Teen death at Whitman?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I drank and partied in HS. I was a good kid-- got good grades, had a job, etc. My parents didn't know I was partying-- they were great parents but were not on top of me every second (and I don't believe any of you who say you know where your kid is all times in HS). This could have happened to me or any of my friends. Right now, this could happen to your kids or any of their friends. If you think 'never my kid' or 'I would kill my kid for that' then you are the type of parents whose kids wont tell them when they need a ride home from such party, etc...be smart people-- maybe not all HS kids drink, but don't kid yourself that your child is somehow safe from all of this because you are such a great parent.

Exact same. I think a lot of you are pretty delusional / would be surprised to find out how easily your kid gives you lip service on this stuff

I was a HS national champion in an academic activity. I was not cool by any stretch of the imagination. I eventually went to Yale. I drank in HS. Not a lot, but some. There was definitely a time or two when something like this could have happened. Same exact situation as PPs here.

Thank you for posting that. I was a good kid too (but not a good as you) and I definitely could have done this. I did not drink every weekend in High School but a couple of times a semester. Never did any drugs. Highly ranked college and grad school and overall pretty motivated and respectful as a teen. The parents of the boy have no responsibility whatsoever. Who knows where their 17 year old senior is every second??? If parents were home where they party was and they supplied alcohol, they have blame. Otherwise, I do not see it. You cannot watch over your (and others) 17 year old 24/7.

[Anonymous]

My parents both worked, I walked home from school to an empty house, I was studious, I went to HS football games & dances, I had friends in the neighborhood....I never even once drank in HS (aside from holiday dinners where I would have wine with dinner).

I had a some friends that snuck beers, I could have broken into my parents' stash...I just never did.

Then I turned legal age and went to college and, yep, I partied.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I drank and partied in HS. I was a good kid-- got good grades, had a job, etc. My parents didn't know I was partying-- they were great parents but were not on top of me every second (and I don't believe any of you who say you know where your kid is all times in HS). This could have happened to me or any of my friends. Right now, this could happen to your kids or any of their friends. If you think 'never my kid' or 'I would kill my kid for that' then you are the type of parents whose kids wont tell them when they need a ride home from such party, etc...be smart people-- maybe not all HS kids drink, but don't kid yourself that your child is somehow safe from all of this because you are such a great parent.

Exact same. I think a lot of you are pretty delusional / would be surprised to find out how easily your kid gives you lip service on this stuff

I was a HS national champion in an academic activity. I was not cool by any stretch of the imagination. I eventually went to Yale. I drank in HS. Not a lot, but some. There was definitely a time or two when something like this could have happened. Same exact situation as PPs here.

Thank you for posting that. I was a good kid too (but not a good as you) and I definitely could have done this. I did not drink every weekend in High School but a couple of times a semester. Never did any drugs. Highly ranked college and grad school and overall pretty motivated and respectful as a teen. The parents of the boy have no responsibility whatsoever. Who knows where their 17 year old senior is every second??? If parents were home where they party was and they supplied alcohol, they have blame. Otherwise, I do not see it. You cannot watch over your (and others) 17 year old 24/7.

The parents of the boy have lost their son. Even if no one blames them for not knowing where he was, they are going to be living with regrets for the rest of their life. My heart goes out to them. The worst has already happened to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I drank and partied in HS. I was a good kid-- got good grades, had a job, etc. My parents didn't know I was partying-- they were great parents but were not on top of me every second (and I don't believe any of you who say you know where your kid is all times in HS). This could have happened to me or any of my friends. Right now, this could happen to your kids or any of their friends. If you think 'never my kid' or 'I would kill my kid for that' then you are the type of parents whose kids wont tell them when they need a ride home from such party, etc...be smart people-- maybe not all HS kids drink, but don't kid yourself that your child is somehow safe from all of this because you are such a great parent.

Exact same. I think a lot of you are pretty delusional / would be surprised to find out how easily your kid gives you lip service on this stuff

I was a HS national champion in an academic activity. I was not cool by any stretch of the imagination. I eventually went to Yale. I drank in HS. Not a lot, but some. There was definitely a time or two when something like this could have happened. Same exact situation as PPs here.

Why? Teen ignorance or what?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I drank and partied in HS. I was a good kid-- got good grades, had a job, etc. My parents didn't know I was partying-- they were great parents but were not on top of me every second (and I don't believe any of you who say you know where your kid is all times in HS). This could have happened to me or any of my friends. Right now, this could happen to your kids or any of their friends. If you think 'never my kid' or 'I would kill my kid for that' then you are the type of parents whose kids wont tell them when they need a ride home from such party, etc...be smart people-- maybe not all HS kids drink, but don't kid yourself that your child is somehow safe from all of this because you are such a great parent.

