Anyone facing jealous friends now that your kids are in private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are a long term (10+ year) public school family that sends our kids to private high schools.

People get very, very weird about it (which makes sense). It eats at their own parenting insecurities---clearly our action of spending $50K for school implies that we (people they like and respect) thought public was not good enough for our kids.
Funny thing is that the insecurity definitely goes both ways (I sometimes regret not staying in public and there are many things about public that I miss).

So we don't talk about it. At all. Or only in the most generic ways. I never, ever say anything that could be conceived as bragging. I stick to all other kid issues: extracurriculars, sports, behavior challenges, friend issues, etc.
There is lots to talk about with ever delving into the school topic.
It works and we've maintained strong friendships.

Do your public school friends have a need to park there cars far away, so you can't see that they cost more than yours. Probably not, right? Then why should you have to worry about their insecurity about you choosing private school? You are placating their insecurity.

Usually the insecure one is the one who fears their kid(s) can’t hack it in the “big” public school so opt for the “small” private school and hand holding. Then they do the same for college, a small lib arts school.

DP here. We were going to switch our kids out of public. Our public has so many smart talented students. Besides the Big 3, I don’t think the DMV privates do much better than the top publics in terms of college admissions. We have confidence in our kids and they really didn’t want to switch so we decided to keep them in public.

The ones we are switching are usually the kids who are not the top students. Yes, 1 or 2 may switch to STA or NCS but the rest are usually the wealthier ones who weren’t the top. Of course there are the private school students who always were in private. The ones who switch from public are the ones who often didn’t do well socially or academically. I’m not saying they were struggling but they weren’t the ones who were at the top.

Exactly this. We switched from private to public. Bigger cohort of students. MUCH better math and science. Not too many private school students doing multivariable calculus or AP physics. Just a better education. Better life experiences. More opportunities to pursue their passions. And also better college outcomes.

This, of course, depends on the school district, I'm sure there are smart, well-adjusted kids going to STA and NCS. But generally, if you're lower county Montgomery it really is kids with higher needs or families that are particularly precious.

PP here. It really depends on where you live, how strong your local public is and what privates. DC is obvious that privates are better. In the suburbs, the privates aren’t necessarily better.

What are you prattling on about? We are zoned for Whitman and we and about half our neighbors use private. None have special needs. It’s a mix of all the schools from woods academy to sidwell. People made - gasp - decisions that work for their family. And I think many find the math and science to be a-ok at the privates. I wouldn’t worry about them anymore. It’s fine. You need to chill about what people around you are doing.

I just said we did this process. We ultimately decided to stick with our public. Our public has plenty of smart parents from Harvard, Yale, MIT, etc. DH and I both went to HYP.

[Anonymous]

I am 0% jealous of friends with kids in private schools. Waving at them from my international vacation that I can afford because I'm not spending $40k a year on school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are a long term (10+ year) public school family that sends our kids to private high schools.

People get very, very weird about it (which makes sense). It eats at their own parenting insecurities---clearly our action of spending $50K for school implies that we (people they like and respect) thought public was not good enough for our kids.
Funny thing is that the insecurity definitely goes both ways (I sometimes regret not staying in public and there are many things about public that I miss).

So we don't talk about it. At all. Or only in the most generic ways. I never, ever say anything that could be conceived as bragging. I stick to all other kid issues: extracurriculars, sports, behavior challenges, friend issues, etc.
There is lots to talk about with ever delving into the school topic.
It works and we've maintained strong friendships.

Do your public school friends have a need to park there cars far away, so you can't see that they cost more than yours. Probably not, right? Then why should you have to worry about their insecurity about you choosing private school? You are placating their insecurity.

Usually the insecure one is the one who fears their kid(s) can’t hack it in the “big” public school so opt for the “small” private school and hand holding. Then they do the same for college, a small lib arts school.

DP here. We were going to switch our kids out of public. Our public has so many smart talented students. Besides the Big 3, I don’t think the DMV privates do much better than the top publics in terms of college admissions. We have confidence in our kids and they really didn’t want to switch so we decided to keep them in public.

