Takoma Park MD if you're not woke

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me explain some basic grammar, since perhaps you didn't learn it at your kids" Waldorf or your own six years at Sarah Lawrence:

Capitalize countries and continents. Hence, someone is Israeli, or Palestinian, or Asian, or European. Capitalize religions. Someone can be Jewish or Episcopalian. Or B'hai. Capitalizing Black, in reference to people who are of African-American or Caribbean heritage, when referring to that specific identity, falls under this domain.

But when you *don't* capitalize white, you are not saying it's "the norm." I mean, sure no doubt it was the norm in the UMC suburb that raised you, but not for the rest of us. When you don't capitalize white it becomes a descriptor. Like blond. Like black or brown when you're using the words as a neutral descriptors, which is, by the way, a perfectly acceptable way to use them.

When you do capitalize white, you are legitimizing people who believe there is actually a white "race." A white identity. It's really just a hop, skip, and a few bonfires from there to all the stuff you spend a great deal of time insisting you despise.

What? All race is a social construct. Blackness is a social construct. It's also an identity. Whiteness is also an identity whether White people admit it or not. Capitalizing White doesn't mean I think White people are better. It just means I acknowledge Whiteness as a real social construct that exists in our society.

Which society? I have no doubt that "Whiteness" exists in your upper-class bubble where you all giggle nervously and mention your Turkish great-grandmother whenever the topic comes up during book club. One could--I would not--make the argument that "Whiteness" exists as an American identity, and yes, that existence is in opposition to "Blackness," but in doing so, you are bringing with it all of the negative, racist, regressive baggage that the people who believed in it intended--whether you intend that or not. How? Because you're still setting up "White" in opposition to "Black," like these are real states of opposition--which, by the way, they are not.

Actually since you posted the links, I googled and found several disagreeing, and their disagreements echo my own concerns. It's far from a settled issue.

Language changes over time, but if you think that's always a social evolution to a progressive utopia... Well, I'd say you've spent a bit too much time in Takoma Park. And also admiring your own naval.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a safe, "Bethesda-esque" area / section in Tacoma Park, MD?

North Takoma is one safe area, although the hater here will try to convince you gangs are having shoot-outs on the college campus. Best to ignore them.

Note: I haven't said one word about crime. I'm not scared of gangs. I just really don't like smug affluent people who are also cruel.

--tp hater

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you define “woke”?

Is the opposite “asleep”?

If you want to live somewhere “asleep,” maybe Reston is good for you.

Virtue signaling, dogmatic, ideological people who firmly believe they're on the right side of history and sneer at those who don't agree with them as lesser species. You know, the people who call you racist no matter what you say, transphobic no matter what you say, etc, and that you are the second coming of you know what just for daring to vote differently. They pride themselves for being tolerant and open-minded while simultaneously being the most intolerant and judgmental people.

NP: this is my experience with TPK.

My family's run afoul of them for a few "transgressions," and the experiences have honestly left me so emotionally scarred that I've stopped trying to have any relationship or interaction with our community.

Now, you may think this is a "me" problem for being thin-skinned and weak... and perhaps it is. But I'm someone who was raised in a liberal religion, went to Quaker schools, votes Democrat across the board, doesn't own guns, supports immigration, etc. On paper I am a crunchy liberal. But these people and their toxic combination of affluence and disdain and carelessness, nearly broke my family apart.

There's a very rigid expectation about behavior, perhaps especially among Takoma Park women, that many of us mortals can't meet. Everything is passive aggressive. Tone is important. You should also probably apologize for any white privilege, (or bring up any bipoc ancestors), at least ten times in every conversation. It's performative, stultifying, and not at all fun.

Could you give an example of behavior "expectations" among Takoma Park women? I'm one, and I've never felt any pressure to be anything besides myself. I'm also pretty much the opposite of passive aggressive and I never worry about tone.

What conversations have you had where you needed to apologize for white privilege 10 times in every conversation? I've never apologized to anybody in Takoma Park for being White.

None of this makes sense. I doubt you ever lived in Takoma Park. You're probably a resident MAGA who's bored and slagging off the libs.

And let's just talk about how you capitalize the word "white."

You know who does that? Takoma park liberals and white supremacists. Funny, how liberal overcorrection leads to the same dismal place reached by fundies in Idaho. And by funny, I mean I'm lying: it's not funny.

