No-show at kids' bday party

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just went to a kid birthday party yesterday at a venue. The whole family was invited. I RSVPed for 4, thinking I would go with my 3 kids. At the last minute, DH got off work early and he and my oldest son went mountain biking, so I only showed up with 3 of us.
I didn’t really think to communicate to the host or apologize.

I don’t think I’m used to this super limited venue.

8 kids seems like an odd number too. It’s very possible that you invited all but 2-3 boys from the class. It’s possible that you were the rude one, OP.

So you’re teaching your child that if something comes up that they’d rather do it’s ok to no show to something you RSVP’d yes for? And then you’re fabricating some totally unsupported scenario in which OP’s kid left out just a couple boys from class.

Yep.
And I still think I’m right on all of it.

What class has about 20 kids in it such that a few boys were left out (2 out if 10)? You have quite the active imagination to concoct this theory and then declare yourself absolutely correct.

Yeah. I don’t think it takes an active imagination to only have 10-12 boys in an elementary school classroom.

I also don’t think my son was missed the at birthday party.

I still think I’m right on both counts. Particularly the second one since I was there.

They probably didn’t miss him because no one wanted him there in the first place. It’s likely your family was invited just to be polite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just went to a kid birthday party yesterday at a venue. The whole family was invited. I RSVPed for 4, thinking I would go with my 3 kids. At the last minute, DH got off work early and he and my oldest son went mountain biking, so I only showed up with 3 of us.
I didn’t really think to communicate to the host or apologize.

I don’t think I’m used to this super limited venue.

8 kids seems like an odd number too. It’s very possible that you invited all but 2-3 boys from the class. It’s possible that you were the rude one, OP.

So you’re teaching your child that if something comes up that they’d rather do it’s ok to no show to something you RSVP’d yes for? And then you’re fabricating some totally unsupported scenario in which OP’s kid left out just a couple boys from class.

Yep.
And I still think I’m right on all of it.

Wow. You’re awful. Let’s hope your kids marry someone with greater social skills and consideration for others than their parents had.

I hope that my kids marry someone who wants to hang out with their family if they get off work early, like their dad.

I would honestly be disappointed if my son married someone who would leave him home alone because the rest of the family RSVPed to a child’s birthday party and he was supposed to be at work.

Is a bike ride with dad such a rare occurrence that it’s worth no showing to a party for?

My DH spends hours with our kids every day (eating breakfast, coaching sports, etc.) and we do tons of family stuff on the weekend. So it just wouldn’t even cross our minds that a kid hanging out with dad would amount to some special occasion to cancel plans.

But this seems to be the case for your family.

I was thinking the same thing. If dad gets out early, he could go home and rest. He could have gone to the party.

I can’t imagine any situation where we would cancel plans for Dh getting off work early. If anything, he would join us.

We are so busy that Dh doesn’t get much rest time. He would gladly have rested at home for a few hours. Biking could happen after party, next day or any day???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s one person. And now you know that this person is flaky so they don’t get invited to these types of parties.

This. Some people are just flaky.

Don’t invite that person again. My kids know that I have this rule.

You can hang out with that friend another time. But not inviting that kid to another party.

After one mess up? Too harsh.

Uh oh, the flakes are getting nervous about the social consequences!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just went to a kid birthday party yesterday at a venue. The whole family was invited. I RSVPed for 4, thinking I would go with my 3 kids. At the last minute, DH got off work early and he and my oldest son went mountain biking, so I only showed up with 3 of us.
I didn’t really think to communicate to the host or apologize.

I don’t think I’m used to this super limited venue.

8 kids seems like an odd number too. It’s very possible that you invited all but 2-3 boys from the class. It’s possible that you were the rude one, OP.

So you’re teaching your child that if something comes up that they’d rather do it’s ok to no show to something you RSVP’d yes for? And then you’re fabricating some totally unsupported scenario in which OP’s kid left out just a couple boys from class.

Yep.
And I still think I’m right on all of it.

What class has about 20 kids in it such that a few boys were left out (2 out if 10)? You have quite the active imagination to concoct this theory and then declare yourself absolutely correct.

Yeah. I don’t think it takes an active imagination to only have 10-12 boys in an elementary school classroom.

I also don’t think my son was missed the at birthday party.

I still think I’m right on both counts. Particularly the second one since I was there.

They probably didn’t miss him because no one wanted him there in the first place. It’s likely your family was invited just to be polite.

