Professionally successful women intimidate me

[Anonymous]

Or rather, professionally successful moms. I taught elementary school for 5 years before staying at home with my two young children. I married a very accomplished man and we are very comfortable. He adores me for who I am, and wonders why I feel the way I do, but it's hard to explain. I feel like everyone in our circle is so very accomplished and even though I have a lot to say, have a ton of friends from college that I still love and spend time with, I still really get intimidated by the women I've met as an adult. Personally, I feel really accomplished but I didn't even like teaching so I don't like talking about it. I mean, it wasn't even admirable. At least that would be something, right? Add to that insecurity the fact that I'm young (a few weeks away from 31) and cute, and you can see why I'm a little paranoid that people think I'm just a dimwit trophy wife. I wish I was confident enough to not care, but I'm only human and want to be able to make mom friends when my oldest starts preschool. Tips on getting over it?

[Anonymous]

Read the newspaper and form an opinion.

[Anonymous]

I'd probably be considered "professionally successful" by many. A partner track law firm associate. I do regulatory work, and there's very little that I do at my job that provides for interesting conversation. In fact I think I'd have more interesting stuff to talk about if I weren't so busy at work and had more time to read books and magazines like the New Yorker. So I guess what I'm saying is that these women probably want to talk about the same type of stuff you do (i.e., not the mundane details of their jobs).

[Anonymous]

What is your definition of accomplished?

I think a lot of women who come across as 'accomplished' are just posturing - you have no idea how they feel about themselves at the end of the day. They might feel exactly like you!

Throughout the day, I usually see at least one other mom who seems to have her shit together SO MUCH MORE than I do and for a minute I think 'well, shit - look at me' but I have a good, happy life so after a few minutes I revert back to that thought. My only tip is to realize that you have no idea how unhappy and insecure these women might actually be so don't be so hard on yourself.

[Anonymous]

At 31, you might want to consider toning down the "cute" ... it's not such an attractive quality in a woman over 30 who wants people to take her seriously.

At your age, you no longer look "cute", its just how you are portraying yourself more like "cutesy" and this is why you feel intimidated.

[Anonymous]

For PP, I am a new PP and interested in how to tone down the "cute" or "cutesy." I am a 35 year old "cutie" and just can't help it. I look very young for my age. I have a mix of sophisticated and casual/"cute" clothes, but when it comes down to it, my facial features are quite young.

Glasses?
Short mom haircut?
Scowl?

Tell me how to lose the cute so that others take me seriously.

[Anonymous]

Just.be.yourself.

[Anonymous]

Agree with earlier poster that you should read and form an opinion. Stay up on current events. Rarely talk about your children. Clueless why you think teaching isn't admirable. Stop with the cute and the question marks. And please don't continually apologize.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At 31, you might want to consider toning down the "cute" ... it's not such an attractive quality in a woman over 30 who wants people to take her seriously.

At your age, you no longer look "cute", its just how you are portraying yourself more like "cutesy" and this is why you feel intimidated.

Said by an ugly old wench! Whats wrong with you pp? There is nothing wrong with being cute. Maybe you should try it and not be such a bitch. Im sure you would be more likable.

[Anonymous]

Talking about how cute you are, even on an anonymous forum = obnoxious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For PP, I am a new PP and interested in how to tone down the "cute" or "cutesy." I am a 35 year old "cutie" and just can't help it. I look very young for my age. I have a mix of sophisticated and casual/"cute" clothes, but when it comes down to it, my facial features are quite young.

Glasses?
Short mom haircut?
Scowl?

Tell me how to lose the cute so that others take me seriously.

Maybe you should tone down the "smug bitch" first.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I just said cute because I thought if I said pretty you might pounce on me. I'm attractive, and I don't act cutesy. And I think teaching is admirable, I just didn't really like it and wasn't good at it. THAT isn't admirable. I do read up on current events, I have opinions...I wasn't really asking about how to make women like me, I was asking for advice on getting over my hangups.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I just said cute because I thought if I said pretty you might pounce on me. I'm attractive, and I don't act cutesy. And I think teaching is admirable, I just didn't really like it and wasn't good at it. THAT isn't admirable. I do read up on current events, I have opinions...I wasn't really asking about how to make women like me, I was asking for advice on getting over my hangups.

OP if you say cute, pretty, skinny, whatever, the nasties of DCUM will come at you because most of them are old ogres who can only dream of being cute young or old.

I think you are getting way to hung up on what "other" women think and they might be insecure as well. Just be yourself and thats what matters! You sound like you are CUTE and normal so just be yourself!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At 31, you might want to consider toning down the "cute" ... it's not such an attractive quality in a woman over 30 who wants people to take her seriously.

At your age, you no longer look "cute", its just how you are portraying yourself more like "cutesy" and this is why you feel intimidated.

Said by an ugly old wench! Whats wrong with you pp? There is nothing wrong with being cute. Maybe you should try it and not be such a bitch. Im sure you would be more likable.

You realize that "cute" on a woman over 30 really is just the polite, social way of saying a woman isn't attractive. It's not a compliment anymore at that age. Its a negative description with a positive spin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At 31, you might want to consider toning down the "cute" ... it's not such an attractive quality in a woman over 30 who wants people to take her seriously.

At your age, you no longer look "cute", its just how you are portraying yourself more like "cutesy" and this is why you feel intimidated.

Said by an ugly old wench! Whats wrong with you pp? There is nothing wrong with being cute. Maybe you should try it and not be such a bitch. Im sure you would be more likable.

You realize that "cute" on a woman over 30 really is just the polite, social way of saying a woman isn't attractive. It's not a compliment anymore at that age. Its a negative description with a positive spin.

You do realize that you are a jealous bitch right?