DP - it triggers you to see White capitalized? Really?? Wow. Dude, it's just a convention. Calm down.

It's not a convention--or it wasn't until very recently. Black is capitalized when referring to a the Black identity. In America, the term has a specific meaning we can all get around: the identification of a group of people of African descent with shared history and culture. That definition includes both the tragedies and the triumphs of a collective past.

Capitalizing the word "white" has the effect of implying that "white" people should have a similar Identity. In Takoma Park, a place full of white people who have very little exposure to how this can go sideways, it probably seems fine. "Equitable," even. But it's not. What you're doing is legitimizing the kind of fake history that imagines there really is such a thing as a white race, and that this thing is a collective Identity.

Try to keep up. Not capitalizing "white" implies it's some kind of norm. Which it's not. That's why it's now capitalized.

Try and keep up... 'white' isn't an identity. Nor would you want to live in a world where it is one. The damage you people do when you're trying to be "correct" is not zero.

That's not what I said... I didn't say "white" is an identity. But "white" uncapitalized implies that it's the norm against which others are Black, Asian, et cetera. Plenty of folks are concerned about that implication, like
the MacArthur Foundation (https://www.macfound.org/press/perspectives/capitalizing-black-and-white-grammatical-justice-and-equity),
the Center for Study of Social Policy (https://cssp.org/2020/03/recognizing-race-in-language-why-we-capitalize-black-and-white/),
U Chicago and Black scholar Eve Zorn (https://zora.medium.com/im-a-black-scholar-who-studies-race-here-s-why-i-capitalize-white-f94883aa2dd3)
and this guy
(https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2020/07/22/why-white-should-be-capitalized/).

See also the National Association of Black Journalists (https://nabjonline.org/news-media-center/styleguide/).

All of which is confusing to the layperson and sort of underscores that the whole debate is taking place at a level that's way above practical concerns about equity and systemic oppression.

How are those articles confusing? I find it fascinating, that you're referencing articles that consider the topic and come to a different conclusion than I have and then conclude that the matter is so complex we should just defer to these "experts."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Behavioral expectations for Takoma Park women.

Recently, in the middle of rush hour, (it was noisy), I had to ask a stranger for a favor in Takoma Park. Had to ask her to move her car. She was sitting in a parking lot on her phone and she'd watched me try and maneuver my own car around hers in a crowded lot--and fail--for several minutes. I waved from my car to get her attention. She looked at me and turned away. I got out and knocked on her window. She opened the passenger side window--the one farthest from us both and asked me what I wanted. I explained. Of course, over the traffic noise, and so she could hear me at all, I had to raise my voice to do so.

She told me she didn't like my tone, and I had no need to be so rude when she was going to do me a favor.

In normal places I'd consider this a one-off, a miscommunication. I'm sure you'll eviscerate me forasking in the first place, or finding something wrong in that exchange. But it's quite typical of TPK.

In my experience living here, you ask for help with a stray cat you're feeding on the listserve, you get a lecture about how outdoor cats are bad. (I don't disagree.) Remember the shortages early in the pandemic? I offered my neighbors some of our supplies and got told that there were more needy and deserving people, and I really should be volunteering to help those less fortunate bipoc instead. Over the years exchanges like this have piled up. No, they're not the worst things in the world, bless their sheltered little trust fund hearts, my neighbors all mean well--but when they're not being remarkably passive aggressive and sanctimonious, they're just so socially constrained and afraid to cause offense that they're poor conversationalists. They don't have opinions, they have slogans. They're less neighbors than they are evangelicals, who are always quick to point out how love lives here and how diverse they are... as long as that doesn't mean they have to deal with fireworks, or anything on the other side of New Hampshire.

I won't convince any Takoma Park lovers... But again, they don't think there's anything wrong with capitalizing "White."

If these few things throw you off this much, I can't imagine you'd get along well anywhere. I mean, it sounds like you didn't get the pats on the back you were looking for when you posted publicly that you want to feed stray cats or give toilet paper to your neighbors. My advice is stay off of listservs because they are, inevitably, the province of toxic weirdos (which is maybe why you were there in the first place).

I am a center right UMC while male. I have no problem discussing anything around here. Some people disagree with me, and I'm fine with that. But one of the things I love about this town is that politics are just not discussed all that much--at least around me. And the other thing I've found is that when you speak truthfully and intelligently about social issues from the from a more traditional or conservative viewpoint, there are LOTS of people around here who agree.

