Is this appropriate for the community pool?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would think it's inappropriate for a family pool. Like a PP said, just kids, dads and moms there. And in none of those cases is it appropriate for you to walk around in front of them with your butt hanging out of your suit.

+1 A family pool? Nope. It would cause a problem at our country club pool. I don't think the board would do anything but I do think there would be some social ostracization occurring because OP was wearing it at a family pool.

Family pool? Only if you don't care that some will be talking about you. Resort? Sure. Vacation, yes. Right or wrong, most moms want to look like moms at community pools, not like the "hot mom" that everyone talks about. And if you want to be the hot mom then you better be hot.

God, the internalized misogyny is so depressing.

NP. I don’t have a problem with it but the feminist in me is wondering why women’s bathing suits expose so much, compared to men’s? It just seems expected that we show most of our butts and boobs (and have perfectly flat abs if we’re going to expose them) but men are swimming in shorts literally down to their knees (many with guts). With the exception of rash guards, women’s suits are getting smaller and men’s suits are getting longer. It’s strange, isn’t it?

x1000

Does anyone really want to see men’s junk on display?

I don't. I also don't want to see your junk on display. Keep it covered, please. I know you have a tushie and boobies. I do, too. I don't need to see yours and you don't need to see mine. Have some self-respect.

Anyone who is wearing a bathing suit is covering their “tushie and boobies”, as you so childishly put it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the deal with all your pools?? I am fit, wear bikinis, not thongs, not string bikinis, but normal ones, and nobody has ever made me feel like I’m walking about being judged and gossiped about at my pool. No idea if “the other dads” stare, doubt they do, but am I trying to seduce them or attract them? Uh, no. Most of your husbands are pale and flabby with Marvel trunks and ugly flip flops on. I am not interested. I hate this forum so much lately. It’s just constantly shaming other women for choices they make- Botox, bathing suits, jeans, makeup. Depressing to see how little all of you think of other women. And most of it is in your head.

Agree. How are adult women still hung up on bathing suits being operationally equivalent to underwear. True enough, but we do this so that we can swim, and we treat everyone else who's forced to do this with the benign neglect we expect to receive. All the more so at the community pool where it's only about the kids. To flip this social contract and shame everyone into wearing a wall of fabric is retrograde. I didn't like you gals when you wore pants under your skirts to use the playground equipment, and I can't believe after all these years you haven't progressed beyond your I see London phase. (If all you see is a covering, I've done my job.)

This forum has been awful lately. There an entire chorus that needs each topic answered as if they've dropped in from outerspace...

Wait -- are you saying you didn't like other children because they wore tumbling shorts under their skirts? Really? I don't ever remember wearing a skirt to the playground as a kid -- girls just didn't really do that in the 70s, skirts were for church and grandma's sunday dinner...but I cannot imagine liking or disliking another child based on whether they wore shorts under their skirts. And you're complaining about women being judgmental?

I think the point is, how many layers of fabric do you need between your vagina and the outside world to be considered appropriate? When you wear a skirt, the underwear covers your vagina. Now you’re telling me you need to cover the underwear, so no one can see that as well? Really, why? Because it’s touching your genitals?

I don’t care how many layers of fabric you have between your vagina and the outside world (although at least one is appreciated), but I strongly object to the idea that girls or women are going to judge other girls and women who choose to have more than one layer or choose to wear something a little less revealing. Boys are allowed to wear shorts on the playground equipment—why can’t girls? And if they want to put a skirt on over it so they have a little flounce, what is that something you have a problem with?
I wear swim shorts usually to the pool so I don’t have to shave my crotch or upper thighs so often. Men never shave their crotch—I’m not sure why we do. I’m happy with my choice but it sounds like you wouldn’t like me because of it. That seems like a weird decision, especially for someone who is complaining about women judging other women.

