Tell me about your spouse’s limerent affair…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s no mixup. There’s nothing else going on. We correspond occasionally, nothing happening in real life.

You never revealed his wife knew that you two were expressing longing and 'connection' in your correspondence.

Face it, you are both lying to your spouses about the connection you are keeping with one another.

That definitely falls under 'emotional affair' which often goes on longer and ends up worse for the marriage--since like OP they are constantly dreaming of another life and living in escapism world that this other person is God.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s no mixup. There’s nothing else going on. We correspond occasionally, nothing happening in real life.

You never revealed his wife knew that you two were expressing longing and 'connection' in your correspondence.

Face it, you are both lying to your spouses about the connection you are keeping with one another.

What are you, the Gestapo? I “never revealed it” bc no one asked just assumed, then I clarified. You guys really cannot grasp that two adults are able to check themselves, use restraint, and not destroy their families over something that they have already agreed will never occur. Sorry you have such boring inner lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s no mixup. There’s nothing else going on. We correspond occasionally, nothing happening in real life.

You never revealed his wife knew that you two were expressing longing and 'connection' in your correspondence.

Face it, you are both lying to your spouses about the connection you are keeping with one another.

What are you, the Gestapo? I “never revealed it” bc no one asked just assumed, then I clarified. You guys really cannot grasp that two adults are able to check themselves, use restraint, and not destroy their families over something that they have already agreed will never occur. Sorry you have such boring inner lives.

Well, restraint would involve cutting off all contact. You haven't done that which is why you can't get over your teenage dream escape.

[Anonymous]

We enrich each other’s lives while sticking to limits and clear boundaries. Good lord this place is like Salem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ yeah. My husband and I met at 26/25. We are 51/50. We have been through everything together. I know all of his family members, childhood friends, college friends. We have lived abroad, bared our souls, had kids, lost a parent, been through happy and sad and new jobs and bought houses, lost friends, gained friends, watched our kids take their first breath, watched kids’ triumphs and disappointments.

It would be very hard for anyone to claim they knew us better and understood each on a deeper level, that’s limerence talking pp. You were in affair which is not real. FFS. It’s why only 2% of those things make it.

I have been through all those things too with my spouse and so has he. My husband is no slouch intellectually or emotionally and has a really noble character in many ways. But this person's attunement, depth, honestly and relatedness are categorically different and I am different with him. He is not all kindness or perfection and there are ample flaws and complexity there. But he brings out my most loving and generous qualities. Again, reasons we cannot see or speak to each other.

His honesty ?! HA! He's lying to his wife. He's running around behind her back communicating with you.

His wife knows we communicate and that it’s going nowhere.

How long have you known this person? Months? A year?

For 13 years you’ve been doing this? That’s a really long time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ yeah. My husband and I met at 26/25. We are 51/50. We have been through everything together. I know all of his family members, childhood friends, college friends. We have lived abroad, bared our souls, had kids, lost a parent, been through happy and sad and new jobs and bought houses, lost friends, gained friends, watched our kids take their first breath, watched kids’ triumphs and disappointments.

It would be very hard for anyone to claim they knew us better and understood each on a deeper level, that’s limerence talking pp. You were in affair which is not real. FFS. It’s why only 2% of those things make it.

I have been through all those things too with my spouse and so has he. My husband is no slouch intellectually or emotionally and has a really noble character in many ways. But this person's attunement, depth, honestly and relatedness are categorically different and I am different with him. He is not all kindness or perfection and there are ample flaws and complexity there. But he brings out my most loving and generous qualities. Again, reasons we cannot see or speak to each other.

His honesty ?! HA! He's lying to his wife. He's running around behind her back communicating with you.

His wife knows we communicate and that it’s going nowhere.

How long have you known this person? Months? A year?

For 13 years you’ve been doing this? That’s a really long time.

It's why her marriage is sh*t. She's been leaning out dreaming of this guy for over a decade. Pathetic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s no mixup. There’s nothing else going on. We correspond occasionally, nothing happening in real life.

You never revealed his wife knew that you two were expressing longing and 'connection' in your correspondence.

Face it, you are both lying to your spouses about the connection you are keeping with one another.

What are you, the Gestapo? I “never revealed it” bc no one asked just assumed, then I clarified. You guys really cannot grasp that two adults are able to check themselves, use restraint, and not destroy their families over something that they have already agreed will never occur. Sorry you have such boring inner lives.

Well, restraint would involve cutting off all contact. You haven't done that which is why you can't get over your teenage dream escape.

+100

[Anonymous]

^^ If this guy is so great and so into you, why doesn’t he man up and claim you? What’s holding him back? Oh, he loves his wife and not you. What he loves about you is the power he feels from having strung you along for 13 years (!!) to massage his ego while stealing a wife’s affection away from another man and their children. You two are equally pathetic and deserve each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^ If this guy is so great and so into you, why doesn’t he man up and claim you? What’s holding him back? Oh, he loves his wife and not you. What he loves about you is the power he feels from having strung you along for 13 years (!!) to massage his ego while stealing a wife’s affection away from another man and their children. You two are equally pathetic and deserve each other.

YES!!
+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^ If this guy is so great and so into you, why doesn’t he man up and claim you? What’s holding him back? Oh, he loves his wife and not you. What he loves about you is the power he feels from having strung you along for 13 years (!!) to massage his ego while stealing a wife’s affection away from another man and their children. You two are equally pathetic and deserve each other.

YES!!
+1

Or maybe he does love the other woman, but he's too selfish to leave his wife because it would be too much of an inconvenience for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^ If this guy is so great and so into you, why doesn’t he man up and claim you? What’s holding him back? Oh, he loves his wife and not you. What he loves about you is the power he feels from having strung you along for 13 years (!!) to massage his ego while stealing a wife’s affection away from another man and their children. You two are equally pathetic and deserve each other.

YES!!
+1

Or maybe he does love the other woman, but he's too selfish to leave his wife because it would be too much of an inconvenience for him.

According to that woman, they rarely talk/communicate, so it’s doubtful. I agree. It’s an ego thing. Men love that flattery and idea some woman is lining for them.

[Anonymous]

-^ pining

[Anonymous]

We enrich each other’s lives while sticking to limits and clear boundaries. Good lord this place is like Salem.

Every single post of yours makes you sound more like a middle school girl with zero true emotional maturity. I seriously hope you aren’t a parent because there is NO WAY you are mature enough to be one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know about limerance, but my spouse had a limerick affair.

There once was a spouse who was horny
It led to problems very thorny
Wedding vows they broke
Hurt multiple folk
Now multiple lives are all torn-y.

Oh man, this made me laugh. Brilliant. Sorry, OP, I know it’s not a laughing matter for you.

Ewan MacGregor sums it up nicely. Leaves wife and 4 daughters for younger wife double and now has new son at 50.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know about limerance, but my spouse had a limerick affair.

There once was a spouse who was horny
It led to problems very thorny
Wedding vows they broke
Hurt multiple folk
Now multiple lives are all torn-y.

Oh man, this made me laugh. Brilliant. Sorry, OP, I know it’s not a laughing matter for you.

Ewan MacGregor sums it up nicely. Leaves wife and 4 daughters for younger wife double and now has new son at 50.

Yep. He's slimy for sure. Although I think his new girlfriend is not as attractive as his ex wife, especially when you see pictures of her when she was younger.