Are you all cheating with ugly people?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ I’m not the PP you are responding to, but are you proud of yourself for your crass and immature response? It’s now very clear why you are seeking to date much younger women - you are obviously trying to find people of your own maturity level. I’m sure women your own age would have no interest ina conversation with you.

I don't write well enough to be proud of it. As for, crass and immature? It's an online forum. Enough said. I do like the maturity level of the women I date and I have a lot of fun with that age range although they are still middle aged, typically divorced, and have older children so I'm not sure how much more mature they need to be. As for women my age not wanting me? You have no idea. If I put my profile up on a dating site with my real age, it's scary how many women my age contact me. That's OK, there are very few women my age who can hold my interest. Sorry, I know that's a hard truth for you. You better cling to your marriage and make sure your husband is satisfied in bed because that's what it's like out there for "women my age." Is that immature and crass enough for you?

wow, this is unbelievable.

I guess women have no worth except for the sex they bring to a man in a relationship. Maybe women have worth if they are young and if they offer sex, otherwise nada. How about those daughters of yours? Do they have any value to a man besides being young and offer sex?

This is the jist of a lot of what gets posted on these forums by men....divorce a wife after kids leave home because of sex, have AP's for sex until kids leave home, date younger women because of better looks/sex.

Is there any other narrative from men? Should women just give up anything else in their lives and just focus on sex? Why go to college, just study how to make sure your partner has great sex and that's it.

Don’t feed the trolls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ I’m not the PP you are responding to, but are you proud of yourself for your crass and immature response? It’s now very clear why you are seeking to date much younger women - you are obviously trying to find people of your own maturity level. I’m sure women your own age would have no interest ina conversation with you.

I don't write well enough to be proud of it. As for, crass and immature? It's an online forum. Enough said. I do like the maturity level of the women I date and I have a lot of fun with that age range although they are still middle aged, typically divorced, and have older children so I'm not sure how much more mature they need to be. As for women my age not wanting me? You have no idea. If I put my profile up on a dating site with my real age, it's scary how many women my age contact me. That's OK, there are very few women my age who can hold my interest. Sorry, I know that's a hard truth for you. You better cling to your marriage and make sure your husband is satisfied in bed because that's what it's like out there for "women my age." Is that immature and crass enough for you?

wow, this is unbelievable.

I guess women have no worth except for the sex they bring to a man in a relationship. Maybe women have worth if they are young and if they offer sex, otherwise nada. How about those daughters of yours? Do they have any value to a man besides being young and offer sex?

This is the jist of a lot of what gets posted on these forums by men....divorce a wife after kids leave home because of sex, have AP's for sex until kids leave home, date younger women because of better looks/sex.

Is there any other narrative from men? Should women just give up anything else in their lives and just focus on sex? Why go to college, just study how to make sure your partner has great sex and that's it.

NP here: you go to college to get a good career for yourself so that if you find yourself divorced it doesn't derail your whole life.

I guess if they are newly divorced they just want to have sex with anything and women these days just want to have sex with anything so it's probably working out fine for them, of course until the female is 30 and realises she needs to prioritise getting married. I guess that's what I see, it's such a waste of time for these women, depending on what they want out of life.

[Anonymous]

My DH cheated with a woman who's older, dumber and much worse-looking. I looked down at him for that. TBH, it would have been easier to forgive him if he cheated with someone younger and more beautiful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^. The way you stated it, it’s all about sex and your statement was threatening to older women that they better keep their men happy sexually or else.

Yeah, file that one under, DUHHHH. Do you actually read this forum?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ I’m not the PP you are responding to, but are you proud of yourself for your crass and immature response? It’s now very clear why you are seeking to date much younger women - you are obviously trying to find people of your own maturity level. I’m sure women your own age would have no interest ina conversation with you.

I don't write well enough to be proud of it. As for, crass and immature? It's an online forum. Enough said. I do like the maturity level of the women I date and I have a lot of fun with that age range although they are still middle aged, typically divorced, and have older children so I'm not sure how much more mature they need to be. As for women my age not wanting me? You have no idea. If I put my profile up on a dating site with my real age, it's scary how many women my age contact me. That's OK, there are very few women my age who can hold my interest. Sorry, I know that's a hard truth for you. You better cling to your marriage and make sure your husband is satisfied in bed because that's what it's like out there for "women my age." Is that immature and crass enough for you?

wow, this is unbelievable.

