“First come, first serve” household?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a class issue.

X100000

This sums it up very well, on all counts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op back. I’ll have to add the “that is so odd” for the shock from PPs at taking plates home as from the circles I have been in people always take food from events with them home when there is extra. What do people in your circles do with the extra food after the event or holiday dinner?

Holiday meal leftovers belong to the host, unless offered to guests.

Oh damn - a whole new post right here.

Op back. This is funny to me. I think I always thought people took leftovers home. Almost all dinners that are Christmas, Thanksgiving, etc are usually in my circles cooked by either older women who are widowed/divorced and have no children at home or single unmarried men. So there’s always plenty to go around that they wouldn’t be able to finish.

I’ll throw two curve balls or what I think would surprise people - speaking of MILs. My MIL cooks ahead and freezes food for holiday events. She will then freeze leftovers no one took and reheat them for the next occasion. So it’s Thanksgiving leftovers at Christmas in a free for all environment but you can take whatever leftovers home. I’ll admit I do not take a plate of the Christmas leftovers. There’s also not a set start time for that Thanksgiving (or Christmas) dinner so the people who arrive at 3pm may be eating what’s done by 3pm and the people arriving at 7pm are eating what’s leftover or freshly finished.

Gross. I would not eat the food from Thanksgiving past. I would also not want someone to set aside a plate of that yuck. I'll pick and choose my own food and quantities, thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op back. I’ll have to add the “that is so odd” for the shock from PPs at taking plates home as from the circles I have been in people always take food from events with them home when there is extra. What do people in your circles do with the extra food after the event or holiday dinner?

Holiday meal leftovers belong to the host, unless offered to guests.

Oh damn - a whole new post right here.

I mean, if the host purchased the ingredients for the meal, this is undeniably correct, no? I think it's nice when a host offers leftovers to their guests, but it's beyond rude for guests to whip out a Tupperware and pack up food for themselves, unless this is the known "culture of the family." If someone did this in my house my mouth would be hanging open in shock.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Means the kids will eat like animals competing for prey when they get older. Not a good look.

This simply is not true.

My husband grew up this way. It’s entirely true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op back. I’ll have to add the “that is so odd” for the shock from PPs at taking plates home as from the circles I have been in people always take food from events with them home when there is extra. What do people in your circles do with the extra food after the event or holiday dinner?

Holiday meal leftovers belong to the host, unless offered to guests.

Oh damn - a whole new post right here.

Op back. This is funny to me. I think I always thought people took leftovers home. Almost all dinners that are Christmas, Thanksgiving, etc are usually in my circles cooked by either older women who are widowed/divorced and have no children at home or single unmarried men. So there’s always plenty to go around that they wouldn’t be able to finish.

I’ll throw two curve balls or what I think would surprise people - speaking of MILs. My MIL cooks ahead and freezes food for holiday events. She will then freeze leftovers no one took and reheat them for the next occasion. So it’s Thanksgiving leftovers at Christmas in a free for all environment but you can take whatever leftovers home. I’ll admit I do not take a plate of the Christmas leftovers. There’s also not a set start time for that Thanksgiving (or Christmas) dinner so the people who arrive at 3pm may be eating what’s done by 3pm and the people arriving at 7pm are eating what’s leftover or freshly finished.

I'm so confused.

That sounds awful OP!

We ask what we can being. Though, not sure how to get around the old/refrozen food. Ew.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Means the kids will eat like animals competing for prey when they get older. Not a good look.

This simply is not true.

My husband grew up this way. It’s entirely true.

Same. It’s bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I am definitely fascinated by the perspectives here.

Holiday PP yes that’s a great example, this would be a time where I may ask for someone to set aside my plate. Whereas another PP noted it should be a free for all for those in attendance when the meal is served. I’ve never been to a formal dinner party actually but Thanksgiving, Christmas dinner, Mothers Day brunch etc…

Ok, it’s annoying that you’re always asking people to “set aside a plate” for you.

Holiday pp here. We did it once, because we noticed MIL was happy to do so, several times, for perpetually and very late SIL. MIL took issue with doing it once for our small kids (not us, we were happy to stop at McDonalds, and we did. It was Christmas.) so, we never asked again.

