IAC Lacrosse 2019 Season

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS's school included everyone last year, and it was a great experience for the whole team. This year, they decided ahead of time to take only juniors and seniors and a few select sophomores who they assume will move up. It's my kid's issue to deal with, but I could not feel worse about the coach and team now. Coach has separated players into JV and Varsity long before tryouts. Even if his instincts are correct, how can he possibly think those sophomores who don't make varsity are going to believe for one second that they were given a real shot? This school is constantly making moves like this regarding sports and they are not even strong.

That is why you are a parent and not a coach. Stay out of things you have no clue about. Dealing with insane parents is one of the worst parts of coaching. If your son is not deemed to be part of this team, stop blaming others.

NP here. While some parents are quite annoying, in most cases, around here especially, they are highly educated, successful people who just can't understand the bone-headed decisions that these lax bro coaches make. Being a lacrosse coach is not brain surgery. It's just not that hard to make good decisions, but so many coaches couldn't be successful at much else and get on bizarre highs because they have control over teenagers and axes to grind with their parents. Are you a coach? You should have at least a basic understanding that parents are paying a lot of money for their kids to be at these schools. They have a right to understand why coaches would lack such common sense.

The coach's motivation is doing what's best for his players and his program. Unfortunately, there are a lot of idiotic parents like you who think they know best as to the roster, who starts, who goes on a spring break trip, etc.

The fact that you cite that you pay a lot of money as justification as to why your opinion counts is why more and more coaches are quitting rather than dealing with nightmare helicopter parents. Let the coach coach and please shut up.

Another NP. I disagree with your justifications and approach, PP. I can certainly see that you might be a coach with your attitude. You see money as the issue but really money is only the outcome of other attributes that make the parent's input important.

The first NP is correct - especially in this area, parents are very highly educated and successful in their high level careers, which translates to a certain level of affluence that makes supporting a club possible.

These parents are used to making difficult and higher-level decisions as part of their everyday lives. When they see some of the poor choices made by the coaches, the parents are used to expressing their disappointment and offering solutions. A good coach will recognize that if there is enough feedback in a similar vein, then they should apply the feedback. A bad coach won't.

This goes beyond normal laments like playing time or positions. It is more about functionality of a team, efficacy of position assignments so that skilled players are placed in the positions where they are needed the most, the range of plays developed, the caliber of practice, the choices of tournaments, etc.

IME as a parent of a child who plays D1 lax for a very well-regarded team, and as a parent of other children who play other sports at the top levels of their games, meaning I see A LOT of teams, most club coaches do have a love of their sport...but they also see the easy money and they like the authority. However, most importantly, they need the ego boost because they are still living in their glory days and they like/encourage the fawning behavior that is so aggravating to the rest of us who just want our kids to play a good game on a good team. You need to get the chip off of your shoulder about a coach being sacrosanct and start realizing that 360 feedback is important to winning games AND to making money as a club.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS's school included everyone last year, and it was a great experience for the whole team. This year, they decided ahead of time to take only juniors and seniors and a few select sophomores who they assume will move up. It's my kid's issue to deal with, but I could not feel worse about the coach and team now. Coach has separated players into JV and Varsity long before tryouts. Even if his instincts are correct, how can he possibly think those sophomores who don't make varsity are going to believe for one second that they were given a real shot? This school is constantly making moves like this regarding sports and they are not even strong.

That is why you are a parent and not a coach. Stay out of things you have no clue about. Dealing with insane parents is one of the worst parts of coaching. If your son is not deemed to be part of this team, stop blaming others.

NP here. While some parents are quite annoying, in most cases, around here especially, they are highly educated, successful people who just can't understand the bone-headed decisions that these lax bro coaches make. Being a lacrosse coach is not brain surgery. It's just not that hard to make good decisions, but so many coaches couldn't be successful at much else and get on bizarre highs because they have control over teenagers and axes to grind with their parents. Are you a coach? You should have at least a basic understanding that parents are paying a lot of money for their kids to be at these schools. They have a right to understand why coaches would lack such common sense.

The coach's motivation is doing what's best for his players and his program. Unfortunately, there are a lot of idiotic parents like you who think they know best as to the roster, who starts, who goes on a spring break trip, etc.

The fact that you cite that you pay a lot of money as justification as to why your opinion counts is why more and more coaches are quitting rather than dealing with nightmare helicopter parents. Let the coach coach and please shut up.

