Takoma Park MD if you're not woke

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I live in TP. My husband and I are on the conservative side of moderate. We love living here. We have great neighbours, etc. We don't talk politics. I think people commenting for the most part don't live here and haven't experienced the day to day reality.

OP here ... This is what we're intd in ... Living around down to earth ppl entitled to hold various political views & have respectful intg discussions. Don't mind folks spinning out far-left views and ideals, which we generally consider with an open mind (and neither one of us is in the "little bit racist" camp, whatever that means) ... More like she's active in church and turned off by the casual disparagement of faith you sometimes hear from the clever set ... and all-things-equal, leans toward fiscal responsibility. I.e.: Receiving the same kind of respect we give.

You may hear indeed what she could see as a "casual disparagement of faith from the clever set" here. Not as an attack but as an expression that atheism is as much a valid and casual opinion as choosing to believe in a religion. Which is really hard to express in most context in the US..

[Anonymous]

Takoma Park is widely known as one of the most liberal areas in the state, with a proud history of activism in support of the environment, diversity and equality. It’s commonly referred to as “The People’s Republic of Takoma Park” or “The Berkeley of the East” and, in political circles, some elected officials from there are jokingly referred to as “Takoma Park liberals.” In a 2011 story by The Washington Post, Takoma Park was referred to as a “hippie haven” that “has declared itself a nuclear-free zone and a sanctuary city where illegal immigrants are protected.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Behavioral expectations for Takoma Park women.

Recently, in the middle of rush hour, (it was noisy), I had to ask a stranger for a favor in Takoma Park. Had to ask her to move her car. She was sitting in a parking lot on her phone and she'd watched me try and maneuver my own car around hers in a crowded lot--and fail--for several minutes. I waved from my car to get her attention. She looked at me and turned away. I got out and knocked on her window. She opened the passenger side window--the one farthest from us both and asked me what I wanted. I explained. Of course, over the traffic noise, and so she could hear me at all, I had to raise my voice to do so.

She told me she didn't like my tone, and I had no need to be so rude when she was going to do me a favor.

In normal places I'd consider this a one-off, a miscommunication. I'm sure you'll eviscerate me forasking in the first place, or finding something wrong in that exchange. But it's quite typical of TPK.

In my experience living here, you ask for help with a stray cat you're feeding on the listserve, you get a lecture about how outdoor cats are bad. (I don't disagree.) Remember the shortages early in the pandemic? I offered my neighbors some of our supplies and got told that there were more needy and deserving people, and I really should be volunteering to help those less fortunate bipoc instead. Over the years exchanges like this have piled up. No, they're not the worst things in the world, bless their sheltered little trust fund hearts, my neighbors all mean well--but when they're not being remarkably passive aggressive and sanctimonious, they're just so socially constrained and afraid to cause offense that they're poor conversationalists. They don't have opinions, they have slogans. They're less neighbors than they are evangelicals, who are always quick to point out how love lives here and how diverse they are... as long as that doesn't mean they have to deal with fireworks, or anything on the other side of New Hampshire.

I won't convince any Takoma Park lovers... But again, they don't think there's anything wrong with capitalizing "White."

If these few things throw you off this much, I can't imagine you'd get along well anywhere. I mean, it sounds like you didn't get the pats on the back you were looking for when you posted publicly that you want to feed stray cats or give toilet paper to your neighbors. My advice is stay off of listservs because they are, inevitably, the province of toxic weirdos (which is maybe why you were there in the first place).

I am a center right UMC while male. I have no problem discussing anything around here. Some people disagree with me, and I'm fine with that. But one of the things I love about this town is that politics are just not discussed all that much--at least around me. And the other thing I've found is that when you speak truthfully and intelligently about social issues from the from a more traditional or conservative viewpoint, there are LOTS of people around here who agree.

The other thing I don't get is the feeling that TKPK politicians are annoying. Who even pays attention to the mayor and city council these days?

Anyway, I really enjoy it here. It has a great family friendly atmosphere, a nice downtown area, the junction (which is getting nicer), an interesting housing stock, and decent schools. Certainly some annoying people, but that's anywhere. They are far outnumbered, in my experience, by the really nice people I've encountered and made friends with over the years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you don't drive a Prius or Subaru, with a "Coexist" bumper sticker on the back, you'll be ostracized.

Liberal who drives a Subaru here. I can't stand those darn Coexist bumper stickers. They strike me as so grossly performative and preachy that I get angry at an irrational level every time I see one.

+1, and I’m another liberal who drives an EV—and lives in Takoma Park. I also don’t have performative lawn signs. In fact, the bumper sticker and lawn signs are a small minority. Some pps here are channeling David Brooks’ book where he claims we’re all “frizzy-haired” profs who love to lecture others. In fact nothing could be further from the truth. In my neighborhood, one of the nicest in TPK, the only woman who gets sh!t-talked is the one who lets her cats roam free.