DH mentioned that every night was a free for all at his house, because in spite of there being enough money, there was never enough food, and they were expected to eat chips or cereal to supplement.

OTOH, my family had less money growing up, but always had more than enough fresh, healthy food- mostly because of our gardens. It struck me as odd behaviors about food, when I met DHs family. DH agreed, once he met my family.

Are you really that shocked that your MIL ranks her own daughter above you? This plate saving business is so weird. Get to the dinner on time if it’s so important.

Wow. Okay, bitter MIL. You would refuse to feed your small grandchildren on a major holiday? And “rank” your kids/grandkids - like it is a military rank and file? Like a pack of dogs in the wild?

So gross! So telling! So primitive.

No way would that nonsense ever happen with food, in my parents or our house. We weren’t raised rich, but we were raised better.

Maybe get over your narcissistic, selfish, self centered, codependent, unhealthy, self. For shame.

Bitter MIL? Are you high? I'm not my MILs daughter and I don't expect her to be treated like that. Get to the dinner on time. What is the reason you can't do that? So weird. But your personality is really starting to shine through it's revealing.

You are correct. My personality is revealing that you are wrong and grossly selfish, and you don’t like it. Too bad.

If my DIL is late once to a holiday dinner, you better believe that not only are her kids having food saved for them by me, but also plates for their (gasp!) entire family.

Quel horreur!

You are totally weird. Why do several plates need to be lined up "saved"? Is there going to be a shortage of food at Thanksgiving or something? Why not just serve yourself from the leftovers when you get there? You're describing something very odd and not normal at a holiday dinner that special plates are set aside as if there won't be an abundance of food. If food is so short and scarce, what are you bringing to the dinner you can't be bothered to show up for on time?

My question is for the daughter who was late multiple times with her family. Why did one set of grandkids, who were late multiple times, get food set aside “several plates need to be lined up saved” (sic - as if PP was there, and actually knew what was saved for the daughter’s family. Huh.) and one set, the ones who were late one time, not given food? Since there was obviously not enough food.

That seems like a really, really cruel thing to do to little kids. Bet they asked about that on the way home from the visit.

That is the weird part. That, and PP being so very strangely being invested in this conversation.

Maybe some MILs enjoy drama, and teach exactly what not to do, thankfully.

Without the details how do we know? But WTF kind of Thanksgiving is this where nobody comes on time and there's not enough food? MIL likely at least knows her daughter well enough to know what kind of food she will eat. I don't need or want my MIL to make me a plate.

Maybe the MIL has food and control issues, and likes to passively aggressively puppeteer situations.

For all you know, MIL enables/handicaps the daughter and neglects/empowers the son. You would have no way of knowing the background of a situation unless you are actually in that family.

You would also not know, unless you have kids in such a family.

It is probably not about food, but the MILs angry ways. I suppose that would be hurtful and tiresome after a number of years.

But I would not pretend to know unless I was in that situation myself. Wondering why the daughter would not have stepped up and done the right thing? Especially after having food saved for her and her family, more than once. Maybe she is just as selfish as the mom.

Setting aside a plate is not the hill I would die on because I would actively not want my MIL to do that for me. Can you imagine the messages she could be sending with that? No carbs, less meat, all vegetables, etc. There are posts here all the time about people angry that in-laws serve the food instead of people serving themselves and people hate that. All we know is the PP is mad a plate isn't being set aside, regardless of the situation, I would never want that or for MIL to prove her love for me that way. It's not worth a deep dive into that PPs family dynamics because it's irrelevant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I am definitely fascinated by the perspectives here.

Holiday PP yes that’s a great example, this would be a time where I may ask for someone to set aside my plate. Whereas another PP noted it should be a free for all for those in attendance when the meal is served. I’ve never been to a formal dinner party actually but Thanksgiving, Christmas dinner, Mothers Day brunch etc…

Ok, it’s annoying that you’re always asking people to “set aside a plate” for you.

Holiday pp here. We did it once, because we noticed MIL was happy to do so, several times, for perpetually and very late SIL. MIL took issue with doing it once for our small kids (not us, we were happy to stop at McDonalds, and we did. It was Christmas.) so, we never asked again.

