Women lying/ gate keeping around where clothes are from

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I had no idea so many women are so triggered by another woman asking where their dress is from. Is this an east coast thing? I guess some women are really competitive with other women instead of helpful and open. That is so unfortunate. This may be a really good way to test who is a good friend or not. Ask where their dress is from and if they answer, you have a genuine, caring person. If they don’t, you have a pretentious, competitive weirdo. Choose which type of friend you prefer.

Sorry you just found out how rude and obnoxious your nosy questions are.

Can you please explain why this is thought of as rude and obnoxious?

Serious question.

Is it just because you don’t want someone copy? Or do you feel it reveals how much money you spend on clothes (which of course doesn’t necessarily correlate to how much money you have)?
Other?

Because there can be a wrong answer. Maybe I don’t shop at a cool store, or maybe I spent too much or too little and now you’re judging for it. And the askers are definitely judging as demonstrated here. It’s a party, just relax and make polite conversation with people you don’t know.

It's because she's insecure and likely very judgmental since she assumes everyone else is judging her, when in reality they don't care enough about her to bother and are just making conversation.

Ok. If that’s your best attempt at making conversation you should probably practice more. Do you often social anxiety?

You should stop day drinking as a hobby and try something more productive.

Multiple people have said it’s weird, don’t do it, yet there’s you missing social cues thinking everyone else is the problem.

And multiple people have said it's not weird. It's really not that big of a deal either way.

Ok so don’t be like op and get hurt if people blow off your question because now you know.

I actually don't ask questions like this but have no issue if someone asked about what I am wearing.

You might be in the wrong if you ask, but you won't ever be wrong if you don't ask at all. And what's the point? Are people running out to Anthropologie to buy that dress they just heard about? What if you run into the person again wearing that dress? Awkward.

Funny how running into the person wearing the same LV bag is never awkward.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if opinions on this question are related to profession at all?

100%. Definitely age / generation too

I think it’s more related to class and upbringing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Women are freaks.

takes one to know one

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you knew it was from Anthropology, why did you ask?

I didn't know, I asked if it was and she said no, but it in fact was from anthropologie.

But was it? It might have been, but I’m wondering if it’s a brand that might also be carried at free people or nordstrom.

There do seem to be people who willingly share details (I’m like that, whenever I get a compliment on something, I immediately say where I got it) and there are other people who just say thank you. To each their own, but my people are the sharers.

That said, I don’t think it is weird if people don’t want to share. Though worries of being “copied” seem really juvenile or insecure.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I had no idea so many women are so triggered by another woman asking where their dress is from. Is this an east coast thing? I guess some women are really competitive with other women instead of helpful and open. That is so unfortunate. This may be a really good way to test who is a good friend or not. Ask where their dress is from and if they answer, you have a genuine, caring person. If they don’t, you have a pretentious, competitive weirdo. Choose which type of friend you prefer.

Sorry you just found out how rude and obnoxious your nosy questions are.

Can you please explain why this is thought of as rude and obnoxious?

Serious question.

Is it just because you don’t want someone copy? Or do you feel it reveals how much money you spend on clothes (which of course doesn’t necessarily correlate to how much money you have)?
Other?

Because there can be a wrong answer. Maybe I don’t shop at a cool store, or maybe I spent too much or too little and now you’re judging for it. And the askers are definitely judging as demonstrated here. It’s a party, just relax and make polite conversation with people you don’t know.

It's because she's insecure and likely very judgmental since she assumes everyone else is judging her, when in reality they don't care enough about her to bother and are just making conversation.

Ok. If that’s your best attempt at making conversation you should probably practice more. Do you often social anxiety?

You should stop day drinking as a hobby and try something more productive.

Multiple people have said it’s weird, don’t do it, yet there’s you missing social cues thinking everyone else is the problem.

And multiple people have said it's not weird. It's really not that big of a deal either way.

Ok so don’t be like op and get hurt if people blow off your question because now you know.

I actually don't ask questions like this but have no issue if someone asked about what I am wearing.

You might be in the wrong if you ask, but you won't ever be wrong if you don't ask at all. And what's the point? Are people running out to Anthropologie to buy that dress they just heard about? What if you run into the person again wearing that dress? Awkward.

Funny how running into the person wearing the same LV bag is never awkward.

LOL!!!!!!

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Because Anthropologie is basic and people in Brooklyn want to be more unique.

This.
I can't tell you how everytime I meet with some hipster living in Brooklyn they feel a need to demonstrate their unique personality. I'm not talking about the long-timers in Bayridge who grew up there. I'm talking about the new settlers.

That's bc most came from some small town and are not unique at all but try really hard to look like they are.

It's not just the recent adults but the kids too.
I went on a tour of Brooklyn Tech and the student giving the tour couldn't stop trying to demonstrate how funny and interesting her quips were. She was from Brooklyn.
And then there are the parents who drag their kids to indie rock concerts. Their poor kids are sitting in a lounge staring at their phones not paying any attention to the music.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I had no idea so many women are so triggered by another woman asking where their dress is from. Is this an east coast thing? I guess some women are really competitive with other women instead of helpful and open. That is so unfortunate. This may be a really good way to test who is a good friend or not. Ask where their dress is from and if they answer, you have a genuine, caring person. If they don’t, you have a pretentious, competitive weirdo. Choose which type of friend you prefer.

Sorry you just found out how rude and obnoxious your nosy questions are.

Can you please explain why this is thought of as rude and obnoxious?

Serious question.

Is it just because you don’t want someone copy? Or do you feel it reveals how much money you spend on clothes (which of course doesn’t necessarily correlate to how much money you have)?
Other?

Because there can be a wrong answer. Maybe I don’t shop at a cool store, or maybe I spent too much or too little and now you’re judging for it. And the askers are definitely judging as demonstrated here. It’s a party, just relax and make polite conversation with people you don’t know.