The pp who said that there’s a kernel of rapidity aging hippies, and the new families are relatively wealthy and here for the schools, has it right.

Agree, and I live in TKPK, too. I am not "woke" at all, and I am not even "left" on most social issues. I do think that you will find that Trump is largely hated here, so if you were big a Trump supporter, you would probably not find your people. But that's the case with most neighborhoods in the DC area. I also don't mind people disagreeing with my take on social or political issues when they do come up, so I don't feel the need to search out people with my exact beliefs. But I would say, mostly people don't talk about politics here. People come here mainly for the housing stock, decent schools, and the town feel. There are lots of very social neighbors with interesting professional and personal backgrounds, and it feels fairly suburban while being convenient to a lot of urban benefits (like museums, concerts, etc.)

This, exactly. The posters trying to scare readers with images of being button-holed, as you're walking your dog, by a banshee shrieking about abortion rights obviously don't live in TPK.

I live in TKPK and profoundly disagree. I am a relatively new family, i am wealthy, bought an expensive home and came for the schools. But first and foremost I came for the crunchy, hippy, leftist, environmentally friendly, worldly, international, tolerant to immigrants, to LGBTQ, for the activist and militant vibe of people who care about society, about change, about climate and who don't want to be silent and just live materialistic lives focused on living in comfort. I didnt choose Bethesda Chevy CHase or even AU park, just because of that.

My neighbors and friends are all passionate people who care about social justice and climate in one way or another, even small ways. I don't mind those who are not and wish them well. But they are not the people i came for and i don't seek their company.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you don't drive a Prius or Subaru, with a "Coexist" bumper sticker on the back, you'll be ostracized.

Liberal who drives a Subaru here. I can't stand those darn Coexist bumper stickers. They strike me as so grossly performative and preachy that I get angry at an irrational level every time I see one.

+1, and I’m another liberal who drives an EV—and lives in Takoma Park. I also don’t have performative lawn signs. In fact, the bumper sticker and lawn signs are a small minority. Some pps here are channeling David Brooks’ book where he claims we’re all “frizzy-haired” profs who love to lecture others. In fact nothing could be further from the truth. In my neighborhood, one of the nicest in TPK, the only woman who gets sh!t-talked is the one who lets her cats roam free.

The pp who said that there’s a kernel of rapidity aging hippies, and the new families are relatively wealthy and here for the schools, has it right.

Agree, and I live in TKPK, too. I am not "woke" at all, and I am not even "left" on most social issues. I do think that you will find that Trump is largely hated here, so if you were big a Trump supporter, you would probably not find your people. But that's the case with most neighborhoods in the DC area. I also don't mind people disagreeing with my take on social or political issues when they do come up, so I don't feel the need to search out people with my exact beliefs. But I would say, mostly people don't talk about politics here. People come here mainly for the housing stock, decent schools, and the town feel. There are lots of very social neighbors with interesting professional and personal backgrounds, and it feels fairly suburban while being convenient to a lot of urban benefits (like museums, concerts, etc.)

This, exactly. The posters trying to scare readers with images of being button-holed, as you're walking your dog, by a banshee shrieking about abortion rights obviously don't live in TPK.

I live in TKPK and profoundly disagree. I am a relatively new family, i am wealthy, bought an expensive home and came for the schools. But first and foremost I came for the crunchy, hippy, leftist, environmentally friendly, worldly, international, tolerant to immigrants, to LGBTQ, for the activist and militant vibe of people who care about society, about change, about climate and who don't want to be silent and just live materialistic lives focused on living in comfort. I didnt choose Bethesda Chevy CHase or even AU park, just because of that.

My neighbors and friends are all passionate people who care about social justice and climate in one way or another, even small ways. I don't mind those who are not and wish them well. But they are not the people i came for and i don't seek their company.

Sorry, to clarify, as the quote didn't reflect it. What i profoundly disagree with is this "mostly people don't talk about politics here. People come here mainly for the housing stock, decent schools, and the town feel. There are lots of very social neighbors with interesting professional and personal backgrounds, and it feels fairly suburban".

This makes it sounds as if TKPK was a DC suburb just like the others. One day it may be but so far it is not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you don't drive a Prius or Subaru, with a "Coexist" bumper sticker on the back, you'll be ostracized.

Liberal who drives a Subaru here. I can't stand those darn Coexist bumper stickers. They strike me as so grossly performative and preachy that I get angry at an irrational level every time I see one.

+1, and I’m another liberal who drives an EV—and lives in Takoma Park. I also don’t have performative lawn signs. In fact, the bumper sticker and lawn signs are a small minority. Some pps here are channeling David Brooks’ book where he claims we’re all “frizzy-haired” profs who love to lecture others. In fact nothing could be further from the truth. In my neighborhood, one of the nicest in TPK, the only woman who gets sh!t-talked is the one who lets her cats roam free.

