute drive) and both in downtown DC. My usual instinct is that when a wedding has two venues, it's incumbent upon the hosts to provide transportation but I'm not sure if that's true here.
Would it be unreasonable to ask guests to walk from one venue to the next? Or otherwise make their own way?
I have not made my mind up either way so would love advice on balance cost (of transportation) and etiquette.

I've never been to a wedding that provided transportation to guests to a reception from the ceremony. Ever. And I don't think I've ever been to a wedding on the same premises as a ceremony. Maybe provide it to elderly or if you know someone has a health issue but the vast majority can figure it out.

Then you’ve only been to some cheap a** weddings. 🤔

+1

Exactly this. OP has to be a troll, or really has not been to as many weddings as she thinks.

OP, your best bet us to ask someone who has been both innand actually part of 30+ weddings, because you have been getting some terrible information.

No transportation = cheap ass.

First of all, you both are condescending, smug little pricks. "Cheap a-- weddings?" Well, aren't you a peach.

Second of all, I come from a large family, with many weddings, as well as have been in at LEAST 8 weddings as an adult (not including flower girls as a child). And I've attended dozens more as a guest. In only 1 was transportation provided and that was a trolley to the wedding party only. All weddings were at a religious houses (church or synagogue) and party offset at a variety of types of venues.

My husband - same on his side.

So the exception may be you.

I've been to well over a hundred weddings in my lifetime and not one has been at multiple venues.

NP: I truly don't understand this. Are you saying that you've been to 100 weddings and each wedding ceremony was held in the same location as the reception afterwards?! I have only been at a shared ceremony/reception wedding in just a few cases - like on a beach or in a restaurant - but 99% have been held at two different venues. I've been provided transportation from a hotel to a church and then to the reception, and I've been shuttled around as a member of the wedding party, but I've never once been provided transport just from the ceremony to the reception and back again.

Yes, they’ve always been in the same place. Always.
Generally a hotel, but I’ve also attended weddings at restaurants, clubs, museums and even a baseball stadium.

I’d find it very odd to be expected to go to a different venue.

You have never been to a church wedding?

No

Church weddings aren't really a thing anymore. Maybe 30+ years ago, but not now.

Lol to you maybe.

This whole thread is bonkers because it's people from different cultures not understanding one and other. This is 1000% a cultural thing.

I'm Episcopalian, my husband is Catholic. We both have large families and lots of weddings. They are always, always two locations. First church then venue, normally a country club.

We went to college in California, most of our friends are not religious. The weddings we go to for that group are all at one venue.

Personally I wouldn't think twice if I was asked to walk ten minutes. I also wouldn't be surprised if they provided transport.

Catholics are the most hard core of the group - meaning they are the ones that require the church wedding, no? It used to be both the bride and groom were required to be Catholic, and provided this is their first marriage, in order to marry in a Catholic church.

I don't think Episcopalians could care less, whether or not you have a church wedding, from my understanding. Episcopalians are far, far less strict than Catholics.

But yes, first church then venue for the reception. But that is not OP's question. OP is sounding like there is no parking at one or both places, but has yet to clarify. This would be important information to answer the question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in the midst of planning a summer wedding. Our ceremony and reception are at different venues but the two are a ten minute walk from each other (five minute drive) and both in downtown DC. My usual instinct is that when a wedding has two venues, it's incumbent upon the hosts to provide transportation but I'm not sure if that's true here.
Would it be unreasonable to ask guests to walk from one venue to the next? Or otherwise make their own way?
I have not made my mind up either way so would love advice on balance cost (of transportation) and etiquette.

I've never been to a wedding that provided transportation to guests to a reception from the ceremony. Ever. And I don't think I've ever been to a wedding on the same premises as a ceremony. Maybe provide it to elderly or if you know someone has a health issue but the vast majority can figure it out.

Then you’ve only been to some cheap a** weddings. 🤔

+1

Exactly this. OP has to be a troll, or really has not been to as many weddings as she thinks.

OP, your best bet us to ask someone who has been both innand actually part of 30+ weddings, because you have been getting some terrible information.

No transportation = cheap ass.

First of all, you both are condescending, smug little pricks. "Cheap a-- weddings?" Well, aren't you a peach.