PPs active imagination is working overtime. She has invented this snub situation and then patted herself on the back for being correct about it. What a weirdo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just went to a kid birthday party yesterday at a venue. The whole family was invited. I RSVPed for 4, thinking I would go with my 3 kids. At the last minute, DH got off work early and he and my oldest son went mountain biking, so I only showed up with 3 of us.
I didn’t really think to communicate to the host or apologize.

I don’t think I’m used to this super limited venue.

8 kids seems like an odd number too. It’s very possible that you invited all but 2-3 boys from the class. It’s possible that you were the rude one, OP.

So you’re teaching your child that if something comes up that they’d rather do it’s ok to no show to something you RSVP’d yes for? And then you’re fabricating some totally unsupported scenario in which OP’s kid left out just a couple boys from class.

Yep.
And I still think I’m right on all of it.

Wow. You’re awful. Let’s hope your kids marry someone with greater social skills and consideration for others than their parents had.

I hope that my kids marry someone who wants to hang out with their family if they get off work early, like their dad.

I would honestly be disappointed if my son married someone who would leave him home alone because the rest of the family RSVPed to a child’s birthday party and he was supposed to be at work.

Is a bike ride with dad such a rare occurrence that it’s worth no showing to a party for?

My DH spends hours with our kids every day (eating breakfast, coaching sports, etc.) and we do tons of family stuff on the weekend. So it just wouldn’t even cross our minds that a kid hanging out with dad would amount to some special occasion to cancel plans.

But this seems to be the case for your family.

I was thinking the same thing. If dad gets out early, he could go home and rest. He could have gone to the party.

I can’t imagine any situation where we would cancel plans for Dh getting off work early. If anything, he would join us.

We are so busy that Dh doesn’t get much rest time. He would gladly have rested at home for a few hours. Biking could happen after party, next day or any day???

Yeah. People are acting like no-show mom is going through some major health issue or big family problem or emergency. But more than likely, no-show mom just decided to flake and go on a bike ride with her kid.

[Anonymous]

Of course they should have texted before the party to let you know they couldn't come and ideally they'd say why (we're sick/injured/had car trouble, etc.) so you know they're not just flaking for no reason. Of course it's understandable they didn't text day of if something horrible and sensitive that they don't want to discuss happened (like PP with the story about a suicide attempt the morning of the party) but it is incredibly unlikely that is what happened in this case. Almost certainly they either forgot about the party, didn't feel like coming for some reason, or something better came up last minute and that's why they didn't give an explanation. They are rude and flaky. Don't invite them next time.

[Anonymous]

Rude or not, no-shows at kids’ parties are really common. Rather than not invite the one kid again, I’d rethink hosting a type of party where one no-show is a big deal. It will be someone else next time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Rude or not, no-shows at kids’ parties are really common. Rather than not invite the one kid again, I’d rethink hosting a type of party where one no-show is a big deal. It will be someone else next time.

So, instead of not inviting them, party throwers should rethink how they throw parties and maybe not do the things their child wants, to accommodate this nonsense? How about, no. Leaving the flakes out is more reasonable.

[Anonymous]

Happened with one of our kids when young. Kid had a huge meltdown that went on for a few hours and we missed the party. I texted my regrets later in the day. So sorry we missed it.

I didn't explain why we weren't there to spare our own embarrassment; simply took the social hit. Never heard back from the mom hosting the party, but never expected to. She never spoke to me again. Sometimes, that's life.

Our kid is high-functioning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just went to a kid birthday party yesterday at a venue. The whole family was invited. I RSVPed for 4, thinking I would go with my 3 kids. At the last minute, DH got off work early and he and my oldest son went mountain biking, so I only showed up with 3 of us.
I didn’t really think to communicate to the host or apologize.

I don’t think I’m used to this super limited venue.

8 kids seems like an odd number too. It’s very possible that you invited all but 2-3 boys from the class. It’s possible that you were the rude one, OP.

So you’re teaching your child that if something comes up that they’d rather do it’s ok to no show to something you RSVP’d yes for? And then you’re fabricating some totally unsupported scenario in which OP’s kid left out just a couple boys from class.

Yep.
And I still think I’m right on all of it.

Wow. You’re awful. Let’s hope your kids marry someone with greater social skills and consideration for others than their parents had.

I hope that my kids marry someone who wants to hang out with their family if they get off work early, like their dad.

I would honestly be disappointed if my son married someone who would leave him home alone because the rest of the family RSVPed to a child’s birthday party and he was supposed to be at work.

Is a bike ride with dad such a rare occurrence that it’s worth no showing to a party for?

