Why are some woman okay with being “the other woman”?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^ That’s when the cheater says “I don’t know what gave you that impression,” “I never promised you anything,” or “I have different needs now.”

My favorite cheater “love mantras” are “I have needs” and “You are a wonderful person to spend time with.” Those are code for “I’m a selfish prick” and “It’s so amusing manipulating you into buying my bs.”

So you have had a lot of affairs ? And 99% of the time the affair started for “fun” and she read way more into things in her affair fog.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^ That’s when the cheater says “I don’t know what gave you that impression,” “I never promised you anything,” or “I have different needs now.”

My favorite cheater “love mantras” are “I have needs” and “You are a wonderful person to spend time with.” Those are code for “I’m a selfish prick” and “It’s so amusing manipulating you into buying my bs.”

So you have had a lot of affairs ? And 99% of the time the affair started for “fun” and she read way more into things in her affair fog.

The guy is married (and often she is too). Who are these people that expect a LIAR to be truthful ??? Wtf? A cheater is by definition, first and foremost, a LIAR. A million lies are required to have sex with you. Of course everything he tells you is a lie. Duh

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:AP? So cute that spurned wives have their own jargon.

You late. AP has been a term for years. Are you new to the internets??

[Anonymous]

Some of the wives on this site need to heal. Clearly they've been cheated on, I was too. I'm divorced. One thing I know for sure is that insulting the AP's in the bunch won't change their minds. It won't change the minds of the women who sleep with your husbands either. So go somewhere and get over that hurt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Money. They are not independent. Lifestyle.

Their husbands don’t f@ck them and they want another woman’s lifestyle. Jealousy. They are looking for an upgrade and too lazy and dumb to get a job to get that upgrade on their own.

99% of them don’t work. If they do, it’s a crap @ss menial job. They try to get somewhere with what’s between their legs but too f@cking stupid and unattractive to get a single man so they bang one that lads them on and will never leave for them.
It’s as simple as that.

Bless your little broken heart.

I’m an AP. I’m married, more highly educated than his wife, and have a job that would generally be perceived as much more prestigious. And I am wealthier than he is. He simply found a better match to spend his life with, as did I. Just waiting for kids to head to college and to give them time to settle in before leaving spouses. Otherwise would be too much disruption in the four straight years that our respective kids are going through college application stress and graduating. Oh, and both of our spouses cheated in the past. We feel no guilt. Just waiting it out.

Check back in here on four years and let us know how “just waiting till the kids graduate from high school” goes for you. One cheater guy in this thread referred to that ploy as “kicking the can down the road.” It shouldn’t surprise you but: cheaters also are liars too.

Once he’s free and kids are gone he will do much better and younger than this Ho. They don’t want an old cheater when they are finally free. Definitely luck the can down the road and tell her all of those lies to keep the side sex going until divorce.

Okay, the AP poster here is trash, but so is the married man she's cheating with. It sounds a bit like you think he deserves to come out of this better off than before and she deserves the worst. Tale as old as time. They're both married. They're equally terrible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Money. They are not independent. Lifestyle.

Their husbands don’t f@ck them and they want another woman’s lifestyle. Jealousy. They are looking for an upgrade and too lazy and dumb to get a job to get that upgrade on their own.

99% of them don’t work. If they do, it’s a crap @ss menial job. They try to get somewhere with what’s between their legs but too f@cking stupid and unattractive to get a single man so they bang one that lads them on and will never leave for them.
It’s as simple as that.

Bless your little broken heart.

I’m an AP. I’m married, more highly educated than his wife, and have a job that would generally be perceived as much more prestigious. And I am wealthier than he is. He simply found a better match to spend his life with, as did I. Just waiting for kids to head to college and to give them time to settle in before leaving spouses. Otherwise would be too much disruption in the four straight years that our respective kids are going through college application stress and graduating. Oh, and both of our spouses cheated in the past. We feel no guilt. Just waiting it out.

Check back in here on four years and let us know how “just waiting till the kids graduate from high school” goes for you. One cheater guy in this thread referred to that ploy as “kicking the can down the road.” It shouldn’t surprise you but: cheaters also are liars too.