I'm the PP who mentioned "I see London" and you are really reaching if you think I judge women who cover up, that is not what I said. What I found annoying in preschool, was there was a certain sort who went out of their way to point out any sliver of underwear, you know the rhyme. And this thread is the grown up equivalent. OP owns the swimsuit, she must like it, why can't she wear it around children? How is that an affront to women who like wearing shorts and rash guards? It isn't. You're imagining this judgement. Personally I love the cheeky suits, they're flattering and it don't require shaving, the way hi-cuts or other front configurations may. I look terrible in lycra shorts, plus they can be chilly if it takes longer to dry off. But you do you.

lol you specifically said you did not like other girls who wore shorts under their skirts. When I was that age I liked to wear skirts and I also wanted to play. So my mom put me in a skirt with shorts underneath so I could enjoy myself without showing my underwear to everyone. Sorry your mom didn’t take care of you in the same way as a young girl. That must have been embarrassing and difficult. FYI, in case your mom didn’t teach you about slips, you may want to get up to speed. I bet you’re walking around in see through dresses and don’t even know it.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s fine. Those who are bothered can invest in a private pool if they wish to not be exposed to what others are wearing.

[Anonymous]

If you are fat/not in shape it would be disgusting. If your butt is firm/not covered in cellulite like most moms you can wear it. Most women cannot pull that cut off over the age of 25 or so....maybe 30.
If you do not have abs that is a non starter to wear that swimsuit- you need both sides working for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are fat/not in shape it would be disgusting. If your butt is firm/not covered in cellulite like most moms you can wear it. Most women cannot pull that cut off over the age of 25 or so....maybe 30.
If you do not have abs that is a non starter to wear that swimsuit- you need both sides working for you.

Nah. You don’t. If you’re fat and want to wear a bathing suit, wear it. Skinny, no curves? Wear it. Everyone is too busy worrying about their own body issues as we can see here. They’re actually not paying much attention to you at all so wear what you feel good in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would think it's inappropriate for a family pool. Like a PP said, just kids, dads and moms there. And in none of those cases is it appropriate for you to walk around in front of them with your butt hanging out of your suit.

+1 A family pool? Nope. It would cause a problem at our country club pool. I don't think the board would do anything but I do think there would be some social ostracization occurring because OP was wearing it at a family pool.

Family pool? Only if you don't care that some will be talking about you. Resort? Sure. Vacation, yes. Right or wrong, most moms want to look like moms at community pools, not like the "hot mom" that everyone talks about. And if you want to be the hot mom then you better be hot.

God, the internalized misogyny is so depressing.

NP. I don’t have a problem with it but the feminist in me is wondering why women’s bathing suits expose so much, compared to men’s? It just seems expected that we show most of our butts and boobs (and have perfectly flat abs if we’re going to expose them) but men are swimming in shorts literally down to their knees (many with guts). With the exception of rash guards, women’s suits are getting smaller and men’s suits are getting longer. It’s strange, isn’t it?

Yes I feel exactly the same way. I loved being pregnant last summer because I felt like I could get away with being more covered up (swim skirt etc) without being judged as a grump. I hate all the waxing etc that has to go into revealing bathing suit styles that are the norm.

I totally agree. I think people should wear what they want but as an adult I’ve come to find it strange that at the pool it’s basically the norm to walk around in the equivalent of a bra and underwear. I mean, I wouldn’t strip down to that going to the grocery store so it feels especially weird at the community pool with the neighbors.

[Anonymous]

I’m from Los Angeles. I’m not getting overly sexy vibes from that suit. At all. But I agree women here are super modest at the community pool. Tankinis and skirt bottoms are very common.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think this is inappropriate. I wouldn’t bat an eye if I saw you wearing this. If you are unsure and don’t want to stick out bring a cover up and get a sense of what other people are wearing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are fat/not in shape it would be disgusting. If your butt is firm/not covered in cellulite like most moms you can wear it. Most women cannot pull that cut off over the age of 25 or so....maybe 30.
If you do not have abs that is a non starter to wear that swimsuit- you need both sides working for you.