My DH spends hours with our kids every day (eating breakfast, coaching sports, etc.) and we do tons of family stuff on the weekend. So it just wouldn’t even cross our minds that a kid hanging out with dad would amount to some special occasion to cancel plans.

But this seems to be the case for your family.

I was thinking the same thing. If dad gets out early, he could go home and rest. He could have gone to the party.

I can’t imagine any situation where we would cancel plans for Dh getting off work early. If anything, he would join us.

We are so busy that Dh doesn’t get much rest time. He would gladly have rested at home for a few hours. Biking could happen after party, next day or any day???

Pp who wrote that.
I went with two kids and no DH. My teenager was not missed at the elementary schooler’s birthday party. It was fine.

And if the issue is that I didn’t come with the exact number of people I RSVPed for (3 people instead of 4), then how would bringing an extra person (DH) have helped?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just went to a kid birthday party yesterday at a venue. The whole family was invited. I RSVPed for 4, thinking I would go with my 3 kids. At the last minute, DH got off work early and he and my oldest son went mountain biking, so I only showed up with 3 of us.
I didn’t really think to communicate to the host or apologize.

I don’t think I’m used to this super limited venue.

8 kids seems like an odd number too. It’s very possible that you invited all but 2-3 boys from the class. It’s possible that you were the rude one, OP.

So you’re teaching your child that if something comes up that they’d rather do it’s ok to no show to something you RSVP’d yes for? And then you’re fabricating some totally unsupported scenario in which OP’s kid left out just a couple boys from class.

Yep.
And I still think I’m right on all of it.

Wow. You’re awful. Let’s hope your kids marry someone with greater social skills and consideration for others than their parents had.

I hope that my kids marry someone who wants to hang out with their family if they get off work early, like their dad.

I would honestly be disappointed if my son married someone who would leave him home alone because the rest of the family RSVPed to a child’s birthday party and he was supposed to be at work.

Is a bike ride with dad such a rare occurrence that it’s worth no showing to a party for?

My DH spends hours with our kids every day (eating breakfast, coaching sports, etc.) and we do tons of family stuff on the weekend. So it just wouldn’t even cross our minds that a kid hanging out with dad would amount to some special occasion to cancel plans.

But this seems to be the case for your family.

I was thinking the same thing. If dad gets out early, he could go home and rest. He could have gone to the party.

I can’t imagine any situation where we would cancel plans for Dh getting off work early. If anything, he would join us.

We are so busy that Dh doesn’t get much rest time. He would gladly have rested at home for a few hours. Biking could happen after party, next day or any day???

Pp who wrote that.
I went with two kids and no DH. My teenager was not missed at the elementary schooler’s birthday party. It was fine.

And if the issue is that I didn’t come with the exact number of people I RSVPed for (3 people instead of 4), then how would bringing an extra person (DH) have helped?

Was it a venue party?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just went to a kid birthday party yesterday at a venue. The whole family was invited. I RSVPed for 4, thinking I would go with my 3 kids. At the last minute, DH got off work early and he and my oldest son went mountain biking, so I only showed up with 3 of us.
I didn’t really think to communicate to the host or apologize.

I don’t think I’m used to this super limited venue.

8 kids seems like an odd number too. It’s very possible that you invited all but 2-3 boys from the class. It’s possible that you were the rude one, OP.

So you’re teaching your child that if something comes up that they’d rather do it’s ok to no show to something you RSVP’d yes for? And then you’re fabricating some totally unsupported scenario in which OP’s kid left out just a couple boys from class.

Yep.
And I still think I’m right on all of it.

Wow. You’re awful. Let’s hope your kids marry someone with greater social skills and consideration for others than their parents had.

I hope that my kids marry someone who wants to hang out with their family if they get off work early, like their dad.

I would honestly be disappointed if my son married someone who would leave him home alone because the rest of the family RSVPed to a child’s birthday party and he was supposed to be at work.

Is a bike ride with dad such a rare occurrence that it’s worth no showing to a party for?

My DH spends hours with our kids every day (eating breakfast, coaching sports, etc.) and we do tons of family stuff on the weekend. So it just wouldn’t even cross our minds that a kid hanging out with dad would amount to some special occasion to cancel plans.

But this seems to be the case for your family.

I was thinking the same thing. If dad gets out early, he could go home and rest. He could have gone to the party.

I can’t imagine any situation where we would cancel plans for Dh getting off work early. If anything, he would join us.

We are so busy that Dh doesn’t get much rest time. He would gladly have rested at home for a few hours. Biking could happen after party, next day or any day???

Pp who wrote that.
I went with two kids and no DH. My teenager was not missed at the elementary schooler’s birthday party. It was fine.