The ones we are switching are usually the kids who are not the top students. Yes, 1 or 2 may switch to STA or NCS but the rest are usually the wealthier ones who weren’t the top. Of course there are the private school students who always were in private. The ones who switch from public are the ones who often didn’t do well socially or academically. I’m not saying they were struggling but they weren’t the ones who were at the top.

Exactly this. We switched from private to public. Bigger cohort of students. MUCH better math and science. Not too many private school students doing multivariable calculus or AP physics. Just a better education. Better life experiences. More opportunities to pursue their passions. And also better college outcomes.

This, of course, depends on the school district, I'm sure there are smart, well-adjusted kids going to STA and NCS. But generally, if you're lower county Montgomery it really is kids with higher needs or families that are particularly precious.

PP here. It really depends on where you live, how strong your local public is and what privates. DC is obvious that privates are better. In the suburbs, the privates aren’t necessarily better.

What are you prattling on about? We are zoned for Whitman and we and about half our neighbors use private. None have special needs. It’s a mix of all the schools from woods academy to sidwell. People made - gasp - decisions that work for their family. And I think many find the math and science to be a-ok at the privates. I wouldn’t worry about them anymore. It’s fine. You need to chill about what people around you are doing.

Also, dude. You’re just flatly wrong. There are myriad opportunities starting at young ages to do fellowships, take international trips, study abroad, do internships, immersive languages, awards programs etc. at many of the privates like the cathedral schools. There are many opportunities to get way more involved in sports, to do intensive sports, to do interesting field trips, to do things like Shakespeare plays in fourth grade and intensive science and geography where I know for a fact MCPS is doing worksheets. You protest way too much. Nobody is going to say it to you in real life but yeah, like everything, you get what you pay for and many of us want our kids to have an exciting and memorable time in school. Sorry if that makes you feel insecure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are a long term (10+ year) public school family that sends our kids to private high schools.

People get very, very weird about it (which makes sense). It eats at their own parenting insecurities---clearly our action of spending $50K for school implies that we (people they like and respect) thought public was not good enough for our kids.
Funny thing is that the insecurity definitely goes both ways (I sometimes regret not staying in public and there are many things about public that I miss).

So we don't talk about it. At all. Or only in the most generic ways. I never, ever say anything that could be conceived as bragging. I stick to all other kid issues: extracurriculars, sports, behavior challenges, friend issues, etc.
There is lots to talk about with ever delving into the school topic.
It works and we've maintained strong friendships.

Do your public school friends have a need to park there cars far away, so you can't see that they cost more than yours. Probably not, right? Then why should you have to worry about their insecurity about you choosing private school? You are placating their insecurity.

Usually the insecure one is the one who fears their kid(s) can’t hack it in the “big” public school so opt for the “small” private school and hand holding. Then they do the same for college, a small lib arts school.

DP here. We were going to switch our kids out of public. Our public has so many smart talented students. Besides the Big 3, I don’t think the DMV privates do much better than the top publics in terms of college admissions. We have confidence in our kids and they really didn’t want to switch so we decided to keep them in public.

The ones we are switching are usually the kids who are not the top students. Yes, 1 or 2 may switch to STA or NCS but the rest are usually the wealthier ones who weren’t the top. Of course there are the private school students who always were in private. The ones who switch from public are the ones who often didn’t do well socially or academically. I’m not saying they were struggling but they weren’t the ones who were at the top.

Exactly this. We switched from private to public. Bigger cohort of students. MUCH better math and science. Not too many private school students doing multivariable calculus or AP physics. Just a better education. Better life experiences. More opportunities to pursue their passions. And also better college outcomes.

This, of course, depends on the school district, I'm sure there are smart, well-adjusted kids going to STA and NCS. But generally, if you're lower county Montgomery it really is kids with higher needs or families that are particularly precious.

