My DS accidentally saw a disturbing image online

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if your son started to tear up because he was worried about your reaction. I love my mom, but reacting appropriately was not her strong suit. I could totally see her crying and going on and on about loss of my innocence. Which would make me super uncomfortable to ever talk to her about anything sexual. Your kid is entering the years where he needs to feel safe and comfortable coming to you about things. And if your reactions are going to do the opposite, you really need to figure out how to change it.

Excellent observation and I think you are spot on. Rather than being scared of the image, he was scared of how his mom would react and given OP's replies that is understandable. I can see her son thinking he is now bad for having looked at or looked up the image intentionally or otherwise and now wonders if mom thinks he is bad and unforgivable for making this mistake and getting caught.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:What kind of delicate snowflake are you raising that he CRIED? I mean, holy shit.

omg glad I'm not the only one who thought this.

+1. I laughed when I read that.

So you show your 11 y/o porn? At what age did you start with them? Did you skip picture books and go straight to Hustler?

NP here. Don't be stupid! I have never shown my 11 year old porn and had he seen the picture OP describes his reaction at age 11 would be a. "That's fake! " or b. That's gross or That's stupid!." Not screaming and crying. My 6 year old might scream and cry. Actually, my 11 yo might scream and cry too because he would know he would be in massive trouble for purposely looking up porn and then lying about it.

You are not as nice a person as you think you are. A grown up (a parent!) who would mock an 11 year old kid for being scared by a pornographic picture is.......pretty bad.

I'm not mocking the 1 year old. Please work on your comprehension and stop pulling things out of your behind because people don't agree with you. What I and others have said is the screaming and crying is not a typical reaction of an 11 year old.

You are mocking this kid. Not all kids are the same. Maybe yours is exposed to more adult stuff but clearly this one is not. I think an 11 who still has some innocence is a good thing. Why do these kids have to grow up so fast and be so immune to everything in the adult world? I would hope an 11 has never been exposed to that kind of thing and would be scared and shocked and upset. Expect kids to handle adult stuff like adults is ridiculous and sad.

You are aware that within 2-3 years, your 11 year old son will probably be receiving blow jobs, right? Although if he screams and cries...maybe not.

I don't know what kind of hell hole your raising your kids in, but I can assure you that most 13/14 year old kid are not out getting/giving blow jobs. If you think that's normal that is really sad. I fell bad for your children.

It's not as rare as you would hope or like to think and you really can't predict if your kid will become sexually active early or not so I really hope you are talking with your kid and not assuming you don't need to because they won't do anything until they are 18 like you or because you've raised them in church and believe in abstinence until marriage.

If they are becoming sexually active early, that means that they are becoming sexually active well before the norm. If you think that is completely unavoidable and has nothing to do with your parenting style...that is sad.

I think it's sad that kids become sexually active that early. What parenting style do you think that is? Only a foolish parent thinks my kid would never.

You are giving your kid w-a-y too long a leash and you are failing to provide adequate supervision of their activities. There are many time when you do not know where your kid is, what they are doing or who they are with.

You are making a lot of assumptions. My kids have rules, limits and guidlines, but I'm raising my kids to make good choices for themselves even when there isn't a babysitter around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of delicate snowflake are you raising that he CRIED? I mean, holy shit.

omg glad I'm not the only one who thought this.

+1. I laughed when I read that.

So you show your 11 y/o porn? At what age did you start with them? Did you skip picture books and go straight to Hustler?

NP here. Don't be stupid! I have never shown my 11 year old porn and had he seen the picture OP describes his reaction at age 11 would be a. "That's fake! " or b. That's gross or That's stupid!." Not screaming and crying. My 6 year old might scream and cry. Actually, my 11 yo might scream and cry too because he would know he would be in massive trouble for purposely looking up porn and then lying about it.

You are not as nice a person as you think you are. A grown up (a parent!) who would mock an 11 year old kid for being scared by a pornographic picture is.......pretty bad.

I'm not mocking the 1 year old. Please work on your comprehension and stop pulling things out of your behind because people don't agree with you. What I and others have said is the screaming and crying is not a typical reaction of an 11 year old.