DH mentioned that every night was a free for all at his house, because in spite of there being enough money, there was never enough food, and they were expected to eat chips or cereal to supplement.

OTOH, my family had less money growing up, but always had more than enough fresh, healthy food- mostly because of our gardens. It struck me as odd behaviors about food, when I met DHs family. DH agreed, once he met my family.

Are you really that shocked that your MIL ranks her own daughter above you? This plate saving business is so weird. Get to the dinner on time if it’s so important.

Wow. Okay, bitter MIL. You would refuse to feed your small grandchildren on a major holiday? And “rank” your kids/grandkids - like it is a military rank and file? Like a pack of dogs in the wild?

So gross! So telling! So primitive.

No way would that nonsense ever happen with food, in my parents or our house. We weren’t raised rich, but we were raised better.

Maybe get over your narcissistic, selfish, self centered, codependent, unhealthy, self. For shame.

Bitter MIL? Are you high? I'm not my MILs daughter and I don't expect her to be treated like that. Get to the dinner on time. What is the reason you can't do that? So weird. But your personality is really starting to shine through it's revealing.

You are correct. My personality is revealing that you are wrong and grossly selfish, and you don’t like it. Too bad.

If my DIL is late once to a holiday dinner, you better believe that not only are her kids having food saved for them by me, but also plates for their (gasp!) entire family.

Quel horreur!

You are totally weird. Why do several plates need to be lined up "saved"? Is there going to be a shortage of food at Thanksgiving or something? Why not just serve yourself from the leftovers when you get there? You're describing something very odd and not normal at a holiday dinner that special plates are set aside as if there won't be an abundance of food. If food is so short and scarce, what are you bringing to the dinner you can't be bothered to show up for on time?

My question is for the daughter who was late multiple times with her family. Why did one set of grandkids, who were late multiple times, get food set aside “several plates need to be lined up saved” (sic - as if PP was there, and actually knew what was saved for the daughter’s family. Huh.) and one set, the ones who were late one time, not given food? Since there was obviously not enough food.

That seems like a really, really cruel thing to do to little kids. Bet they asked about that on the way home from the visit.

That is the weird part. That, and PP being so very strangely being invested in this conversation.

Maybe some MILs enjoy drama, and teach exactly what not to do, thankfully.

Without the details how do we know? But WTF kind of Thanksgiving is this where nobody comes on time and there's not enough food? MIL likely at least knows her daughter well enough to know what kind of food she will eat. I don't need or want my MIL to make me a plate.

If the daughter can do no wrong, it sets that daughter up for failure. It is not about the food, at all. Take some Psych classes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I am definitely fascinated by the perspectives here.

Holiday PP yes that’s a great example, this would be a time where I may ask for someone to set aside my plate. Whereas another PP noted it should be a free for all for those in attendance when the meal is served. I’ve never been to a formal dinner party actually but Thanksgiving, Christmas dinner, Mothers Day brunch etc…

Ok, it’s annoying that you’re always asking people to “set aside a plate” for you.

Holiday pp here. We did it once, because we noticed MIL was happy to do so, several times, for perpetually and very late SIL. MIL took issue with doing it once for our small kids (not us, we were happy to stop at McDonalds, and we did. It was Christmas.) so, we never asked again.

DH mentioned that every night was a free for all at his house, because in spite of there being enough money, there was never enough food, and they were expected to eat chips or cereal to supplement.

OTOH, my family had less money growing up, but always had more than enough fresh, healthy food- mostly because of our gardens. It struck me as odd behaviors about food, when I met DHs family. DH agreed, once he met my family.

Are you really that shocked that your MIL ranks her own daughter above you? This plate saving business is so weird. Get to the dinner on time if it’s so important.

Wow. Okay, bitter MIL. You would refuse to feed your small grandchildren on a major holiday? And “rank” your kids/grandkids - like it is a military rank and file? Like a pack of dogs in the wild?

So gross! So telling! So primitive.

No way would that nonsense ever happen with food, in my parents or our house. We weren’t raised rich, but we were raised better.

Maybe get over your narcissistic, selfish, self centered, codependent, unhealthy, self. For shame.