Nah. You don’t. If you’re fat and want to wear a bathing suit, wear it. Skinny, no curves? Wear it. Everyone is too busy worrying about their own body issues as we can see here. They’re actually not paying much attention to you at all so wear what you feel good in.

Most people would not agree with you. You can’t wear a two piece if you are over 25 and don’t have abs? Please. I agree with the other poster that mentioned misogyny on this thread. It is rampant in these responses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the deal with all your pools?? I am fit, wear bikinis, not thongs, not string bikinis, but normal ones, and nobody has ever made me feel like I’m walking about being judged and gossiped about at my pool. No idea if “the other dads” stare, doubt they do, but am I trying to seduce them or attract them? Uh, no. Most of your husbands are pale and flabby with Marvel trunks and ugly flip flops on. I am not interested. I hate this forum so much lately. It’s just constantly shaming other women for choices they make- Botox, bathing suits, jeans, makeup. Depressing to see how little all of you think of other women. And most of it is in your head.

Agree. How are adult women still hung up on bathing suits being operationally equivalent to underwear. True enough, but we do this so that we can swim, and we treat everyone else who's forced to do this with the benign neglect we expect to receive. All the more so at the community pool where it's only about the kids. To flip this social contract and shame everyone into wearing a wall of fabric is retrograde. I didn't like you gals when you wore pants under your skirts to use the playground equipment, and I can't believe after all these years you haven't progressed beyond your I see London phase. (If all you see is a covering, I've done my job.)

This forum has been awful lately. There an entire chorus that needs each topic answered as if they've dropped in from outerspace...

Wait -- are you saying you didn't like other children because they wore tumbling shorts under their skirts? Really? I don't ever remember wearing a skirt to the playground as a kid -- girls just didn't really do that in the 70s, skirts were for church and grandma's sunday dinner...but I cannot imagine liking or disliking another child based on whether they wore shorts under their skirts. And you're complaining about women being judgmental?

I think the point is, how many layers of fabric do you need between your vagina and the outside world to be considered appropriate? When you wear a skirt, the underwear covers your vagina. Now you’re telling me you need to cover the underwear, so no one can see that as well? Really, why? Because it’s touching your genitals?

I don’t care how many layers of fabric you have between your vagina and the outside world (although at least one is appreciated), but I strongly object to the idea that girls or women are going to judge other girls and women who choose to have more than one layer or choose to wear something a little less revealing. Boys are allowed to wear shorts on the playground equipment—why can’t girls? And if they want to put a skirt on over it so they have a little flounce, what is that something you have a problem with?
I wear swim shorts usually to the pool so I don’t have to shave my crotch or upper thighs so often. Men never shave their crotch—I’m not sure why we do. I’m happy with my choice but it sounds like you wouldn’t like me because of it. That seems like a weird decision, especially for someone who is complaining about women judging other women.

I'm the PP who mentioned "I see London" and you are really reaching if you think I judge women who cover up, that is not what I said. What I found annoying in preschool, was there was a certain sort who went out of their way to point out any sliver of underwear, you know the rhyme. And this thread is the grown up equivalent. OP owns the swimsuit, she must like it, why can't she wear it around children? How is that an affront to women who like wearing shorts and rash guards? It isn't. You're imagining this judgement. Personally I love the cheeky suits, they're flattering and it don't require shaving, the way hi-cuts or other front configurations may. I look terrible in lycra shorts, plus they can be chilly if it takes longer to dry off. But you do you.

lol you specifically said you did not like other girls who wore shorts under their skirts. When I was that age I liked to wear skirts and I also wanted to play. So my mom put me in a skirt with shorts underneath so I could enjoy myself without showing my underwear to everyone. Sorry your mom didn’t take care of you in the same way as a young girl. That must have been embarrassing and difficult. FYI, in case your mom didn’t teach you about slips, you may want to get up to speed. I bet you’re walking around in see through dresses and don’t even know it.