Once he’s free and kids are gone he will do much better and younger than this Ho. They don’t want an old cheater when they are finally free. Definitely luck the can down the road and tell her all of those lies to keep the side sex going until divorce.

Okay, the AP poster here is trash, but so is the married man she's cheating with. It sounds a bit like you think he deserves to come out of this better off than before and she deserves the worst. Tale as old as time. They're both married. They're equally terrible.

Nope. Nobody said either is good—-just that the women are in this fantasy world where they think this will turn into a new husband and be the parachute out of their existing marriages (less than 2% of the time that happens) and the men if they finally divorce still dump them and go after a prettier/younger non-cheater. Story as old as time. It’s just about sex for them. While married they will lie, lie and lie some more and sometimes just lies of omission while the OW is dreaming of a second marriage with him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AP? So cute that spurned wives have their own jargon.

You late. AP has been a term for years. Are you new to the internets??

Well they object to “whore”. Affair partner is better than ‘other woman’ which is just dumb and doesn’t take into account sometimes the other person is the same gender .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Money. They are not independent. Lifestyle.

Their husbands don’t f@ck them and they want another woman’s lifestyle. Jealousy. They are looking for an upgrade and too lazy and dumb to get a job to get that upgrade on their own.

99% of them don’t work. If they do, it’s a crap @ss menial job. They try to get somewhere with what’s between their legs but too f@cking stupid and unattractive to get a single man so they bang one that lads them on and will never leave for them.
It’s as simple as that.

Bless your little broken heart.

I’m an AP. I’m married, more highly educated than his wife, and have a job that would generally be perceived as much more prestigious. And I am wealthier than he is. He simply found a better match to spend his life with, as did I. Just waiting for kids to head to college and to give them time to settle in before leaving spouses. Otherwise would be too much disruption in the four straight years that our respective kids are going through college application stress and graduating. Oh, and both of our spouses cheated in the past. We feel no guilt. Just waiting it out.

Check back in here on four years and let us know how “just waiting till the kids graduate from high school” goes for you. One cheater guy in this thread referred to that ploy as “kicking the can down the road.” It shouldn’t surprise you but: cheaters also are liars too.

Once he’s free and kids are gone he will do much better and younger than this Ho. They don’t want an old cheater when they are finally free. Definitely luck the can down the road and tell her all of those lies to keep the side sex going until divorce.

Okay, the AP poster here is trash, but so is the married man she's cheating with. It sounds a bit like you think he deserves to come out of this better off than before and she deserves the worst. Tale as old as time. They're both married. They're equally terrible.

Nope. Nobody said either is good—-just that the women are in this fantasy world where they think this will turn into a new husband and be the parachute out of their existing marriages (less than 2% of the time that happens) and the men if they finally divorce still dump them and go after a prettier/younger non-cheater. Story as old as time. It’s just about sex for them. While married they will lie, lie and lie some more and sometimes just lies of omission while the OW is dreaming of a second marriage with him.

And yet statistically men want to remarry far more than women do.

You very clearly have contempt for the woman in this scenario that you do not have for the man. She's a too old and not pretty enough cheater. He's just a man doing what men do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All of the benefits and none of the hassle. What's so hard to understand?

But I love the page after page of bitter women trying to project their failed marriages onto women without a care.

I hope you enjoy the arithmetic of the betrayed: I effed DH 12 times a month, the other ho did him 1.5 hours every six weeks, and he bought ME everything I’d bookmarked at Nordstrom during the big sale because we are soulmates and the ho didn’t! It’s hard to carry the one at times.

NP but this is so incredibly unhinged. Nordstrom sale goods are your metric of... what exactly? Your husband's love? Compared to his love of the OW who didn't get some leggings and costume jewelry?

This whole thread is a train wreck of women who need to get some self respect. It was wrong for your DH to cheat on you, but you're doing yourself dirty by being this obsessive, fixated, and toxic towards the losers who wronged you. He's a loser, OW is a loser, so what? Move on, find some joy, reclaim your life. Calling OWs names on a message board will never bring you closure and all this hate will eat you alive.