The pp who said that there’s a kernel of rapidity aging hippies, and the new families are relatively wealthy and here for the schools, has it right.

Agree, and I live in TKPK, too. I am not "woke" at all, and I am not even "left" on most social issues. I do think that you will find that Trump is largely hated here, so if you were big a Trump supporter, you would probably not find your people. But that's the case with most neighborhoods in the DC area. I also don't mind people disagreeing with my take on social or political issues when they do come up, so I don't feel the need to search out people with my exact beliefs. But I would say, mostly people don't talk about politics here. People come here mainly for the housing stock, decent schools, and the town feel. There are lots of very social neighbors with interesting professional and personal backgrounds, and it feels fairly suburban while being convenient to a lot of urban benefits (like museums, concerts, etc.)

This, exactly. The posters trying to scare readers with images of being button-holed, as you're walking your dog, by a banshee shrieking about abortion rights obviously don't live in TPK.

I live in TKPK and profoundly disagree. I am a relatively new family, i am wealthy, bought an expensive home and came for the schools. But first and foremost I came for the crunchy, hippy, leftist, environmentally friendly, worldly, international, tolerant to immigrants, to LGBTQ, for the activist and militant vibe of people who care about society, about change, about climate and who don't want to be silent and just live materialistic lives focused on living in comfort. I didnt choose Bethesda Chevy CHase or even AU park, just because of that.

My neighbors and friends are all passionate people who care about social justice and climate in one way or another, even small ways. I don't mind those who are not and wish them well. But they are not the people i came for and i don't seek their company.

Sorry, to clarify, as the quote didn't reflect it. What i profoundly disagree with is this "mostly people don't talk about politics here. People come here mainly for the housing stock, decent schools, and the town feel. There are lots of very social neighbors with interesting professional and personal backgrounds, and it feels fairly suburban".

This makes it sounds as if TKPK was a DC suburb just like the others. One day it may be but so far it is not.

I live in TKPK (have lived here quite a while) and have a different take. And I find it sort of funny that you're talking about moving here for the "crunchy" or "hippy" vibe, or the idea that people here don't want to "live materialistic lives focused on living in comfort." This doesn't describe the vast majority of people here, and it especially doesn't describe the people who have moved here recently who can afford to pay 1+ million for a house. There is tons of material wealth on display here, and very, very few crunchy or hippy people anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you define “woke”?

Is the opposite “asleep”?

If you want to live somewhere “asleep,” maybe Reston is good for you.

Virtue signaling, dogmatic, ideological people who firmly believe they're on the right side of history and sneer at those who don't agree with them as lesser species. You know, the people who call you racist no matter what you say, transphobic no matter what you say, etc, and that you are the second coming of you know what just for daring to vote differently. They pride themselves for being tolerant and open-minded while simultaneously being the most intolerant and judgmental people.

NP: this is my experience with TPK.

My family's run afoul of them for a few "transgressions," and the experiences have honestly left me so emotionally scarred that I've stopped trying to have any relationship or interaction with our community.

Now, you may think this is a "me" problem for being thin-skinned and weak... and perhaps it is. But I'm someone who was raised in a liberal religion, went to Quaker schools, votes Democrat across the board, doesn't own guns, supports immigration, etc. On paper I am a crunchy liberal. But these people and their toxic combination of affluence and disdain and carelessness, nearly broke my family apart.

There's a very rigid expectation about behavior, perhaps especially among Takoma Park women, that many of us mortals can't meet. Everything is passive aggressive. Tone is important. You should also probably apologize for any white privilege, (or bring up any bipoc ancestors), at least ten times in every conversation. It's performative, stultifying, and not at all fun.

Could you give an example of behavior "expectations" among Takoma Park women? I'm one, and I've never felt any pressure to be anything besides myself. I'm also pretty much the opposite of passive aggressive and I never worry about tone.

What conversations have you had where you needed to apologize for white privilege 10 times in every conversation? I've never apologized to anybody in Takoma Park for being White.

None of this makes sense. I doubt you ever lived in Takoma Park. You're probably a resident MAGA who's bored and slagging off the libs.

And let's just talk about how you capitalize the word "white."

You know who does that? Takoma park liberals and white supremacists. Funny, how liberal overcorrection leads to the same dismal place reached by fundies in Idaho. And by funny, I mean I'm lying: it's not funny.

DP - it triggers you to see White capitalized? Really?? Wow. Dude, it's just a convention. Calm down.

It's not a convention--or it wasn't until very recently. Black is capitalized when referring to a the Black identity. In America, the term has a specific meaning we can all get around: the identification of a group of people of African descent with shared history and culture. That definition includes both the tragedies and the triumphs of a collective past.