The other thing I don't get is the feeling that TKPK politicians are annoying. Who even pays attention to the mayor and city council these days?

Anyway, I really enjoy it here. It has a great family friendly atmosphere, a nice downtown area, the junction (which is getting nicer), an interesting housing stock, and decent schools. Certainly some annoying people, but that's anywhere. They are far outnumbered, in my experience, by the really nice people I've encountered and made friends with over the years.

Golly, well, now the white dude has chimed in to mansplain that I'm just too sensitive. One reason you think so is ... How can I say this? Oh, yeah. It's because people don't hold you to the same standard. You've never had to navigate the toxic soup of TP playdates and PTA meetings. Have you?

The examples I brought up weren't ones that actually upset me... they're ones I feel comfortable talking about in a hostile forum full of people who can't stand to hear anything critical about themselves. You think I'd share the actually terrible things that happened? With this kind audience? Hah.

Like you, I don't have a problem sharing opinions. It's just one of my opinions is that this lovely, liberal, affluent bubble, much like all lovely liberal affluent bubbles everywhere, is built on the same bland indifference seen in McClean or Greenville--the biggest difference that I see, is residents here also want to be patted on the back for being the right kind of people. A lot.

Many of us find that tiresome.

I understand why you get along well with them... I wonder if your wife does.

I think the only toxic soup is what is sloshing around inside your head.

+1 Somehow PP doesn't feel "safe" to communicate actual incidents on an anonymous thread? Riiight.

Yeah. I don't. I've seen you all dox people before. Jeff deleted it, but it was ugly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Behavioral expectations for Takoma Park women.

Recently, in the middle of rush hour, (it was noisy), I had to ask a stranger for a favor in Takoma Park. Had to ask her to move her car. She was sitting in a parking lot on her phone and she'd watched me try and maneuver my own car around hers in a crowded lot--and fail--for several minutes. I waved from my car to get her attention. She looked at me and turned away. I got out and knocked on her window. She opened the passenger side window--the one farthest from us both and asked me what I wanted. I explained. Of course, over the traffic noise, and so she could hear me at all, I had to raise my voice to do so.

She told me she didn't like my tone, and I had no need to be so rude when she was going to do me a favor.

In normal places I'd consider this a one-off, a miscommunication. I'm sure you'll eviscerate me forasking in the first place, or finding something wrong in that exchange. But it's quite typical of TPK.

In my experience living here, you ask for help with a stray cat you're feeding on the listserve, you get a lecture about how outdoor cats are bad. (I don't disagree.) Remember the shortages early in the pandemic? I offered my neighbors some of our supplies and got told that there were more needy and deserving people, and I really should be volunteering to help those less fortunate bipoc instead. Over the years exchanges like this have piled up. No, they're not the worst things in the world, bless their sheltered little trust fund hearts, my neighbors all mean well--but when they're not being remarkably passive aggressive and sanctimonious, they're just so socially constrained and afraid to cause offense that they're poor conversationalists. They don't have opinions, they have slogans. They're less neighbors than they are evangelicals, who are always quick to point out how love lives here and how diverse they are... as long as that doesn't mean they have to deal with fireworks, or anything on the other side of New Hampshire.

I won't convince any Takoma Park lovers... But again, they don't think there's anything wrong with capitalizing "White."

If these few things throw you off this much, I can't imagine you'd get along well anywhere. I mean, it sounds like you didn't get the pats on the back you were looking for when you posted publicly that you want to feed stray cats or give toilet paper to your neighbors. My advice is stay off of listservs because they are, inevitably, the province of toxic weirdos (which is maybe why you were there in the first place).

I am a center right UMC while male. I have no problem discussing anything around here. Some people disagree with me, and I'm fine with that. But one of the things I love about this town is that politics are just not discussed all that much--at least around me. And the other thing I've found is that when you speak truthfully and intelligently about social issues from the from a more traditional or conservative viewpoint, there are LOTS of people around here who agree.

The other thing I don't get is the feeling that TKPK politicians are annoying. Who even pays attention to the mayor and city council these days?

Anyway, I really enjoy it here. It has a great family friendly atmosphere, a nice downtown area, the junction (which is getting nicer), an interesting housing stock, and decent schools. Certainly some annoying people, but that's anywhere. They are far outnumbered, in my experience, by the really nice people I've encountered and made friends with over the years.