PP here. It really depends on where you live, how strong your local public is and what privates. DC is obvious that privates are better. In the suburbs, the privates aren’t necessarily better.

What are you prattling on about? We are zoned for Whitman and we and about half our neighbors use private. None have special needs. It’s a mix of all the schools from woods academy to sidwell. People made - gasp - decisions that work for their family. And I think many find the math and science to be a-ok at the privates. I wouldn’t worry about them anymore. It’s fine. You need to chill about what people around you are doing.

I just said we did this process. We ultimately decided to stick with our public. Our public has plenty of smart parents from Harvard, Yale, MIT, etc. DH and I both went to HYP.

Oooo, so did we and countless other DMV-ers. WTF cares. I’m guessing you didn’t like your acceptances.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 0% jealous of friends with kids in private schools. Waving at them from my international vacation that I can afford because I'm not spending $40k a year on school.

Almost everyone I know from our private is also currently on an “international vacation”, so fancy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ever since my kids were recently admitted to private schools, many friends in my W cluster have been making snippy comments about me sending my kids to private school. Has anyone else faced a similar situation?

Those aren’t real friends

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are a long term (10+ year) public school family that sends our kids to private high schools.

People get very, very weird about it (which makes sense). It eats at their own parenting insecurities---clearly our action of spending $50K for school implies that we (people they like and respect) thought public was not good enough for our kids.
Funny thing is that the insecurity definitely goes both ways (I sometimes regret not staying in public and there are many things about public that I miss).

So we don't talk about it. At all. Or only in the most generic ways. I never, ever say anything that could be conceived as bragging. I stick to all other kid issues: extracurriculars, sports, behavior challenges, friend issues, etc.
There is lots to talk about with ever delving into the school topic.
It works and we've maintained strong friendships.

Do your public school friends have a need to park there cars far away, so you can't see that they cost more than yours. Probably not, right? Then why should you have to worry about their insecurity about you choosing private school? You are placating their insecurity.

Usually the insecure one is the one who fears their kid(s) can’t hack it in the “big” public school so opt for the “small” private school and hand holding. Then they do the same for college, a small lib arts school.

DP here. We were going to switch our kids out of public. Our public has so many smart talented students. Besides the Big 3, I don’t think the DMV privates do much better than the top publics in terms of college admissions. We have confidence in our kids and they really didn’t want to switch so we decided to keep them in public.

The ones we are switching are usually the kids who are not the top students. Yes, 1 or 2 may switch to STA or NCS but the rest are usually the wealthier ones who weren’t the top. Of course there are the private school students who always were in private. The ones who switch from public are the ones who often didn’t do well socially or academically. I’m not saying they were struggling but they weren’t the ones who were at the top.

Exactly this. We switched from private to public. Bigger cohort of students. MUCH better math and science. Not too many private school students doing multivariable calculus or AP physics. Just a better education. Better life experiences. More opportunities to pursue their passions. And also better college outcomes.

This, of course, depends on the school district, I'm sure there are smart, well-adjusted kids going to STA and NCS. But generally, if you're lower county Montgomery it really is kids with higher needs or families that are particularly precious.

PP here. It really depends on where you live, how strong your local public is and what privates. DC is obvious that privates are better. In the suburbs, the privates aren’t necessarily better.

What are you prattling on about? We are zoned for Whitman and we and about half our neighbors use private. None have special needs. It’s a mix of all the schools from woods academy to sidwell. People made - gasp - decisions that work for their family. And I think many find the math and science to be a-ok at the privates. I wouldn’t worry about them anymore. It’s fine. You need to chill about what people around you are doing.

I just said we did this process. We ultimately decided to stick with our public. Our public has plenty of smart parents from Harvard, Yale, MIT, etc. DH and I both went to HYP.

Oooo, so did we and countless other DMV-ers. WTF cares. I’m guessing you didn’t like your acceptances.

This thread is about public school families feeling jealous. I am just saying not all of us are jealous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are a long term (10+ year) public school family that sends our kids to private high schools.

