Feeling sad that I don't have a daughter

[Anonymous]

You should thank your lucky stars that you have 2 healthy children and stop feeling sorry for yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I chaperoned a field trip yesterday for my 4th grader. I only have boys so I only get groups of boys when I do these things. They never make the field trip groups co-ed, for some reason. I watched somewhat longingly at the girl parents chaperoning their groups of girls, who for the most part listened and followed along. My boy group was running in the walking areas and I had to stop a few from climbing things. No big deal but they require a bit more physical supervision.

Then I noticed that the girl groups had some more subtle rivalry. A girl would be excluded from a seating arrangement or a conversation. Ugh. Stopping kids from climbing a fence is much easier than that!

There are pros and cons. I love my boys and I would never have wanted anyone differently. I wouldn't have minded an addition of a girl, though.

Because most girls that age don’t want to hang out with boys. Bodies are starting to change, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since this is anonymous OP, I'll admit that I'm so glad I have two daughters for exactly the reasons you outlined. DH loves his parents and is a dutiful Asian son but the level of closeness and frequency of communication is nothing like his sister has with their mom. I don't even like my own mom that much but my kids spend a ton of time at her house and we're in regular communication. It's just a different type of relationship.

Same, 3 daughters 0 sons and I couldn't be happier about it.

Same here. I have two daughters and a son.
I'm thrilled to have daughters. I honestly feel sorry for my friends who only have boys (on the rare occasions that I think about gender).

That said, I've had my own very hard things to deal with. We all do. Most of us don't get everything we want in life.

Same. Two girls and a boy and couldn’t be happier. Even dh was relieved that number 3 was a girl. Our boy is just so much harder and worse behaved.

+1

[Anonymous]

My daughter has been so much harder to parent than my son, she is so stubborn

[Anonymous]

If you have girls, they take care of you in old age because they are more responsible and caring than boys. I have 2 girls, so Im set for life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since this is anonymous OP, I'll admit that I'm so glad I have two daughters for exactly the reasons you outlined. DH loves his parents and is a dutiful Asian son but the level of closeness and frequency of communication is nothing like his sister has with their mom. I don't even like my own mom that much but my kids spend a ton of time at her house and we're in regular communication. It's just a different type of relationship.

Same, 3 daughters 0 sons and I couldn't be happier about it.

Same here. I have two daughters and a son.
I'm thrilled to have daughters. I honestly feel sorry for my friends who only have boys (on the rare occasions that I think about gender).

That said, I've had my own very hard things to deal with. We all do. Most of us don't get everything we want in life.

I do too! And I’m secretly jealous of any family that has two girls. I have one of each.

I feel sorry for parents who have one of each. Your kids wont be as close.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since this is anonymous OP, I'll admit that I'm so glad I have two daughters for exactly the reasons you outlined. DH loves his parents and is a dutiful Asian son but the level of closeness and frequency of communication is nothing like his sister has with their mom. I don't even like my own mom that much but my kids spend a ton of time at her house and we're in regular communication. It's just a different type of relationship.

Same, 3 daughters 0 sons and I couldn't be happier about it.

Same here. I have two daughters and a son.
I'm thrilled to have daughters. I honestly feel sorry for my friends who only have boys (on the rare occasions that I think about gender).

That said, I've had my own very hard things to deal with. We all do. Most of us don't get everything we want in life.

I do too! And I’m secretly jealous of any family that has two girls. I have one of each.

I feel sorry for parents who have one of each. Your kids wont be as close.

I know. But it still didn’t make me want to have 3. Feeling lucky there was no need to go to 3 since we had one of each. We didn’t need to stretch ourselves too thin.

[Anonymous]

I totally get it, OP. I was raised by a single mom. We had an amazing relationship. She died 10 months before our first child, a son, was born. I cried so hard when I learned we were having a boy. For me it felt like the end of my relationship with my mom.

Fast forward five years later and I'm SO delighted with my boys. (We now have two.) We are every bit as close as I expected to be with a daughter. Boys love, love, love their mamas. (And vice versa!) And maybe we don't go shopping together, but I never did that with my mom anyway. We are now three generations of nature-loving hikers.

