Can you bounce back from being bad-mouthed to spouse's friends?

[Anonymous]

I should add just one thing in my husband's defense. He had apologized a lot over the past couple weeks. He has also been honest -- it's me who keeps asking him to stop. I truly believe he got in over his head and didn't know how to do anything else, and maybe kept it up for attention or as a way of getting back at me when we bickered. We've been married for 4.5 years so this has been going on for a long time, longer than I want to admit.

[Anonymous]

Welp
I have
no words.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for posting an update when you didn’t have to. I hope everything works out for you and your children.

[Anonymous]

Why would you keep therapy a secret from him? What the F!!??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why would you keep therapy a secret from him? What the F!!??

That's what the pps told her to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I should add just one thing in my husband's defense. He had apologized a lot over the past couple weeks. He has also been honest -- it's me who keeps asking him to stop. I truly believe he got in over his head and didn't know how to do anything else, and maybe kept it up for attention or as a way of getting back at me when we bickered. We've been married for 4.5 years so this has been going on for a long time, longer than I want to admit.

I'm sorry, Op. He is terrible. And he is a user. He is treating you like the house servant charged with caring for the kids, cleaning the toilets and making him dinner. In the meantime he has been going off on couples vacations without you and doing who knows what else on "boys night" out. To top it off he's been bad mouthing you to them. That's just so wrong.

I'm sorry, Op. Your husband having friends and doing things with his friends is not the problem. But the blatant disrespect and lack of simple decency on his part towards you is just unforgivable in my view.

Where you go with this knowledge is up to you. But I would suggest getting a job, getting career training, whatever you have to do so that you have the power to leave him if you need to.

[Anonymous]

Is he a good father?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I should add just one thing in my husband's defense. He had apologized a lot over the past couple weeks. He has also been honest -- it's me who keeps asking him to stop. I truly believe he got in over his head and didn't know how to do anything else, and maybe kept it up for attention or as a way of getting back at me when we bickered. We've been married for 4.5 years so this has been going on for a long time, longer than I want to admit.

I'm sorry, Op. He is terrible. And he is a user. He is treating you like the house servant charged with caring for the kids, cleaning the toilets and making him dinner. In the meantime he has been going off on couples vacations without you and doing who knows what else on "boys night" out. To top it off he's been bad mouthing you to them. That's just so wrong.

I'm sorry, Op. Your husband having friends and doing things with his friends is not the problem. But the blatant disrespect and lack of simple decency on his part towards you is just unforgivable in my view.

Where you go with this knowledge is up to you. But I would suggest getting a job, getting career training, whatever you have to do so that you have the power to leave him if you need to.

She has a graduate degree and a job. Read the updates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is he a good father?

He's ditching his family to go on vacations solo....that is pretty crappy, ain't it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I should add just one thing in my husband's defense. He had apologized a lot over the past couple weeks. He has also been honest -- it's me who keeps asking him to stop. I truly believe he got in over his head and didn't know how to do anything else, and maybe kept it up for attention or as a way of getting back at me when we bickered. We've been married for 4.5 years so this has been going on for a long time, longer than I want to admit.

I'm sorry, Op. He is terrible. And he is a user. He is treating you like the house servant charged with caring for the kids, cleaning the toilets and making him dinner. In the meantime he has been going off on couples vacations without you and doing who knows what else on "boys night" out. To top it off he's been bad mouthing you to them. That's just so wrong.

I'm sorry, Op. Your husband having friends and doing things with his friends is not the problem. But the blatant disrespect and lack of simple decency on his part towards you is just unforgivable in my view.

Where you go with this knowledge is up to you. But I would suggest getting a job, getting career training, whatever you have to do so that you have the power to leave him if you need to.

She has a graduate degree and a job. Read the updates.

Sorry. I didn't see that. I guess the question would be can she afford to leave right now. If not, she should start working towards being able to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I should add just one thing in my husband's defense. He had apologized a lot over the past couple weeks. He has also been honest -- it's me who keeps asking him to stop. I truly believe he got in over his head and didn't know how to do anything else, and maybe kept it up for attention or as a way of getting back at me when we bickered. We've been married for 4.5 years so this has been going on for a long time, longer than I want to admit.

I'm sorry, Op. He is terrible. And he is a user. He is treating you like the house servant charged with caring for the kids, cleaning the toilets and making him dinner. In the meantime he has been going off on couples vacations without you and doing who knows what else on "boys night" out. To top it off he's been bad mouthing you to them. That's just so wrong.

I'm sorry, Op. Your husband having friends and doing things with his friends is not the problem. But the blatant disrespect and lack of simple decency on his part towards you is just unforgivable in my view.

Where you go with this knowledge is up to you. But I would suggest getting a job, getting career training, whatever you have to do so that you have the power to leave him if you need to.

She has a graduate degree and a job. Read the updates.

Does this man child dude work? Was that explained somewhere?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

She has a graduate degree and a job. Read the updates.

Does this man child dude work? Was that explained somewhere?

Yes, he also has a graduate degree and a professional job.

[Anonymous]

Ahhhh. My Dh is jewish--wow do I ever have blind spot--I didn't consider the jewish prince factor. And my DH is a jewish doctor! I had a pathetic little scenario going in my head about Nigerian princes with multiple wives or Iranians married to american girls or meth heads living in Detroit housing shells smh

I'd like to thank everyone for playing internet relationship bingo today. Please leave your cards and chips in the bin near the exit

[Anonymous]

What kind of lies did he write? I wonder if deep down he resents you and there’s a kernel of truth to what he tells his friends. Not that you are a terrible person, but he perceives you as a witch.

[Anonymous]

Being part of the LA Jewish bro scene is no excuse. I grew up in that scene.

I know you say you'll never leave your marriage, but 4.5 years of him trashing you? Please consider it and stop making excuses for him.