Second of all, I come from a large family, with many weddings, as well as have been in at LEAST 8 weddings as an adult (not including flower girls as a child). And I've attended dozens more as a guest. In only 1 was transportation provided and that was a trolley to the wedding party only. All weddings were at a religious houses (church or synagogue) and party offset at a variety of types of venues.

My husband - same on his side.

So the exception may be you.

I've been to well over a hundred weddings in my lifetime and not one has been at multiple venues.

NP: I truly don't understand this. Are you saying that you've been to 100 weddings and each wedding ceremony was held in the same location as the reception afterwards?! I have only been at a shared ceremony/reception wedding in just a few cases - like on a beach or in a restaurant - but 99% have been held at two different venues. I've been provided transportation from a hotel to a church and then to the reception, and I've been shuttled around as a member of the wedding party, but I've never once been provided transport just from the ceremony to the reception and back again.

Yes, they’ve always been in the same place. Always.
Generally a hotel, but I’ve also attended weddings at restaurants, clubs, museums and even a baseball stadium.

I’d find it very odd to be expected to go to a different venue.

You have never been to a church wedding?

No

Church weddings aren't really a thing anymore. Maybe 30+ years ago, but not now.

Lol to you maybe.

This whole thread is bonkers because it's people from different cultures not understanding one and other. This is 1000% a cultural thing.

I'm Episcopalian, my husband is Catholic. We both have large families and lots of weddings. They are always, always two locations. First church then venue, normally a country club.

We went to college in California, most of our friends are not religious. The weddings we go to for that group are all at one venue.

Personally I wouldn't think twice if I was asked to walk ten minutes. I also wouldn't be surprised if they provided transport.

Catholics are the most hard core of the group - meaning they are the ones that require the church wedding, no? It used to be both the bride and groom were required to be Catholic, and provided this is their first marriage, in order to marry in a Catholic church.

I don't think Episcopalians could care less, whether or not you have a church wedding, from my understanding. Episcopalians are far, far less strict than Catholics.

But yes, first church then venue for the reception. But that is not OP's question. OP is sounding like there is no parking at one or both places, but has yet to clarify. This would be important information to answer the question.

I'm not talking about what is required, I'm taking about cultural norms. Everyone in my Episcopalian family gets married in a church, and then has a reception elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is multiple venues a Christian thing?
I’ve been to mostly Jewish weddings, and lots of them, and they’re always all in one place.

I went to one Christian wedding years ago where the ceremony was at a church and then we all had to go to some other place. I can’t remember how I got there. I was mostly stunned that I was wildly overdressed in a plain cocktail dress and that there was a cash bar.

Yes. Jewish people usually have their wedding in one place. Christian people usually have their wedding ceremony in one place, and their reception in another, traditionally.

However, the current 20 and 30-somethings are more often having their wedding in one place, as they are not really attending church, and their grandparents' (to whom the ceremony may or may not matter, depending if the grandparent/s regularly attend church or not; also depending if if the grandparent/s are looking to pass on their own personal religion of their own upbringing - if not, the ceremony is a non-issue) church is usually in a different part of the country, altogether. Instead of marrying at their grandparents' church, they just marry in one place, because there are plenty of places to accommodate that - places that actually have parking, that is. Parents who have kids' of marrying age really could not care less, from my experience, especially if they have converted or fallen off of religion, along the way.

But then, I don't know of anyone who has wedding ceremonies or receptions where there is not enough parking, because that is just ridiculous. Right OP?

Do churches not have reception halls and kitchens?
The majority of the Jewish weddings I’ve attended have been at hotels but many have been at synagogues and they can have a large, elegant reception there.
I can’t imagine expecting my guests to travel to a different venue.
In fact, at many Jewish weddings, there is a significant break between the ceremony and the reception because that is when photos are taken. This actually would enable guests to travel to another location but it’s just not done. Usually there’s an interim cocktail reception with live music to keep the guests fed and entertained while the family and wedding party are doing photos.

I know my church (when I married 25 years ago) did not . Even it did, they held 3 weddings each Saturday, 2 hours apart. So unless I could get my reception over and done with in 30 minutes or less, our guests would have had to move their cars from the parking lot anyway.

My current church has a large room that resembles a school cafeteria. They sell coffee and donuts there after Sunday services, and people stand around and socialize. I guess it's possible some couples hold a reception there, but I've never heard of them doing so-and definitely not where I would want a reception.