Wow the truth comes out, hope you didn’t land on your head too many times attempting cherry bombs in skirt, pants and a slip. Surely your mother didn’t let anyone glimpse the outline of your slacks through a skirt in full sun. Do you make your kids wear three swimsuits? I’m now convinced you were insufferable on the playground.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are fat/not in shape it would be disgusting. If your butt is firm/not covered in cellulite like most moms you can wear it. Most women cannot pull that cut off over the age of 25 or so....maybe 30.
If you do not have abs that is a non starter to wear that swimsuit- you need both sides working for you.

Nah. You don’t. If you’re fat and want to wear a bathing suit, wear it. Skinny, no curves? Wear it. Everyone is too busy worrying about their own body issues as we can see here. They’re actually not paying much attention to you at all so wear what you feel good in.

Most people would not agree with you. You can’t wear a two piece if you are over 25 and don’t have abs? Please. I agree with the other poster that mentioned misogyny on this thread. It is rampant in these responses.

You do realize that the t-shirts and term “no fat chicks” was not some giant conspiracy created by some secret fraternity?
Live in your bubble where most men really enjoy fat women in bikinis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the deal with all your pools?? I am fit, wear bikinis, not thongs, not string bikinis, but normal ones, and nobody has ever made me feel like I’m walking about being judged and gossiped about at my pool. No idea if “the other dads” stare, doubt they do, but am I trying to seduce them or attract them? Uh, no. Most of your husbands are pale and flabby with Marvel trunks and ugly flip flops on. I am not interested. I hate this forum so much lately. It’s just constantly shaming other women for choices they make- Botox, bathing suits, jeans, makeup. Depressing to see how little all of you think of other women. And most of it is in your head.

Agree. How are adult women still hung up on bathing suits being operationally equivalent to underwear. True enough, but we do this so that we can swim, and we treat everyone else who's forced to do this with the benign neglect we expect to receive. All the more so at the community pool where it's only about the kids. To flip this social contract and shame everyone into wearing a wall of fabric is retrograde. I didn't like you gals when you wore pants under your skirts to use the playground equipment, and I can't believe after all these years you haven't progressed beyond your I see London phase. (If all you see is a covering, I've done my job.)

This forum has been awful lately. There an entire chorus that needs each topic answered as if they've dropped in from outerspace...

Wait -- are you saying you didn't like other children because they wore tumbling shorts under their skirts? Really? I don't ever remember wearing a skirt to the playground as a kid -- girls just didn't really do that in the 70s, skirts were for church and grandma's sunday dinner...but I cannot imagine liking or disliking another child based on whether they wore shorts under their skirts. And you're complaining about women being judgmental?

I think the point is, how many layers of fabric do you need between your vagina and the outside world to be considered appropriate? When you wear a skirt, the underwear covers your vagina. Now you’re telling me you need to cover the underwear, so no one can see that as well? Really, why? Because it’s touching your genitals?

I don’t care how many layers of fabric you have between your vagina and the outside world (although at least one is appreciated), but I strongly object to the idea that girls or women are going to judge other girls and women who choose to have more than one layer or choose to wear something a little less revealing. Boys are allowed to wear shorts on the playground equipment—why can’t girls? And if they want to put a skirt on over it so they have a little flounce, what is that something you have a problem with?
I wear swim shorts usually to the pool so I don’t have to shave my crotch or upper thighs so often. Men never shave their crotch—I’m not sure why we do. I’m happy with my choice but it sounds like you wouldn’t like me because of it. That seems like a weird decision, especially for someone who is complaining about women judging other women.