Capitalizing the word "white" has the effect of implying that "white" people should have a similar Identity. In Takoma Park, a place full of white people who have very little exposure to how this can go sideways, it probably seems fine. "Equitable," even. But it's not. What you're doing is legitimizing the kind of fake history that imagines there really is such a thing as a white race, and that this thing is a collective Identity.

Try to keep up. Not capitalizing "white" implies it's some kind of norm. Which it's not. That's why it's now capitalized.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you don't drive a Prius or Subaru, with a "Coexist" bumper sticker on the back, you'll be ostracized.

Liberal who drives a Subaru here. I can't stand those darn Coexist bumper stickers. They strike me as so grossly performative and preachy that I get angry at an irrational level every time I see one.

+1, and I’m another liberal who drives an EV—and lives in Takoma Park. I also don’t have performative lawn signs. In fact, the bumper sticker and lawn signs are a small minority. Some pps here are channeling David Brooks’ book where he claims we’re all “frizzy-haired” profs who love to lecture others. In fact nothing could be further from the truth. In my neighborhood, one of the nicest in TPK, the only woman who gets sh!t-talked is the one who lets her cats roam free.

The pp who said that there’s a kernel of rapidity aging hippies, and the new families are relatively wealthy and here for the schools, has it right.

Agree, and I live in TKPK, too. I am not "woke" at all, and I am not even "left" on most social issues. I do think that you will find that Trump is largely hated here, so if you were big a Trump supporter, you would probably not find your people. But that's the case with most neighborhoods in the DC area. I also don't mind people disagreeing with my take on social or political issues when they do come up, so I don't feel the need to search out people with my exact beliefs. But I would say, mostly people don't talk about politics here. People come here mainly for the housing stock, decent schools, and the town feel. There are lots of very social neighbors with interesting professional and personal backgrounds, and it feels fairly suburban while being convenient to a lot of urban benefits (like museums, concerts, etc.)

This, exactly. The posters trying to scare readers with images of being button-holed, as you're walking your dog, by a banshee shrieking about abortion rights obviously don't live in TPK.

I live in TKPK and profoundly disagree. I am a relatively new family, i am wealthy, bought an expensive home and came for the schools. But first and foremost I came for the crunchy, hippy, leftist, environmentally friendly, worldly, international, tolerant to immigrants, to LGBTQ, for the activist and militant vibe of people who care about society, about change, about climate and who don't want to be silent and just live materialistic lives focused on living in comfort. I didnt choose Bethesda Chevy CHase or even AU park, just because of that.

My neighbors and friends are all passionate people who care about social justice and climate in one way or another, even small ways. I don't mind those who are not and wish them well. But they are not the people i came for and i don't seek their company.

Sorry, to clarify, as the quote didn't reflect it. What i profoundly disagree with is this "mostly people don't talk about politics here. People come here mainly for the housing stock, decent schools, and the town feel. There are lots of very social neighbors with interesting professional and personal backgrounds, and it feels fairly suburban".

This makes it sounds as if TKPK was a DC suburb just like the others. One day it may be but so far it is not.

I live in TKPK (have lived here quite a while) and have a different take. And I find it sort of funny that you're talking about moving here for the "crunchy" or "hippy" vibe, or the idea that people here don't want to "live materialistic lives focused on living in comfort." This doesn't describe the vast majority of people here, and it especially doesn't describe the people who have moved here recently who can afford to pay 1+ million for a house. There is tons of material wealth on display here, and very, very few crunchy or hippy people anymore.

This. Several houses in my TKPK neighborhood have gone for well over $1m in the past year or two. The new owners who could afford that aren't spending their days in drum circles. In fact, I can't think of any really crunchy/hippy people in my neighborhood, instead everybody is remodeling their kitchens. I know a single hippy type across Piney Branch road. Most of the 60s and 70s hippies have retired and moved out of their SFHs, and many have died because, after all, we're talking about 50-60 years ago. For a while in the 80s and 90s TKPK was known as a refuge for LGBTQ+, but even that reputation has faded as the county as a whole has become more welcoming and LGBTQ+ have more choices.

The "behavioral expectations" poster sounds like a bit of a pit bull, shouting at people to move their cars and so on. Nothing wrong with being assertive, but let's not blame other people when it blows up on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you don't drive a Prius or Subaru, with a "Coexist" bumper sticker on the back, you'll be ostracized.

Liberal who drives a Subaru here. I can't stand those darn Coexist bumper stickers. They strike me as so grossly performative and preachy that I get angry at an irrational level every time I see one.