[Anonymous]

^^ DP. Pretty sure that post about the “arithmetic if the betrayed” is sarcasm to support her point in relying to the PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Money. They are not independent. Lifestyle.

Their husbands don’t f@ck them and they want another woman’s lifestyle. Jealousy. They are looking for an upgrade and too lazy and dumb to get a job to get that upgrade on their own.

99% of them don’t work. If they do, it’s a crap @ss menial job. They try to get somewhere with what’s between their legs but too f@cking stupid and unattractive to get a single man so they bang one that lads them on and will never leave for them.
It’s as simple as that.

Bless your little broken heart.

I’m an AP. I’m married, more highly educated than his wife, and have a job that would generally be perceived as much more prestigious. And I am wealthier than he is. He simply found a better match to spend his life with, as did I. Just waiting for kids to head to college and to give them time to settle in before leaving spouses. Otherwise would be too much disruption in the four straight years that our respective kids are going through college application stress and graduating. Oh, and both of our spouses cheated in the past. We feel no guilt. Just waiting it out.

Check back in here on four years and let us know how “just waiting till the kids graduate from high school” goes for you. One cheater guy in this thread referred to that ploy as “kicking the can down the road.” It shouldn’t surprise you but: cheaters also are liars too.

Once he’s free and kids are gone he will do much better and younger than this Ho. They don’t want an old cheater when they are finally free. Definitely luck the can down the road and tell her all of those lies to keep the side sex going until divorce.

Okay, the AP poster here is trash, but so is the married man she's cheating with. It sounds a bit like you think he deserves to come out of this better off than before and she deserves the worst. Tale as old as time. They're both married. They're equally terrible.

Nope. Nobody said either is good—-just that the women are in this fantasy world where they think this will turn into a new husband and be the parachute out of their existing marriages (less than 2% of the time that happens) and the men if they finally divorce still dump them and go after a prettier/younger non-cheater. Story as old as time. It’s just about sex for them. While married they will lie, lie and lie some more and sometimes just lies of omission while the OW is dreaming of a second marriage with him.

And yet statistically men want to remarry far more than women do.

You very clearly have contempt for the woman in this scenario that you do not have for the man. She's a too old and not pretty enough cheater. He's just a man doing what men do.

But it’s very rarely the AP that they remarry...and they cheat again on the next wife eventually anyways.

[Anonymous]

Answering the subject line: Low self-esteem and/or mental illness. Some of these women have always gone after men in relationships. The psychology of pining after a man that sleeps with and is committed to another women is pathological. They aren’t healthy enough for a man that is available. Imagine knowing he goes home to his wife and family and can only communicate in code or see you in the dark one or two times a month and never a holiday or his birthday, or even yours. Something is psychologically wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Answering the subject line: Low self-esteem and/or mental illness. Some of these women have always gone after men in relationships. The psychology of pining after a man that sleeps with and is committed to another women is pathological. They aren’t healthy enough for a man that is available. Imagine knowing he goes home to his wife and family and can only communicate in code or see you in the dark one or two times a month and never a holiday or his birthday, or even yours. Something is psychologically wrong.

It doesn’t seem that the OW aspires to be an OW. It seems she sees what the married couple has — home, kids, social life — and she wants it for herself (or at least the man for herself). She sees the man’s life and she either wants to plug-and-play herself into that ready-made life, or insert him as ravishing addition to her life. Not matter what it’s pure fiction, and agree it’s pathological.

Meanwhile, they guy’s just in it for sex and an ego boost.

[Anonymous]

Both the cheaters and the other women/men have mental health problems. Usually a trauma creates this. It requires deep work for them to understand why they are comfortable with cheating and lying and hurting others. I am fairly confident the woman my husband cheated with saw him as a replacement for her Dad. It is very immature behavior. Obviously people can change if they want but there is no justification. As hurt as I have been, I would never want what is going on with the OW to be my life.

[Anonymous]

My FIL married his mistress and she waited for him. It's been over a decade since they got married and they are truly happy and made for each other.