Another NP. I disagree with your justifications and approach, PP. I can certainly see that you might be a coach with your attitude. You see money as the issue but really money is only the outcome of other attributes that make the parent's input important.

The first NP is correct - especially in this area, parents are very highly educated and successful in their high level careers, which translates to a certain level of affluence that makes supporting a club possible.

These parents are used to making difficult and higher-level decisions as part of their everyday lives. When they see some of the poor choices made by the coaches, the parents are used to expressing their disappointment and offering solutions. A good coach will recognize that if there is enough feedback in a similar vein, then they should apply the feedback. A bad coach won't.

This goes beyond normal laments like playing time or positions. It is more about functionality of a team, efficacy of position assignments so that skilled players are placed in the positions where they are needed the most, the range of plays developed, the caliber of practice, the choices of tournaments, etc.

IME as a parent of a child who plays D1 lax for a very well-regarded team, and as a parent of other children who play other sports at the top levels of their games, meaning I see A LOT of teams, most club coaches do have a love of their sport...but they also see the easy money and they like the authority. However, most importantly, they need the ego boost because they are still living in their glory days and they like/encourage the fawning behavior that is so aggravating to the rest of us who just want our kids to play a good game on a good team. You need to get the chip off of your shoulder about a coach being sacrosanct and start realizing that 360 feedback is important to winning games AND to making money as a club.

Very thoughtful response. Folks may not know everything about the sport but they sure know when their kids are being excluded/ Have seen a freshman who will be a likely backup for the next 3 years being treated like a full member of this team, both the kid and parents are happy and will continue to invest in the sport and school. This coach knows what he's doing with a culture of accountability and inclusion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS's school included everyone last year, and it was a great experience for the whole team. This year, they decided ahead of time to take only juniors and seniors and a few select sophomores who they assume will move up. It's my kid's issue to deal with, but I could not feel worse about the coach and team now. Coach has separated players into JV and Varsity long before tryouts. Even if his instincts are correct, how can he possibly think those sophomores who don't make varsity are going to believe for one second that they were given a real shot? This school is constantly making moves like this regarding sports and they are not even strong.

That is why you are a parent and not a coach. Stay out of things you have no clue about. Dealing with insane parents is one of the worst parts of coaching. If your son is not deemed to be part of this team, stop blaming others.

NP here. While some parents are quite annoying, in most cases, around here especially, they are highly educated, successful people who just can't understand the bone-headed decisions that these lax bro coaches make. Being a lacrosse coach is not brain surgery. It's just not that hard to make good decisions, but so many coaches couldn't be successful at much else and get on bizarre highs because they have control over teenagers and axes to grind with their parents. Are you a coach? You should have at least a basic understanding that parents are paying a lot of money for their kids to be at these schools. They have a right to understand why coaches would lack such common sense.

The coach's motivation is doing what's best for his players and his program. Unfortunately, there are a lot of idiotic parents like you who think they know best as to the roster, who starts, who goes on a spring break trip, etc.

The fact that you cite that you pay a lot of money as justification as to why your opinion counts is why more and more coaches are quitting rather than dealing with nightmare helicopter parents. Let the coach coach and please shut up.

Another NP. I disagree with your justifications and approach, PP. I can certainly see that you might be a coach with your attitude. You see money as the issue but really money is only the outcome of other attributes that make the parent's input important.

The first NP is correct - especially in this area, parents are very highly educated and successful in their high level careers, which translates to a certain level of affluence that makes supporting a club possible.

These parents are used to making difficult and higher-level decisions as part of their everyday lives. When they see some of the poor choices made by the coaches, the parents are used to expressing their disappointment and offering solutions. A good coach will recognize that if there is enough feedback in a similar vein, then they should apply the feedback. A bad coach won't.

This goes beyond normal laments like playing time or positions. It is more about functionality of a team, efficacy of position assignments so that skilled players are placed in the positions where they are needed the most, the range of plays developed, the caliber of practice, the choices of tournaments, etc.

IME as a parent of a child who plays D1 lax for a very well-regarded team, and as a parent of other children who play other sports at the top levels of their games, meaning I see A LOT of teams, most club coaches do have a love of their sport...but they also see the easy money and they like the authority. However, most importantly, they need the ego boost because they are still living in their glory days and they like/encourage the fawning behavior that is so aggravating to the rest of us who just want our kids to play a good game on a good team. You need to get the chip off of your shoulder about a coach being sacrosanct and start realizing that 360 feedback is important to winning games AND to making money as a club.