One of my best friends from high school is Mormon, so she married in a Mormon Temple--only worthy Mormons are allowed to attend ceremonies in the temple, so many of her guests did not attend the marriage ceremony, but did attend the reception. Obviously she had a separate venue for her reception too.

That’s really weird.

Coffee and donuts after Sunday service is "really weird?" It's pretty standard.

I think PP meant the selling part, which I also find pretty weird. No selling during coffee hour at my church.

To bring things back (somewhat) on topic, I’ve been to my share of church hall receptions in the past, but they seem to have fallen out of favor.

Some churches might give it away for free, others sell. My current church has over 4,000 registered families- I can't imagine how much it would cost to give each member a free donut every week. When churches sell the donuts, the funds usually go to some type of ministry/dedicated cause-such as the youth group selling donuts to fund a trip.

It’s like this at the churches i have been to. They aren’t selling donuts but you are asked to out a donation placed in the jar to benefit some charity or another. The charities and groups change week to week. The church isn’t pocketing the money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in the midst of planning a summer wedding. Our ceremony and reception are at different venues but the two are a ten minute walk from each other (five minute drive) and both in downtown DC. My usual instinct is that when a wedding has two venues, it's incumbent upon the hosts to provide transportation but I'm not sure if that's true here.
Would it be unreasonable to ask guests to walk from one venue to the next? Or otherwise make their own way?
I have not made my mind up either way so would love advice on balance cost (of transportation) and etiquette.

I've never been to a wedding that provided transportation to guests to a reception from the ceremony. Ever. And I don't think I've ever been to a wedding on the same premises as a ceremony. Maybe provide it to elderly or if you know someone has a health issue but the vast majority can figure it out.

Then you’ve only been to some cheap a** weddings. 🤔

+1

Exactly this. OP has to be a troll, or really has not been to as many weddings as she thinks.

OP, your best bet us to ask someone who has been both innand actually part of 30+ weddings, because you have been getting some terrible information.

No transportation = cheap ass.

First of all, you both are condescending, smug little pricks. "Cheap a-- weddings?" Well, aren't you a peach.

Second of all, I come from a large family, with many weddings, as well as have been in at LEAST 8 weddings as an adult (not including flower girls as a child). And I've attended dozens more as a guest. In only 1 was transportation provided and that was a trolley to the wedding party only. All weddings were at a religious houses (church or synagogue) and party offset at a variety of types of venues.

My husband - same on his side.

So the exception may be you.

I've been to well over a hundred weddings in my lifetime and not one has been at multiple venues.

NP: I truly don't understand this. Are you saying that you've been to 100 weddings and each wedding ceremony was held in the same location as the reception afterwards?! I have only been at a shared ceremony/reception wedding in just a few cases - like on a beach or in a restaurant - but 99% have been held at two different venues. I've been provided transportation from a hotel to a church and then to the reception, and I've been shuttled around as a member of the wedding party, but I've never once been provided transport just from the ceremony to the reception and back again.

Yes, they’ve always been in the same place. Always.
Generally a hotel, but I’ve also attended weddings at restaurants, clubs, museums and even a baseball stadium.

I’d find it very odd to be expected to go to a different venue.

You have never been to a church wedding?

No

Church weddings aren't really a thing anymore. Maybe 30+ years ago, but not now.

Lol to you maybe.

This whole thread is bonkers because it's people from different cultures not understanding one and other. This is 1000% a cultural thing.

I'm Episcopalian, my husband is Catholic. We both have large families and lots of weddings. They are always, always two locations. First church then venue, normally a country club.

We went to college in California, most of our friends are not religious. The weddings we go to for that group are all at one venue.

Personally I wouldn't think twice if I was asked to walk ten minutes. I also wouldn't be surprised if they provided transport.

Catholics are the most hard core of the group - meaning they are the ones that require the church wedding, no? It used to be both the bride and groom were required to be Catholic, and provided this is their first marriage, in order to marry in a Catholic church.

I don't think Episcopalians could care less, whether or not you have a church wedding, from my understanding. Episcopalians are far, far less strict than Catholics.

But yes, first church then venue for the reception. But that is not OP's question. OP is sounding like there is no parking at one or both places, but has yet to clarify. This would be important information to answer the question.