Exact same. I think a lot of you are pretty delusional / would be surprised to find out how easily your kid gives you lip service on this stuff

I was a HS national champion in an academic activity. I was not cool by any stretch of the imagination. I eventually went to Yale. I drank in HS. Not a lot, but some. There was definitely a time or two when something like this could have happened. Same exact situation as PPs here.

Why? Teen ignorance or what?

I am not PP, but had a similar HS experience, academically and in terms of drinking.

Why did we drink? Because it was fun. Because it lowered inhibitions a bit and was a way to blow off steam. Because kids sometimes don't make the best choices, even smart really good kids.

Some people seem to think that there is some black and white good kid v bad kid dichotomy, and frankly that is silly. Even "good" kids do some "bad" things. Honestly, it isn't such a terrible thing that good kids occasionally do bad things. (Obviously what happened here is a tragedy, but I don't think that means a HS kid drinking is necessarily the end of the world. Tragedies can happen from many different things.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I drank and partied in HS. I was a good kid-- got good grades, had a job, etc. My parents didn't know I was partying-- they were great parents but were not on top of me every second (and I don't believe any of you who say you know where your kid is all times in HS). This could have happened to me or any of my friends. Right now, this could happen to your kids or any of their friends. If you think 'never my kid' or 'I would kill my kid for that' then you are the type of parents whose kids wont tell them when they need a ride home from such party, etc...be smart people-- maybe not all HS kids drink, but don't kid yourself that your child is somehow safe from all of this because you are such a great parent.

Exact same. I think a lot of you are pretty delusional / would be surprised to find out how easily your kid gives you lip service on this stuff

I was a HS national champion in an academic activity. I was not cool by any stretch of the imagination. I eventually went to Yale. I drank in HS. Not a lot, but some. There was definitely a time or two when something like this could have happened. Same exact situation as PPs here.

Why? Teen ignorance or what?

Not the PP, but the thing about young drinkers is they have NO IDEA how much alcohol gets you drunk. That combined with the fact that they drink sweet things that don't taste like liquor? They can be drunk before they know it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I drank and partied in HS. I was a good kid-- got good grades, had a job, etc. My parents didn't know I was partying-- they were great parents but were not on top of me every second (and I don't believe any of you who say you know where your kid is all times in HS). This could have happened to me or any of my friends. Right now, this could happen to your kids or any of their friends. If you think 'never my kid' or 'I would kill my kid for that' then you are the type of parents whose kids wont tell them when they need a ride home from such party, etc...be smart people-- maybe not all HS kids drink, but don't kid yourself that your child is somehow safe from all of this because you are such a great parent.

Exact same. I think a lot of you are pretty delusional / would be surprised to find out how easily your kid gives you lip service on this stuff

I was a HS national champion in an academic activity. I was not cool by any stretch of the imagination. I eventually went to Yale. I drank in HS. Not a lot, but some. There was definitely a time or two when something like this could have happened. Same exact situation as PPs here.

Why? Teen ignorance or what?

Different poster, but similar story...my parents were pretty strict and very involved, I was a top student, in all the accelerated classes, and ended up at Harvard. I played sports, was on the school newspaper, and did after-school activities; I was extremely responsible and did not run with the fast or cool crowd by any stretch. But I drank. Not a ton, not every weekend, but semi-regularly. I was an extremely "good" and responsible kid, but of course I lied to my parents about certain things to hide where exactly I was and what I'd been doing. We all did. They all do.

Why? Because it was fun, because it's what my peers were doing, because teenagers are self-conscious and alcohol lowers inhibitions and makes you feel fun and social. Because it was something to do. Because I was surrounded by it. Because, again...it was fun.

I can tell you the vast majority of high schoolers these days have at least experimented with drinking. Whether they're in all the AP classes, a theatre kid, volunteer in their spare time, spend their weekends at a supervised all girls' sleepover...doesn't make a difference. They've been exposed to it, and most of them have tried it. Many of them do it every weekend. Those of you who come on here all holier than thou certain your children have never and would never drink are deluding yourselves

[Anonymous]

I don't think mine would ever throw a party, but I will not leave them home alone overnight no matter how responsible I might think they are. A parent must be very naive to do this.