People get very, very weird about it (which makes sense). It eats at their own parenting insecurities---clearly our action of spending $50K for school implies that we (people they like and respect) thought public was not good enough for our kids.
Funny thing is that the insecurity definitely goes both ways (I sometimes regret not staying in public and there are many things about public that I miss).

So we don't talk about it. At all. Or only in the most generic ways. I never, ever say anything that could be conceived as bragging. I stick to all other kid issues: extracurriculars, sports, behavior challenges, friend issues, etc.
There is lots to talk about with ever delving into the school topic.
It works and we've maintained strong friendships.

Do your public school friends have a need to park there cars far away, so you can't see that they cost more than yours. Probably not, right? Then why should you have to worry about their insecurity about you choosing private school? You are placating their insecurity.

Usually the insecure one is the one who fears their kid(s) can’t hack it in the “big” public school so opt for the “small” private school and hand holding. Then they do the same for college, a small lib arts school.

DP here. We were going to switch our kids out of public. Our public has so many smart talented students. Besides the Big 3, I don’t think the DMV privates do much better than the top publics in terms of college admissions. We have confidence in our kids and they really didn’t want to switch so we decided to keep them in public.

The ones we are switching are usually the kids who are not the top students. Yes, 1 or 2 may switch to STA or NCS but the rest are usually the wealthier ones who weren’t the top. Of course there are the private school students who always were in private. The ones who switch from public are the ones who often didn’t do well socially or academically. I’m not saying they were struggling but they weren’t the ones who were at the top.

Exactly this. We switched from private to public. Bigger cohort of students. MUCH better math and science. Not too many private school students doing multivariable calculus or AP physics. Just a better education. Better life experiences. More opportunities to pursue their passions. And also better college outcomes.

This, of course, depends on the school district, I'm sure there are smart, well-adjusted kids going to STA and NCS. But generally, if you're lower county Montgomery it really is kids with higher needs or families that are particularly precious.

PP here. It really depends on where you live, how strong your local public is and what privates. DC is obvious that privates are better. In the suburbs, the privates aren’t necessarily better.

What are you prattling on about? We are zoned for Whitman and we and about half our neighbors use private. None have special needs. It’s a mix of all the schools from woods academy to sidwell. People made - gasp - decisions that work for their family. And I think many find the math and science to be a-ok at the privates. I wouldn’t worry about them anymore. It’s fine. You need to chill about what people around you are doing.

Well, the thread is about private school jealousy

Maybe we live in the same neighborhood. Every family needs to do what's right for their kids. Anecdotally, it's not the smart, nice ones that go to private

.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are a long term (10+ year) public school family that sends our kids to private high schools.

People get very, very weird about it (which makes sense). It eats at their own parenting insecurities---clearly our action of spending $50K for school implies that we (people they like and respect) thought public was not good enough for our kids.
Funny thing is that the insecurity definitely goes both ways (I sometimes regret not staying in public and there are many things about public that I miss).

So we don't talk about it. At all. Or only in the most generic ways. I never, ever say anything that could be conceived as bragging. I stick to all other kid issues: extracurriculars, sports, behavior challenges, friend issues, etc.
There is lots to talk about with ever delving into the school topic.
It works and we've maintained strong friendships.

Do your public school friends have a need to park there cars far away, so you can't see that they cost more than yours. Probably not, right? Then why should you have to worry about their insecurity about you choosing private school? You are placating their insecurity.

Usually the insecure one is the one who fears their kid(s) can’t hack it in the “big” public school so opt for the “small” private school and hand holding. Then they do the same for college, a small lib arts school.

DP here. We were going to switch our kids out of public. Our public has so many smart talented students. Besides the Big 3, I don’t think the DMV privates do much better than the top publics in terms of college admissions. We have confidence in our kids and they really didn’t want to switch so we decided to keep them in public.