I guess women have no worth except for the sex they bring to a man in a relationship. Maybe women have worth if they are young and if they offer sex, otherwise nada. How about those daughters of yours? Do they have any value to a man besides being young and offer sex?

This is the jist of a lot of what gets posted on these forums by men....divorce a wife after kids leave home because of sex, have AP's for sex until kids leave home, date younger women because of better looks/sex.

Is there any other narrative from men? Should women just give up anything else in their lives and just focus on sex? Why go to college, just study how to make sure your partner has great sex and that's it.

You sure make a lot of assumptions. I'm an older single man. Not divorced. I'm dating and have preferences that include younger women. I make no apologies for that. Sex is not my only criteria in a good relationship, but it's right up there. Definitely a deal breaker. Not everyone has the same has high sex drive, but I still do and I'm not willing to settle for a partner who doesn't share my desires. Why should I? Again, I'm single, not stuck in a sexless marriage. An older man is not what every woman wants for sure. But I've been happy with women I've dated who have their own reasons for preferring an older man. Again, I'm not dating 20 year olds (OK, to be honest there have been two, didn't work out past 2nd date with either-no surprise).

As for, "I guess women have no worth except for the sex they bring to a man in a relationship." Of course you have more worth than the sex you share with your man. I apologize if I sounded threatening but at the same time, don't be naive and underestimate the importance of sex to a partner who still enjoys it on a regular basis. It goes equally for men also. If you don't value your sex life with your partner as much as your partner values it, or as much as you used to, then you are wise to feel like your marriage is threatened. The exception is where both partners have come to a point where they have little desire for sex and are equally happy to not have it. I don't remember reading a single thread here but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen. Those folks aren't complaining.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH cheated with a woman who's older, dumber and much worse-looking. I looked down at him for that. TBH, it would have been easier to forgive him if he cheated with someone younger and more beautiful.

I can see where you might feel a bit insulted by that. He chose HER over me??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Serious question. What does a guy in his late 40s or even 50s have in common with a 20 something, besides sex? I mean, by then you have presumably married and have older kids, are established in a career, etc. Also, do other people assume you are her dad?

I'm not dating younger women, but I can see where the conversational drop off might not be so bad. My wife -- in her 40s -- seems less interested in the world as the years go by. Her focus is getting narrower, and I'm just not that interested in her job. In her mid twenties, she'd read a lot of books and watched a variety of movies. Hell, she even liked basketball a little bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH cheated with a woman who's older, dumber and much worse-looking. I looked down at him for that. TBH, it would have been easier to forgive him if he cheated with someone younger and more beautiful.

I can see where you might feel a bit insulted by that. He chose HER over me??

Yeah. She must have a much better personality.

[Anonymous]

My brother had a serious girlfriend who was fit and fairly pretty, cheated on her and married a very pretty woman, cheated on her and married the OW - also very pretty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Serious question. What does a guy in his late 40s or even 50s have in common with a 20 something, besides sex? I mean, by then you have presumably married and have older kids, are established in a career, etc. Also, do other people assume you are her dad?

I'm not dating younger women, but I can see where the conversational drop off might not be so bad. My wife -- in her 40s -- seems less interested in the world as the years go by. Her focus is getting narrower, and I'm just not that interested in her job. In her mid twenties, she'd read a lot of books and watched a variety of movies. Hell, she even liked basketball a little bit.

Your wife would probably love to be able to read books/ watch movies and just hang out but probably doesn’t have time. Sort of interesting that you have the time to be able to do these things.

I’ve gone through those tough years when work was intense, kids were young, financial responsibilities were many and I definitely wasn’t keeping up with the world. it changes when kids grow up, more financial security etc. You will get that groove back with your wife once kids are out etc. but that likely won’t be the case with a much younger woman since you’ll always be in a different phase in life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ I’m not the PP you are responding to, but are you proud of yourself for your crass and immature response? It’s now very clear why you are seeking to date much younger women - you are obviously trying to find people of your own maturity level. I’m sure women your own age would have no interest ina conversation with you.

I don't write well enough to be proud of it. As for, crass and immature? It's an online forum. Enough said. I do like the maturity level of the women I date and I have a lot of fun with that age range although they are still middle aged, typically divorced, and have older children so I'm not sure how much more mature they need to be. As for women my age not wanting me? You have no idea. If I put my profile up on a dating site with my real age, it's scary how many women my age contact me. That's OK, there are very few women my age who can hold my interest. Sorry, I know that's a hard truth for you. You better cling to your marriage and make sure your husband is satisfied in bed because that's what it's like out there for "women my age." Is that immature and crass enough for you?

wow, this is unbelievable.