Bitter MIL? Are you high? I'm not my MILs daughter and I don't expect her to be treated like that. Get to the dinner on time. What is the reason you can't do that? So weird. But your personality is really starting to shine through it's revealing.

You are correct. My personality is revealing that you are wrong and grossly selfish, and you don’t like it. Too bad.

If my DIL is late once to a holiday dinner, you better believe that not only are her kids having food saved for them by me, but also plates for their (gasp!) entire family.

Quel horreur!

You are totally weird. Why do several plates need to be lined up "saved"? Is there going to be a shortage of food at Thanksgiving or something? Why not just serve yourself from the leftovers when you get there? You're describing something very odd and not normal at a holiday dinner that special plates are set aside as if there won't be an abundance of food. If food is so short and scarce, what are you bringing to the dinner you can't be bothered to show up for on time?

My question is for the daughter who was late multiple times with her family. Why did one set of grandkids, who were late multiple times, get food set aside “several plates need to be lined up saved” (sic - as if PP was there, and actually knew what was saved for the daughter’s family. Huh.) and one set, the ones who were late one time, not given food? Since there was obviously not enough food.

That seems like a really, really cruel thing to do to little kids. Bet they asked about that on the way home from the visit.

That is the weird part. That, and PP being so very strangely being invested in this conversation.

Maybe some MILs enjoy drama, and teach exactly what not to do, thankfully.

Without the details how do we know? But WTF kind of Thanksgiving is this where nobody comes on time and there's not enough food? MIL likely at least knows her daughter well enough to know what kind of food she will eat. I don't need or want my MIL to make me a plate.

If the daughter can do no wrong, it sets that daughter up for failure. It is not about the food, at all. Take some Psych classes.

What is the relevant to this thread then? If she has MIL issues she should take it to another forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. For the college kids pizza scenario, isn’t it also about taking more for oneself so they don’t have to cook or make food the next day? Not necessarily that that are excessively hungry or are they eating the additional pizza slices in the moment? I know my roommates and I would do that to keep from cooking the next day. Well, I actually know older adult relatives who have always done that fwiw at holiday dinners or events where food is buffet style. If you have something like a large meal with a group of friends and you take leftovers to eat the next day so you don’t have to cook one meal or whatnot. This happened recently at a baby shower. It did ruffle some feathers when some took large portions leaving others with just a small portion to take home. Things like macaroni and cheese, chicken wings, sandwiches and salad. Making a plate to take with you and then making more than one plate before others can make one. I do think in that case you should probably only make one unless you are taking it for family members who did not attend but are in your household.

This is a completely different question than the original question. I think it's reasonable to wait to make sure everyone who is present has firsts before you take seconds. I think it's reasonable to wait until everyone has seconds before you take thirds. I think it's reasonable to ask if anyone wants to share the last of x before you take it.

Leftovers don't exist until everyone present has eaten all they want.

BUT that is not the same as expecting the people who are present and are hungry enough to eat at that moment to stop eating so someone who is somewhere else can have some later.

Disagree. Sometimes I make meals that are expected to last two nights. If people are still hungry, there are other things to munch on. If anyone in my family didn't like that, they would be free to take over the cooking.

Exactly. You had a big honking serving already. Go eat an apple. You’re probably dehydrated too. It registers as hunger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I am definitely fascinated by the perspectives here.

Holiday PP yes that’s a great example, this would be a time where I may ask for someone to set aside my plate. Whereas another PP noted it should be a free for all for those in attendance when the meal is served. I’ve never been to a formal dinner party actually but Thanksgiving, Christmas dinner, Mothers Day brunch etc…

Why aren’t you there when the meal is served? On multiple occasions? I could see “setting aside a plate” if there was some extenuating circumstance making you late for one holiday meal, but it sounds like this happens to you all the time.

Shift work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op back. I’ll have to add the “that is so odd” for the shock from PPs at taking plates home as from the circles I have been in people always take food from events with them home when there is extra. What do people in your circles do with the extra food after the event or holiday dinner?

Holiday meal leftovers belong to the host, unless offered to guests.

Oh damn - a whole new post right here.