And if the issue is that I didn’t come with the exact number of people I RSVPed for (3 people instead of 4), then how would bringing an extra person (DH) have helped?

Why would you even RSVP with the kid in the first place? My teen doesn't want to go to a little kid party. He'd stay at home or go on the bike ride, he wouldn't have been included anyway and wouldn't want to be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just went to a kid birthday party yesterday at a venue. The whole family was invited. I RSVPed for 4, thinking I would go with my 3 kids. At the last minute, DH got off work early and he and my oldest son went mountain biking, so I only showed up with 3 of us.
I didn’t really think to communicate to the host or apologize.

I don’t think I’m used to this super limited venue.

8 kids seems like an odd number too. It’s very possible that you invited all but 2-3 boys from the class. It’s possible that you were the rude one, OP.

So you’re teaching your child that if something comes up that they’d rather do it’s ok to no show to something you RSVP’d yes for? And then you’re fabricating some totally unsupported scenario in which OP’s kid left out just a couple boys from class.

Yep.
And I still think I’m right on all of it.

What class has about 20 kids in it such that a few boys were left out (2 out if 10)? You have quite the active imagination to concoct this theory and then declare yourself absolutely correct.

Yeah. I don’t think it takes an active imagination to only have 10-12 boys in an elementary school classroom.

I also don’t think my son was missed the at birthday party.

I still think I’m right on both counts. Particularly the second one since I was there.

They probably didn’t miss him because no one wanted him there in the first place. It’s likely your family was invited just to be polite.

I mean, yeah, kind of. My son who is friends with the birthday kid went. My daughter is friends with some of the kids older siblings, and she went. I know some of the parents, and I went.

My teenager would have known a couple of people there, but he probably would have hung out with me or his sister for most of it.

It was not necessary to make DS go to this party. People on this board are crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Rude or not, no-shows at kids’ parties are really common. Rather than not invite the one kid again, I’d rethink hosting a type of party where one no-show is a big deal. It will be someone else next time.

Not in my experience. I have 2 kids and have hosted at least 10 kid bday parties. We have never had someone who RSVPd yes just not show up w/ no explanation. Never. We've had people who couldn't come at the last minute but they have always texted or called to let us know before the party. Maybe your kids' friends' parents are just rude?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just went to a kid birthday party yesterday at a venue. The whole family was invited. I RSVPed for 4, thinking I would go with my 3 kids. At the last minute, DH got off work early and he and my oldest son went mountain biking, so I only showed up with 3 of us.
I didn’t really think to communicate to the host or apologize.

I don’t think I’m used to this super limited venue.

8 kids seems like an odd number too. It’s very possible that you invited all but 2-3 boys from the class. It’s possible that you were the rude one, OP.

So you’re teaching your child that if something comes up that they’d rather do it’s ok to no show to something you RSVP’d yes for? And then you’re fabricating some totally unsupported scenario in which OP’s kid left out just a couple boys from class.

Yep.
And I still think I’m right on all of it.

Wow. You’re awful. Let’s hope your kids marry someone with greater social skills and consideration for others than their parents had.

I hope that my kids marry someone who wants to hang out with their family if they get off work early, like their dad.

I would honestly be disappointed if my son married someone who would leave him home alone because the rest of the family RSVPed to a child’s birthday party and he was supposed to be at work.

Is a bike ride with dad such a rare occurrence that it’s worth no showing to a party for?

My DH spends hours with our kids every day (eating breakfast, coaching sports, etc.) and we do tons of family stuff on the weekend. So it just wouldn’t even cross our minds that a kid hanging out with dad would amount to some special occasion to cancel plans.

But this seems to be the case for your family.

I was thinking the same thing. If dad gets out early, he could go home and rest. He could have gone to the party.

I can’t imagine any situation where we would cancel plans for Dh getting off work early. If anything, he would join us.

We are so busy that Dh doesn’t get much rest time. He would gladly have rested at home for a few hours. Biking could happen after party, next day or any day???

Pp who wrote that.
I went with two kids and no DH. My teenager was not missed at the elementary schooler’s birthday party. It was fine.

And if the issue is that I didn’t come with the exact number of people I RSVPed for (3 people instead of 4), then how would bringing an extra person (DH) have helped?

Why would you even RSVP with the kid in the first place? My teen doesn't want to go to a little kid party. He'd stay at home or go on the bike ride, he wouldn't have been included anyway and wouldn't want to be.

Because I thought that DH would be at work, and it was better than hanging out at home alone. He liked the venue, and he would have known a few of the older siblings there.