How do you get an affair/relationship started with another married person?

[Anonymous]

OP here. glad to see that this thread caught life. seems like some good conversation happening and good advice being thrown around for people interested in going under the right circumstance.

also funny to see the name "rico suave" which i coined for our advice columnist has stuck and carried forward for many pages.

[Anonymous]

What's funny is, even knowing this, I bet I would still fall for those tactics...AND I already did once. *sigh*

[Anonymous]

Not Rico- but he’s right. You let them dump you. After some time, she'll gets attached to you and will fantasize about how to be together on a full time basis. Obviously by then you’ve made it abundantly clear that you’re not leaving your situation. Since she won’t be able to change you, she’ll naturally gravitate back to her DH. She may even start to enjoy sex with him for a spell as she'll miss regular sex. She will also be happy and secure as both worlds haven't blown up.

Because they’ve dumped you, they may still keep in contact with you. Of the 4 I’ve known, 3 still do. One after 2+ years called me for a lunch. As she was leaving the room, we hugged and she said it could never happen again. I patted her on her ass on the way out and said I’d see her soon. She turned & smiled as she walked down the hall….

[Anonymous]

Rico, if you are really Rica, do you write books under a pseudonym?

[Anonymous]

Interesting info on how to break up with a sociopath:

http://www.sociopathworld.com/2008/10/how-to-break-up-with-sociopath.html

[Anonymous]

So it looks like the best way to break up with a sociopath is also the best way to break up with a non-sociopath according to a sociopath. It does make sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:


I have found someone that fits the above criteria but still working on getting him from talking about sex and actually having sex. Right now it would be hard for me to find a close substitute.

So he actually talks about sex but won't do you? That's even more frustrating than my situation.

It's complicated because I am a client, not a coworker. There might be some work rules at play, like literally, don't fuck the clients or you will lose your job.

Stepping off the merry-go-round. Going elsewhere for professional services. Left him with my cell and contact info. if he wants to continue our chats. Therefore, ball is totally in his court.

1) People in his office were beginning to notice our chemistry so continuing seeing each other at his workplace would eventually cause problems for him there. Not interested in nor do I want to be responsible for causing problems for him at work.

2) If he is such a dumb ass he doesn't know the phone number is his green light to pursue the affair, then he is too stupid and/or naive to deal with.

3) If he is a man whore tease or has had a change of heart, then he won't call and I know the affair will never happen. I don't like the idea that someone may be stringing me along just to get an ego boost.

Would appreciate a man who is upfront with his intentions or non-intentions. Again, older women do not like the games.

[ThatSmileyFaceGuy]

It may not be an ego boost or game playing, but he is probably sure that he is going to get caught

[Anonymous]

ThatSmileyFaceGuy wrote:It may not be an ego boost or game playing, but he is probably sure that he is going to get caught

Hey, nice to see you joining the chat. I was wondering when you would chime in.

I don't know how he could get caught unless he told his wife or someone else he knows and word got back to her. His wife and my husband work long hours in DC. We are in the burbs during the day, about 15 minutes from each other.

An after work hookup would be difficult because of childcare situations, but not impossible. A mid-day hookup, even over lunch breaks, would be more realistic and would service both our needs.

However, I do have a fantasy of visiting his man cave and giving him the best BJ while he plays his violent video games. Probably would never happen, just a turn on when he described the games to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:


I have found someone that fits the above criteria but still working on getting him from talking about sex and actually having sex. Right now it would be hard for me to find a close substitute.

So he actually talks about sex but won't do you? That's even more frustrating than my situation.

It's complicated because I am a client, not a coworker. There might be some work rules at play, like literally, don't fuck the clients or you will lose your job.

Stepping off the merry-go-round. Going elsewhere for professional services. Left him with my cell and contact info. if he wants to continue our chats. Therefore, ball is totally in his court.

1) People in his office were beginning to notice our chemistry so continuing seeing each other at his workplace would eventually cause problems for him there. Not interested in nor do I want to be responsible for causing problems for him at work.

2) If he is such a dumb ass he doesn't know the phone number is his green light to pursue the affair, then he is too stupid and/or naive to deal with.

3) If he is a man whore tease or has had a change of heart, then he won't call and I know the affair will never happen. I don't like the idea that someone may be stringing me along just to get an ego boost.

Would appreciate a man who is upfront with his intentions or non-intentions. Again, older women do not like the games.

Yes! This is so true. If we give our signals, please follow through, guys. Playing hard to get will eventually bore us.

[ThatSmileyFaceGuy]

Anonymous wrote:

ThatSmileyFaceGuy wrote:It may not be an ego boost or game playing, but he is probably sure that he is going to get caught

Hey, nice to see you joining the chat. I was wondering when you would chime in.

I don't know how he could get caught unless he told his wife or someone else he knows and word got back to her. His wife and my husband work long hours in DC. We are in the burbs during the day, about 15 minutes from each other.

An after work hookup would be difficult because of childcare situations, but not impossible. A mid-day hookup, even over lunch breaks, would be more realistic and would service both our needs.

However, I do have a fantasy of visiting his man cave and giving him the best BJ while he plays his violent video games. Probably would never happen, just a turn on when he described the games to me.

Up to this point I was happily reading along with everyone else. Hookups through work can be difficult. Especially if his co-workers maybe already giving him crap about the obvious tension between the two of you. You gave him your number and once things calm down a little in his office he might call. But right now I think he may realize that others may suspect something is up and is nervous about contacting you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Curses, PP! I was going to post that and you have beaten me to it! Zounds!

[Anonymous]

Oh thank heavens TSFG is here. With his sage assistance, we shall all be able to resolve our problems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Curses, PP! I was going to post that and you have beaten me to it! Zounds!

Hah! I foiled you again.

Rrrrrrrrrrrico! Suavvvvvvvvveee!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Curses, PP! I was going to post that and you have beaten me to it! Zounds!

Hah! I foiled you again.

Rrrrrrrrrrrico! Suavvvvvvvvveee!

All will be forgiven if you're an attractive woman under 50 that has a fetish for overweight, balding guys.