Op back. This is funny to me. I think I always thought people took leftovers home. Almost all dinners that are Christmas, Thanksgiving, etc are usually in my circles cooked by either older women who are widowed/divorced and have no children at home or single unmarried men. So there’s always plenty to go around that they wouldn’t be able to finish.

I’ll throw two curve balls or what I think would surprise people - speaking of MILs. My MIL cooks ahead and freezes food for holiday events. She will then freeze leftovers no one took and reheat them for the next occasion. So it’s Thanksgiving leftovers at Christmas in a free for all environment but you can take whatever leftovers home. I’ll admit I do not take a plate of the Christmas leftovers. There’s also not a set start time for that Thanksgiving (or Christmas) dinner so the people who arrive at 3pm may be eating what’s done by 3pm and the people arriving at 7pm are eating what’s leftover or freshly finished.

OK, the reheating months-old, frozen food is gross, but why don't any of these perpetual guests step up and host?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. For the college kids pizza scenario, isn’t it also about taking more for oneself so they don’t have to cook or make food the next day? Not necessarily that that are excessively hungry or are they eating the additional pizza slices in the moment? I know my roommates and I would do that to keep from cooking the next day. Well, I actually know older adult relatives who have always done that fwiw at holiday dinners or events where food is buffet style. If you have something like a large meal with a group of friends and you take leftovers to eat the next day so you don’t have to cook one meal or whatnot. This happened recently at a baby shower. It did ruffle some feathers when some took large portions leaving others with just a small portion to take home. Things like macaroni and cheese, chicken wings, sandwiches and salad. Making a plate to take with you and then making more than one plate before others can make one. I do think in that case you should probably only make one unless you are taking it for family members who did not attend but are in your household.

This is a completely different question than the original question. I think it's reasonable to wait to make sure everyone who is present has firsts before you take seconds. I think it's reasonable to wait until everyone has seconds before you take thirds. I think it's reasonable to ask if anyone wants to share the last of x before you take it.

Leftovers don't exist until everyone present has eaten all they want.

BUT that is not the same as expecting the people who are present and are hungry enough to eat at that moment to stop eating so someone who is somewhere else can have some later.

Disagree. Sometimes I make meals that are expected to last two nights. If people are still hungry, there are other things to munch on. If anyone in my family didn't like that, they would be free to take over the cooking.

Exactly. You had a big honking serving already. Go eat an apple. You’re probably dehydrated too. It registers as hunger.

And eat it OUTSIDE.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I am definitely fascinated by the perspectives here.

Holiday PP yes that’s a great example, this would be a time where I may ask for someone to set aside my plate. Whereas another PP noted it should be a free for all for those in attendance when the meal is served. I’ve never been to a formal dinner party actually but Thanksgiving, Christmas dinner, Mothers Day brunch etc…

Ok, it’s annoying that you’re always asking people to “set aside a plate” for you.

Holiday pp here. We did it once, because we noticed MIL was happy to do so, several times, for perpetually and very late SIL. MIL took issue with doing it once for our small kids (not us, we were happy to stop at McDonalds, and we did. It was Christmas.) so, we never asked again.

DH mentioned that every night was a free for all at his house, because in spite of there being enough money, there was never enough food, and they were expected to eat chips or cereal to supplement.

OTOH, my family had less money growing up, but always had more than enough fresh, healthy food- mostly because of our gardens. It struck me as odd behaviors about food, when I met DHs family. DH agreed, once he met my family.

Are you really that shocked that your MIL ranks her own daughter above you? This plate saving business is so weird. Get to the dinner on time if it’s so important.

Wow. Okay, bitter MIL. You would refuse to feed your small grandchildren on a major holiday? And “rank” your kids/grandkids - like it is a military rank and file? Like a pack of dogs in the wild?

So gross! So telling! So primitive.

No way would that nonsense ever happen with food, in my parents or our house. We weren’t raised rich, but we were raised better.

Maybe get over your narcissistic, selfish, self centered, codependent, unhealthy, self. For shame.

Bitter MIL? Are you high? I'm not my MILs daughter and I don't expect her to be treated like that. Get to the dinner on time. What is the reason you can't do that? So weird. But your personality is really starting to shine through it's revealing.

You are correct. My personality is revealing that you are wrong and grossly selfish, and you don’t like it. Too bad.