I'm the PP who mentioned "I see London" and you are really reaching if you think I judge women who cover up, that is not what I said. What I found annoying in preschool, was there was a certain sort who went out of their way to point out any sliver of underwear, you know the rhyme. And this thread is the grown up equivalent. OP owns the swimsuit, she must like it, why can't she wear it around children? How is that an affront to women who like wearing shorts and rash guards? It isn't. You're imagining this judgement. Personally I love the cheeky suits, they're flattering and it don't require shaving, the way hi-cuts or other front configurations may. I look terrible in lycra shorts, plus they can be chilly if it takes longer to dry off. But you do you.

lol you specifically said you did not like other girls who wore shorts under their skirts. When I was that age I liked to wear skirts and I also wanted to play. So my mom put me in a skirt with shorts underneath so I could enjoy myself without showing my underwear to everyone. Sorry your mom didn’t take care of you in the same way as a young girl. That must have been embarrassing and difficult. FYI, in case your mom didn’t teach you about slips, you may want to get up to speed. I bet you’re walking around in see through dresses and don’t even know it.

Wow the truth comes out, hope you didn’t land on your head too many times attempting cherry bombs in skirt, pants and a slip. Surely your mother didn’t let anyone glimpse the outline of your slacks through a skirt in full sun. Do you make your kids wear three swimsuits? I’m now convinced you were insufferable on the playground.

A skirt with bike shorts under is hardly a skirt with "slacks". It's like the child equivalent of wearing leggings under a tunic. I had a great time as a kid in skirts and with bike shorts underneath, and no one ever sang "I see london, I see france..." to me. Sorry you either did not have a mother, or your mother didn't love you/was neglectful, but this is a super normal thing for moms to do for their young girls. My kids wear one appropriate swimsuit, and I wear a slip so no one can see through my dress. Again, I suggest you take stock of your wardrobe, because I'm pretty sure you're Doing It Wrong. I feel so bad for you also. I literally had not thought of "I see london..." in years until this post. I imagine kids sang that a lot to you, because you flashed your undies around.

PS. The bathing suit from the original post seems just fine to me for the community pool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would think it's inappropriate for a family pool. Like a PP said, just kids, dads and moms there. And in none of those cases is it appropriate for you to walk around in front of them with your butt hanging out of your suit.

+1 A family pool? Nope. It would cause a problem at our country club pool. I don't think the board would do anything but I do think there would be some social ostracization occurring because OP was wearing it at a family pool.

Family pool? Only if you don't care that some will be talking about you. Resort? Sure. Vacation, yes. Right or wrong, most moms want to look like moms at community pools, not like the "hot mom" that everyone talks about. And if you want to be the hot mom then you better be hot.

God, the internalized misogyny is so depressing.

NP. I don’t have a problem with it but the feminist in me is wondering why women’s bathing suits expose so much, compared to men’s? It just seems expected that we show most of our butts and boobs (and have perfectly flat abs if we’re going to expose them) but men are swimming in shorts literally down to their knees (many with guts). With the exception of rash guards, women’s suits are getting smaller and men’s suits are getting longer. It’s strange, isn’t it?

x1000

X2000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the deal with all your pools?? I am fit, wear bikinis, not thongs, not string bikinis, but normal ones, and nobody has ever made me feel like I’m walking about being judged and gossiped about at my pool. No idea if “the other dads” stare, doubt they do, but am I trying to seduce them or attract them? Uh, no. Most of your husbands are pale and flabby with Marvel trunks and ugly flip flops on. I am not interested. I hate this forum so much lately. It’s just constantly shaming other women for choices they make- Botox, bathing suits, jeans, makeup. Depressing to see how little all of you think of other women. And most of it is in your head.

Agree. How are adult women still hung up on bathing suits being operationally equivalent to underwear. True enough, but we do this so that we can swim, and we treat everyone else who's forced to do this with the benign neglect we expect to receive. All the more so at the community pool where it's only about the kids. To flip this social contract and shame everyone into wearing a wall of fabric is retrograde. I didn't like you gals when you wore pants under your skirts to use the playground equipment, and I can't believe after all these years you haven't progressed beyond your I see London phase. (If all you see is a covering, I've done my job.)