Golly, well, now the white dude has chimed in to mansplain that I'm just too sensitive. One reason you think so is ... How can I say this? Oh, yeah. It's because people don't hold you to the same standard. You've never had to navigate the toxic soup of TP playdates and PTA meetings. Have you?

The examples I brought up weren't ones that actually upset me... they're ones I feel comfortable talking about in a hostile forum full of people who can't stand to hear anything critical about themselves. You think I'd share the actually terrible things that happened? With this kind audience? Hah.

Like you, I don't have a problem sharing opinions. It's just one of my opinions is that this lovely, liberal, affluent bubble, much like all lovely liberal affluent bubbles everywhere, is built on the same bland indifference seen in McClean or Greenville--the biggest difference that I see, is residents here also want to be patted on the back for being the right kind of people. A lot.

Many of us find that tiresome.

I understand why you get along well with them... I wonder if your wife does.

I think the only toxic soup is what is sloshing around inside your head.

+1 Somehow PP doesn't feel "safe" to communicate actual incidents on an anonymous thread? Riiight.

Yeah. I don't. I've seen you all dox people before. Jeff deleted it, but it was ugly.

You must have committed some egregious missteps if you feel detailing them would make you identifiable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Behavioral expectations for Takoma Park women.

Recently, in the middle of rush hour, (it was noisy), I had to ask a stranger for a favor in Takoma Park. Had to ask her to move her car. She was sitting in a parking lot on her phone and she'd watched me try and maneuver my own car around hers in a crowded lot--and fail--for several minutes. I waved from my car to get her attention. She looked at me and turned away. I got out and knocked on her window. She opened the passenger side window--the one farthest from us both and asked me what I wanted. I explained. Of course, over the traffic noise, and so she could hear me at all, I had to raise my voice to do so.

She told me she didn't like my tone, and I had no need to be so rude when she was going to do me a favor.

In normal places I'd consider this a one-off, a miscommunication. I'm sure you'll eviscerate me forasking in the first place, or finding something wrong in that exchange. But it's quite typical of TPK.

In my experience living here, you ask for help with a stray cat you're feeding on the listserve, you get a lecture about how outdoor cats are bad. (I don't disagree.) Remember the shortages early in the pandemic? I offered my neighbors some of our supplies and got told that there were more needy and deserving people, and I really should be volunteering to help those less fortunate bipoc instead. Over the years exchanges like this have piled up. No, they're not the worst things in the world, bless their sheltered little trust fund hearts, my neighbors all mean well--but when they're not being remarkably passive aggressive and sanctimonious, they're just so socially constrained and afraid to cause offense that they're poor conversationalists. They don't have opinions, they have slogans. They're less neighbors than they are evangelicals, who are always quick to point out how love lives here and how diverse they are... as long as that doesn't mean they have to deal with fireworks, or anything on the other side of New Hampshire.

I won't convince any Takoma Park lovers... But again, they don't think there's anything wrong with capitalizing "White."

If these few things throw you off this much, I can't imagine you'd get along well anywhere. I mean, it sounds like you didn't get the pats on the back you were looking for when you posted publicly that you want to feed stray cats or give toilet paper to your neighbors. My advice is stay off of listservs because they are, inevitably, the province of toxic weirdos (which is maybe why you were there in the first place).

I am a center right UMC while male. I have no problem discussing anything around here. Some people disagree with me, and I'm fine with that. But one of the things I love about this town is that politics are just not discussed all that much--at least around me. And the other thing I've found is that when you speak truthfully and intelligently about social issues from the from a more traditional or conservative viewpoint, there are LOTS of people around here who agree.

The other thing I don't get is the feeling that TKPK politicians are annoying. Who even pays attention to the mayor and city council these days?

Anyway, I really enjoy it here. It has a great family friendly atmosphere, a nice downtown area, the junction (which is getting nicer), an interesting housing stock, and decent schools. Certainly some annoying people, but that's anywhere. They are far outnumbered, in my experience, by the really nice people I've encountered and made friends with over the years.

Golly, well, now the white dude has chimed in to mansplain that I'm just too sensitive. One reason you think so is ... How can I say this? Oh, yeah. It's because people don't hold you to the same standard. You've never had to navigate the toxic soup of TP playdates and PTA meetings. Have you?

