Siblings kids not invited to wedding

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is the worst wedding. How is anyone going to a midweek, outdoor, morning destination wedding?

Your sister should be bending over backwards to have you there. If she isn’t, I would expect that she doesn’t care if you go.

She isn’t in the wedding. Isn’t this all a little obvious?

I guess so. Either:
1) the bride/groom are a little delusional about who is going to come to their midweek, childfree destination wedding breakfast

2). the OP is delusional about how close she and her sibling really are and how important it is that she attend.

3) The OP is a troll

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I’ll still be nursing the littlest so my preference is to bring the kids with ILs to watch them or pay for a trusted friend to come on the trip with us as a nanny. I’m not in the wedding. I have a small family so really only have family weddings every 10 years, so I don’t want my spouse to miss. Maybe I should be more specific and ask my sibling if we can baby wear the child under 1 since they won’t need a seat/plate and won’t be running around? The ceremony will be 30 mins and the breakfast reception will be 3 hours max since it’s non-traditional. Just not sure if I’m being unreasonable to ask.

Absolutely bring a nursing infant!!! Being in a gown in a strange place is not the time to be pumping. Unless your baby has colic or is unusually noisy, your baby should be fine.

[Anonymous]

OP here and definitely not a troll. Baby will be 11 months so not exclusively nursing. I wanted my children to experience a family wedding but I now realize that this wedding venue / experience is not conducive to that. Destination is a 1 hour flight / 4 hour drive / 3 hour train away. So DH and I will get ILs to stay with our kids at home and then make a day trip for the wedding. Since everything is non traditional, we won’t need a hotel stay for events prior or after. So will just take a day of PTO and attend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here and definitely not a troll. Baby will be 11 months so not exclusively nursing. I wanted my children to experience a family wedding but I now realize that this wedding venue / experience is not conducive to that. Destination is a 1 hour flight / 4 hour drive / 3 hour train away. So DH and I will get ILs to stay with our kids at home and then make a day trip for the wedding. Since everything is non traditional, we won’t need a hotel stay for events prior or after. So will just take a day of PTO and attend.

Knew it.

[Anonymous]

OP, is this destination wedding in a location where many family and/or friends of one of the people in the couple are already gathered, or near to? I'm still not clear on that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I’ll still be nursing the littlest so my preference is to bring the kids with ILs to watch them or pay for a trusted friend to come on the trip with us as a nanny. I’m not in the wedding. I have a small family so really only have family weddings every 10 years, so I don’t want my spouse to miss. Maybe I should be more specific and ask my sibling if we can baby wear the child under 1 since they won’t need a seat/plate and won’t be running around? The ceremony will be 30 mins and the breakfast reception will be 3 hours max since it’s non-traditional. Just not sure if I’m being unreasonable to ask.

I don’t think it is reasonable to ask if you can wear the baby. You can be apart from the baby for 3 1/2 hours.

That leave our travel time from accommodations to venue and back. That would have been too long of a window for me when nursing (3.5 hours would have been pushing it).

She isn’t in the wedding. She wants her spouse to go too. She asked if we think it’s reasonable for her to ask to wear the baby, and my answer is that it isn’t. The wedding is not about the OP but wearing a baby to a child-free wedding will certainly make it so.

I have been a many childfree weddings where someone was wearing an infant.
It really isn’t a big deal. It’s not anything I’ve ever heard of anyone being offended about either.

There is no way that bringing the baby is going to be more annoying than the brides sister pumping in the bathroom.

Yes, OP, if you have to pump at the reception, be sure to set yourself up in the lovely lounge area where ladies redo their makeup. That'll show 'em! I love this idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I’ll still be nursing the littlest so my preference is to bring the kids with ILs to watch them or pay for a trusted friend to come on the trip with us as a nanny. I’m not in the wedding. I have a small family so really only have family weddings every 10 years, so I don’t want my spouse to miss. Maybe I should be more specific and ask my sibling if we can baby wear the child under 1 since they won’t need a seat/plate and won’t be running around? The ceremony will be 30 mins and the breakfast reception will be 3 hours max since it’s non-traditional. Just not sure if I’m being unreasonable to ask.

I don’t think it is reasonable to ask if you can wear the baby. You can be apart from the baby for 3 1/2 hours.

That leave our travel time from accommodations to venue and back. That would have been too long of a window for me when nursing (3.5 hours would have been pushing it).

She isn’t in the wedding. She wants her spouse to go too. She asked if we think it’s reasonable for her to ask to wear the baby, and my answer is that it isn’t. The wedding is not about the OP but wearing a baby to a child-free wedding will certainly make it so.

I have been a many childfree weddings where someone was wearing an infant.
It really isn’t a big deal. It’s not anything I’ve ever heard of anyone being offended about either.

There is no way that bringing the baby is going to be more annoying than the brides sister pumping in the bathroom.

Yes, OP, if you have to pump at the reception, be sure to set yourself up in the lovely lounge area where ladies redo their makeup. That'll show 'em! I love this idea.

No one is going to care about OP pumping in the lounge.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Destination weddings are the worst, for all kinds of reasons not even mentioned by the OP. They are the height of selfishness and self absorption. If you want to have a wedding someplace else, just elope.

Again, bullshit. Nobody is forcing anybody to go. And some destinations are pretty cool.

You had a destination wedding huh

And nobody came!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here and definitely not a troll. Baby will be 11 months so not exclusively nursing. I wanted my children to experience a family wedding but I now realize that this wedding venue / experience is not conducive to that. Destination is a 1 hour flight / 4 hour drive / 3 hour train away. So DH and I will get ILs to stay with our kids at home and then make a day trip for the wedding. Since everything is non traditional, we won’t need a hotel stay for events prior or after. So will just take a day of PTO and attend.

