Mother surprised DD with tickets to a concert she doesn’t want to go to

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because it's an outing with her grandma, I would tell my child to go.

If it were just the tickets, I would have her sell them and do something else.

My teen wanted to go to a kpop concert. I got us tickets and dreaded it. Guess what? I danced the whole time and made a great memory with my kid.

Completely different scenario. You would go to the concert because your kid WANTS to go and it would be a nice outing with them even if you're not into concerts. (I'd do the same with my kid by the way and I loathe crowds.)

But OPs daughter doesn't want to go and, as well, big crowds might be detrimental to her well being.

Did you read the rest of the thread? The concert is in Miami and it would require flying there and an overnight stay. This isn't just going down to the Verizon Center with grandma for a few hours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can totally relate to how your daughter feels.

Does she like hanging out with Grandma and is she comfortable with her? If so, tell your daughter to think of it more like SHE is giving her grandma a gift in going on this trip with her. It's a year away so dd won't even be thinking about it like a crappy birthday gift by then.

But If it's going to cause too much stress and anxiety, tell Grandma to take a different relative.

She does love her Grandma. They go to museums together fairly often.

I don’t know exactly why she’s worked up but she’s really does not want to go. She doesn’t want to travel and she doesn’t want to attend the concert and it’s caused stressed so I went ahead and told her she doesn’t have to but we will give it some time before letting Grandma know (because I guess she could change her mind).

Another thing my DH brought up that really hurts my heart if it’s true. We also wonder if she’s taking my daughter to stick it to my brothers wife. Her daughter (12) is a huge fan who would love to go. My brother has been in her life for about 6 years but my mother disliked her mother and therefor remains distant with her only other granddaughter.

Jesus Christ. OP your mother sucks. Have your daughter gift her ticket to her cousin. If grandma doesn’t throw a fit I’ll take back what I said.

Seriously, having the cousin go in your daughter's place really does seem like the logical solution here -- that is bananas.

[Anonymous]

I agree that your mother sucks but to be honest your daughter should be more gracious.... I have attended events that I thought I would hate but it ended up really enjoying. And his others have said this is a much sought after a vend that she will likely remember for a lifetime.

[Anonymous]

Please. Daughter should go and enjoy the time with grandma. Don’t people have any manners????

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Didn't read all 10 pages, but no I would not force my kid to go to a concert they weren't interested in.

I'd keep the tickets for a while in case DD changes her mind and if she doesn't I'd sell them. Then reimburse mom and make an excuse why she can't go. Maybe mom will be more thoughtful when purchasing gifts in the future.

Not that I would do this, but technically since it's a gift, mom could return/resell the gift and keep the money, as with any other gift. That would be hiliarious.

PP here. I thought the same thing, but didn't want to say it out loud!

[Anonymous]

Don't any of you read Jeff's blog? This OP is a troll, just last week she started a thread where she said her mother died.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't any of you read Jeff's blog? This OP is a troll, just last week she started a thread where she said her mother died.

Okay, Jeff is cracking me up here - some excerpts from his breakdown:

"The original poster appears to be trolling. Last week she started a thread in which she said that her mother had died the previous week. That, of course, could explain why her daughter doesn't want to attend a concert with her, but it also makes it easy to decline the gift."

And:

"I really don't know what is going on here, but I sort of feel that the original poster is dealing with a real issue, it is just not the issue that she is describing. But, maybe she could find some solace in the lyrics of a Taylor Swift song?"

[Anonymous]

Sell the tickets and she can buy herself a car.

[Anonymous]

Yes. I know we all about boundaries these days but there still remains the qualities of tact and gratitude. Not everything has to be exactly how we want it to be in order for us to appreciate it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Tell your daughter to buck up and enjoy the concert. We make sacrifices and accommodations for family. Grandma isn’t perfect, but she won’t be around forever and let’s humor her and make some memories. If your daughter is truly distressed over this gift, then she is either too sensitive or too sheltered- either way going will be excellent for building resilience.

+1 this a great opportunity for your daughter to grow and spend time w her grandmother