You are mocking this kid. Not all kids are the same. Maybe yours is exposed to more adult stuff but clearly this one is not. I think an 11 who still has some innocence is a good thing. Why do these kids have to grow up so fast and be so immune to everything in the adult world? I would hope an 11 has never been exposed to that kind of thing and would be scared and shocked and upset. Expect kids to handle adult stuff like adults is ridiculous and sad.

You are aware that within 2-3 years, your 11 year old son will probably be receiving blow jobs, right? Although if he screams and cries...maybe not.

I don't know what kind of hell hole your raising your kids in, but I can assure you that most 13/14 year old kid are not out getting/giving blow jobs. If you think that's normal that is really sad. I fell bad for your children.

It's not as rare as you would hope or like to think and you really can't predict if your kid will become sexually active early or not so I really hope you are talking with your kid and not assuming you don't need to because they won't do anything until they are 18 like you or because you've raised them in church and believe in abstinence until marriage.

If they are becoming sexually active early, that means that they are becoming sexually active well before the norm. If you think that is completely unavoidable and has nothing to do with your parenting style...that is sad.

I think it's sad that kids become sexually active that early. What parenting style do you think that is? Only a foolish parent thinks my kid would never.

You are giving your kid w-a-y too long a leash and you are failing to provide adequate supervision of their activities. There are many time when you do not know where your kid is, what they are doing or who they are with.

You think because your kids are in sports, have jobs, or do group activities or you have an afterschool nanny etc. That they won't have sex if they don't want to?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of delicate snowflake are you raising that he CRIED? I mean, holy shit.

omg glad I'm not the only one who thought this.

+1. I laughed when I read that.

So you show your 11 y/o porn? At what age did you start with them? Did you skip picture books and go straight to Hustler?

NP here. Don't be stupid! I have never shown my 11 year old porn and had he seen the picture OP describes his reaction at age 11 would be a. "That's fake! " or b. That's gross or That's stupid!." Not screaming and crying. My 6 year old might scream and cry. Actually, my 11 yo might scream and cry too because he would know he would be in massive trouble for purposely looking up porn and then lying about it.

You are not as nice a person as you think you are. A grown up (a parent!) who would mock an 11 year old kid for being scared by a pornographic picture is.......pretty bad.

I'm not mocking the 1 year old. Please work on your comprehension and stop pulling things out of your behind because people don't agree with you. What I and others have said is the screaming and crying is not a typical reaction of an 11 year old.

You are mocking this kid. Not all kids are the same. Maybe yours is exposed to more adult stuff but clearly this one is not. I think an 11 who still has some innocence is a good thing. Why do these kids have to grow up so fast and be so immune to everything in the adult world? I would hope an 11 has never been exposed to that kind of thing and would be scared and shocked and upset. Expect kids to handle adult stuff like adults is ridiculous and sad.

You are aware that within 2-3 years, your 11 year old son will probably be receiving blow jobs, right? Although if he screams and cries...maybe not.

I don't know what kind of hell hole your raising your kids in, but I can assure you that most 13/14 year old kid are not out getting/giving blow jobs. If you think that's normal that is really sad. I fell bad for your children.

Enough of this "feel bad for your children" crap.
At my CATHOLIC high school kids were absolutely giving blowjobs at that age. Somehow, I personally managed to abstain from that until college, and didn't actually have sex until I was 24. I was the "abnormal" one.
Take the rose colored glasses off, PP, and join the real world.
There is a huge difference between not wanting your kids to engage in these activities and what is actually happening.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if your son started to tear up because he was worried about your reaction. I love my mom, but reacting appropriately was not her strong suit. I could totally see her crying and going on and on about loss of my innocence. Which would make me super uncomfortable to ever talk to her about anything sexual. Your kid is entering the years where he needs to feel safe and comfortable coming to you about things. And if your reactions are going to do the opposite, you really need to figure out how to change it.

