Gay man who adopted a child: Ask me Anything

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you plan to handle things like periods, bra shopping, first boyfriends (basically all of the things my DH is terrified of when it comes to our DD), etc..

Same way I plan to handle everything. We'll talk about it, we'll read books about it, and if needed, we'll pull in "experts." I grew up with two sisters; I'm not afraid of a little bra talk.

Ah, okay, that makes sense. But do you feel like it may be beneficial to have adult female figures that she can talk to about these and other things? Teenage girls seem to tend to be less than receptive when it comes to talking to dad about some things. or maybe that's what you meant by "experts"..

I took on being a single parent prepared to handle everything that will come up, in each stage of childhood. So if that means I need to figure out how to explain how to use a tampon, I will. To me, part of being prepared means having a few other people as backup in whatever ways are needed at different stages of childhood. I have guy friends and girl friends, and my daughter will be welcome to go ask for help from one of my girl friends (or one of her friends' moms if that's who she chooses) if she's more comfortable talking with them than me about things.

NP here. For those worried about the girl not having a female around to talk to about tampons and bras: plenty of us had moms right there in front of us and we STILL didn't have any kind of fantastic chit-chatty relationship. My mom was painfully awkward to talk to about those things. I know men who'd be much better at it than my mom. OP, if your daughter ever feels like she wishes she had a mom to talk to about these things, have one of your female friends explain to her that you can be as good as any mom at this.

[Anonymous]

What would the o.der you tell the younger you?

Do you text and drive?

Do you vacation with your daughter and no one else?

What time is your daughter's bedtime?

What is the most expensive gift you bought your daughter?

How many hours a day are you on DCUM?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What straight actor do you find hot? Young Adult Aidan Quinn was very hot

What actor/famous person do you look like? can't think of anyone.

How can you afford a nanny, private school, and thousand dollar pairs of shoes, yet Granny needed to fund the adoption? lol, just to be clear, not ALL my shoes cost a thousand dollars. Only 2 or 3 pairs. my grandmother funded it as a show of support. I think as she got older she really got off on angering the family. This was one more way to do it - support the gay guy everyone is hating.

If you marry one day would you have a prenup? not sure. probably the smart thing to do.

Public displays of affection: yay or nay? yes. love makes people happy.

Would you okay hormone suppressants for a transgender preadolescent?

I'd want to research it thoroughly and find out what the health risks are of delaying puberty indefinitely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you say you were a Southern Baptist? If so, how did you decide to come out vs becoming ultra religious and anti-gay?

It wasn't an option. That's no way to live. I knew I would come out and live my truth - it just took a while to figure out how to do that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ever been in her apt?

Do you curse?

Are you attracted to effeminate men or masculine men?

I asked the above questions...but my iPad auto corrected it to something so different, I can't recall what the question was!

Lol, I was a little confused by that one. Sometimes I curse. I'm attracted more to masculine men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another vote for All Souls UU church in DC. Very welcoming of gay and adoptive families. In fact, the senior minister and his partner are adoptive parents as well. We'd love to have your family visit for a service.

Thank you. I'll think about it.

[Anonymous]

Will Kate have a boy or girl?

Are you circumcised?

[Anonymous]

Are you worried about STDs?

Will you allow your daughter's boyfriend to sleep over while she's a teenager?

Do you smoke pot!

Do you believe the Richard Gere and the gerbil story?

What say you about Frederick's porno?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It seems that you enjoy answering all these questions. Why do you think this is? (I am this way too and not sure why, enjoying attention?)

I think you will change your mind about the crocs. So good for the beach and pools! Make your life easier to have shoes that can get wet, cleaned so easily, and they proudly put on by themselves from such am early age.

To be honest, I'm kind of amused that people have any at all - thought it would like 3 or 4 questions tops.
I'll try to find other shoes besides crocs. Maybe these aren't so horrible. http://www.zappos.com/crocs-kids-adrina-hearts-flat-toddler-little-kid-sea-foam-surf?zfcTest=fcl%3A0

[Anonymous]

How did you feel about yourself after the casual sex? just fine after the first couple of times

Have you lied in any of the responses to these posts? nope

What is the worst, true thing an ex would say about you? too intense

What kind of law do you do? commercial real estate

Ever taped yours,f having sex? lol, not yet

[Anonymous]

f you have read any of the posts on this site asking about dads showering with their kids...and how Europeans think its fine and Americans don't....what do you think? I've done it. Not since my daughter was really steady on her feet but when she was an infant sometimes.

What age is it not appropriate? I don't know. definitely before puberty.

How young is too young for you to date? I noticed there's a big shift around age 24. You admit you're not in college anymore and start behaving more maturely. I wouldn't mesh well with anyone who's not serious about their career.

Ever cheated on someone? no, although someone I had a one-night stand with tried to start drama by insinuating I did.

Ideal number of times per week to have sex? 3-5 during the week, 5+ when on vacation

Where do you meet your men? We're EVERYWHERE! Grocery store, department store, work, through friends, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:f you have read any of the posts on this site asking about dads showering with their kids...and how Europeans think its fine and Americans don't....what do you think? I've done it. Not since my daughter was really steady on her feet but when she was an infant sometimes.

What age is it not appropriate? I don't know. definitely before puberty.

How young is too young for you to date? I noticed there's a big shift around age 24. You admit you're not in college anymore and start behaving more maturely. I wouldn't mesh well with anyone who's not serious about their career.

Ever cheated on someone? no, although someone I had a one-night stand with tried to start drama by insinuating I did.

Ideal number of times per week to have sex? 3-5 during the week, 5+ when on vacation

Where do you meet your men? We're EVERYWHERE! Grocery store, department store, work, through friends, etc.

"I wouldn't mesh well with anyone who's not serious about HIS career."

[Anonymous]

Safe sex? Always?

Will you color the gray?

What kind of watch do you have?

Do you wax any part of your body?

Will you fully fund college?

Is your daughter spoiled?

Tell me a joke.

[Anonymous]

What would the o.der you tell the younger you? Get out sooner, with more confidence. Work harder to fight against what you know is wrong. Work harder to find more people who accept you for who you are.

Do you text and drive? oh god no. even before Oprah started making it A Thing, i didn't do it.

Do you vacation with your daughter and no one else? well, we don't go to Necker Island and seclude ourselves, but we've totally taken our show on the road.

What time is your daughter's bedtime? 7:30 or 8pm-ish. we're flexible. she's not a wreck the next day if she stays up late the night before and she doesn't have any morning appointments that preclude her from sleeping in if she wants/needs

What is the most expensive gift you bought your daughter? she's not even three yet. bubble paper is the most awesome thing ever in her eyes these days. but probably either the animal rocking chair or the trike.

How many hours a day are you on DCUM? ebbs and flows. could be a couple of hours over the course of a day, can go a few weeks without looking at all.

[Anonymous]

Are you worried about STDs? I was, got tested more than once, and am more careful and not worried now.

Will you allow your daughter's boyfriend to sleep over while she's a teenager? Oh. Um, I ... don't know. That would be .... I can't think about it now.

Do you smoke pot! No!

Do you believe the Richard Gere and the gerbil story? Snopes says no.

What say you about Frederick's porno? Haven't gotten there yet.