Need an African American to Explain this Behavior

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is it so important to "not crack"? I agree with the foreign poster. I am confused. If I was not here hundreds of years ago (nor were you but I'll play along here) - what is all the hate? Hostility is the way to go?

I ask because you will notice when you go on vacation or visit certain places that you can't be nice to some AA's - they act suspicious of your motives. That to me is f*cked up, considering I never met that person before and they are hostile in exchange to normal every day pleasantries.

Where I come from people are civil.

You have no idea what 'Black don't crack' means do you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is it so important to "not crack"? I agree with the foreign poster. I am confused. If I was not here hundreds of years ago (nor were you but I'll play along here) - what is all the hate? Hostility is the way to go?

I ask because you will notice when you go on vacation or visit certain places that you can't be nice to some AA's - they act suspicious of your motives. That to me is f*cked up, considering I never met that person before and they are hostile in exchange to normal every day pleasantries.

Where I come from people are civil.

You have no idea what 'Black don't crack' means do you?

My black co workers have used this to say they don't get wrinkles.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is it so important to "not crack"? I agree with the foreign poster. I am confused. If I was not here hundreds of years ago (nor were you but I'll play along here) - what is all the hate? Hostility is the way to go?

I ask because you will notice when you go on vacation or visit certain places that you can't be nice to some AA's - they act suspicious of your motives. That to me is f*cked up, considering I never met that person before and they are hostile in exchange to normal every day pleasantries.

Where I come from people are civil.

I can't....

[Anonymous]

Put another way (because I am genuinely interested) -If someone is from somewhere where it is NOT hostile: how are they supposed to understand hostility?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
You are hundreds of years old? WHOA......

Dumbo. We as a race of people have smiled at you for 100 years. Wake up, will you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I'm not white.

I don't care what race you are. Black mother here. My son would never behave this way, and the behavior is beyond my comprehension, so how could I answer why this was done to you? Were you looking fearful? Did you run to your car? Did you clutch your baby closer? Now, when I have experienced that type of behavior from people it surely pisses me off. I am no one you need to cross the street from. I have no interested, nor does anyone in my family have interest in snatching your purse. Maybe you looked terrified at coming across 4 black males? If so, maybe that's why one of them spit!

So . . . b/c one person is ignorant, that gives others the right to spit? out of anger? out of injustice?

way to eliminate stereotypes, PP

Good job, lady!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the below event to be an act of racism, but I would like a member from the African American community to verify or help me see why I'm wrong.

While picking up my child from daycare today (between Cameron Station and Old Town Alexandria, just off of Duke Street), I encountered four African American males while walking back to my car, 10 month old child in arms. My car was parked in front of the daycare building along the curb. They, the four African American youths (between 18 and 25 of age), were walking parallel to the street, on the street itself. We reached my car at the same time. One of the youths looked at me while I reached for my car door and, without breaking stride, spat on the driver's side of the door while looking me right in the eye.

Racism? Or am I overreacting?

black guy here.

it seems like these AA species you encountered simply spat on your window to inform you that your vehicle needs cleaning. they either spat on your car to provide the water they felt you needed to wipe down your window or they were simply giving you the universal negro sign of "fuck you"

So that's how "Negroes" act? like animals?

I can't believe how angry people are. I don't give a rat's ass what color your fucking skin is. ANY person who spits on someone else or on someone's item is an ignorant low life.

I'm amazed at how some blacks are actually defending that disgusting behavior.

It's always a sign of class to say fuck you by spitting, isn't it?

[Anonymous]

jeff,

this thread has really hit a low point. help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That is just reprehensible. I don't know why everyone wants to jump on here claiming it's not representative of young black male behavior, but I have seen this sort of behavior from young black males, too -- and have never seen it from any other race in this country. I don't think this act was racism against OP, but I do think it's a deep cultural and social issue that many urban black males grow up behaving this way, but get a pass because it's "racist" to call them out. I'm calling them out: this is not the way a human being in a civilized nation should ever treat the mother of a baby in front of that baby, and PPs are fooling themselves if they think it doesn't cause people like OP and me to associate those behaviors with the whole group. I know this is an unpopular thing to say and think.

Get oppressed for a couple hundred years and see how chiiper you are.
Based on op's comments I suspect I'd spit on him too.

Op let your wife handle drop off and pick up from now on.
You are an asshole. And I doubt only young black 'you-dths' rub you the wrong way.
By the way feel free to go back to where you came from.

I hate this argument, not bc I ignore history and the fact that there are racial issues, but bc YOU PERSONALLY have not experienced racism for hundreds of fucking years. Yes, your predecessors did; but that excuses you now for blanket aggression towards everyone else who was not involved in treating you differently. This coming from a Latino, if it makes a fucking difference to you anyway. And if you want to talk about "going where you came from" does that apply to everyone across the board whose family immigrated here. Because we can make this really UN-PC all day, idiot. God, that just annoys me.

Please learn your history. Jim Crow ended less than 50 years ago. Many of the black people who were oppressed under these govt-sanctioned laws are alive today.

[Anonymous]

OP,

I am a black mother, but I can't answer why this teen did this to you I'm not really sure why we're discussing "youths" when one person did this really nasty thing.