Excellent observation and I think you are spot on. Rather than being scared of the image, he was scared of how his mom would react and given OP's replies that is understandable. I can see her son thinking he is now bad for having looked at or looked up the image intentionally or otherwise and now wonders if mom thinks he is bad and unforgivable for making this mistake and getting caught.

Uh, no responsible parent is going to let their 11 year old surf for porn and, yes, there would absolutely be consequences if a kid was caught doing that. However, the Op's kid pulled up the image on his mom's computer with his mother right there cooking dinner. His brother asked if the packet of slivered almonds was a package of mints.....the kid googled MINTS TS and that link came up.

I believe Op when she says that this all happened really fast and randomly. Maybe you don't. There is no way to prove what really did or did not happen.

That was a shocking image, though. There was nothing about the link, that I recall, to suggest this kind of picture.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of delicate snowflake are you raising that he CRIED? I mean, holy shit.

omg glad I'm not the only one who thought this.

+1. I laughed when I read that.

So you show your 11 y/o porn? At what age did you start with them? Did you skip picture books and go straight to Hustler?

NP here. Don't be stupid! I have never shown my 11 year old porn and had he seen the picture OP describes his reaction at age 11 would be a. "That's fake! " or b. That's gross or That's stupid!." Not screaming and crying. My 6 year old might scream and cry. Actually, my 11 yo might scream and cry too because he would know he would be in massive trouble for purposely looking up porn and then lying about it.

You are not as nice a person as you think you are. A grown up (a parent!) who would mock an 11 year old kid for being scared by a pornographic picture is.......pretty bad.

I'm not mocking the 1 year old. Please work on your comprehension and stop pulling things out of your behind because people don't agree with you. What I and others have said is the screaming and crying is not a typical reaction of an 11 year old.

You are mocking this kid. Not all kids are the same. Maybe yours is exposed to more adult stuff but clearly this one is not. I think an 11 who still has some innocence is a good thing. Why do these kids have to grow up so fast and be so immune to everything in the adult world? I would hope an 11 has never been exposed to that kind of thing and would be scared and shocked and upset. Expect kids to handle adult stuff like adults is ridiculous and sad.

You are aware that within 2-3 years, your 11 year old son will probably be receiving blow jobs, right? Although if he screams and cries...maybe not.

I don't know what kind of hell hole your raising your kids in, but I can assure you that most 13/14 year old kid are not out getting/giving blow jobs. If you think that's normal that is really sad. I fell bad for your children.

Enough of this "feel bad for your children" crap.
At my CATHOLIC high school kids were absolutely giving blowjobs at that age. Somehow, I personally managed to abstain from that until college, and didn't actually have sex until I was 24. I was the "abnormal" one.
Take the rose colored glasses off, PP, and join the real world.
There is a huge difference between not wanting your kids to engage in these activities and what is actually happening.

Your school did a terrible job of supervising their students if all the kids were giving blow jobs like that. Seriously. That is not normal.

If this was happening at home or the homes of your friends then there was improper parental supervision. Sorry. Your friends' parents were lax and lazy.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure what the problem is. EXPLAIN it to him. My very immature 10 year old asked me about pornography recently and I explained what it was. Some people like to look at it, etc.

Honestly, if you keep it age appropriate, answer questions, and don't make a big deal of things, then the kids won't either. They won't be as embarrassed. And they know they can safely answer questions.

Talk.To.Your.Kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure what the problem is. EXPLAIN it to him. My very immature 10 year old asked me about pornography recently and I explained what it was. Some people like to look at it, etc.

Honestly, if you keep it age appropriate, answer questions, and don't make a big deal of things, then the kids won't either. They won't be as embarrassed. And they know they can safely answer questions.

Talk.To.Your.Kids.

Your kid approached YOU to ask you questions about pornography. I highly doubt that you pulled up an image of the Thai boylady to illustrate your points.

Op's kid was googling candy mints and that image was suddenly on the screen. It freaked him out. Maybe it was too much too soon for him? In fact, I will bet that it was.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure what the problem is. EXPLAIN it to him. My very immature 10 year old asked me about pornography recently and I explained what it was. Some people like to look at it, etc.

