This was a real post on my neighborhood listserv

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This post is really despicable. When I first read op I didn't know what was worse - the "victim" stoping to complain about a fucking pine cone or the mother with her martyrdom syndrome.

In any event, op's conduct is worse than both the victim's and the mother, because although she didn't post the mother's name here, I am 99% sure that most of the people who live in this neighborhood in Bethesda visit this website and upon seeing this WILL recognize the mother.

And I am also sure they will all comment about it - some making fun, some pitying, etc. They will also comment on the answer's the mother got here about her and her son.

The only person who will NOT be commented about it op - a coward who hid behind an anonymous board to bring public shame to one of her neighbors. While her post on the listserve was idiotic, we ALL had the opportunity to do something idiotic once or twice in our lives (AT LEAST). NO ONE deserves this kind of shame - it is as bad as if op had published the mother's name here.

It would be different if this listserve was in a neighborhood in AK for instance, where no one else might know this site exists and make the correlation.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This post is really despicable. When I first read op I didn't know what was worse - the "victim" stoping to complain about a fucking pine cone or the mother with her martyrdom syndrome.

In any event, op's conduct is worse than both the victim's and the mother, because although she didn't post the mother's name here, I am 99% sure that most of the people who live in this neighborhood in Bethesda visit this website and upon seeing this WILL recognize the mother.

And I am also sure they will all comment about it - some making fun, some pitying, etc. They will also comment on the answer's the mother got here about her and her son.

The only person who will NOT be commented about it op - a coward who hid behind an anonymous board to bring public shame to one of her neighbors. While her post on the listserve was idiotic, we ALL had the opportunity to do something idiotic once or twice in our lives (AT LEAST). NO ONE deserves this kind of shame - it is as bad as if op had published the mother's name here.

It would be different if this listserve was in a neighborhood in AK for instance, where no one else might know this site exists and make the correlation.

This is awesome. Let this thread rest in peace.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This post is really despicable. When I first read op I didn't know what was worse - the "victim" stoping to complain about a fucking pine cone or the mother with her martyrdom syndrome.

In any event, op's conduct is worse than both the victim's and the mother, because although she didn't post the mother's name here, I am 99% sure that most of the people who live in this neighborhood in Bethesda visit this website and upon seeing this WILL recognize the mother.

And I am also sure they will all comment about it - some making fun, some pitying, etc. They will also comment on the answer's the mother got here about her and her son.

The only person who will NOT be commented about it op - a coward who hid behind an anonymous board to bring public shame to one of her neighbors. While her post on the listserve was idiotic, we ALL had the opportunity to do something idiotic once or twice in our lives (AT LEAST). NO ONE deserves this kind of shame - it is as bad as if op had published the mother's name here.

It would be different if this listserve was in a neighborhood in AK for instance, where no one else might know this site exists and make the correlation.

Yeah, I get what you're trying to say. However, the listserve m

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This post is really despicable. When I first read op I didn't know what was worse - the "victim" stoping to complain about a fucking pine cone or the mother with her martyrdom syndrome.

In any event, op's conduct is worse than both the victim's and the mother, because although she didn't post the mother's name here, I am 99% sure that most of the people who live in this neighborhood in Bethesda visit this website and upon seeing this WILL recognize the mother.

And I am also sure they will all comment about it - some making fun, some pitying, etc. They will also comment on the answer's the mother got here about her and her son.

The only person who will NOT be commented about it op - a coward who hid behind an anonymous board to bring public shame to one of her neighbors. While her post on the listserve was idiotic, we ALL had the opportunity to do something idiotic once or twice in our lives (AT LEAST). NO ONE deserves this kind of shame - it is as bad as if op had published the mother's name here.

It would be different if this listserve was in a neighborhood in AK for instance, where no one else might know this site exists and make the correlation.

+1

Hit send too soon. Sorry. My point was that I get waht you're saying. However, the listserve mom is guilty of the same thing as op. if she really felt wronged, she should have taken it up with the neighbor. SHE took it to a public forum (albeit a smaller one) and publicly shamed the guy. In her small little Bethesda world, she was probably gossiping with neighbors about how horrible the other driver was, and called him out in their own public forum. They all probably know who the driver is as well. Sounds like she just got a more potent dose of her own medicine.

[Anonymous]

Sorry for typos.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This post is really despicable. When I first read op I didn't know what was worse - the "victim" stoping to complain about a fucking pine cone or the mother with her martyrdom syndrome.

In any event, op's conduct is worse than both the victim's and the mother, because although she didn't post the mother's name here, I am 99% sure that most of the people who live in this neighborhood in Bethesda visit this website and upon seeing this WILL recognize the mother.

And I am also sure they will all comment about it - some making fun, some pitying, etc. They will also comment on the answer's the mother got here about her and her son.

The only person who will NOT be commented about it op - a coward who hid behind an anonymous board to bring public shame to one of her neighbors. While her post on the listserve was idiotic, we ALL had the opportunity to do something idiotic once or twice in our lives (AT LEAST). NO ONE deserves this kind of shame - it is as bad as if op had published the mother's name here.

