No-show at kids' bday party

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is very important to you is not very important to everyone else. Take a step back. You chose a "not cheap" venue, this guest did not ask to be invited.

Huh?

What don't you get? OP is acting like this family did something terribly wrong. Of course OP wanted their kid to have a good party, but sometimes things come up. This party didn't hold the same importance to the guest as it does to OP. She needs to move on. These things happen.

It's incredibly poor manners to just not show up. It's not really about "importance." And most people realize that if you're booking a venue, it costs a set amount. Your kid's place could have gone to another kid. Good grief. It's basic etiquette -- and to your point, you're telegraphing to the family that their event/kids party is of little importance, which is kinda mean!!

You and the OP have no idea why the parent did not bring the kid. Her first response is to be annoyed and condemn the guest instead of thinking hmm, hope everything is ok.. and understand if there's a reason why they are sharing why they weren't there. Things happen in families that are private.

Right. But the proper etiquette is to give a heads up: So sorry, can't make it - Larlo is sick. Boom. One-second text.

[Anonymous]

Woukd you have the same annoyed reaction if the mom have you a reason? Does the excuse make a difference to you?
Whatever the reason, the kid was a no-show.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is very important to you is not very important to everyone else. Take a step back. You chose a "not cheap" venue, this guest did not ask to be invited.

Huh?

What don't you get? OP is acting like this family did something terribly wrong. Of course OP wanted their kid to have a good party, but sometimes things come up. This party didn't hold the same importance to the guest as it does to OP. She needs to move on. These things happen.

It's incredibly poor manners to just not show up. It's not really about "importance." And most people realize that if you're booking a venue, it costs a set amount. Your kid's place could have gone to another kid. Good grief. It's basic etiquette -- and to your point, you're telegraphing to the family that their event/kids party is of little importance, which is kinda mean!!

You and the OP have no idea why the parent did not bring the kid. Her first response is to be annoyed and condemn the guest instead of thinking hmm, hope everything is ok.. and understand if there's a reason why they are sharing why they weren't there. Things happen in families that are private.

I can’t believe the number of people on here excusing the guest’s behavior. Well, actually I can, and it explains why so many ppl on here don’t have friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Woukd you have the same annoyed reaction if the mom have you a reason? Does the excuse make a difference to you?
Whatever the reason, the kid was a no-show.

I feel like some of you people have never socialized in real life. Not showing up at a small, costly gathering is SUPER RUDE. A heads up in advance is a courtesy. Maybe someone could have brought a sib. Maybe a neighbor kid could've come. Maybe the facility would have deducted a price. GOOD GOD. Get some manners.

[Anonymous]

Kid doesn’t get invited again

[Anonymous]

It’s rude to no show with no notice.
I would be annoyed too… but it’s fine now, your kid likes the other kid, so try and let it go.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, this is incredibly rude. PP who is defending Ghoster is either to Ghoster or Ghosts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is very important to you is not very important to everyone else. Take a step back. You chose a "not cheap" venue, this guest did not ask to be invited.

Huh?

What don't you get? OP is acting like this family did something terribly wrong. Of course OP wanted their kid to have a good party, but sometimes things come up. This party didn't hold the same importance to the guest as it does to OP. She needs to move on. These things happen.

It's incredibly poor manners to just not show up. It's not really about "importance." And most people realize that if you're booking a venue, it costs a set amount. Your kid's place could have gone to another kid. Good grief. It's basic etiquette -- and to your point, you're telegraphing to the family that their event/kids party is of little importance, which is kinda mean!!

You and the OP have no idea why the parent did not bring the kid. Her first response is to be annoyed and condemn the guest instead of thinking hmm, hope everything is ok.. and understand if there's a reason why they are sharing why they weren't there. Things happen in families that are private.

Here come the excuses. The message she did send conveyed nothing of the sort that OP should bend over backwards and assume the Mose dire emergency happened. People are rude and their rudeness will be noted.

[Anonymous]

I agree that things happen, BUT that parent absolutely should have at least texted the morning of. You don't just not show up and then casually say, "Oops!" the next day.