The examples I brought up weren't ones that actually upset me... they're ones I feel comfortable talking about in a hostile forum full of people who can't stand to hear anything critical about themselves. You think I'd share the actually terrible things that happened? With this kind audience? Hah.

Like you, I don't have a problem sharing opinions. It's just one of my opinions is that this lovely, liberal, affluent bubble, much like all lovely liberal affluent bubbles everywhere, is built on the same bland indifference seen in McClean or Greenville--the biggest difference that I see, is residents here also want to be patted on the back for being the right kind of people. A lot.

Many of us find that tiresome.

I understand why you get along well with them... I wonder if your wife does.

I think the only toxic soup is what is sloshing around inside your head.

+1 Somehow PP doesn't feel "safe" to communicate actual incidents on an anonymous thread? Riiight.

Yeah. I don't. I've seen you all dox people before. Jeff deleted it, but it was ugly.

You must have committed some egregious missteps if you feel detailing them would make you identifiable.

You're right. I used plastic shopping bags and put dairy in with my compost.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Behavioral expectations for Takoma Park women.

Recently, in the middle of rush hour, (it was noisy), I had to ask a stranger for a favor in Takoma Park. Had to ask her to move her car. She was sitting in a parking lot on her phone and she'd watched me try and maneuver my own car around hers in a crowded lot--and fail--for several minutes. I waved from my car to get her attention. She looked at me and turned away. I got out and knocked on her window. She opened the passenger side window--the one farthest from us both and asked me what I wanted. I explained. Of course, over the traffic noise, and so she could hear me at all, I had to raise my voice to do so.

She told me she didn't like my tone, and I had no need to be so rude when she was going to do me a favor.

In normal places I'd consider this a one-off, a miscommunication. I'm sure you'll eviscerate me forasking in the first place, or finding something wrong in that exchange. But it's quite typical of TPK.

In my experience living here, you ask for help with a stray cat you're feeding on the listserve, you get a lecture about how outdoor cats are bad. (I don't disagree.) Remember the shortages early in the pandemic? I offered my neighbors some of our supplies and got told that there were more needy and deserving people, and I really should be volunteering to help those less fortunate bipoc instead. Over the years exchanges like this have piled up. No, they're not the worst things in the world, bless their sheltered little trust fund hearts, my neighbors all mean well--but when they're not being remarkably passive aggressive and sanctimonious, they're just so socially constrained and afraid to cause offense that they're poor conversationalists. They don't have opinions, they have slogans. They're less neighbors than they are evangelicals, who are always quick to point out how love lives here and how diverse they are... as long as that doesn't mean they have to deal with fireworks, or anything on the other side of New Hampshire.

I won't convince any Takoma Park lovers... But again, they don't think there's anything wrong with capitalizing "White."

If these few things throw you off this much, I can't imagine you'd get along well anywhere. I mean, it sounds like you didn't get the pats on the back you were looking for when you posted publicly that you want to feed stray cats or give toilet paper to your neighbors. My advice is stay off of listservs because they are, inevitably, the province of toxic weirdos (which is maybe why you were there in the first place).

I am a center right UMC while male. I have no problem discussing anything around here. Some people disagree with me, and I'm fine with that. But one of the things I love about this town is that politics are just not discussed all that much--at least around me. And the other thing I've found is that when you speak truthfully and intelligently about social issues from the from a more traditional or conservative viewpoint, there are LOTS of people around here who agree.

The other thing I don't get is the feeling that TKPK politicians are annoying. Who even pays attention to the mayor and city council these days?

Anyway, I really enjoy it here. It has a great family friendly atmosphere, a nice downtown area, the junction (which is getting nicer), an interesting housing stock, and decent schools. Certainly some annoying people, but that's anywhere. They are far outnumbered, in my experience, by the really nice people I've encountered and made friends with over the years.

Golly, well, now the white dude has chimed in to mansplain that I'm just too sensitive. One reason you think so is ... How can I say this? Oh, yeah. It's because people don't hold you to the same standard. You've never had to navigate the toxic soup of TP playdates and PTA meetings. Have you?

The examples I brought up weren't ones that actually upset me... they're ones I feel comfortable talking about in a hostile forum full of people who can't stand to hear anything critical about themselves. You think I'd share the actually terrible things that happened? With this kind audience? Hah.