It's ok to grieve not having a daughter. These are natural feelings. Just be open to it working out pretty great with your boys.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since this is anonymous OP, I'll admit that I'm so glad I have two daughters for exactly the reasons you outlined. DH loves his parents and is a dutiful Asian son but the level of closeness and frequency of communication is nothing like his sister has with their mom. I don't even like my own mom that much but my kids spend a ton of time at her house and we're in regular communication. It's just a different type of relationship.

Same, 3 daughters 0 sons and I couldn't be happier about it.

Same here. I have two daughters and a son.
I'm thrilled to have daughters. I honestly feel sorry for my friends who only have boys (on the rare occasions that I think about gender).

That said, I've had my own very hard things to deal with. We all do. Most of us don't get everything we want in life.

I do too! And I’m secretly jealous of any family that has two girls. I have one of each.

I feel sorry for parents who have one of each. Your kids wont be as close.

np This isn't so. My MIL ( age 83 ) is very close to her big brother ( 86) so much that they are moving in the same assisted living facility!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since this is anonymous OP, I'll admit that I'm so glad I have two daughters for exactly the reasons you outlined. DH loves his parents and is a dutiful Asian son but the level of closeness and frequency of communication is nothing like his sister has with their mom. I don't even like my own mom that much but my kids spend a ton of time at her house and we're in regular communication. It's just a different type of relationship.

Same, 3 daughters 0 sons and I couldn't be happier about it.

Same here. I have two daughters and a son.
I'm thrilled to have daughters. I honestly feel sorry for my friends who only have boys (on the rare occasions that I think about gender).

That said, I've had my own very hard things to deal with. We all do. Most of us don't get everything we want in life.

I do too! And I’m secretly jealous of any family that has two girls. I have one of each.

My two boys didn’t make me want to have 3. You basically only had capacity for 2. Your point is moot.

I feel sorry for parents who have one of each. Your kids wont be as close.

I know. But it still didn’t make me want to have 3. Feeling lucky there was no need to go to 3 since we had one of each. We didn’t need to stretch ourselves too thin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I totally get it, OP. I was raised by a single mom. We had an amazing relationship. She died 10 months before our first child, a son, was born. I cried so hard when I learned we were having a boy. For me it felt like the end of my relationship with my mom.

Fast forward five years later and I'm SO delighted with my boys. (We now have two.) We are every bit as close as I expected to be with a daughter. Boys love, love, love their mamas. (And vice versa!) And maybe we don't go shopping together, but I never did that with my mom anyway. We are now three generations of nature-loving hikers.

It's ok to grieve not having a daughter. These are natural feelings. Just be open to it working out pretty great with your boys.

So your oldest is 6? Get back to us in 10 or 20 years.

[Anonymous]

I'm exactly the opposite. I was on the fence about kids, I didn't really care about the sex, DH so desperately wanted a son, I gave him two so I'm done. He told me he was willing to do IVF in Mexico if the first was a girl. Mine are older and I like it, I'm like the princess of the house. My FIL is also so much closer to my boys, his only grandsons. I can't really explain it, it's like a male pack. I'm also super super close to my brother, we spend all the holidays together and most of the vacations too. If you are not close to your opposite sex sibling, it's most likely bad parenting by your parents, who encouraged favoritism and competition between siblings.

[Anonymous]

Having boys is less stressful. No periods, attitudes, and hormonal issues. I have both but teenage girls are a mess.

[Anonymous]

Happy I have one of each but wished for 2 girls. Boys are easier but girls really are better executive functioning wise. In that way easier. Harder in terms of behavior - girls are definitely mean! Stubborn, hormonal, just a lot of stuff mentally to manage. But opportunities wise I find there's more stuff now available for girls. It's all about that feminism thing whether coding, sports, they can do dance, photography , anything and everything where as a boy it's almost limiting. I can get pants and skirts for the girls but only pants for the boys for example. In a lot of ways girls are easier but boys are very much less work. Ultimately pros abs cons exist for both genders - it becomes the personality of the kid that determines everything 😀

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should thank your lucky stars that you have 2 healthy children and stop feeling sorry for yourself.

Hi! I'm the OP. I don't feel sorry for myself at all. Where on earth did you get that idea? I love my kids. I also feel sad about never experiencing a daughter-mom relationship. Two separate, unrelated things and a completely valid feeling. Your "analysis" seems wildly simplistic and wildly judgmental, too!