What a nightmare you must be. Because a parent is successful and/or wealthy justifies interfering with coaching? LOL.

[Anonymous]

Why can't a parent ask "why" to a coach or a teacher or a boss or a co-worker? The best coaches get out in front and explain the team and this diffuses a lot of potential bad situations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why can't a parent ask "why" to a coach or a teacher or a boss or a co-worker? The best coaches get out in front and explain the team and this diffuses a lot of potential bad situations.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS's school included everyone last year, and it was a great experience for the whole team. This year, they decided ahead of time to take only juniors and seniors and a few select sophomores who they assume will move up. It's my kid's issue to deal with, but I could not feel worse about the coach and team now. Coach has separated players into JV and Varsity long before tryouts. Even if his instincts are correct, how can he possibly think those sophomores who don't make varsity are going to believe for one second that they were given a real shot? This school is constantly making moves like this regarding sports and they are not even strong.

That is why you are a parent and not a coach. Stay out of things you have no clue about. Dealing with insane parents is one of the worst parts of coaching. If your son is not deemed to be part of this team, stop blaming others.

NP here. While some parents are quite annoying, in most cases, around here especially, they are highly educated, successful people who just can't understand the bone-headed decisions that these lax bro coaches make. Being a lacrosse coach is not brain surgery. It's just not that hard to make good decisions, but so many coaches couldn't be successful at much else and get on bizarre highs because they have control over teenagers and axes to grind with their parents. Are you a coach? You should have at least a basic understanding that parents are paying a lot of money for their kids to be at these schools. They have a right to understand why coaches would lack such common sense.

The coach's motivation is doing what's best for his players and his program. Unfortunately, there are a lot of idiotic parents like you who think they know best as to the roster, who starts, who goes on a spring break trip, etc.

The fact that you cite that you pay a lot of money as justification as to why your opinion counts is why more and more coaches are quitting rather than dealing with nightmare helicopter parents. Let the coach coach and please shut up.

Another NP. I disagree with your justifications and approach, PP. I can certainly see that you might be a coach with your attitude. You see money as the issue but really money is only the outcome of other attributes that make the parent's input important.

The first NP is correct - especially in this area, parents are very highly educated and successful in their high level careers, which translates to a certain level of affluence that makes supporting a club possible.

These parents are used to making difficult and higher-level decisions as part of their everyday lives. When they see some of the poor choices made by the coaches, the parents are used to expressing their disappointment and offering solutions. A good coach will recognize that if there is enough feedback in a similar vein, then they should apply the feedback. A bad coach won't.

This goes beyond normal laments like playing time or positions. It is more about functionality of a team, efficacy of position assignments so that skilled players are placed in the positions where they are needed the most, the range of plays developed, the caliber of practice, the choices of tournaments, etc.

IME as a parent of a child who plays D1 lax for a very well-regarded team, and as a parent of other children who play other sports at the top levels of their games, meaning I see A LOT of teams, most club coaches do have a love of their sport...but they also see the easy money and they like the authority. However, most importantly, they need the ego boost because they are still living in their glory days and they like/encourage the fawning behavior that is so aggravating to the rest of us who just want our kids to play a good game on a good team. You need to get the chip off of your shoulder about a coach being sacrosanct and start realizing that 360 feedback is important to winning games AND to making money as a club.

What a nightmare you must be. Because a parent is successful and/or wealthy justifies interfering with coaching? LOL.

Actually the parent sounds pretty reasonable - they aren't picking lineups, etc . PP coach sounds insecure but may be that's partly why they are in that position - it's easy to ride roughshod over a bunch of kids. Did you get called into the AD's office to have a chat about your lack of communication w/ parents?

[Anonymous]

Mentor your kids at home on how to handle themselves and their own affairs and leave their Athletic endeavor's between them and their coaches.

When they go off to college one day, is mommy and daddy gonna call up the Lacrosse coach then too or is the young man you raised going to handle his own business?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mentor your kids at home on how to handle themselves and their own affairs and leave their Athletic endeavor's between them and their coaches.

When they go off to college one day, is mommy and daddy gonna call up the Lacrosse coach then too or is the young man you raised going to handle his own business?