Like you, I don't have a problem sharing opinions. It's just one of my opinions is that this lovely, liberal, affluent bubble, much like all lovely liberal affluent bubbles everywhere, is built on the same bland indifference seen in McClean or Greenville--the biggest difference that I see, is residents here also want to be patted on the back for being the right kind of people. A lot.

Many of us find that tiresome.

I understand why you get along well with them... I wonder if your wife does.

I think the only toxic soup is what is sloshing around inside your head.

+1 Somehow PP doesn't feel "safe" to communicate actual incidents on an anonymous thread? Riiight.

Yeah. I don't. I've seen you all dox people before. Jeff deleted it, but it was ugly.

You must have committed some egregious missteps if you feel detailing them would make you identifiable.

But in all seriousness, perhaps you could stop breathlessly pretending you're one of the nice villagers in a Shirley Jackson story? No? Well, thanks for reminding me why I don't like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a safe, "Bethesda-esque" area / section in Tacoma Park, MD?

North Takoma is one safe area, although the hater here will try to convince you gangs are having shoot-outs on the college campus. Best to ignore them.

PS, this is the area around Montgomery College

There are lots of areas of Takoma Park that are quite safe. As safe as the parts of Bethesda closer to DC/Bethesda Metro. For example, the "between the creeks" area seems pretty safe, and the historic parts closer to the metro. You are not going to find places that are as "safe" as the outlying areas of Bethesda. I live in TKPK and don't find it dangerous or scary at all, so I'm not biased against TKPK.

But would you feel comfortable walking at night alone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a safe, "Bethesda-esque" area / section in Tacoma Park, MD?

North Takoma is one safe area, although the hater here will try to convince you gangs are having shoot-outs on the college campus. Best to ignore them.

Note: I haven't said one word about crime. I'm not scared of gangs. I just really don't like smug affluent people who are also cruel.

--tp hater

Are there gangs in north Tacoma?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"I only have a two-car garage, so obviously this poster isn't talking about me. Also that proves they are lying."

And to think, some of you went to law school.

You people never, ever change.

Most new builds in TkPK aren't new builds... Technically, although when you deconstruct an original bungalow down to its footprint and make it a 4-6k square foot house, you're just playing with zoning laws cause you can. Sorry I never looked closely enough at the new real estate on Geneva (historically where TpK put its Black community), to count the garage bays. Just drove by the huge ugly-ass new builds and said wtf.

I love how you attack my credibility, but don't deny that I'm entirely correct about your character. In fact, in our exchange you've kept showing precisely how arrogant, insular, petty, pedantic, and cruel y'all so often are.

I’m willing to bet there are zero 4-car garages anywhere in Takoma Park.

You have no credibility because of claims like this, and your histrionics and insults. You probably don’t get along anywhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a safe, "Bethesda-esque" area / section in Tacoma Park, MD?

North Takoma is one safe area, although the hater here will try to convince you gangs are having shoot-outs on the college campus. Best to ignore them.

Note: I haven't said one word about crime. I'm not scared of gangs. I just really don't like smug affluent people who are also cruel.

--tp hater

Are there gangs in north Tacoma?

lol, I live there, and of course not

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"I only have a two-car garage, so obviously this poster isn't talking about me. Also that proves they are lying."

And to think, some of you went to law school.

You people never, ever change.

Most new builds in TkPK aren't new builds... Technically, although when you deconstruct an original bungalow down to its footprint and make it a 4-6k square foot house, you're just playing with zoning laws cause you can. Sorry I never looked closely enough at the new real estate on Geneva (historically where TpK put its Black community), to count the garage bays. Just drove by the huge ugly-ass new builds and said wtf.

I love how you attack my credibility, but don't deny that I'm entirely correct about your character. In fact, in our exchange you've kept showing precisely how arrogant, insular, petty, pedantic, and cruel y'all so often are.

I’m willing to bet there are zero 4-car garages anywhere in Takoma Park.

You have no credibility because of claims like this, and your histrionics and insults. You probably don’t get along anywhere.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you define “woke”?

Is the opposite “asleep”?

If you want to live somewhere “asleep,” maybe Reston is good for you.