[Anonymous]

We have had to miss last minute twice. Once for illness that showed up later in the day. The invite had the parents phone number. We texted and let them know. Another time it was a giant melt down about 30 minutes before hand. The phone number was not on the invite, would have had to look it up on the school directory. Meant to do it later, and never got to it. Do I wish we had been able to make it and if not been able to let them know promptly. Yeah. But I have grace for no shows. It's fine. It's also not like someone can invite another kid day of. "Larla wasn't going to invite you, but someone can't make it. Can you be here in 30 minutes. Please bring a big gift because I booked an expensive venue." Communicate promptly when you can. Show grace when people don't. Life with kids is an adventure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is very important to you is not very important to everyone else. Take a step back. You chose a "not cheap" venue, this guest did not ask to be invited.

Huh?

What don't you get? OP is acting like this family did something terribly wrong. Of course OP wanted their kid to have a good party, but sometimes things come up. This party didn't hold the same importance to the guest as it does to OP. She needs to move on. These things happen.

It's incredibly poor manners to just not show up. It's not really about "importance." And most people realize that if you're booking a venue, it costs a set amount. Your kid's place could have gone to another kid. Good grief. It's basic etiquette -- and to your point, you're telegraphing to the family that their event/kids party is of little importance, which is kinda mean!!

+1 and the birthday kids might ask and wonder too.

Things happen but it is SO easy to just send a text the morning-of. "Larlo woke up sick, so sorry to miss it," boom done.

People have such poor etiquette and worse yet turn it around on anyone with normal expectations to say the OP is a drama queen for caring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Things happen and it’s just a birthday party. Start doing them at home and be flexible on guest list and times, you’ll be a happier person for it.

Not sure if you've ever thrown a birthday party at a specific venue, but many have number limits, and they're not inexpensive. Beyond the cost, simply ghosting on a party is bad manners. I hope you do realize that?

Not sure if you've ever hosted a soiree on a yacht in the Mediterranean, but it's not inexpensive. That's what you sound like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have had to miss last minute twice. Once for illness that showed up later in the day. The invite had the parents phone number. We texted and let them know. Another time it was a giant melt down about 30 minutes before hand. The phone number was not on the invite, would have had to look it up on the school directory. Meant to do it later, and never got to it. Do I wish we had been able to make it and if not been able to let them know promptly. Yeah. But I have grace for no shows. It's fine. It's also not like someone can invite another kid day of. "Larla wasn't going to invite you, but someone can't make it. Can you be here in 30 minutes. Please bring a big gift because I booked an expensive venue." Communicate promptly when you can. Show grace when people don't. Life with kids is an adventure.

Ok. You are an unreliable flake. It will be remembered the next time for a similar type party.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Things happen and it’s just a birthday party. Start doing them at home and be flexible on guest list and times, you’ll be a happier person for it.

Not sure if you've ever thrown a birthday party at a specific venue, but many have number limits, and they're not inexpensive. Beyond the cost, simply ghosting on a party is bad manners. I hope you do realize that?

Not sure if you've ever hosted a soiree on a yacht in the Mediterranean, but it's not inexpensive. That's what you sound like.

So would you have canceled promptly if it was? Does the cost of the party really matter? Like "oh, it's expensive this time I will remember my manners." Yeesh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is very important to you is not very important to everyone else. Take a step back. You chose a "not cheap" venue, this guest did not ask to be invited.

Huh?

What don't you get? OP is acting like this family did something terribly wrong. Of course OP wanted their kid to have a good party, but sometimes things come up. This party didn't hold the same importance to the guest as it does to OP. She needs to move on. These things happen.

It's incredibly poor manners to just not show up. It's not really about "importance." And most people realize that if you're booking a venue, it costs a set amount. Your kid's place could have gone to another kid. Good grief. It's basic etiquette -- and to your point, you're telegraphing to the family that their event/kids party is of little importance, which is kinda mean!!

You and the OP have no idea why the parent did not bring the kid. Her first response is to be annoyed and condemn the guest instead of thinking hmm, hope everything is ok.. and understand if there's a reason why they are sharing why they weren't there. Things happen in families that are private.

+1000 It could have been an extremely sensitive issue that the parent did not feel comfortable explaining in more detail. Here's an anecdote. One time my sister was hosting a b-day party for one of my nieces at a not cheap venue and niece's best friend was a total no show. Niece and my sister were peeved but didn't press the issue with the girl's parents. Sister found out months later someone in the girl's family had a suicide attempt the morning of the party. Good thing my sister didn't give in to a bad impulse to send a text conveying how peeved she was! OK now I know that is extreme and unlikely most of the time, but it shows you that you just never know!