There is a huge difference in the role I expect my 20 year old son to take in his relationship with his D1 coach and the role I expected him to take in his relationship with his travel coach when he was 14. If you don't understand this then you should not be working with kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mentor your kids at home on how to handle themselves and their own affairs and leave their Athletic endeavor's between them and their coaches.

When they go off to college one day, is mommy and daddy gonna call up the Lacrosse coach then too or is the young man you raised going to handle his own business?

Funny how teachers are only to happy to address parents concerns but again they are educators, not candy ass coaches who can operate within a power imbalance. And if there’s hazing or abuse, they knew about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mentor your kids at home on how to handle themselves and their own affairs and leave their Athletic endeavor's between them and their coaches.

When they go off to college one day, is mommy and daddy gonna call up the Lacrosse coach then too or is the young man you raised going to handle his own business?

There is a huge difference in the role I expect my 20 year old son to take in his relationship with his D1 coach and the role I expected him to take in his relationship with his travel coach when he was 14. If you don't understand this then you should not be working with kids.

What you teach your teenager now is what determines how he handles himself at 18 in college you dimwit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mentor your kids at home on how to handle themselves and their own affairs and leave their Athletic endeavor's between them and their coaches.

When they go off to college one day, is mommy and daddy gonna call up the Lacrosse coach then too or is the young man you raised going to handle his own business?

There is a huge difference in the role I expect my 20 year old son to take in his relationship with his D1 coach and the role I expected him to take in his relationship with his travel coach when he was 14. If you don't understand this then you should not be working with kids.

What you teach your teenager now is what determines how he handles himself at 18 in college you dimwit.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USA_Gymnastics_sex_abuse_scandal

https://www.ctvnews.ca/theo-fleury-details-sexual-abuse-by-hockey-coach-1.442123

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jerry_Sandusky

Yes, let's trust and not get involved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mentor your kids at home on how to handle themselves and their own affairs and leave their Athletic endeavor's between them and their coaches.

When they go off to college one day, is mommy and daddy gonna call up the Lacrosse coach then too or is the young man you raised going to handle his own business?

There is a huge difference in the role I expect my 20 year old son to take in his relationship with his D1 coach and the role I expected him to take in his relationship with his travel coach when he was 14. If you don't understand this then you should not be working with kids.

What you teach your teenager now is what determines how he handles himself at 18 in college you dimwit.

The man who is coaching your young men, people. Let's break the cycle. But how?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mentor your kids at home on how to handle themselves and their own affairs and leave their Athletic endeavor's between them and their coaches.

When they go off to college one day, is mommy and daddy gonna call up the Lacrosse coach then too or is the young man you raised going to handle his own business?

There is a huge difference in the role I expect my 20 year old son to take in his relationship with his D1 coach and the role I expected him to take in his relationship with his travel coach when he was 14. If you don't understand this then you should not be working with kids.

What you teach your teenager now is what determines how he handles himself at 18 in college you dimwit.

The man who is coaching your young men, people. Let's break the cycle. But how?

Expose them when we find them and then throw them out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mentor your kids at home on how to handle themselves and their own affairs and leave their Athletic endeavor's between them and their coaches.

When they go off to college one day, is mommy and daddy gonna call up the Lacrosse coach then too or is the young man you raised going to handle his own business?

There is a huge difference in the role I expect my 20 year old son to take in his relationship with his D1 coach and the role I expected him to take in his relationship with his travel coach when he was 14. If you don't understand this then you should not be working with kids.

What you teach your teenager now is what determines how he handles himself at 18 in college you dimwit.

The man who is coaching your young men, people. Let's break the cycle. But how?

The poster boy snowflake and voice of bench warmers everywhere.....unite, unite!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mentor your kids at home on how to handle themselves and their own affairs and leave their Athletic endeavor's between them and their coaches.

When they go off to college one day, is mommy and daddy gonna call up the Lacrosse coach then too or is the young man you raised going to handle his own business?

There is a huge difference in the role I expect my 20 year old son to take in his relationship with his D1 coach and the role I expected him to take in his relationship with his travel coach when he was 14. If you don't understand this then you should not be working with kids.

What you teach your teenager now is what determines how he handles himself at 18 in college you dimwit.

The man who is coaching your young men, people. Let's break the cycle. But how?

The poster boy snowflake and voice of bench warmers everywhere.....unite, unite!!!

Not PP, uh, it's easier to lose a bad coach than lose $$ and students walking out the door. Parents and kids vote w/ their feet.