SIL won't allow nephew to propose to his GF

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any sensible parent would give her advice and then hold her peace, not manipulate with threats.

My DD is not moving in with BF, until they are married. There is nothing more that she needs to know about this guy that she does not already know.

You have no control over that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1. Not your business
2. If he really wanted to propose, he would.
3. If he was an adult he’d tell his mom kindly and with love that it was none of her business.

All of this. We got married at 24 and maybe our parents thought we were too young but they didn’t outright say so. Celebrating 20 years very soon. I told DH I would not follow him to law school until we were actually married and he had no problem with this.

[Anonymous]

Life is unpredictable, don't stand between happiness and your young adults. Its hard to find love and compatibility.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No marriage or babies before 30.

They are both ambitious and have no plans to marry or procreate for 5 years. If it weren't for moving to another state and then may be again for new job, they would've waited until he did his MBA and she did her MS.

Then why the rush to get engaged?

Exactly! I think the mom is being practical and the girlfriend is being manipulative. Ultimatums at 23? That poor boy needs to run!

There is no ultimatum but she is reluctant to move. Who can blame her?

Smart girl. I refused to move for my boyfriend at age 24, so he proposed. It’s been nearly 20 years and we are still happily married. No way I was leaving my job and city without a ring.

+1. It’s really not a lot to ask. But if the boy has mommy paying for mba, who’s buying the ring?

Who is buying the ring? Is the girlfriend expecting a nice engagement ring? If he can't afford it without his mother's help, he shouldn't propose.

He is working and earning well so buying a ring isn't an issue. GF is simple and not materialistic, he thinks she would prefer something inexpensive which she can wear without having to worry about loss or theft.

[Anonymous]

If he's earning well, why is this even an issue? I get that it's a big loss if mom decides she's no longer paying for school, but people who want something to happen can make it work if that something is challenging vs impossible

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:His mother won't let him propose? His GF should take the opportunity to end the relationship before she's saddled with a crazy MIL and a husband who won't stand up for himself.

This. Either baby boy shuts Mom down and takes out a loan to finish MBA or I'd walk. Hope this young woman has her family telling her to run.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Way too young to get married.

Counterpoint - I love being a married MBA. Wife worked. Still going strong 25 years later.

OTOH, 23 is too young for MBA. Needs 3-4 years work experience.

I was going to post this. He’s getting a worthless degree. Any school that would let in a kid with only one year of work experience is not a good school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Way too young to get married.

Counterpoint - I love being a married MBA. Wife worked. Still going strong 25 years later.

OTOH, 23 is too young for MBA. Needs 3-4 years work experience.

I was going to post this. He’s getting a worthless degree. Any school that would let in a kid with only one year of work experience is not a good school.

OP said it’s a deferred MBA. He applied in undergrad and will start 2 years after graduating. I know Stanford GBS has a program like this, as does Columbia Law.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No marriage or babies before 30.

They are both ambitious and have no plans to marry or procreate for 5 years. If it weren't for moving to another state and then may be again for new job, they would've waited until he did his MBA and she did her MS.

Then why the rush to get engaged?

Out of state move and likely another move in two years.

Are both partners on board with this? An engagement is legally worthless.

Also, a cold truth: any MBA that accepts 23 year olds with 1 year of work experience at most isn’t worth attending. If it’s for CPA credits, those can be achieved in a different way, and you shouldn’t waste your one chance to an MBA on that when you might want to do one in 5 years.

I know 23 year old who went to great schools for MBAs that young. It's common for SLAC grads

I went to a top five MBA program and was the youngest in my class at 25. Most people were in their late 20s.

[Anonymous]

Engaged is fine but married might be an issue with parents health insurance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mom's perimenopause, dad's midlife crisis and children's toddler/teen tantrums shouldn't happen at same time.

Just another jealous 30-something mom of teens struggling with how her husband is going to pay for three in college at the same time and still afford to take her on the empty nester vacations of her dreams.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Way too young to get married.

Counterpoint - I love being a married MBA. Wife worked. Still going strong 25 years later.

OTOH, 23 is too young for MBA. Needs 3-4 years work experience.

I was going to post this. He’s getting a worthless degree. Any school that would let in a kid with only one year of work experience is not a good school.

OP said it’s a deferred MBA. He applied in undergrad and will start 2 years after graduating. I know Stanford GBS has a program like this, as does Columbia Law.

I don’t know any good mba programs that do this. Law school is very different, sweetheart. As an employer, I wouldn’t hire a 25 year old top ten MBA who had only worked for two years.

[Anonymous]

why are you speculating which MBA he's doing you total gang of striving weirdos?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Way too young to get married.

Counterpoint - I love being a married MBA. Wife worked. Still going strong 25 years later.

OTOH, 23 is too young for MBA. Needs 3-4 years work experience.

I was going to post this. He’s getting a worthless degree. Any school that would let in a kid with only one year of work experience is not a good school.

OP said it’s a deferred MBA. He applied in undergrad and will start 2 years after graduating. I know Stanford GBS has a program like this, as does Columbia Law.

I don’t know any good mba programs that do this. Law school is very different, sweetheart. As an employer, I wouldn’t hire a 25 year old top ten MBA who had only worked for two years.

Here’s one, sweetheart: https://www.gsb.stanford.edu/programs/mba/admission/deferred-enrollment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ah, geez, for such “smart” people everyone (except the gf) sounds ridiculously immature. If nephew is so talented and ambitious and in such a great MBA program, then he can borrow the money and pay for it himself. He sounds like NOT a good catch if he can’t navigate this minor issue directly with his mom. The GF should NOT move with him and focus on her career until he grows up.

This is such a middle class attitude. Y’all hold yourselves back.

This parental money comes with strings that the son doesn’t seem to want to accept (understandably).

This. Letting someone else's money hold you back is a big mistake.