This forum has been awful lately. There an entire chorus that needs each topic answered as if they've dropped in from outerspace...

Wait -- are you saying you didn't like other children because they wore tumbling shorts under their skirts? Really? I don't ever remember wearing a skirt to the playground as a kid -- girls just didn't really do that in the 70s, skirts were for church and grandma's sunday dinner...but I cannot imagine liking or disliking another child based on whether they wore shorts under their skirts. And you're complaining about women being judgmental?

I think the point is, how many layers of fabric do you need between your vagina and the outside world to be considered appropriate? When you wear a skirt, the underwear covers your vagina. Now you’re telling me you need to cover the underwear, so no one can see that as well? Really, why? Because it’s touching your genitals?

I don’t care how many layers of fabric you have between your vagina and the outside world (although at least one is appreciated), but I strongly object to the idea that girls or women are going to judge other girls and women who choose to have more than one layer or choose to wear something a little less revealing. Boys are allowed to wear shorts on the playground equipment—why can’t girls? And if they want to put a skirt on over it so they have a little flounce, what is that something you have a problem with?
I wear swim shorts usually to the pool so I don’t have to shave my crotch or upper thighs so often. Men never shave their crotch—I’m not sure why we do. I’m happy with my choice but it sounds like you wouldn’t like me because of it. That seems like a weird decision, especially for someone who is complaining about women judging other women.

I'm the PP who mentioned "I see London" and you are really reaching if you think I judge women who cover up, that is not what I said. What I found annoying in preschool, was there was a certain sort who went out of their way to point out any sliver of underwear, you know the rhyme. And this thread is the grown up equivalent. OP owns the swimsuit, she must like it, why can't she wear it around children? How is that an affront to women who like wearing shorts and rash guards? It isn't. You're imagining this judgement. Personally I love the cheeky suits, they're flattering and it don't require shaving, the way hi-cuts or other front configurations may. I look terrible in lycra shorts, plus they can be chilly if it takes longer to dry off. But you do you.

lol you specifically said you did not like other girls who wore shorts under their skirts. When I was that age I liked to wear skirts and I also wanted to play. So my mom put me in a skirt with shorts underneath so I could enjoy myself without showing my underwear to everyone. Sorry your mom didn’t take care of you in the same way as a young girl. That must have been embarrassing and difficult. FYI, in case your mom didn’t teach you about slips, you may want to get up to speed. I bet you’re walking around in see through dresses and don’t even know it.

Wow the truth comes out, hope you didn’t land on your head too many times attempting cherry bombs in skirt, pants and a slip. Surely your mother didn’t let anyone glimpse the outline of your slacks through a skirt in full sun. Do you make your kids wear three swimsuits? I’m now convinced you were insufferable on the playground.

There’s at least two different women responding to you that were taken aback by you that as a child you didn’t like little girls who wore shorts under their skirts. I’m a little stunned you haven’t backed off that statement. I’m still hoping you just mis-spoke and that there are not little girls who make playground friends based on that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are fat/not in shape it would be disgusting. If your butt is firm/not covered in cellulite like most moms you can wear it. Most women cannot pull that cut off over the age of 25 or so....maybe 30.
If you do not have abs that is a non starter to wear that swimsuit- you need both sides working for you.

Nah. You don’t. If you’re fat and want to wear a bathing suit, wear it. Skinny, no curves? Wear it. Everyone is too busy worrying about their own body issues as we can see here. They’re actually not paying much attention to you at all so wear what you feel good in.

Most people would not agree with you. You can’t wear a two piece if you are over 25 and don’t have abs? Please. I agree with the other poster that mentioned misogyny on this thread. It is rampant in these responses.

You do realize that the t-shirts and term “no fat chicks” was not some giant conspiracy created by some secret fraternity?
Live in your bubble where most men really enjoy fat women in bikinis.

I’ve literally never seen this t shirt or heard anyone say that. I wonder what type of people you hang around with.