Virtue signaling, dogmatic, ideological people who firmly believe they're on the right side of history and sneer at those who don't agree with them as lesser species. You know, the people who call you racist no matter what you say, transphobic no matter what you say, etc, and that you are the second coming of you know what just for daring to vote differently. They pride themselves for being tolerant and open-minded while simultaneously being the most intolerant and judgmental people.

NP: this is my experience with TPK.

My family's run afoul of them for a few "transgressions," and the experiences have honestly left me so emotionally scarred that I've stopped trying to have any relationship or interaction with our community.

Now, you may think this is a "me" problem for being thin-skinned and weak... and perhaps it is. But I'm someone who was raised in a liberal religion, went to Quaker schools, votes Democrat across the board, doesn't own guns, supports immigration, etc. On paper I am a crunchy liberal. But these people and their toxic combination of affluence and disdain and carelessness, nearly broke my family apart.

There's a very rigid expectation about behavior, perhaps especially among Takoma Park women, that many of us mortals can't meet. Everything is passive aggressive. Tone is important. You should also probably apologize for any white privilege, (or bring up any bipoc ancestors), at least ten times in every conversation. It's performative, stultifying, and not at all fun.

Could you give an example of behavior "expectations" among Takoma Park women? I'm one, and I've never felt any pressure to be anything besides myself. I'm also pretty much the opposite of passive aggressive and I never worry about tone.

What conversations have you had where you needed to apologize for white privilege 10 times in every conversation? I've never apologized to anybody in Takoma Park for being White.

None of this makes sense. I doubt you ever lived in Takoma Park. You're probably a resident MAGA who's bored and slagging off the libs.

And let's just talk about how you capitalize the word "white."

You know who does that? Takoma park liberals and white supremacists. Funny, how liberal overcorrection leads to the same dismal place reached by fundies in Idaho. And by funny, I mean I'm lying: it's not funny.

DP - it triggers you to see White capitalized? Really?? Wow. Dude, it's just a convention. Calm down.

It's not a convention--or it wasn't until very recently. Black is capitalized when referring to a the Black identity. In America, the term has a specific meaning we can all get around: the identification of a group of people of African descent with shared history and culture. That definition includes both the tragedies and the triumphs of a collective past.

Capitalizing the word "white" has the effect of implying that "white" people should have a similar Identity. In Takoma Park, a place full of white people who have very little exposure to how this can go sideways, it probably seems fine. "Equitable," even. But it's not. What you're doing is legitimizing the kind of fake history that imagines there really is such a thing as a white race, and that this thing is a collective Identity.

Try to keep up. Not capitalizing "white" implies it's some kind of norm. Which it's not. That's why it's now capitalized.

Try and keep up... 'white' isn't an identity. Nor would you want to live in a world where it is one. The damage you people do when you're trying to be "correct" is not zero.

That's not what I said... I didn't say "white" is an identity. But "white" uncapitalized implies that it's the norm against which others are Black, Asian, et cetera. Plenty of folks are concerned about that implication, like
the MacArthur Foundation (https://www.macfound.org/press/perspectives/capitalizing-black-and-white-grammatical-justice-and-equity),
the Center for Study of Social Policy (https://cssp.org/2020/03/recognizing-race-in-language-why-we-capitalize-black-and-white/),
U Chicago and Black scholar Eve Zorn (https://zora.medium.com/im-a-black-scholar-who-studies-race-here-s-why-i-capitalize-white-f94883aa2dd3)
and this guy
(https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2020/07/22/why-white-should-be-capitalized/).

See also the National Association of Black Journalists (https://nabjonline.org/news-media-center/styleguide/).

All of which is confusing to the layperson and sort of underscores that the whole debate is taking place at a level that's way above practical concerns about equity and systemic oppression.

How are those articles confusing? I find it fascinating, that you're referencing articles that consider the topic and come to a different conclusion than I have and then conclude that the matter is so complex we should just defer to these "experts."

It’s confusing if you’re a layperson who has to read multiple articles, many of which disagree with each other, to understand it. Laypeople aren’t going to do that.

Anyway, it’s hard to read those articles and come to a different conclusion.

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Anonymous wrote:Behavioral expectations for Takoma Park women.