Honestly, if you keep it age appropriate, answer questions, and don't make a big deal of things, then the kids won't either. They won't be as embarrassed. And they know they can safely answer questions.

Talk.To.Your.Kids.

Your kid approached YOU to ask you questions about pornography. I highly doubt that you pulled up an image of the Thai boylady to illustrate your points.

Op's kid was googling candy mints and that image was suddenly on the screen. It freaked him out. Maybe it was too much too soon for him? In fact, I will bet that it was.

Poor you still believing the mint candy story.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure what the problem is. EXPLAIN it to him. My very immature 10 year old asked me about pornography recently and I explained what it was. Some people like to look at it, etc.

Honestly, if you keep it age appropriate, answer questions, and don't make a big deal of things, then the kids won't either. They won't be as embarrassed. And they know they can safely answer questions.

Talk.To.Your.Kids.

In case you didn't know you are a good mom and I mean that sincerely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if your son started to tear up because he was worried about your reaction. I love my mom, but reacting appropriately was not her strong suit. I could totally see her crying and going on and on about loss of my innocence. Which would make me super uncomfortable to ever talk to her about anything sexual. Your kid is entering the years where he needs to feel safe and comfortable coming to you about things. And if your reactions are going to do the opposite, you really need to figure out how to change it.

Excellent observation and I think you are spot on. Rather than being scared of the image, he was scared of how his mom would react and given OP's replies that is understandable. I can see her son thinking he is now bad for having looked at or looked up the image intentionally or otherwise and now wonders if mom thinks he is bad and unforgivable for making this mistake and getting caught.

+1
You both make excellent points.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure what the problem is. EXPLAIN it to him. My very immature 10 year old asked me about pornography recently and I explained what it was. Some people like to look at it, etc.

Honestly, if you keep it age appropriate, answer questions, and don't make a big deal of things, then the kids won't either. They won't be as embarrassed. And they know they can safely answer questions.

Talk.To.Your.Kids.

Your kid approached YOU to ask you questions about pornography. I highly doubt that you pulled up an image of the Thai boylady to illustrate your points.

Op's kid was googling candy mints and that image was suddenly on the screen. It freaked him out. Maybe it was too much too soon for him? In fact, I will bet that it was.

Different poster. It's ladyboy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of delicate snowflake are you raising that he CRIED? I mean, holy shit.

omg glad I'm not the only one who thought this.

+1. I laughed when I read that.

So you show your 11 y/o porn? At what age did you start with them? Did you skip picture books and go straight to Hustler?

NP here. Don't be stupid! I have never shown my 11 year old porn and had he seen the picture OP describes his reaction at age 11 would be a. "That's fake! " or b. That's gross or That's stupid!." Not screaming and crying. My 6 year old might scream and cry. Actually, my 11 yo might scream and cry too because he would know he would be in massive trouble for purposely looking up porn and then lying about it.

You are not as nice a person as you think you are. A grown up (a parent!) who would mock an 11 year old kid for being scared by a pornographic picture is.......pretty bad.

I'm not mocking the 1 year old. Please work on your comprehension and stop pulling things out of your behind because people don't agree with you. What I and others have said is the screaming and crying is not a typical reaction of an 11 year old.

You are mocking this kid. Not all kids are the same. Maybe yours is exposed to more adult stuff but clearly this one is not. I think an 11 who still has some innocence is a good thing. Why do these kids have to grow up so fast and be so immune to everything in the adult world? I would hope an 11 has never been exposed to that kind of thing and would be scared and shocked and upset. Expect kids to handle adult stuff like adults is ridiculous and sad.

You are aware that within 2-3 years, your 11 year old son will probably be receiving blow jobs, right? Although if he screams and cries...maybe not.

I don't know what kind of hell hole your raising your kids in, but I can assure you that most 13/14 year old kid are not out getting/giving blow jobs. If you think that's normal that is really sad. I fell bad for your children.