The ones we are switching are usually the kids who are not the top students. Yes, 1 or 2 may switch to STA or NCS but the rest are usually the wealthier ones who weren’t the top. Of course there are the private school students who always were in private. The ones who switch from public are the ones who often didn’t do well socially or academically. I’m not saying they were struggling but they weren’t the ones who were at the top.

Exactly this. We switched from private to public. Bigger cohort of students. MUCH better math and science. Not too many private school students doing multivariable calculus or AP physics. Just a better education. Better life experiences. More opportunities to pursue their passions. And also better college outcomes.

This, of course, depends on the school district, I'm sure there are smart, well-adjusted kids going to STA and NCS. But generally, if you're lower county Montgomery it really is kids with higher needs or families that are particularly precious.

PP here. It really depends on where you live, how strong your local public is and what privates. DC is obvious that privates are better. In the suburbs, the privates aren’t necessarily better.

What are you prattling on about? We are zoned for Whitman and we and about half our neighbors use private. None have special needs. It’s a mix of all the schools from woods academy to sidwell. People made - gasp - decisions that work for their family. And I think many find the math and science to be a-ok at the privates. I wouldn’t worry about them anymore. It’s fine. You need to chill about what people around you are doing.

Well, the thread is about private school jealousy

Maybe we live in the same neighborhood. Every family needs to do what's right for their kids. Anecdotally, it's not the smart, nice ones that go to private

.

Well, in ours, it’s not the involved, conscientious parents that chose public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are a long term (10+ year) public school family that sends our kids to private high schools.

People get very, very weird about it (which makes sense). It eats at their own parenting insecurities---clearly our action of spending $50K for school implies that we (people they like and respect) thought public was not good enough for our kids.
Funny thing is that the insecurity definitely goes both ways (I sometimes regret not staying in public and there are many things about public that I miss).

So we don't talk about it. At all. Or only in the most generic ways. I never, ever say anything that could be conceived as bragging. I stick to all other kid issues: extracurriculars, sports, behavior challenges, friend issues, etc.
There is lots to talk about with ever delving into the school topic.
It works and we've maintained strong friendships.

Do your public school friends have a need to park there cars far away, so you can't see that they cost more than yours. Probably not, right? Then why should you have to worry about their insecurity about you choosing private school? You are placating their insecurity.

Usually the insecure one is the one who fears their kid(s) can’t hack it in the “big” public school so opt for the “small” private school and hand holding. Then they do the same for college, a small lib arts school.

DP here. We were going to switch our kids out of public. Our public has so many smart talented students. Besides the Big 3, I don’t think the DMV privates do much better than the top publics in terms of college admissions. We have confidence in our kids and they really didn’t want to switch so we decided to keep them in public.

The ones we are switching are usually the kids who are not the top students. Yes, 1 or 2 may switch to STA or NCS but the rest are usually the wealthier ones who weren’t the top. Of course there are the private school students who always were in private. The ones who switch from public are the ones who often didn’t do well socially or academically. I’m not saying they were struggling but they weren’t the ones who were at the top.

Exactly this. We switched from private to public. Bigger cohort of students. MUCH better math and science. Not too many private school students doing multivariable calculus or AP physics. Just a better education. Better life experiences. More opportunities to pursue their passions. And also better college outcomes.

This, of course, depends on the school district, I'm sure there are smart, well-adjusted kids going to STA and NCS. But generally, if you're lower county Montgomery it really is kids with higher needs or families that are particularly precious.

PP here. It really depends on where you live, how strong your local public is and what privates. DC is obvious that privates are better. In the suburbs, the privates aren’t necessarily better.

What are you prattling on about? We are zoned for Whitman and we and about half our neighbors use private. None have special needs. It’s a mix of all the schools from woods academy to sidwell. People made - gasp - decisions that work for their family. And I think many find the math and science to be a-ok at the privates. I wouldn’t worry about them anymore. It’s fine. You need to chill about what people around you are doing.

Well, the thread is about private school jealousy

Maybe we live in the same neighborhood. Every family needs to do what's right for their kids. Anecdotally, it's not the smart, nice ones that go to private

.

