Guys, let's be clear: JD Vance didn't have sex with his couch!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Author and journalist Noah Rothman (American writer, editor, former MSNBC commentator, podcaster, and author. He is a senior writer and podcast guest for National Review, and he previously served as associate editor, podcast producer, and online editor for Commentary) slammed the Associated Press as “sleazy” for deleting the article, and for giving the fake claim — which emanated from an anonymous X user with less than 1,800 followers — any oxygen whatsoever.

“Last night, the AP published a ‘fact check’ of utterly unknown nobodies who alleged that JD Vance fornicated a couch, not because anyone believed that but because it introduces that nonsense into the bloodstream. Today, it’s gone. So sleazy.”

CNN senior reporter Andy Kaczynski apparently bewildered by the decision to delete the article, posted a link to the deleted AP story, saying, “AP fact-checked what was a joke from left-wing Twitter – but the link for this is dead now and I can no longer find the story on the AP website. What is going on?”

It was a joke, but it was a joke that went viral because people didn't realize it was a joke. It seems extremely plausible—he wrote a very bad book that is full of weird things, insulting things and stuff that undermines his seriousness. So it was plausible that he would write something so stupid, and then he absolutely looks like a person who would eff a couch AND tell people about it.

Once it started going viral, it fooled a lot of people, because it's so realistic it almost isn't a joke, and then the AP was right to clear it up. But they were a tiny bit sloppy in their wording, saying there was no evidence he was couch effer, when they MEANT to say there was no evidence he WROTE that he was a couch effer. Becuase they are actually an organization with an insane amount of integrity, they realized they could not truthfully write that it was not true that he effed a couch, because they didn't know. So they pulled the article.

It's so funny and it's going to lead to Vance getting booted from the ticket.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For the rest of this man’s life, whenever he sits on a couch, people will look at him and think…

“I’ll bet he's a sofa humper.”

"Have a seat! Just don't start gettin' too handsy." :wink wink:

I chuckled and then reread your post to snicker at it. Nicely done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Associated Press has credibility problems. Embarrassing for them.

They weren't able to confirm whether he did or didn't have sex with a couch?

An ottoman has come forward claiming to be Vance's son.

The Trump ticket needs to appeal to the Michael Jackson estate to see if they can use the song Billlie Jean for their rallies

Lazy Boy is not my lover.
She's just the couch that claims that I am the one,
But the chair is not my son.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look, I've been posting threads clearly up mistruths that MAGA freaks are spreading about Harris and Vance and I think it's important that we be fair... it's NOT true that JD Vance wrote in his book that he had sex with couch cushions. It just REALLY seems like it could be true.

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/jd-vance-couch-cushions/

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

OP You have totally missed the point. No one cares if it’s true, the reason it blew is because it could be true.

People are looking at this ridiculous doughy man and being like yep, that guys F$&ks couches.

I hope Trump keeps Vance on the ticket because he’s terrible, on the other hand it would be so great for him to get dumped. his political career would be over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP You have totally missed the point. No one cares if it’s true, the reason it blew is because it could be true.

People are looking at this ridiculous doughy man and being like yep, that guys F$&ks couches.

I hope Trump keeps Vance on the ticket because he’s terrible, on the other hand it would be so great for him to get dumped. his political career would be over.

Hmmm the OP literally wrote

“
Look, I've been posting threads clearly up mistruths that MAGA freaks are spreading about Harris and Vance and I think it's important that we be fair... it's NOT true that JD Vance wrote in his book that he had sex with couch cushions. It just REALLY seems like it could be true.”

[Anonymous]

Bet there's a video somewhere of him calling a couch uppity before he sat on it.

[Anonymous]

If only vance were David sedaris, he COULD Have put in a memoir how he had sex with a couch (basement, not the living room, for heavens sake) and we would have thought it funny and heartwarming. But we libs are biased towards people who are genuine.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOL, when you google "Vance," autocomplete puts in "couch."

That’s a nice bit of symmetry because Vance completes when he puts in a couch!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What are they calling him now?

I think it's "Heterosectional"

Homosectional seems more accurate.

[Anonymous]

Trump is a gossip queen so he is for sure hearing these JD gay rumors.

[Anonymous]

I wish that excerpt was true, but it can’t be real

[jsteele]

Anonymous wrote:I wish that excerpt was true, but it can’t be real

I have removed the excerpt because it is certainly not real. I don' have a copy of the book on hand (strange because I am pretty sure I both an ebook version) but there are several indications beyond the lewd content that it is fake.