tell me about an ongoing saga in your life

[Anonymous]

But please, not another I hate my MIL story. (I have my own.)

I need to get wrapped up in someone else's drama today.

[Anonymous]

lol.
I flew out to Colorado to visit family (where I'm from) with my husband and 2 small kids. I spent time with momd, dad, and 1 brother & his family and 1 sister & her family. But 1 brother and 1 sister were too busy the entire week to see me. We planned a couple meet-ups, but they canceled the first and didn't bother with the second.
Ok, we are not the closest of siblings. But seriously, I spent over $2k in expenses to fly out there to see everyone for a week, and they couldn't drive 30 minutes out of their way to have lunch? WTF?!?

[Anonymous]

So will you pursue this? Did you have words over this already? Does this behavior tick you off?

This is good... but I need more. Keep 'em coming.

[Anonymous]

Schadenfreude, much?

[Anonymous]

My mother came to "help" when DD was born 3 years ago, a week after the birth. I asked her to come so she could help me with home stuff and cooking, and to learn a few things from her about caring from DD. She basically spent the entire time watching TV and looking utterly bored until she broke down crying and saying she wanted to go home, she could not take it anymore.

I told her fine, leave, as it was stressing me out so much that we flew her out and DH could not see what she was doing to help, she would not even fix meals unless they were for her. She left and I haven't seen her in 3 years. We speak on the phone but she didn't want to come visit to see her grandchildren, now two of them.

She has always been full of drama. I have supported her financially since I was 18, sometimes working 4 jobs at a time while in school so I could pay for her expenses when my stepfather left when I was 18. I am 38 now, so it's been 20 years of me paying her rent, cell phone, clothes, travel, etc., plus emotional support through two decades of her being unsettled and depressed since my brother left home. It's been exhausting.

All is asked was one week of help from her.

She is coming to visit on July 4th weekend to finally meet the kids and is probably getting ready to lecture me about how I should have behaved differently, perhaps beg her to stay and not expect much from her since she is old and set in her ways (she just turned 60 which I don't consider old). It shall be an interesting time. I'm doing it only because of my children, I frankly have not missed her much in the past three years.

[Anonymous]

If you said "I have been supporting you for 20 years, and in return I want one week of help from you", what would her likely response be?

[Anonymous]

Silence, probably. She is not the confrontational type.

Somehow she thinks it's my duty to support her since she gave me life. She tells everyone that I support her, it's like something to be proud of in her book.

[Anonymous]

Like I said on a thread on the relationship forum, my saga is my cheating DH who is otherwise a good husband an the fact that I am done with this marriage but don't wanna leave (or tell him) because I wanna go to school first. I wanna go to school, get a job, get settled and then leave his ass. I don't wanna leave with no place to go and no support system to help me through school.

[Anonymous]

What about hating my SIL? I don't know when I'll see my brother again because I refuse to see her ever since she flipped out on a family camping trip and blamed my family for my brother's impotence. She also seems to feel like their five dogs should be treated exactly the same as we treat my son and my niece (other brother's baby). SIL doesn't have any children, only the dogs. I feel bad because I know she has problems, social anxiety disorder at the very least, though I don't know that she's ever been diagnosed with anything. She has my brother by the balls, unfortunately. I love my brother dearly and my family has never had any conflict like this before. The situation sucks, to say the least.

[Anonymous]

pp - does dh know that u know?????
wow........

[Anonymous]

About the 12:41's mother: eek, this is an interesting one.
You are a selfless daughter for supporting your mother for so long. Curious how and why you don't ask for anything in return (that she looks for work, files for unemployment, etc.) Seems perfectly reasonable that she help you out in some way if you are supporting her 100%, without so much as visiting your own kids. Again, you are quite the forgiving daughter.

[Anonymous]

13:13 - wow. Your poor brother.
And not much you can do about the SIL, I guess. Maybe it's best they don't have kids, with the lack of respect she gives him.

[Anonymous]

i had our second baby in march and quickly deteriorated into post-partum hell, as i did with my first DC, only this time i had a nervous breakdown when DD was 9 weeks old and had to go on meds. the meds had just started kicking in when an opportunity to buy our dream house fell into our lap. we jumped on it, but it isn't our style to make monumental decisions like this on such short notice, so that was stressful.

DH, apparently thinking i am on "vacation" while I'm on maternity leave, leaves me to a). find a lender who will pre-approve us for a loan without having sold our current house first (do you know how hard that is in today's market?!?), b). negotiate the deal for the house, and then c). locate and provide the Everest of documentation needed to close a loan today. All this while on antidepressants and with a newborn hanging off me, because I am "in the best position to do this" while he goes off to work every day.

Oh, and he also left me to declutter and clean our current house in preparation for sale, by myself, while caring for a newborn. Never once did he ask me how I was feeling, if I needed anything, or even give me an "attagirl" for doing all this shit, having just had a baby AND a nervous breakdown. Even the loan processor, who was in the unenviable position of having to call and ask me for bank statements, tax returns, contract addenda, credit reports, various handwritten statements, while I was clearly juggling a cranky baby, said she hopes my husband appreciates this. He doesn't. When I exhibited even the tiniest little bit of stress, he would just snap at me that "it's going to be all right, just relax" and off he'd go to scratch his ass in a corner.

I managed to get the loan on the new house approved, so we go to settlement in 2 weeks, but the old house is still not sold. More stress, and more to do.

Men are pigs.

[Anonymous]

my cheating DH who is otherwise a good husband

He's "otherwise a good husband?" So other than betraying you, being dishonest with you, sneaking around with another woman behind your back, and breaking your trust and his marriage vows, he's a good husband?

I'm really sorry. I hope you get rid of him, go to school, and things work out for you.

[Anonymous]

I am a FT working mom; bored as heck at my understimulating job, and expecting another baby. When I told my non-parent boss that I am pregnant, boss basically suggested I stay at home with the kids. I have been asking for more work for weeks, but hardly get a response - meanwhile, boss is hiring another person in our 'super busy' group.
Additionally, DH and I are looking to move house and I don't expect to return to work FT after baby and moving house.
Would love to cut hours (now or after baby comes) - don't know about suggesting my hours be cut, because I was formerly PT and was told there was too much work to continue that.