+1, and I’m another liberal who drives an EV—and lives in Takoma Park. I also don’t have performative lawn signs. In fact, the bumper sticker and lawn signs are a small minority. Some pps here are channeling David Brooks’ book where he claims we’re all “frizzy-haired” profs who love to lecture others. In fact nothing could be further from the truth. In my neighborhood, one of the nicest in TPK, the only woman who gets sh!t-talked is the one who lets her cats roam free.

The pp who said that there’s a kernel of rapidity aging hippies, and the new families are relatively wealthy and here for the schools, has it right.

Agree, and I live in TKPK, too. I am not "woke" at all, and I am not even "left" on most social issues. I do think that you will find that Trump is largely hated here, so if you were big a Trump supporter, you would probably not find your people. But that's the case with most neighborhoods in the DC area. I also don't mind people disagreeing with my take on social or political issues when they do come up, so I don't feel the need to search out people with my exact beliefs. But I would say, mostly people don't talk about politics here. People come here mainly for the housing stock, decent schools, and the town feel. There are lots of very social neighbors with interesting professional and personal backgrounds, and it feels fairly suburban while being convenient to a lot of urban benefits (like museums, concerts, etc.)

This, exactly. The posters trying to scare readers with images of being button-holed, as you're walking your dog, by a banshee shrieking about abortion rights obviously don't live in TPK.

I live in TKPK and profoundly disagree. I am a relatively new family, i am wealthy, bought an expensive home and came for the schools. But first and foremost I came for the crunchy, hippy, leftist, environmentally friendly, worldly, international, tolerant to immigrants, to LGBTQ, for the activist and militant vibe of people who care about society, about change, about climate and who don't want to be silent and just live materialistic lives focused on living in comfort. I didnt choose Bethesda Chevy CHase or even AU park, just because of that.

My neighbors and friends are all passionate people who care about social justice and climate in one way or another, even small ways. I don't mind those who are not and wish them well. But they are not the people i came for and i don't seek their company.

Welcome to TKPK! I'm another resident and I guess I somewhat disagree with this. I live in one of the wealthier sections of town, so maybe I know you/who you are. It's definitely true that most of us are liberal, for the reasons OP articulates around concern about being an outlier. And many of my neighbors work for not-for-profits or are professors. But I almost never talk politics with our neighbors. Our neighborhood list serve has never, contrary to what the TKPK hater said, scolded anybody for looking for a nearby food pantry instead of going farther afield (although one woman has occasionally been scolded for letting her cats roam free). We did have a banging of the pots when Biden was confirmed as president, and certainly list serve posters make subtle political assumptions, which probably aren't unwarranted given said predominance of liberals. But I've never seen people scold a conservative. Never.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you define “woke”?

Is the opposite “asleep”?

If you want to live somewhere “asleep,” maybe Reston is good for you.

Virtue signaling, dogmatic, ideological people who firmly believe they're on the right side of history and sneer at those who don't agree with them as lesser species. You know, the people who call you racist no matter what you say, transphobic no matter what you say, etc, and that you are the second coming of you know what just for daring to vote differently. They pride themselves for being tolerant and open-minded while simultaneously being the most intolerant and judgmental people.

NP: this is my experience with TPK.

My family's run afoul of them for a few "transgressions," and the experiences have honestly left me so emotionally scarred that I've stopped trying to have any relationship or interaction with our community.

Now, you may think this is a "me" problem for being thin-skinned and weak... and perhaps it is. But I'm someone who was raised in a liberal religion, went to Quaker schools, votes Democrat across the board, doesn't own guns, supports immigration, etc. On paper I am a crunchy liberal. But these people and their toxic combination of affluence and disdain and carelessness, nearly broke my family apart.

There's a very rigid expectation about behavior, perhaps especially among Takoma Park women, that many of us mortals can't meet. Everything is passive aggressive. Tone is important. You should also probably apologize for any white privilege, (or bring up any bipoc ancestors), at least ten times in every conversation. It's performative, stultifying, and not at all fun.

Could you give an example of behavior "expectations" among Takoma Park women? I'm one, and I've never felt any pressure to be anything besides myself. I'm also pretty much the opposite of passive aggressive and I never worry about tone.

What conversations have you had where you needed to apologize for white privilege 10 times in every conversation? I've never apologized to anybody in Takoma Park for being White.

None of this makes sense. I doubt you ever lived in Takoma Park. You're probably a resident MAGA who's bored and slagging off the libs.

And let's just talk about how you capitalize the word "white."

You know who does that? Takoma park liberals and white supremacists. Funny, how liberal overcorrection leads to the same dismal place reached by fundies in Idaho. And by funny, I mean I'm lying: it's not funny.

DP - it triggers you to see White capitalized? Really?? Wow. Dude, it's just a convention. Calm down.

It's not a convention--or it wasn't until very recently. Black is capitalized when referring to a the Black identity. In America, the term has a specific meaning we can all get around: the identification of a group of people of African descent with shared history and culture. That definition includes both the tragedies and the triumphs of a collective past.

