NCS and St. Albans misconduct

[Anonymous]

TheY need to investigate and kick them out immediately. 0 tolerance for this horrible damaging behavior

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The article states that the St. Albans head will NOT be investigating. Talk about burying the lead!!! This is why it has to be in the newspaper.

People need to (a) read school letters themselves and not rely on someone else's characterization of them -- they are publicly available and linked to the Washington Post article; (b) read the Post article themselves; and (c) try to read more carefully.

The whole incident broke in the week before break. You cannot tell from the facts in the underlying letter whether either school is aware of the identities of mail students alleged to have either acted (1) inappropriately at parties (from what some posters say, the Google Doc does not name names, which would seem reasonable); or (2) by going on social media in response to the Google Doc (as any social media savvy parent is aware, it is very easy for kids to set up dummy instagram accounts or otherwise anonymously go after someone on social media). However, in the newspaper article, I read it to say that the school was still investigating and had specifically NOT ruled out potential disciplinary actions once they know more (and once they are in fact back in session).

Those who have signed a private school contract also know that, as a prior poster referenced, schools have broad discretion to take disciplinary/enrollment actions for behavior that is not on school grounds (e.g., a student who was arrested/convicted of a crime could be disenrolled).

Most likely there will be a number of actions taken that we in Internetlandia will know nothing about, because they will be actions that the schools take within their own communities. That includes potentially serious disciplinary actions. In general schools do NOT widely publicize disciplinary actions because of privacy concerns.

[Anonymous]

If someone has an illness, not contagious, that can be private. If someone is an abuser the public has a need to know.

[Anonymous]

@18:51 The NCS Head of School did write a letter, that went out to all families/faculty/staff. It apparently just was not leaked to the Post. (Which is a good reminder that just because DCUM doesn't know about something, doesn't mean it hasn't happened.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:These types of issues are not particular to any one school, but are in fact problems that exists not only at many area private schools, but also in many of the best and wealthiest public schools.

I believe that one root cause of these issues is a sense of entitlement without any of the mitigating responsibility of "noblesse oblige". Yes, that is an old-fashioned, perhaps even condescending term as it implies that any one person's status is above any other person's.

First, we should work hard to teach our children that that is not the case. You are no better than any other person by virtue of your family, or your wealth, or your connections, or your house and neighborhood, or your school, or your parents' professional titles, or your travels.

You can, however, distinguish yourself among others by virtue of your hard work at school, the personal talents you cultivate and develop, the books you read and the knowledge you acquire, the way you treat others, the kindness and manners you demonstrate, your honesty, your attention to the greater world outside your privileged group, and work on behalf of others.

In my experience we all could do better on that front, as parents here we can sometimes focus too much on money, status, power, connections, jobs and positions, and then pass theses lessons on to our own children.

+100000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It. Happened off school grounds. How can the school investigate it?

Schools can't get involved with parties off school grounds . Schools can tell parents all they want not to host after parties or high schools parties where alcohol is present but from a legal standpoint, they can't get involved. It's a slippery slope.

The schoool can't legally do anything hence why waste the time to investigate it.

I have no dog in the fight here either

This is not true. There is nothing that prevents schools from imposing rules that apply off grounds. They require you to do homework at home, don't they? They could absolutely say that if you are caught doing X, Y or Z -- wherever -- you can be disciplined. Enforcement is difficult but thats another issue.

If they could prove (and it wouldn't have to be beyond a reasonable doubt) that an STA boy sexually assaulted an NCS girl -- wherever it occurred -- you better believe they could kick the boy out. The other thing they could do is refer the matter to the police for investigation. In fact, they are mandatory reporters so if they believe a student has been sexually assaulted, they are legally required to make that call, wherever the assault occurred.

In public schools, kids can be kicked off sports teams and extracurriculars if found drinking off-campus. There is a weird culture of blaming and ignoring at some privates.

[Anonymous]

If some horrible event did occur between an NCS student and a current STA student, why hasn't the victim gone to the police to file charges?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If some horrible event did occur between an NCS student and a current STA student, why hasn't the victim gone to the police to file charges?

You clearly do not know very much about being a victim of sexual assault.

Plus, unless you have more information than is in this thread, you really don't know what happened.

[Anonymous]

I know very little other than what has been thrown out on this forum so please enlighten me...

[Anonymous]

All I know is when my child was in 7 th grade at NCS there were StAlbans boys going around the dance touching people with their erections. When we complained the NCS middle school head said that the girls who attend the dances knew what to expect. We complained to St Albans and they also refused to do anything. We, as lawyers, suggested that the school wasn't helping the boys by treating these criminal acts as though they were jokes. But they refused to do anything. I don't think these are Christian schools as most people would understand the term. It's a perverted atmosphere.

[Anonymous]

Does anyone know what particular off campus event Vance's letter to the STA community is in regards to?

It has nothing to do with some middle school dance

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does anyone know what particular off campus event Vance's letter to the STA community is in regards to?

It has nothing to do with some middle school dance

It was a HS party where kids were drinking and hooking up.

At least one girl expresses In the google doc she did not like the way the boys treat the girls. The boys found out and mocked the girls on social media.

Nobody was sexually assaulted. It was about the boys insensitive attitude towards girls.

[Anonymous]

From a legal standpoint what can a school do here?

I have a daughter and obviously when she goes out I want her to be treated with respect by her friends and friends of the opposite sex.

However if no sexual assault occurred, what can the school really do here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:From a legal standpoint what can a school do here?

I have a daughter and obviously when she goes out I want her to be treated with respect by her friends and friends of the opposite sex.

However if no sexual assault occurred, what can the school really do here.

The school can do a lot. They are after all educating these children. They talk big about morals education but there seems to be a big gap in there. The schools can show leadership here -- they can educate, they can communicate what behavior should be, they can create a culture in which this kind of behavior is not supported by the mob. What you have here is a vacuum and the vacuum is being filled by negative attitudes and behaviors. Its the boys will be boys attitude.

The fact that some schools seem to have better social cultures than others is a good indication that the culture can be manipulated for good. I have had kids at several privates, including a Cathedral school, and I can tell you that some schools truly do a batter job of creating a healthier social climate. No school is perfect in that regard, but the Cathedral schools don't even try.

If the school is going to throw up its hands and say "well, if the boys are going to degrade the girls en masse like this, there's nothing we can do," why are you giving them all this tuition money? They don;t even trust their own competence to educate these kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All I know is when my child was in 7 th grade at NCS there were StAlbans boys going around the dance touching people with their erections. When we complained the NCS middle school head said that the girls who attend the dances knew what to expect. We complained to St Albans and they also refused to do anything. We, as lawyers, suggested that the school wasn't helping the boys by treating these criminal acts as though they were jokes. But they refused to do anything. I don't think these are Christian schools as most people would understand the term. It's a perverted atmosphere.

WTF!!??!