[Anonymous]

This reminds of a similar story in Massachusetts. This kid was one year out of high school and home from Duke -same story though.

http://www.masslive.com/news/index.ssf/2017/06/hypothermia_killed_michael_doh.html

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I drank and partied in HS. I was a good kid-- got good grades, had a job, etc. My parents didn't know I was partying-- they were great parents but were not on top of me every second (and I don't believe any of you who say you know where your kid is all times in HS). This could have happened to me or any of my friends. Right now, this could happen to your kids or any of their friends. If you think 'never my kid' or 'I would kill my kid for that' then you are the type of parents whose kids wont tell them when they need a ride home from such party, etc...be smart people-- maybe not all HS kids drink, but don't kid yourself that your child is somehow safe from all of this because you are such a great parent.

Exact same. I think a lot of you are pretty delusional / would be surprised to find out how easily your kid gives you lip service on this stuff

I was a HS national champion in an academic activity. I was not cool by any stretch of the imagination. I eventually went to Yale. I drank in HS. Not a lot, but some. There was definitely a time or two when something like this could have happened. Same exact situation as PPs here.

Why? Teen ignorance or what?

Different poster, but similar story...my parents were pretty strict and very involved, I was a top student, in all the accelerated classes, and ended up at Harvard. I played sports, was on the school newspaper, and did after-school activities; I was extremely responsible and did not run with the fast or cool crowd by any stretch. But I drank. Not a ton, not every weekend, but semi-regularly. I was an extremely "good" and responsible kid, but of course I lied to my parents about certain things to hide where exactly I was and what I'd been doing. We all did. They all do.

Why? Because it was fun, because it's what my peers were doing, because teenagers are self-conscious and alcohol lowers inhibitions and makes you feel fun and social. Because it was something to do. Because I was surrounded by it. Because, again...it was fun.

I can tell you the vast majority of high schoolers these days have at least experimented with drinking. Whether they're in all the AP classes, a theatre kid, volunteer in their spare time, spend their weekends at a supervised all girls' sleepover...doesn't make a difference. They've been exposed to it, and most of them have tried it. Many of them do it every weekend. Those of you who come on here all holier than thou certain your children have never and would never drink are deluding yourselves

Experimented with drinking can mean having a beer or some wine. It doesn't mean that most HS kids go to parties like this one.

[Anonymous]

I think it's funny how the people who say that they drank on a fairly regular basis when they were teens also insist that MOST kids do it too.

The statistics say that most HS kids do not drink like that actually.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This reminds of a similar story in Massachusetts. This kid was one year out of high school and home from Duke -same story though.

http://www.masslive.com/news/index.ssf/2017/06/hypothermia_killed_michael_doh.html

That happened in MAY?? How cold does it get at night in May in Massachusetts??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it's funny how the people who say that they drank on a fairly regular basis when they were teens also insist that MOST kids do it too.

The statistics say that most HS kids do not drink like that actually.

People who went to high school in this area and know exactly what goes down are telling you how it is. If you choose not to believe that, your call. Doesn't change the facts, and being steadfastly naive won't benefit you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's funny how the people who say that they drank on a fairly regular basis when they were teens also insist that MOST kids do it too.

The statistics say that most HS kids do not drink like that actually.

People who went to high school in this area and know exactly what goes down are telling you how it is. If you choose not to believe that, your call. Doesn't change the facts, and being steadfastly naive won't benefit you.

I both went through 4 years of HS in this area and graduated. My kids have also attended a HS in the area. I didn't drink in HS although I had the opportunity to do so and probably did more self monitoring than the majority of my peers. I had the opportunity to drink, I just didn't do it. Once I turned legal age and went to college I did drink although I never drove drunk.

My own teens similarly don't drink in HS. I actually don't think that is uncommon at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's funny how the people who say that they drank on a fairly regular basis when they were teens also insist that MOST kids do it too.

The statistics say that most HS kids do not drink like that actually.

People who went to high school in this area and know exactly what goes down are telling you how it is. If you choose not to believe that, your call. Doesn't change the facts, and being steadfastly naive won't benefit you.

I both went through 4 years of HS in this area and graduated. My kids have also attended a HS in the area. I didn't drink in HS although I had the opportunity to do so and probably did more self monitoring than the majority of my peers. I had the opportunity to drink, I just didn't do it. Once I turned legal age and went to college I did drink although I never drove drunk.

My own teens similarly don't drink in HS. I actually don't think that is uncommon at all.

The stats show 66% drink in HS.