Mormons get married in a temple. I don't think it's "required" but it's something all Mormons I've known want. Both the bride and groom must be Mormon for a temple wedding, and only Mormons with a "temple recommend" have permission to go to the temple for the wedding--so if the couple has under age siblings, friends/family who aren't Mormon, etc. not everyone who will be at the reception, will be at the marriage ceremony.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is multiple venues a Christian thing?
I’ve been to mostly Jewish weddings, and lots of them, and they’re always all in one place.

I went to one Christian wedding years ago where the ceremony was at a church and then we all had to go to some other place. I can’t remember how I got there. I was mostly stunned that I was wildly overdressed in a plain cocktail dress and that there was a cash bar.

Yes. Jewish people usually have their wedding in one place. Christian people usually have their wedding ceremony in one place, and their reception in another, traditionally.

However, the current 20 and 30-somethings are more often having their wedding in one place, as they are not really attending church, and their grandparents' (to whom the ceremony may or may not matter, depending if the grandparent/s regularly attend church or not; also depending if if the grandparent/s are looking to pass on their own personal religion of their own upbringing - if not, the ceremony is a non-issue) church is usually in a different part of the country, altogether. Instead of marrying at their grandparents' church, they just marry in one place, because there are plenty of places to accommodate that - places that actually have parking, that is. Parents who have kids' of marrying age really could not care less, from my experience, especially if they have converted or fallen off of religion, along the way.

But then, I don't know of anyone who has wedding ceremonies or receptions where there is not enough parking, because that is just ridiculous. Right OP?

Do churches not have reception halls and kitchens?
The majority of the Jewish weddings I’ve attended have been at hotels but many have been at synagogues and they can have a large, elegant reception there.
I can’t imagine expecting my guests to travel to a different venue.
In fact, at many Jewish weddings, there is a significant break between the ceremony and the reception because that is when photos are taken. This actually would enable guests to travel to another location but it’s just not done. Usually there’s an interim cocktail reception with live music to keep the guests fed and entertained while the family and wedding party are doing photos.

I know my church (when I married 25 years ago) did not . Even it did, they held 3 weddings each Saturday, 2 hours apart. So unless I could get my reception over and done with in 30 minutes or less, our guests would have had to move their cars from the parking lot anyway.

My current church has a large room that resembles a school cafeteria. They sell coffee and donuts there after Sunday services, and people stand around and socialize. I guess it's possible some couples hold a reception there, but I've never heard of them doing so-and definitely not where I would want a reception.

One of my best friends from high school is Mormon, so she married in a Mormon Temple--only worthy Mormons are allowed to attend ceremonies in the temple, so many of her guests did not attend the marriage ceremony, but did attend the reception. Obviously she had a separate venue for her reception too.

That’s really weird.

Coffee and donuts after Sunday service is "really weird?" It's pretty standard.

I think PP meant the selling part, which I also find pretty weird. No selling during coffee hour at my church.

To bring things back (somewhat) on topic, I’ve been to my share of church hall receptions in the past, but they seem to have fallen out of favor.

Some churches might give it away for free, others sell. My current church has over 4,000 registered families- I can't imagine how much it would cost to give each member a free donut every week. When churches sell the donuts, the funds usually go to some type of ministry/dedicated cause-such as the youth group selling donuts to fund a trip.

It’s like this at the churches i have been to. They aren’t selling donuts but you are asked to out a donation placed in the jar to benefit some charity or another. The charities and groups change week to week. The church isn’t pocketing the money.

I feel as though pocketing money is the megachurch MO

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is why I like the ceremony and reception to be held in the same place. It avoids all this whining!

Not possible if you are getting married in a church.

Of course it’s possible. I’ve been to multiple weddings where the receptions were in church halls or church facilities— so there may have been a short walk from one building to another.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in the midst of planning a summer wedding. Our ceremony and reception are at different venues but the two are a ten minute walk from each other (five minute drive) and both in downtown DC. My usual instinct is that when a wedding has two venues, it's incumbent upon the hosts to provide transportation but I'm not sure if that's true here.
Would it be unreasonable to ask guests to walk from one venue to the next? Or otherwise make their own way?
I have not made my mind up either way so would love advice on balance cost (of transportation) and etiquette.