Capitalizing the word "white" has the effect of implying that "white" people should have a similar Identity. In Takoma Park, a place full of white people who have very little exposure to how this can go sideways, it probably seems fine. "Equitable," even. But it's not. What you're doing is legitimizing the kind of fake history that imagines there really is such a thing as a white race, and that this thing is a collective Identity.

I hear what you are saying but I don't think some racial equity advocates understand how incredibly off-putting it is to constantly be changing the rules around terminology/capitalization and acting like when a person uses the old rule, they are doing something horrible to Black people. It really undermines the credibility of the racial equity movement.

To me capitalizing White emphasizes that race is a social construct. Also, the whole point of White supremacy culture is this notion that Whiteness is better. That can't exist if White people don't have a shared history (of oppressing BIPOC people). Is it an identity to embrace and promote? Of course not. But it exist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you define “woke”?

Is the opposite “asleep”?

If you want to live somewhere “asleep,” maybe Reston is good for you.

Virtue signaling, dogmatic, ideological people who firmly believe they're on the right side of history and sneer at those who don't agree with them as lesser species. You know, the people who call you racist no matter what you say, transphobic no matter what you say, etc, and that you are the second coming of you know what just for daring to vote differently. They pride themselves for being tolerant and open-minded while simultaneously being the most intolerant and judgmental people.

NP: this is my experience with TPK.

My family's run afoul of them for a few "transgressions," and the experiences have honestly left me so emotionally scarred that I've stopped trying to have any relationship or interaction with our community.

Now, you may think this is a "me" problem for being thin-skinned and weak... and perhaps it is. But I'm someone who was raised in a liberal religion, went to Quaker schools, votes Democrat across the board, doesn't own guns, supports immigration, etc. On paper I am a crunchy liberal. But these people and their toxic combination of affluence and disdain and carelessness, nearly broke my family apart.

There's a very rigid expectation about behavior, perhaps especially among Takoma Park women, that many of us mortals can't meet. Everything is passive aggressive. Tone is important. You should also probably apologize for any white privilege, (or bring up any bipoc ancestors), at least ten times in every conversation. It's performative, stultifying, and not at all fun.

Could you give an example of behavior "expectations" among Takoma Park women? I'm one, and I've never felt any pressure to be anything besides myself. I'm also pretty much the opposite of passive aggressive and I never worry about tone.

What conversations have you had where you needed to apologize for white privilege 10 times in every conversation? I've never apologized to anybody in Takoma Park for being White.

None of this makes sense. I doubt you ever lived in Takoma Park. You're probably a resident MAGA who's bored and slagging off the libs.

And let's just talk about how you capitalize the word "white."

You know who does that? Takoma park liberals and white supremacists. Funny, how liberal overcorrection leads to the same dismal place reached by fundies in Idaho. And by funny, I mean I'm lying: it's not funny.

DP - it triggers you to see White capitalized? Really?? Wow. Dude, it's just a convention. Calm down.

It's not a convention--or it wasn't until very recently. Black is capitalized when referring to a the Black identity. In America, the term has a specific meaning we can all get around: the identification of a group of people of African descent with shared history and culture. That definition includes both the tragedies and the triumphs of a collective past.

Capitalizing the word "white" has the effect of implying that "white" people should have a similar Identity. In Takoma Park, a place full of white people who have very little exposure to how this can go sideways, it probably seems fine. "Equitable," even. But it's not. What you're doing is legitimizing the kind of fake history that imagines there really is such a thing as a white race, and that this thing is a collective Identity.

I hear what you are saying but I don't think some racial equity advocates understand how incredibly off-putting it is to constantly be changing the rules around terminology/capitalization and acting like when a person uses the old rule, they are doing something horrible to Black people. It really undermines the credibility of the racial equity movement.

To me capitalizing White emphasizes that race is a social construct. Also, the whole point of White supremacy culture is this notion that Whiteness is better. That can't exist if White people don't have a shared history (of oppressing BIPOC people). Is it an identity to embrace and promote? Of course not. But it exist.

The only people who give a crap about this are people for whom their entire identity is arguing about identity politics and who are very invested in keeping people as angry as possible. This goes for both sides of the political aisle. The vast majority of the world, including the people I interact with regularly in TKPK and the rest of the DC area, don't care about these things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you define “woke”?

Is the opposite “asleep”?

If you want to live somewhere “asleep,” maybe Reston is good for you.

Virtue signaling, dogmatic, ideological people who firmly believe they're on the right side of history and sneer at those who don't agree with them as lesser species. You know, the people who call you racist no matter what you say, transphobic no matter what you say, etc, and that you are the second coming of you know what just for daring to vote differently. They pride themselves for being tolerant and open-minded while simultaneously being the most intolerant and judgmental people.