I guess women have no worth except for the sex they bring to a man in a relationship. Maybe women have worth if they are young and if they offer sex, otherwise nada. How about those daughters of yours? Do they have any value to a man besides being young and offer sex?

This is the jist of a lot of what gets posted on these forums by men....divorce a wife after kids leave home because of sex, have AP's for sex until kids leave home, date younger women because of better looks/sex.

Is there any other narrative from men? Should women just give up anything else in their lives and just focus on sex? Why go to college, just study how to make sure your partner has great sex and that's it.

You sure make a lot of assumptions. I'm an older single man. Not divorced. I'm dating and have preferences that include younger women. I make no apologies for that. Sex is not my only criteria in a good relationship, but it's right up there. Definitely a deal breaker. Not everyone has the same has high sex drive, but I still do and I'm not willing to settle for a partner who doesn't share my desires. Why should I? Again, I'm single, not stuck in a sexless marriage. An older man is not what every woman wants for sure. But I've been happy with women I've dated who have their own reasons for preferring an older man. Again, I'm not dating 20 year olds (OK, to be honest there have been two, didn't work out past 2nd date with either-no surprise).

As for, "I guess women have no worth except for the sex they bring to a man in a relationship." Of course you have more worth than the sex you share with your man. I apologize if I sounded threatening but at the same time, don't be naive and underestimate the importance of sex to a partner who still enjoys it on a regular basis. It goes equally for men also. If you don't value your sex life with your partner as much as your partner values it, or as much as you used to, then you are wise to feel like your marriage is threatened. The exception is where both partners have come to a point where they have little desire for sex and are equally happy to not have it. I don't remember reading a single thread here but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen. Those folks aren't complaining.

So I appreciate the change in tone of this post. Your previous posts were quite dismissive of women.

I’m personally not threatened by what you wrote as I have no reason to be threatened. Nevertheless your message still remains the same about what’s important in a woman(at least to you). It’s disconcerting but it’s also one man’s view only. Good luck to you in your chase for what you’re looking for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH cheated with a woman who's older, dumber and much worse-looking. I looked down at him for that. TBH, it would have been easier to forgive him if he cheated with someone younger and more beautiful.

I can see where you might feel a bit insulted by that. He chose HER over me??

Yeah. She must have a much better personality.

He didn’t choose her over me since he didn’t want to leave and begged for forgiveness. It would have been easier to forgive if she’d been prettier.

[Anonymous]

I guess women have no worth except for the sex they bring to a man in a relationship. Maybe women have worth if they are young and if they offer sex, otherwise nada. How about those daughters of yours? Do they have any value to a man besides being young and offer sex?

This is the jist of a lot of what gets posted on these forums by men....divorce a wife after kids leave home because of sex, have AP's for sex until kids leave home, date younger women because of better looks/sex.

Is there any other narrative from men? Should women just give up anything else in their lives and just focus on sex? Why go to college, just study how to make sure your partner has great sex and that's it.

Man here, not the PP but let me give some insight. Of course marriage isn't just about sex, but marriage is a sexual relationship and if sex goes there is no marriage left for most men (and many women). I can see if its a health issue, and one literally can't give any sexual affection but even then the marriage turns into a caregiver role, and that isn't sustainable either.

So no it's not an either or and women don't have to give everything up and just have sex, but you can be an amazing woman and partner in every other respect but if your marital bed is dead or dying your marriage is toast. Isn't this super obvious?

[Anonymous]

^ so what I’m hearing is that sex is the most important thing for a man in marriage. So what would you tell your daughters on what is important for them to focus on in their marriage for LTR? I think that good sex is such a subjective measure, I think it can be used as an excuse to bail when kids leave home (I guess once men have gotten what they want from marriage 1 which is focused on raising kids).

I think women need to learn to prioritize themselves and make decisions with their interests in mind only (and prioritize kids well being as well once they have kids). It’s what I think men do well which leads to successful life outcome. Of course it begs the question what is a marriage in that situation if the goal isn’t to support each other through good and bad times.

BTW, not all men are the same as the ones on here but it’s easy to differentiate early on in a relationship.

This is what I have learned from the posts on this forum. Definitely a steep learning curve because this isn’t the perspective around me. Maybe I’m just lucky about who’s around me.

[Anonymous]

so what I’m hearing is that sex is the most important thing for a man in marriage.

Sex is very important in a relationship, and if that’s some sort of revelation, you’ve been under a rock. Because it’s not news.