I've never been to a wedding that provided transportation to guests to a reception from the ceremony. Ever. And I don't think I've ever been to a wedding on the same premises as a ceremony. Maybe provide it to elderly or if you know someone has a health issue but the vast majority can figure it out.

I have been to weddings that provided transportation. I’ve also been to weddings in the same building or campus as the reception. Perhaps you’ve only been to suburban weddings — where everyone drives to get there? Providing transportation is pretty standard when the wedding takes place in a different location from the reception. It’s sometimes part of the RSVP to indicate if you’d like transportation. As many others have said: guests shouldn’t have to find and pay for parking at two different locations. Guests who didn’t drive and who may not use ride share services shouldn’t have to figure out transportation on their own.

When I think about all the costs associated with attending a wedding— adding a sweltering walk in the heat while clutching an umbrella and extra shoes wouldn’t thrill me. Unless this was someone I truly cared about, I’d probably send my regrets and a gift. Win-Win since that means fewer place settings at the reception, so they’ll even save a bit of cash.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is why I like the ceremony and reception to be held in the same place. It avoids all this whining!

Not possible if you are getting married in a church.

Of course it’s possible. I’ve been to multiple weddings where the receptions were in church halls or church facilities— so there may have been a short walk from one building to another.

My family is Southern Baptist. We all had weddings and receptions at the church. These were the cake and punch type receptions - no dancing or alcohol. The preacher’s granddaughter wanted dancing at her reception, so while her wedding was held at the church, she had an outdoor reception at her home. Everyone drove (she lived on a farm, so walking wasn’t feasible, but there was plenty of parking). Even in town, people usually drove. Things are spread out and there’s a driving culture.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is why I like the ceremony and reception to be held in the same place. It avoids all this whining!

Not possible if you are getting married in a church.

Of course it’s possible in some situations. I’ve been to multiple weddings where the receptions were in church halls or church facilities— so there may have been a short walk from one building to another.

FTFY. Not all churches have an area for a reception to occur. My church growing up did not.

And the ones that do have them, they are not always big enough. Or maybe the couple just wants a nicer venue. Which is fine too.

The point is, it is VERY common to not have ceremony/venue in one spot. And where I grew up, you went between the two in your own vehicle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in the midst of planning a summer wedding. Our ceremony and reception are at different venues but the two are a ten minute walk from each other (five minute drive) and both in downtown DC. My usual instinct is that when a wedding has two venues, it's incumbent upon the hosts to provide transportation but I'm not sure if that's true here.
Would it be unreasonable to ask guests to walk from one venue to the next? Or otherwise make their own way?
I have not made my mind up either way so would love advice on balance cost (of transportation) and etiquette.

I've never been to a wedding that provided transportation to guests to a reception from the ceremony. Ever. And I don't think I've ever been to a wedding on the same premises as a ceremony. Maybe provide it to elderly or if you know someone has a health issue but the vast majority can figure it out.

I have been to weddings that provided transportation. I’ve also been to weddings in the same building or campus as the reception. Perhaps you’ve only been to suburban weddings — where everyone drives to get there? Providing transportation is pretty standard when the wedding takes place in a different location from the reception. It’s sometimes part of the RSVP to indicate if you’d like transportation. As many others have said: guests shouldn’t have to find and pay for parking at two different locations. Guests who didn’t drive and who may not use ride share services shouldn’t have to figure out transportation on their own.

When I think about all the costs associated with attending a wedding— adding a sweltering walk in the heat while clutching an umbrella and extra shoes wouldn’t thrill me. Unless this was someone I truly cared about, I’d probably send my regrets and a gift. Win-Win since that means fewer place settings at the reception, so they’ll even save a bit of cash.

'
Again, it's maybe standard in your family or your circle, not everywhere. I've never had an invitation ask me about transportation in my 50 years. Not once.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been to dozens of wedding- was a MOH or bridesmaid in 9 weddings. In nearly every one, ceremony and venue were in different places. Maybe two or there used the parish hall or the ceremony was outside of a church. The only one that had transportation was my own. We hired a shuttle service.

Let people drive, Uber or figure it out or if you can afford it, hire a service.

You can provide helpful instructions in invitation.

Like I said before, no one wants to attend your wedding this badly.

Then don't. You won't be missed.