Idk what your 11mo old is like, but mine wasn't the kind that would sleep or be worn through a 3-hr reception. And if there was a meal being served, I probably would want a high-chair for him ... which is not the kind of accommodation I'd expect from an explicitly "no kids" event. If you were talking about a newborn, I could understand a request to bring the baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I’ll still be nursing the littlest so my preference is to bring the kids with ILs to watch them or pay for a trusted friend to come on the trip with us as a nanny. I’m not in the wedding. I have a small family so really only have family weddings every 10 years, so I don’t want my spouse to miss. Maybe I should be more specific and ask my sibling if we can baby wear the child under 1 since they won’t need a seat/plate and won’t be running around? The ceremony will be 30 mins and the breakfast reception will be 3 hours max since it’s non-traditional. Just not sure if I’m being unreasonable to ask.

I don’t think it is reasonable to ask if you can wear the baby. You can be apart from the baby for 3 1/2 hours.

That leave our travel time from accommodations to venue and back. That would have been too long of a window for me when nursing (3.5 hours would have been pushing it).

She isn’t in the wedding. She wants her spouse to go too. She asked if we think it’s reasonable for her to ask to wear the baby, and my answer is that it isn’t. The wedding is not about the OP but wearing a baby to a child-free wedding will certainly make it so.

I have been a many childfree weddings where someone was wearing an infant.
It really isn’t a big deal. It’s not anything I’ve ever heard of anyone being offended about either.

There is no way that bringing the baby is going to be more annoying than the brides sister pumping in the bathroom.

Yes, OP, if you have to pump at the reception, be sure to set yourself up in the lovely lounge area where ladies redo their makeup. That'll show 'em! I love this idea.

No one is going to care about OP pumping in the lounge.

And no one is going to care about her nursing her baby outside while they eat breakfast.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I’ll still be nursing the littlest so my preference is to bring the kids with ILs to watch them or pay for a trusted friend to come on the trip with us as a nanny. I’m not in the wedding. I have a small family so really only have family weddings every 10 years, so I don’t want my spouse to miss. Maybe I should be more specific and ask my sibling if we can baby wear the child under 1 since they won’t need a seat/plate and won’t be running around? The ceremony will be 30 mins and the breakfast reception will be 3 hours max since it’s non-traditional. Just not sure if I’m being unreasonable to ask.

I don’t think it is reasonable to ask if you can wear the baby. You can be apart from the baby for 3 1/2 hours.

That leave our travel time from accommodations to venue and back. That would have been too long of a window for me when nursing (3.5 hours would have been pushing it).

She isn’t in the wedding. She wants her spouse to go too. She asked if we think it’s reasonable for her to ask to wear the baby, and my answer is that it isn’t. The wedding is not about the OP but wearing a baby to a child-free wedding will certainly make it so.

I have been a many childfree weddings where someone was wearing an infant.
It really isn’t a big deal. It’s not anything I’ve ever heard of anyone being offended about either.

There is no way that bringing the baby is going to be more annoying than the brides sister pumping in the bathroom.

Yes, OP, if you have to pump at the reception, be sure to set yourself up in the lovely lounge area where ladies redo their makeup. That'll show 'em! I love this idea.

No one is going to care about OP pumping in the lounge.

They are eating breakfast outdoors. There isn’t a lounge.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and definitely not a troll. Baby will be 11 months so not exclusively nursing. I wanted my children to experience a family wedding but I now realize that this wedding venue / experience is not conducive to that. Destination is a 1 hour flight / 4 hour drive / 3 hour train away. So DH and I will get ILs to stay with our kids at home and then make a day trip for the wedding. Since everything is non traditional, we won’t need a hotel stay for events prior or after. So will just take a day of PTO and attend.

Knew it.

Wow. You were right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here and definitely not a troll. Baby will be 11 months so not exclusively nursing. I wanted my children to experience a family wedding but I now realize that this wedding venue / experience is not conducive to that. Destination is a 1 hour flight / 4 hour drive / 3 hour train away. So DH and I will get ILs to stay with our kids at home and then make a day trip for the wedding. Since everything is non traditional, we won’t need a hotel stay for events prior or after. So will just take a day of PTO and attend.

Lol at describing a wedding a 4 hour drive from you (and seriously why did you even bother to specify the flight time!) as a destination wedding.

And don’t worry, your toddlers and 11 month old will have no memories of experiencing” or not experiencing said event. It’s fine if you want to make it about your own preferences or memories of having your children there, but somewhat ludicrous to pretend that this will be some meaningful experience for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and definitely not a troll. Baby will be 11 months so not exclusively nursing. I wanted my children to experience a family wedding but I now realize that this wedding venue / experience is not conducive to that. Destination is a 1 hour flight / 4 hour drive / 3 hour train away. So DH and I will get ILs to stay with our kids at home and then make a day trip for the wedding. Since everything is non traditional, we won’t need a hotel stay for events prior or after. So will just take a day of PTO and attend.

Lol at describing a wedding a 4 hour drive from you (and seriously why did you even bother to specify the flight time!) as a destination wedding.

And don’t worry, your toddlers and 11 month old will have no memories of experiencing” or not experiencing said event. It’s fine if you want to make it about your own preferences or memories of having your children there, but somewhat ludicrous to pretend that this will be some meaningful experience for them.

4 hr drive is like a 1/2 hr flight like you ascend are in the air for a few mins and then descend. I wouldn’t really call that a “destination wedding!”

[Anonymous]

OP. Your sibling is getting married 4 hours away, and your in-laws are available to watch your kids. This is honestly about as easy as it gets to go to a wedding as a mother of three young kids.