Well, in ours, it’s not the involved, conscientious parents that chose public.

Our neighborhood sends kids to a mix of privates, not the same one. We wanted our kids to attend school with kids in the same neighborhood. This was very important to us. Our kids are happy and thriving. I know they would do well in private as well.

[Anonymous]

The neighbors have their kid in private. They’ve had to switch schools multiple times in the last year, they’re not a good fit, they say. I hope they find something for their kid (who is a good kid)…and Ive never once asked why their kid doesn’t go to the neighborhood school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The neighbors have their kid in private. They’ve had to switch schools multiple times in the last year, they’re not a good fit, they say. I hope they find something for their kid (who is a good kid)…and Ive never once asked why their kid doesn’t go to the neighborhood school.

I don’t think that’s the kind of private that inspires the kind of jealousy this thread is about, mate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are a long term (10+ year) public school family that sends our kids to private high schools.

People get very, very weird about it (which makes sense). It eats at their own parenting insecurities---clearly our action of spending $50K for school implies that we (people they like and respect) thought public was not good enough for our kids.
Funny thing is that the insecurity definitely goes both ways (I sometimes regret not staying in public and there are many things about public that I miss).

So we don't talk about it. At all. Or only in the most generic ways. I never, ever say anything that could be conceived as bragging. I stick to all other kid issues: extracurriculars, sports, behavior challenges, friend issues, etc.
There is lots to talk about with ever delving into the school topic.
It works and we've maintained strong friendships.

Do your public school friends have a need to park there cars far away, so you can't see that they cost more than yours. Probably not, right? Then why should you have to worry about their insecurity about you choosing private school? You are placating their insecurity.

Usually the insecure one is the one who fears their kid(s) can’t hack it in the “big” public school so opt for the “small” private school and hand holding. Then they do the same for college, a small lib arts school.

DP here. We were going to switch our kids out of public. Our public has so many smart talented students. Besides the Big 3, I don’t think the DMV privates do much better than the top publics in terms of college admissions. We have confidence in our kids and they really didn’t want to switch so we decided to keep them in public.

The ones we are switching are usually the kids who are not the top students. Yes, 1 or 2 may switch to STA or NCS but the rest are usually the wealthier ones who weren’t the top. Of course there are the private school students who always were in private. The ones who switch from public are the ones who often didn’t do well socially or academically. I’m not saying they were struggling but they weren’t the ones who were at the top.

Exactly this. We switched from private to public. Bigger cohort of students. MUCH better math and science. Not too many private school students doing multivariable calculus or AP physics. Just a better education. Better life experiences. More opportunities to pursue their passions. And also better college outcomes.

This, of course, depends on the school district, I'm sure there are smart, well-adjusted kids going to STA and NCS. But generally, if you're lower county Montgomery it really is kids with higher needs or families that are particularly precious.

PP here. It really depends on where you live, how strong your local public is and what privates. DC is obvious that privates are better. In the suburbs, the privates aren’t necessarily better.

What are you prattling on about? We are zoned for Whitman and we and about half our neighbors use private. None have special needs. It’s a mix of all the schools from woods academy to sidwell. People made - gasp - decisions that work for their family. And I think many find the math and science to be a-ok at the privates. I wouldn’t worry about them anymore. It’s fine. You need to chill about what people around you are doing.

Well, the thread is about private school jealousy

Maybe we live in the same neighborhood. Every family needs to do what's right for their kids. Anecdotally, it's not the smart, nice ones that go to private

.

Well, in ours, it’s not the involved, conscientious parents that chose public.

Our neighborhood sends kids to a mix of privates, not the same one. We wanted our kids to attend school with kids in the same neighborhood. This was very important to us. Our kids are happy and thriving. I know they would do well in private as well.