It's because she's insecure and likely very judgmental since she assumes everyone else is judging her, when in reality they don't care enough about her to bother and are just making conversation.

Ok. If that’s your best attempt at making conversation you should probably practice more. Do you often social anxiety?

You should stop day drinking as a hobby and try something more productive.

Multiple people have said it’s weird, don’t do it, yet there’s you missing social cues thinking everyone else is the problem.

And multiple people have said it's not weird. It's really not that big of a deal either way.

Ok so don’t be like op and get hurt if people blow off your question because now you know.

I actually don't ask questions like this but have no issue if someone asked about what I am wearing.

You might be in the wrong if you ask, but you won't ever be wrong if you don't ask at all. And what's the point? Are people running out to Anthropologie to buy that dress they just heard about? What if you run into the person again wearing that dress? Awkward.

Funny how running into the person wearing the same LV bag is never awkward.

It's a whole lot less weird than if they asked you where you got yours then showed up with the same one next week. Stalker. OP knows how to find the dresses she likes anyway so why ask?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if opinions on this question are related to profession at all?

100%. Definitely age / generation too

I think it’s more related to class and upbringing.

Did you read that in the social register on your way to America?

[Anonymous]

Is this a DMV/east coast thing?

Never heard of women being so catty/secretive in the west coast

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I had no idea so many women are so triggered by another woman asking where their dress is from. Is this an east coast thing? I guess some women are really competitive with other women instead of helpful and open. That is so unfortunate. This may be a really good way to test who is a good friend or not. Ask where their dress is from and if they answer, you have a genuine, caring person. If they don’t, you have a pretentious, competitive weirdo. Choose which type of friend you prefer.

Sorry you just found out how rude and obnoxious your nosy questions are.

Can you please explain why this is thought of as rude and obnoxious?

Serious question.

Is it just because you don’t want someone copy? Or do you feel it reveals how much money you spend on clothes (which of course doesn’t necessarily correlate to how much money you have)?
Other?

Because there can be a wrong answer. Maybe I don’t shop at a cool store, or maybe I spent too much or too little and now you’re judging for it. And the askers are definitely judging as demonstrated here. It’s a party, just relax and make polite conversation with people you don’t know.

It's because she's insecure and likely very judgmental since she assumes everyone else is judging her, when in reality they don't care enough about her to bother and are just making conversation.

Ok. If that’s your best attempt at making conversation you should probably practice more. Do you often social anxiety?

You should stop day drinking as a hobby and try something more productive.

Multiple people have said it’s weird, don’t do it, yet there’s you missing social cues thinking everyone else is the problem.

And multiple people have said it's not weird. It's really not that big of a deal either way.

Ok so don’t be like op and get hurt if people blow off your question because now you know.

I actually don't ask questions like this but have no issue if someone asked about what I am wearing.

You might be in the wrong if you ask, but you won't ever be wrong if you don't ask at all. And what's the point? Are people running out to Anthropologie to buy that dress they just heard about? What if you run into the person again wearing that dress? Awkward.

Funny how running into the person wearing the same LV bag is never awkward.

It is if the bag is distinctive in some way. Among people who can afford them, no one is going to blink at two women with the same Neverfull, but also no one is going to run up and ask where you got it either because it's obvious.

But yes showing up to an event wearing the same distinctive designer dress or bag would be awkward. And if someone asked where you bought something distinctive and then you went out and bought it and showed up wearing it later, this would be viewed as tacky and rude. That doesn't mean women don't share tips about where to shop or what designers they like -- they do this all the time. But they don't shop each other's wardrobes at social events because it's considered impolite and weird.

[Anonymous]

God DCUM is so weird.
I don’t mind if someone asks where something is from and assuming I remember I will tell them.
Why wouldn’t I? No one I know is going to copy my whole wardrobe and I’m not insecure. If I got something cute from Anthro, Amazon, or spent $4k on a dress from a boutique I’m an open book.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:God DCUM is so weird.
I don’t mind if someone asks where something is from and assuming I remember I will tell them.
Why wouldn’t I? No one I know is going to copy my whole wardrobe and I’m not insecure. If I got something cute from Anthro, Amazon, or spent $4k on a dress from a boutique I’m an open book.

But if you genuinely didn't remember where it was from and said so, the OP would go hunting for it online and assume you were "gatekeeping" when you said you didn't remember.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:God DCUM is so weird.
I don’t mind if someone asks where something is from and assuming I remember I will tell them.
Why wouldn’t I? No one I know is going to copy my whole wardrobe and I’m not insecure. If I got something cute from Anthro, Amazon, or spent $4k on a dress from a boutique I’m an open book.

I'm sure that's not the only thing that's open.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:God DCUM is so weird.
I don’t mind if someone asks where something is from and assuming I remember I will tell them.
Why wouldn’t I? No one I know is going to copy my whole wardrobe and I’m not insecure. If I got something cute from Anthro, Amazon, or spent $4k on a dress from a boutique I’m an open book.

+1. And seriously, who the F cares if they do decide to “copy” you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God DCUM is so weird.
I don’t mind if someone asks where something is from and assuming I remember I will tell them.
Why wouldn’t I? No one I know is going to copy my whole wardrobe and I’m not insecure. If I got something cute from Anthro, Amazon, or spent $4k on a dress from a boutique I’m an open book.

+1. And seriously, who the F cares if they do decide to “copy” you?

I do. I care. I put a lot of effort into my style, which is distinctive, and I don't like having a woman in my social circle copying exact items from my wardrobe. If you want to do it, I can't stop you, but I'm not going to *help* you by providing you an itemized list of everything I'm wearing and where I bought it.