NP: this is my experience with TPK.

My family's run afoul of them for a few "transgressions," and the experiences have honestly left me so emotionally scarred that I've stopped trying to have any relationship or interaction with our community.

Now, you may think this is a "me" problem for being thin-skinned and weak... and perhaps it is. But I'm someone who was raised in a liberal religion, went to Quaker schools, votes Democrat across the board, doesn't own guns, supports immigration, etc. On paper I am a crunchy liberal. But these people and their toxic combination of affluence and disdain and carelessness, nearly broke my family apart.

There's a very rigid expectation about behavior, perhaps especially among Takoma Park women, that many of us mortals can't meet. Everything is passive aggressive. Tone is important. You should also probably apologize for any white privilege, (or bring up any bipoc ancestors), at least ten times in every conversation. It's performative, stultifying, and not at all fun.

Could you give an example of behavior "expectations" among Takoma Park women? I'm one, and I've never felt any pressure to be anything besides myself. I'm also pretty much the opposite of passive aggressive and I never worry about tone.

What conversations have you had where you needed to apologize for white privilege 10 times in every conversation? I've never apologized to anybody in Takoma Park for being White.

None of this makes sense. I doubt you ever lived in Takoma Park. You're probably a resident MAGA who's bored and slagging off the libs.

And let's just talk about how you capitalize the word "white."

You know who does that? Takoma park liberals and white supremacists. Funny, how liberal overcorrection leads to the same dismal place reached by fundies in Idaho. And by funny, I mean I'm lying: it's not funny.

DP - it triggers you to see White capitalized? Really?? Wow. Dude, it's just a convention. Calm down.

It's not a convention--or it wasn't until very recently. Black is capitalized when referring to a the Black identity. In America, the term has a specific meaning we can all get around: the identification of a group of people of African descent with shared history and culture. That definition includes both the tragedies and the triumphs of a collective past.

Capitalizing the word "white" has the effect of implying that "white" people should have a similar Identity. In Takoma Park, a place full of white people who have very little exposure to how this can go sideways, it probably seems fine. "Equitable," even. But it's not. What you're doing is legitimizing the kind of fake history that imagines there really is such a thing as a white race, and that this thing is a collective Identity.

I hear what you are saying but I don't think some racial equity advocates understand how incredibly off-putting it is to constantly be changing the rules around terminology/capitalization and acting like when a person uses the old rule, they are doing something horrible to Black people. It really undermines the credibility of the racial equity movement.

To me capitalizing White emphasizes that race is a social construct. Also, the whole point of White supremacy culture is this notion that Whiteness is better. That can't exist if White people don't have a shared history (of oppressing BIPOC people). Is it an identity to embrace and promote? Of course not. But it exist.

The only people who give a crap about this are people for whom their entire identity is arguing about identity politics and who are very invested in keeping people as angry as possible. This goes for both sides of the political aisle. The vast majority of the world, including the people I interact with regularly in TKPK and the rest of the DC area, don't care about these things.

TKPK conservative here. This is correct. Takoma Park is a nice place to live with generally nice people. My neighbors and TP friends are great. It’s like any other neighborhood — we talk about our kids, pets, our street, food, etc, not identity politics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I live in TP. My husband and I are on the conservative side of moderate. We love living here. We have great neighbours, etc. We don't talk politics. I think people commenting for the most part don't live here and haven't experienced the day to day reality.

OP here ... This is what we're intd in ... Living around down to earth ppl entitled to hold various political views & have respectful intg discussions. Don't mind folks spinning out far-left views and ideals, which we generally consider with an open mind (and neither one of us is in the "little bit racist" camp, whatever that means) ... More like she's active in church and turned off by the casual disparagement of faith you sometimes hear from the clever set ... and all-things-equal, leans toward fiscal responsibility. I.e.: Receiving the same kind of respect we give.

You may hear indeed what she could see as a "casual disparagement of faith from the clever set" here. Not as an attack but as an expression that atheism is as much a valid and casual opinion as choosing to believe in a religion. Which is really hard to express in most context in the US..

I'm a religious TKPKer and I've never experienced "casual disparagement of faith" except from my BIL, and he lives several states away. DCUM's religion forum, of course, is a hornets nest of disparagement....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you define “woke”?

Is the opposite “asleep”?

If you want to live somewhere “asleep,” maybe Reston is good for you.

Virtue signaling, dogmatic, ideological people who firmly believe they're on the right side of history and sneer at those who don't agree with them as lesser species. You know, the people who call you racist no matter what you say, transphobic no matter what you say, etc, and that you are the second coming of you know what just for daring to vote differently. They pride themselves for being tolerant and open-minded while simultaneously being the most intolerant and judgmental people.