From my experience of growing up in the ghettos of DC:

-Some Asians who run convenience stores/carry outs/beauty supply stores are extremely rude and extremely suspicious of their black patrons. They set up shop in black neighborhoods and proceed to act like having them for a customer is a bother. This creates distrust between the two groups.
-Many (not just black people) see Asian males as weak and/or not that masculine. This might have especially been true in your case if you were making baby noises as you walked with your child. This does not excuse their behavior, but sometimes assholes will prey on people they perceive as weak.
-You say you noticed this boy as you walked with your child (noting the walking pattern, etc). This suggests that you were "watching" the youths. Perhaps they took this as fear and took offense? Not saying it's right, but some teens are incredibly immature and don't know how to deal with graciously handling a "diss".

Bottom line. This was a terrible act. I'm sorry it happened. I don't know if the teen did this because he didn't like Asians, because he thought you were weak or because he thought you had dissed him. Either way, it was wrong. I hope you don't blame and/or attribute certain behavior to all black people as a result of an unruly and disrespectful black teen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP,

I am a black mother, but I can't answer why this teen did this to you I'm not really sure why we're discussing "youths" when one person did this really nasty thing.

From my experience of growing up in the ghettos of DC:

-Some Asians who run convenience stores/carry outs/beauty supply stores are extremely rude and extremely suspicious of their black patrons. They set up shop in black neighborhoods and proceed to act like having them for a customer is a bother. This creates distrust between the two groups.
-Many (not just black people) see Asian males as weak and/or not that masculine. This might have especially been true in your case if you were making baby noises as you walked with your child. This does not excuse their behavior, but sometimes assholes will prey on people they perceive as weak.
-You say you noticed this boy as you walked with your child (noting the walking pattern, etc). This suggests that you were "watching" the youths. Perhaps they took this as fear and took offense? Not saying it's right, but some teens are incredibly immature and don't know how to deal with graciously handling a "diss".

Bottom line. This was a terrible act. I'm sorry it happened. I don't know if the teen did this because he didn't like Asians, because he thought you were weak or because he thought you had dissed him. Either way, it was wrong. I hope you don't blame and/or attribute certain behavior to all black people as a result of an unruly and disrespectful black teen.

+1. Thanks for a thoughtful and non-insulting response.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:jeff,

this thread has really hit a low point. help.

What's your race/ethnicity?

I took a very uncomfortable class on equity with one black and one white trainer. It was through the discomfort that we could finally get to the root of some of these issues that are pervasive today. During one activity, we were asked to write down every nasty word or phrase that came to mind with regard to race. We thought that was bad enough. From there, we had to trade cards and read the responses aloud.

There is ignorance on both side, believe me. But b/c we're so PC - SO afraid of telling the truth - we get nowhere.

ANY person - regardless of race - who spits on another person (or near another) w/o being provoked is ignorant and deserves to be called on his/her behavior. And those who defended that disgusting behavior are just as ignorant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:jeff,

this thread has really hit a low point. help.

What's your race/ethnicity?

I took a very uncomfortable class on equity with one black and one white trainer. It was through the discomfort that we could finally get to the root of some of these issues that are pervasive today. During one activity, we were asked to write down every nasty word or phrase that came to mind with regard to race. We thought that was bad enough. From there, we had to trade cards and read the responses aloud.

There is ignorance on both side, believe me. But b/c we're so PC - SO afraid of telling the truth - we get nowhere.

ANY person - regardless of race - who spits on another person (or near another) w/o being provoked is ignorant and deserves to be called on his/her behavior. And those who defended that disgusting behavior are just as ignorant.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP,

I am a black mother, but I can't answer why this teen did this to you I'm not really sure why we're discussing "youths" when one person did this really nasty thing.

From my experience of growing up in the ghettos of DC:

-Some Asians who run convenience stores/carry outs/beauty supply stores are extremely rude and extremely suspicious of their black patrons. They set up shop in black neighborhoods and proceed to act like having them for a customer is a bother. This creates distrust between the two groups.
-Many (not just black people) see Asian males as weak and/or not that masculine. This might have especially been true in your case if you were making baby noises as you walked with your child. This does not excuse their behavior, but sometimes assholes will prey on people they perceive as weak.
-You say you noticed this boy as you walked with your child (noting the walking pattern, etc). This suggests that you were "watching" the youths. Perhaps they took this as fear and took offense? Not saying it's right, but some teens are incredibly immature and don't know how to deal with graciously handling a "diss".

Bottom line. This was a terrible act. I'm sorry it happened. I don't know if the teen did this because he didn't like Asians, because he thought you were weak or because he thought you had dissed him. Either way, it was wrong. I hope you don't blame and/or attribute certain behavior to all black people as a result of an unruly and disrespectful black teen.

+1. Thanks for a thoughtful and non-insulting response.

+1

[Anonymous]

I honestly respect the posters (ANY color) who come forward with dialogue. If no one talks about it, it certainly won't resolve itself. Should we just pretend racism (both sides) doesn't exist to make certain PPs more comfortable?

Thank you AA PP for being honest about how races perceive others - this is helpful! I think more people should ask questions and post helpful information instead of snarky comments and pearl clutching nonsense "why I never!". Sure you have, honey. And if you haven't, you are either truly naive and/or need to shut up more and pay attention.

That said, my question is this: when I moved to the area, the first thing I noticed was the hostility between most races (all directions). Why might racism be worse here than other parts of the country (given that other parts have the same diversity and representation of races - NOT lack of one or the other race)?

Also, if someone is new to the U.S., I am sure they do not understand why one or the other side hates or acts out toward one or the other side. To elaborate on what OP might be asking. i.e.: if someone has not been in the country that long, they may not be familiar with certain parts of U.S. history, so saying to them that "we've smiled for 100 years" might not mean anything to them.