Grades - I screwed up
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Anonymous
Wow. Unbelievable. How rude are you? My mother is a first-generation immigrant who can speak English very well and doesn't have an accent and is also a successful doctor. And it's not being competitive it's called trying to do the best for your kids, so they don't have to struggle as much as you did. |
Anonymous
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OP here. I love my kids unconditionally. Love, is different from launching them into adulthood. I support all my kids’ dreams. When their dreams don’t align with reality, that’s my job to state the hard facts an adult.
As for killing me over the Excel spreadsheet, it’s important For them to know where they are, where they hope to go, etc... Too often, everyone is giving them bullshit feedback at school. You’re not getting into the school you want with a 3.75 is simply a fact. What’s so evil about telling them facts. She’s an amazing person who will definitely do amazing things. My job as a parent is part guidance. Understanding and trying to launch the kid in a direction they choose, with guidance. Do you think parents shouldn’t tell their kids at some point - you just aren’t there? Sugar coat their lives. |
Anonymous
dp What would you do if your dd really tried but, did not get into the school she wishes? Will you think of her as a failure? |
Anonymous
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OP here. Not all all. I’d think she tried and failed with realistic guidance. And she’d continue trying some more things. Hopefully with mentors along her course.
She’s in 9th grade. There are many more opportunities to fail and succeed. Learning to rise above failure is a #1 for me to teach her. Paired with level setting... so you want to be POTUS, that’s a stretch goal... how do u get there? |
Anonymous
| Plenty of kids launch without a crazy parent. Or despite one. If OP's dd "launches" it will be despite this lunatic, not because of. |
Anonymous
| It’s not your job to launch your child to Yale or the presidency or whatever “stretch goal” a kid sets in middle school. My middle child wants to be a pro soccer player right now. It’s pretty sick to latch onto that and then try to make it happen. It’s not my job to berate him when he plays poorly and scream at him about what it takes to get where he wants to go. It’s my job to love him and remind him that we hope he has fun and is a good teammate. |
Anonymous
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Op here. Good luck with your everyone gets a trophy kid. Fact is, life is challenging. Lots of competition.
When do you except them to learn about their competition? |
Anonymous
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Ugh.. expect...
Seriously, by 9th grade, they shouldn’t get this. If not then, when? 18? 22? 34? |
Anonymous
I hope they learn that “life is a competition” is a trap, and they can opt out of it. They don’t have to be a superstar at anything for us to love them and value them. |
Anonymous
Steve Jobs mother would have been excited about an 84 or any grade above failing in school. There are so so many successful people in this world that have gotten 84's and F's for that matter. You are so so wrong... |
Anonymous
OP here, you’ll have plenty of time to snuggle your little snowflake living in your basement. Maybe he even cleans his damn room by then. 
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Anonymous
OP here, it’s ok you got an F. You’re likely the next Steve Jobs!!! |
Anonymous
| OP here yet again. Forgot to mention, we aren’t wealthy riding coat tails. So yeah, grades matter a lot. |
Anonymous
Do you really think that someone has to be the best, #1, no mistakes, no average grades ever, in order to have a successful, happy, independent life? Surely you realize that’s nuts... |
Anonymous
No not what I said. You are blowing an 84 way out of proportion. We are not talking about F's. Your child will fail in college because they won't be able to breathe. Good luck with that. There are tons of people that do more than fine in life with average grades in HS. As a matter of fact some are movers and shakers, some are CEO's, CTO's etc. My kid went to an IVY Graduated with degree in Engineering minor in CS. Had a 3.9 in college. Definitely got a few 80's or below in his HS career. He's a CTO now again my parenting or yours. I will go with mine. Proven results six kids.... |