NP: this is my experience with TPK.

My family's run afoul of them for a few "transgressions," and the experiences have honestly left me so emotionally scarred that I've stopped trying to have any relationship or interaction with our community.

Now, you may think this is a "me" problem for being thin-skinned and weak... and perhaps it is. But I'm someone who was raised in a liberal religion, went to Quaker schools, votes Democrat across the board, doesn't own guns, supports immigration, etc. On paper I am a crunchy liberal. But these people and their toxic combination of affluence and disdain and carelessness, nearly broke my family apart.

There's a very rigid expectation about behavior, perhaps especially among Takoma Park women, that many of us mortals can't meet. Everything is passive aggressive. Tone is important. You should also probably apologize for any white privilege, (or bring up any bipoc ancestors), at least ten times in every conversation. It's performative, stultifying, and not at all fun.

Could you give an example of behavior "expectations" among Takoma Park women? I'm one, and I've never felt any pressure to be anything besides myself. I'm also pretty much the opposite of passive aggressive and I never worry about tone.

What conversations have you had where you needed to apologize for white privilege 10 times in every conversation? I've never apologized to anybody in Takoma Park for being White.

None of this makes sense. I doubt you ever lived in Takoma Park. You're probably a resident MAGA who's bored and slagging off the libs.

And let's just talk about how you capitalize the word "white."

You know who does that? Takoma park liberals and white supremacists. Funny, how liberal overcorrection leads to the same dismal place reached by fundies in Idaho. And by funny, I mean I'm lying: it's not funny.

DP - it triggers you to see White capitalized? Really?? Wow. Dude, it's just a convention. Calm down.

It's not a convention--or it wasn't until very recently. Black is capitalized when referring to a the Black identity. In America, the term has a specific meaning we can all get around: the identification of a group of people of African descent with shared history and culture. That definition includes both the tragedies and the triumphs of a collective past.

Capitalizing the word "white" has the effect of implying that "white" people should have a similar Identity. In Takoma Park, a place full of white people who have very little exposure to how this can go sideways, it probably seems fine. "Equitable," even. But it's not. What you're doing is legitimizing the kind of fake history that imagines there really is such a thing as a white race, and that this thing is a collective Identity.

I hear what you are saying but I don't think some racial equity advocates understand how incredibly off-putting it is to constantly be changing the rules around terminology/capitalization and acting like when a person uses the old rule, they are doing something horrible to Black people. It really undermines the credibility of the racial equity movement.

To me capitalizing White emphasizes that race is a social construct. Also, the whole point of White supremacy culture is this notion that Whiteness is better. That can't exist if White people don't have a shared history (of oppressing BIPOC people). Is it an identity to embrace and promote? Of course not. But it exist.

The only people who give a crap about this are people for whom their entire identity is arguing about identity politics and who are very invested in keeping people as angry as possible. This goes for both sides of the political aisle. The vast majority of the world, including the people I interact with regularly in TKPK and the rest of the DC area, don't care about these things.

TKPK conservative here. This is correct. Takoma Park is a nice place to live with generally nice people. My neighbors and TP friends are great. It’s like any other neighborhood — we talk about our kids, pets, our street, food, etc, not identity politics.

omg just stop already with the "identity politics" you are an idiot.

Your boy just told a panel of judges in DC that he is above the law and can kill his political opponents with seal team 6 without any reprocussions.

Spewing your conservative garbage is not a good look. And for god's sake get a dam dictionary. Here easy Dictionary.com. You have no idea what woke means. You and your sub human Bethany Mandel.

^^^ Who is this angry individual with the terrible grammar? I doubt they live in Takoma Park.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I live in TP. My husband and I are on the conservative side of moderate. We love living here. We have great neighbours, etc. We don't talk politics. I think people commenting for the most part don't live here and haven't experienced the day to day reality.

OP here ... This is what we're intd in ... Living around down to earth ppl entitled to hold various political views & have respectful intg discussions. Don't mind folks spinning out far-left views and ideals, which we generally consider with an open mind (and neither one of us is in the "little bit racist" camp, whatever that means) ... More like she's active in church and turned off by the casual disparagement of faith you sometimes hear from the clever set ... and all-things-equal, leans toward fiscal responsibility. I.e.: Receiving the same kind of respect we give.

You may hear indeed what she could see as a "casual disparagement of faith from the clever set" here. Not as an attack but as an expression that atheism is as much a valid and casual opinion as choosing to believe in a religion. Which is really hard to express in most context in the US..

I'm a religious TKPKer and I've never experienced "casual disparagement of faith" except from my BIL, and he lives several states away. DCUM's religion forum, of course, is a hornets nest of disparagement....

I'm just outside Takoma Park and quite religious and I've never experienced this locally either. Lots of the congregation from my church lives in Takoma Park too.