Cool. We have neighborhood friends and school friends that live in our neighborhood. Our kids also, thriving and happy. Not sure what the point of this post is. Nobody assumes everyone is jealous. Weird people that start rambling about the math and science being so much better and it being so important to have neighborhood friends and how much better life and college chances are at public and how great it is that they can take international trips, yeah, I assume those weirdos are jealous. So don’t go around doing that, and nobody will get confused.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are a long term (10+ year) public school family that sends our kids to private high schools.

People get very, very weird about it (which makes sense). It eats at their own parenting insecurities---clearly our action of spending $50K for school implies that we (people they like and respect) thought public was not good enough for our kids.
Funny thing is that the insecurity definitely goes both ways (I sometimes regret not staying in public and there are many things about public that I miss).

So we don't talk about it. At all. Or only in the most generic ways. I never, ever say anything that could be conceived as bragging. I stick to all other kid issues: extracurriculars, sports, behavior challenges, friend issues, etc.
There is lots to talk about with ever delving into the school topic.
It works and we've maintained strong friendships.

Do your public school friends have a need to park there cars far away, so you can't see that they cost more than yours. Probably not, right? Then why should you have to worry about their insecurity about you choosing private school? You are placating their insecurity.

Usually the insecure one is the one who fears their kid(s) can’t hack it in the “big” public school so opt for the “small” private school and hand holding. Then they do the same for college, a small lib arts school.

DP here. We were going to switch our kids out of public. Our public has so many smart talented students. Besides the Big 3, I don’t think the DMV privates do much better than the top publics in terms of college admissions. We have confidence in our kids and they really didn’t want to switch so we decided to keep them in public.

The ones we are switching are usually the kids who are not the top students. Yes, 1 or 2 may switch to STA or NCS but the rest are usually the wealthier ones who weren’t the top. Of course there are the private school students who always were in private. The ones who switch from public are the ones who often didn’t do well socially or academically. I’m not saying they were struggling but they weren’t the ones who were at the top.

Exactly this. We switched from private to public. Bigger cohort of students. MUCH better math and science. Not too many private school students doing multivariable calculus or AP physics. Just a better education. Better life experiences. More opportunities to pursue their passions. And also better college outcomes.

This, of course, depends on the school district, I'm sure there are smart, well-adjusted kids going to STA and NCS. But generally, if you're lower county Montgomery it really is kids with higher needs or families that are particularly precious.

PP here. It really depends on where you live, how strong your local public is and what privates. DC is obvious that privates are better. In the suburbs, the privates aren’t necessarily better.

What are you prattling on about? We are zoned for Whitman and we and about half our neighbors use private. None have special needs. It’s a mix of all the schools from woods academy to sidwell. People made - gasp - decisions that work for their family. And I think many find the math and science to be a-ok at the privates. I wouldn’t worry about them anymore. It’s fine. You need to chill about what people around you are doing.

Well, the thread is about private school jealousy

Maybe we live in the same neighborhood. Every family needs to do what's right for their kids. Anecdotally, it's not the smart, nice ones that go to private

.

Well, in ours, it’s not the involved, conscientious parents that chose public.

Our neighborhood sends kids to a mix of privates, not the same one. We wanted our kids to attend school with kids in the same neighborhood. This was very important to us. Our kids are happy and thriving. I know they would do well in private as well.

Cool. We have neighborhood friends and school friends that live in our neighborhood. Our kids also, thriving and happy. Not sure what the point of this post is. Nobody assumes everyone is jealous. Weird people that start rambling about the math and science being so much better and it being so important to have neighborhood friends and how much better life and college chances are at public and how great it is that they can take international trips, yeah, I assume those weirdos are jealous. So don’t go around doing that, and nobody will get confused.

Not everyone who commented is the same person. I don’t know why that pp said the comment about international trips.

If we are hanging out with our neighbors, we are not talking about the private school family who is not hanging out with us. Don’t worry. We don’t do that. I am not confused. They are not confused. No one is confused.

[Anonymous]

There have been multiple threads about college admissions from public and private. Private school parents often say that is not why they chose private. If my kid is going to Boston College, he can go from public. I don’t see many more ivy admits from the non Big 3 privates than the local top publics.