Lack Of Eye Candy At Janney

[Anonymous]

So why are you reading it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is literally the stupidest thread I have ever seen on these boards -- and it had a lot of competition.

It's the fourth ranked thread in DCUM's hottest topics--- how can it be stupid? It's far better than "Posters your sick of!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^Is that a Janney mom boosting herself? Are those your actual boots?

I won't tell...

[Anonymous]

Seriously, a lot of the Janney men have had their penises stolen due to the recent rash of car glove box thefts in the area. It's nothing to laugh about.

[Anonymous]

With temperatures in the low 40s this morning, even the heartiest of Janney trou-meat was retracted virtually into the body cavity and undetectable to all but the most determined passerby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is literally the stupidest thread I have ever seen on these boards -- and it had a lot of competition.

It's the fourth ranked thread in DCUM's hottest topics--- how can it be stupid? It's far better than "Posters your sick of!"[/quote]

Now third ranked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seriously, a lot of the Janney men have had their penises stolen due to the recent rash of car glove box thefts in the area. It's nothing to laugh about.

Janney families, check your insurance coverage. Many policies do not cover penises. This happened to my DH, and we were forced to go out of pocket (no pun intended) to obtain a replacement unit. I have repeatedly asked Norah to announce these thefts to the Janney community, to no avail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seriously, a lot of the Janney men have had their penises stolen due to the recent rash of car glove box thefts in the area. It's nothing to laugh about.

Janney families, check your insurance coverage. Many policies do not cover penises. This happened to my DH, and we were forced to go out of pocket (no pun intended) to obtain a replacement unit. I have repeatedly asked Norah to announce these thefts to the Janney community, to no avail.

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seriously, a lot of the Janney men have had their penises stolen due to the recent rash of car glove box thefts in the area. It's nothing to laugh about.

Janney families, check your insurance coverage. Many policies do not cover penises. This happened to my DH, and we were forced to go out of pocket (no pun intended) to obtain a replacement unit. I have repeatedly asked Norah to announce these thefts to the Janney community, to no avail.

We were sort of lucky when this happened to my DH recently, in that it had been tossed into a nearby bin. Fortunately, the trash collectors had not yet emptied the bins for the day! We were able to polish it up a bit and now it no longer bends to the left! I know some you will smile to yourselves and think: "Digging through trash bins for a 57 year old penis"? Never! Janney moms are resourceful AND thrifty if nothing else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seriously, a lot of the Janney men have had their penises stolen due to the recent rash of car glove box thefts in the area. It's nothing to laugh about.

Janney families, check your insurance coverage. Many policies do not cover penises. This happened to my DH, and we were forced to go out of pocket (no pun intended) to obtain a replacement unit. I have repeatedly asked Norah to announce these thefts to the Janney community, to no avail.

We were sort of lucky when this happened to my DH recently, in that it had been tossed into a nearby bin. Fortunately, the trash collectors had not yet emptied the bins for the day! We were able to polish it up a bit and now it no longer bends to the left! I know some you will smile to yourselves and think: "Digging through trash bins for a 57 year old penis"? Never! Janney moms are resourceful AND thrifty if nothing else.

Plus the Chico wear allows them the flexibilty to dig in a bin AND work the penis after retrevial.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seriously, a lot of the Janney men have had their penises stolen due to the recent rash of car glove box thefts in the area. It's nothing to laugh about.

Janney families, check your insurance coverage. Many policies do not cover penises. This happened to my DH, and we were forced to go out of pocket (no pun intended) to obtain a replacement unit. I have repeatedly asked Norah to announce these thefts to the Janney community, to no avail.

It's got to be an organized ring--to make it worthwhile you'd have to steal a lot of them and glue them together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seriously, a lot of the Janney men have had their penises stolen due to the recent rash of car glove box thefts in the area. It's nothing to laugh about.

Janney families, check your insurance coverage. Many policies do not cover penises. This happened to my DH, and we were forced to go out of pocket (no pun intended) to obtain a replacement unit. I have repeatedly asked Norah to announce these thefts to the Janney community, to no avail.

It's got to be an organized ring--to make it worthwhile you'd have to steal a lot of them and glue them together.

~wiping tears from eyes~

[Anonymous]

^^the thought that someone right in our own community could be behind this--hoarding them! Well. I'm outraged.

[Anonymous]

We would have been glad to have lost DH's from the glove box. Instead, DH was a victim of one of the recent robberies, and was forced to detach his at gunpoint. He said that he hated to admit it, but his embarrassment at having to fiddle with it in front of the robber exceeded his fear of being shot! He was even too bashful to raise the issue at Mary Cheh's last crime summit. I thought other Tenley dads should know, but I respected his wishes.

[Anonymous]

We are partly to blame as we have been repeatedly warned to keep our penises hidden--Those with wide girth are especially popular; you can get distracted playing with them--we know this.