It would be different if this listserve was in a neighborhood in AK for instance, where no one else might know this site exists and make the correlation.

+1

Hit send too soon. Sorry. My point was that I get waht you're saying. However, the listserve mom is guilty of the same thing as op. if she really felt wronged, she should have taken it up with the neighbor. SHE took it to a public forum (albeit a smaller one) and publicly shamed the guy. In her small little Bethesda world, she was probably gossiping with neighbors about how horrible the other driver was, and called him out in their own public forum. They all probably know who the driver is as well. Sounds like she just got a more potent dose of her own medicine.

This is my thoughts exactly. OP brought all of this on herself. She could have just dealt with her son, and dealt with the neighbor and MOVED THE F#CK ON. She went ahead and posted it on the neighborhood listserve. She WANTED people to comment. She invited comments by private email. She wanted attention, and she got it.

[Anonymous]

PP again - Not OP, but The PineCone Lady brought all of this on herself!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing revealed to dcum general, but certainly to the listserv moms who are on dcum. Privacy isn't the issue even.

It's just plain inexcusable meanness.

It is DCUM. They have never been nice here.

And so it's okay? Is that also what we should teach our children?

Okay, so the pine come lady gets a pass? She gets to go on her neighborhood listserve and post a public rant against a neighbor. But, you're on here criticizing OP for reposting it?

Lol, strange logic.

Yes, because in a case like this, mockery is a far worse offense. It is a uniquely mean thing to do. If you were somewhere surrounded by members of your social circle, would you rather someone come up to you and express anger about something you did or make fun of you, for everyone to hear? What would make you feel worse next time you happened to pass someone from that social circle on the street?

In this case, in especially mean because now this mother may well know that people in her neighborhood have been mocking her but she won't know exactly who. How should she feel at the next playdate or out walking the dog or at the next school function when she engages in conversation with people she knows are on the listserv?

Umm, yes, exactly. That is the point. The Pinecone Lady went on her listserve to bitch about her neighbor. That was pretty obnoxious. Why didn't she just deal with him one on one? Sorry, but she brought this on herself.

[Anonymous]

We need a lot more shame in this world. It would keep people from doing dumb shit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We need a lot more shame in this world. It would keep people from doing dumb shit.

I'm all for empowerment and self esteem, but I'm inclined to think a lot of people are going overboard with their precious snowflakes. I think a little shame is a good thing.

[Anonymous]

The email writer posted her cuckcoo rant on a public neighborhood list serve. Yes, she is going to be mocked. Her own damn fault for outing herself as a super special snowflake Mom with similar progeny.

[Anonymous]

This thread has revealed humanity in all its vile filth.

It is truly an increasing avalanche of ever-grosser degradation, from the spiteful little child, no doubt laughing as he hurled his missile at the unsuspecting motorist, to the motorist, delighting in screaming at the poor defenseless child, to the preening mother, plastering her passive-aggressive hypocrisy across Bethesda, to the privacy-stealing anonymous OP, smearing this grotesque incident across the World Wide Web, to the screeching harpies, homophobes and proverb-misquoters alighting on the sorry tale like vultures on the bloated purifying corpse of a baby hippopotamus.

No, I am afraid that no one, except possibly me, has emerged from this wretched little tale covered in glory. SHAME ON ALL OF YOU!

[Anonymous]

takoma wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, I guess I'm inviting everyone to mock me as well, but here goes. . .

I don't think the mother's email was really off base. It's not something I would probably send, but my reaction as a recipient would have been mild sympathy.

Some kids have a really strong sense of shame, especially at that age, and many have a strong sense of justice as well. In combination, I can see where a mother would be frustrated at how this played out. My nephew is like that. I can easily imagine him ruminating on this and feeling really bad and embarrassed for a long time.

I also think if you're going to really take someone to task, especially a stranger who won't have the opportunity to follow up later, it's better not to do it in a hit-and-run fashion. The kid is not entitled to "closure" as the mother put it, but it would nice. Since the guy took on the role of "village" in this situation, he could have take the extra 30 seconds to do it more productively. Learning to apologize meaningfully is important and this was a lost opportunity for that. One of my biggest peeves is those terrible, passive-voice, "I'm sorry if what I said/did offended you," nonapologies that you hear all the time.

What else would you say if you said something you think needed saying, but you know that, unfortunately, someone was offended? I want to express my sympathy, but I'm not apologizing. Surely people know that sorry is not a synonym for apology. If not, I'm sorry to hear it.

We use "regret" in our family. As in "I regret that my actions hurt you," which is true but does not force a fake apology if we're not actually sorry we did them.

[Anonymous]

all i got from this thread is that there is some sort of niche market for pinecones purses. day made.

[Anonymous]

Pinecone Lady, watch out: the crazy talk on the Cleveland Park listserv got its own tumblr blog AND a Huff Post writeup: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/30/cleveland-park-listserv_n_3186047.html

All this makes me wish my neighborhood had a listserv!