Recently, in the middle of rush hour, (it was noisy), I had to ask a stranger for a favor in Takoma Park. Had to ask her to move her car. She was sitting in a parking lot on her phone and she'd watched me try and maneuver my own car around hers in a crowded lot--and fail--for several minutes. I waved from my car to get her attention. She looked at me and turned away. I got out and knocked on her window. She opened the passenger side window--the one farthest from us both and asked me what I wanted. I explained. Of course, over the traffic noise, and so she could hear me at all, I had to raise my voice to do so.

She told me she didn't like my tone, and I had no need to be so rude when she was going to do me a favor.

In normal places I'd consider this a one-off, a miscommunication. I'm sure you'll eviscerate me forasking in the first place, or finding something wrong in that exchange. But it's quite typical of TPK.

In my experience living here, you ask for help with a stray cat you're feeding on the listserve, you get a lecture about how outdoor cats are bad. (I don't disagree.) Remember the shortages early in the pandemic? I offered my neighbors some of our supplies and got told that there were more needy and deserving people, and I really should be volunteering to help those less fortunate bipoc instead. Over the years exchanges like this have piled up. No, they're not the worst things in the world, bless their sheltered little trust fund hearts, my neighbors all mean well--but when they're not being remarkably passive aggressive and sanctimonious, they're just so socially constrained and afraid to cause offense that they're poor conversationalists. They don't have opinions, they have slogans. They're less neighbors than they are evangelicals, who are always quick to point out how love lives here and how diverse they are... as long as that doesn't mean they have to deal with fireworks, or anything on the other side of New Hampshire.

I won't convince any Takoma Park lovers... But again, they don't think there's anything wrong with capitalizing "White."

If these few things throw you off this much, I can't imagine you'd get along well anywhere. I mean, it sounds like you didn't get the pats on the back you were looking for when you posted publicly that you want to feed stray cats or give toilet paper to your neighbors. My advice is stay off of listservs because they are, inevitably, the province of toxic weirdos (which is maybe why you were there in the first place).

I am a center right UMC while male. I have no problem discussing anything around here. Some people disagree with me, and I'm fine with that. But one of the things I love about this town is that politics are just not discussed all that much--at least around me. And the other thing I've found is that when you speak truthfully and intelligently about social issues from the from a more traditional or conservative viewpoint, there are LOTS of people around here who agree.

The other thing I don't get is the feeling that TKPK politicians are annoying. Who even pays attention to the mayor and city council these days?

Anyway, I really enjoy it here. It has a great family friendly atmosphere, a nice downtown area, the junction (which is getting nicer), an interesting housing stock, and decent schools. Certainly some annoying people, but that's anywhere. They are far outnumbered, in my experience, by the really nice people I've encountered and made friends with over the years.

Golly, well, now the white dude has chimed in to mansplain that I'm just too sensitive. One reason you think so is ... How can I say this? Oh, yeah. It's because people don't hold you to the same standard. You've never had to navigate the toxic soup of TP playdates and PTA meetings. Have you?

The examples I brought up weren't ones that actually upset me... they're ones I feel comfortable talking about in a hostile forum full of people who can't stand to hear anything critical about themselves. You think I'd share the actually terrible things that happened? With this kind audience? Hah.

Like you, I don't have a problem sharing opinions. It's just one of my opinions is that this lovely, liberal, affluent bubble, much like all lovely liberal affluent bubbles everywhere, is built on the same bland indifference seen in McClean or Greenville--the biggest difference that I see, is residents here also want to be patted on the back for being the right kind of people. A lot.

Many of us find that tiresome.

I understand why you get along well with them... I wonder if your wife does.

I think the only toxic soup is what is sloshing around inside your head.

+1 Somehow PP doesn't feel "safe" to communicate actual incidents on an anonymous thread? Riiight.

Yeah. I don't. I've seen you all dox people before. Jeff deleted it, but it was ugly.

You must have committed some egregious missteps if you feel detailing them would make you identifiable.

Exactly. If she’s this shrill and hateful about a place she doesn’t even live in anymore, what other bull-in-a-chinashop wreckage is she responsible for?

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Anonymous wrote:Is there a safe, "Bethesda-esque" area / section in Tacoma Park, MD?

North Takoma is one safe area, although the hater here will try to convince you gangs are having shoot-outs on the college campus. Best to ignore them.

Note: I haven't said one word about crime. I'm not scared of gangs. I just really don't like smug affluent people who are also cruel.

--tp hater

Are there gangs in north Tacoma?

lol, I live there, and of course not

Isn't Tacoma in Washington State?