If my DIL is late once to a holiday dinner, you better believe that not only are her kids having food saved for them by me, but also plates for their (gasp!) entire family.

Quel horreur!

You are totally weird. Why do several plates need to be lined up "saved"? Is there going to be a shortage of food at Thanksgiving or something? Why not just serve yourself from the leftovers when you get there? You're describing something very odd and not normal at a holiday dinner that special plates are set aside as if there won't be an abundance of food. If food is so short and scarce, what are you bringing to the dinner you can't be bothered to show up for on time?

My question is for the daughter who was late multiple times with her family. Why did one set of grandkids, who were late multiple times, get food set aside “several plates need to be lined up saved” (sic - as if PP was there, and actually knew what was saved for the daughter’s family. Huh.) and one set, the ones who were late one time, not given food? Since there was obviously not enough food.

That seems like a really, really cruel thing to do to little kids. Bet they asked about that on the way home from the visit.

That is the weird part. That, and PP being so very strangely being invested in this conversation.

Maybe some MILs enjoy drama, and teach exactly what not to do, thankfully.

Without the details how do we know? But WTF kind of Thanksgiving is this where nobody comes on time and there's not enough food? MIL likely at least knows her daughter well enough to know what kind of food she will eat. I don't need or want my MIL to make me a plate.

Maybe the MIL has food and control issues, and likes to passively aggressively puppeteer situations.

For all you know, MIL enables/handicaps the daughter and neglects/empowers the son. You would have no way of knowing the background of a situation unless you are actually in that family.

You would also not know, unless you have kids in such a family.

It is probably not about food, but the MILs angry ways. I suppose that would be hurtful and tiresome after a number of years.

But I would not pretend to know unless I was in that situation myself. Wondering why the daughter would not have stepped up and done the right thing? Especially after having food saved for her and her family, more than once. Maybe she is just as selfish as the mom.

Setting aside a plate is not the hill I would die on because I would actively not want my MIL to do that for me. Can you imagine the messages she could be sending with that? No carbs, less meat, all vegetables, etc. There are posts here all the time about people angry that in-laws serve the food instead of people serving themselves and people hate that. All we know is the PP is mad a plate isn't being set aside, regardless of the situation, I would never want that or for MIL to prove her love for me that way. It's not worth a deep dive into that PPs family dynamics because it's irrelevant.

“Prove love”???? Not sure what kind of upbringing of yours that you are projecting?? Hopefully not eating issues on your part.

Someone who has been in a family a number of years, possibly decades, has every right. There are inevitable patterns, some quite horrible, whether outsiders like it or not.

You are correct. If you haven’t been in the family, or even been in such a family that long, you should not pretend to know. But never would I try to shoot down or diminish someone’s first hand experience, in light of or in interest of my own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op back. I’ll have to add the “that is so odd” for the shock from PPs at taking plates home as from the circles I have been in people always take food from events with them home when there is extra. What do people in your circles do with the extra food after the event or holiday dinner?

Holiday meal leftovers belong to the host, unless offered to guests.

Oh damn - a whole new post right here.

Op back. This is funny to me. I think I always thought people took leftovers home. Almost all dinners that are Christmas, Thanksgiving, etc are usually in my circles cooked by either older women who are widowed/divorced and have no children at home or single unmarried men. So there’s always plenty to go around that they wouldn’t be able to finish.

I’ll throw two curve balls or what I think would surprise people - speaking of MILs. My MIL cooks ahead and freezes food for holiday events. She will then freeze leftovers no one took and reheat them for the next occasion. So it’s Thanksgiving leftovers at Christmas in a free for all environment but you can take whatever leftovers home. I’ll admit I do not take a plate of the Christmas leftovers. There’s also not a set start time for that Thanksgiving (or Christmas) dinner so the people who arrive at 3pm may be eating what’s done by 3pm and the people arriving at 7pm are eating what’s leftover or freshly finished.

OK, the reheating months-old, frozen food is gross, but why don't any of these perpetual guests step up and host?

Guessing they try to rotate houses, but sometimes the older generation can be more than a little stubborn, in who brings what, etc.

How often do you host, since you keep asking??