Enough of this "feel bad for your children" crap.
At my CATHOLIC high school kids were absolutely giving blowjobs at that age. Somehow, I personally managed to abstain from that until college, and didn't actually have sex until I was 24. I was the "abnormal" one.
Take the rose colored glasses off, PP, and join the real world.
There is a huge difference between not wanting your kids to engage in these activities and what is actually happening.

Your school did a terrible job of supervising their students if all the kids were giving blow jobs like that. Seriously. That is not normal.

If this was happening at home or the homes of your friends then there was improper parental supervision. Sorry. Your friends' parents were lax and lazy.

NP here. Do you go to the bathroom or step into the kitchen while your kids have friends over? Because that is exactly how long it took for me to give my first blow job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if your son started to tear up because he was worried about your reaction. I love my mom, but reacting appropriately was not her strong suit. I could totally see her crying and going on and on about loss of my innocence. Which would make me super uncomfortable to ever talk to her about anything sexual. Your kid is entering the years where he needs to feel safe and comfortable coming to you about things. And if your reactions are going to do the opposite, you really need to figure out how to change it.

Excellent observation and I think you are spot on. Rather than being scared of the image, he was scared of how his mom would react and given OP's replies that is understandable. I can see her son thinking he is now bad for having looked at or looked up the image intentionally or otherwise and now wonders if mom thinks he is bad and unforgivable for making this mistake and getting caught.

Uh, no responsible parent is going to let their 11 year old surf for porn and, yes, there would absolutely be consequences if a kid was caught doing that. However, the Op's kid pulled up the image on his mom's computer with his mother right there cooking dinner. His brother asked if the packet of slivered almonds was a package of mints.....the kid googled MINTS TS and that link came up.

I believe Op when she says that this all happened really fast and randomly. Maybe you don't. There is no way to prove what really did or did not happen.

That was a shocking image, though. There was nothing about the link, that I recall, to suggest this kind of picture.

No one has said to let your kid surf porn. Stop playing dumb , but since you believe the candy story maybe you are dumb.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of delicate snowflake are you raising that he CRIED? I mean, holy shit.

omg glad I'm not the only one who thought this.

+1. I laughed when I read that.

So you show your 11 y/o porn? At what age did you start with them? Did you skip picture books and go straight to Hustler?

NP here. Don't be stupid! I have never shown my 11 year old porn and had he seen the picture OP describes his reaction at age 11 would be a. "That's fake! " or b. That's gross or That's stupid!." Not screaming and crying. My 6 year old might scream and cry. Actually, my 11 yo might scream and cry too because he would know he would be in massive trouble for purposely looking up porn and then lying about it.

You are not as nice a person as you think you are. A grown up (a parent!) who would mock an 11 year old kid for being scared by a pornographic picture is.......pretty bad.

I'm not mocking the 1 year old. Please work on your comprehension and stop pulling things out of your behind because people don't agree with you. What I and others have said is the screaming and crying is not a typical reaction of an 11 year old.

You are mocking this kid. Not all kids are the same. Maybe yours is exposed to more adult stuff but clearly this one is not. I think an 11 who still has some innocence is a good thing. Why do these kids have to grow up so fast and be so immune to everything in the adult world? I would hope an 11 has never been exposed to that kind of thing and would be scared and shocked and upset. Expect kids to handle adult stuff like adults is ridiculous and sad.

You are aware that within 2-3 years, your 11 year old son will probably be receiving blow jobs, right? Although if he screams and cries...maybe not.

I don't know what kind of hell hole your raising your kids in, but I can assure you that most 13/14 year old kid are not out getting/giving blow jobs. If you think that's normal that is really sad. I fell bad for your children.

It's not as rare as you would hope or like to think and you really can't predict if your kid will become sexually active early or not so I really hope you are talking with your kid and not assuming you don't need to because they won't do anything until they are 18 like you or because you've raised them in church and believe in abstinence until marriage.

If they are becoming sexually active early, that means that they are becoming sexually active well before the norm. If you think that is completely unavoidable and has nothing to do with your parenting style...that is sad.

What do you think the norm is? 14 is on the early side but it is hardly rare or an outlier. And generally catholic school kids are the main ones giving/receiving oral because the girls want to remain "virgins".