How to talk to 9yo about overeating

[Anonymous]

If you all are talking about white rice, you are doing it all wrong….

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you all are talking about white rice, you are doing it all wrong….

My children will not eat brown rice. lol

I don't like brown rice either. I don't like the texture.

However, I like cauliflower rice, and my children and I like white rice mixed with cooked shredded cabbage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If overeating is a big issue, here's what I would suggest and it all centers around healthy eating habits that can be sustainable for the rest of her life.

- Figure out as many ways to incorporate fruits and vegetables and fiber into the diet. Maybe she likes veggies crunchy and raw, maybe she likes them sauteed. Maybe she likes to eat fruit before dinner, or for breakfast - maybe there are certain fruits she likes better. Aim for 5 a day. There are a lot of delicious healthy recipes for whatever kind of palate she might have

- Incorporate lean protein and complex carbs into daily diet.

- Keep junk food and candy out of the house, especially the prepackaged kind. If you want a treat, go out as a family together for ice cream. Feel free to get occasional fries or chips when you are out at a game or wherever. Also feel free to cook together occasionally to make homemade treats.

- Invite her to participate in meal planning and cooking.

- Never talk about "bad foods" or "good foods". You can say that veggies and fruits are chock full of nutrients that help her body grow and get stronger and it's important to eat them every day. You can also say that some foods have less of those wonderful nutrients, so you shouldn't fill up on them. In general, don't make food such a big focus on your daily lives. Eat to live, don't live to eat.

- If portions are a problem, just make enough food for your family and portion out your plates for dinner. If they are still hungry and want seconds, there is none left, but make sure there are plenty of fruit and veggies available if they are still hungry.

- Talk during meals, it slows the eating down. Keep it light and positive.

- Water only, no juices or sugary drinks.

- Be good role models for healthy and balanced (not restrictive) eating habits and positive body image

- Be active as a family on the weekends and after school if possible.

This is good in theory but impractical. Kids can overeat anything, but they especially like the carb stuff that nearly all households have: cereal, pretzels, granola bars, bread, pasta, rice. And high calorie foods like nuts, cheese, BP, avocados. While don’t have “junk” food, you still may need to say no, you can’t have a second bowl of plain cheerios or a second bowl of nuts, or no to a second giant handful of cashews. And cooking meals with “no leftovers”ever isn’t practical either and nearly impossibly to do.

And while the “good/bad” food thing is popular no no saying, it shouldn’t be. Maybe you don’t have to specifically use the words good and bad, but you do need to explain why you can have as much broccoli as your heart desires, but you shouldn’t do that with Snickers. Why you should only eat one serving of ice cream and cake at a birthday and not “as much as you want” Kids need to know. Especially if “as much as they want to eat” is really too much

Yep. In my house you can add more green beans or whatever vegetable is being offered. If you are still not full, there are always apples, oranges and bananas. and you can have apples, oranges and/or bananas anytime you want -- there are no restrictions on those. But you are definitely not eating as much rice as you want.

This is so toxic. There is nothing wrong with rice, and a banana is not better for you than rice is. Why should a hungry kid who’s just had sports practice eat 3 apples instead of an extra serving of rice? Also, rice is boring - anyone who’s given the opportunity to “binge” on rice is going to get bored of it pretty fast. You make it exciting by restricting it.

So you wouldn’t have any issue with your clinically overweight kid having a third serving of rice at dinner?

I have a lot of questions about this scenario. Why is my kid overweight? If they weren’t active that day, why are they eating so much rice - is it a hormonal thing? An emotional thing? And also, what is wrong with me that I’m cooking boatloads of rice for one meal than policing how much people eat? Ultimately, it doesn’t seem like the answer in this scenario is just to tell the kid no more rice.

So you would restrict by cooking less rice. Isn't that still restricting? What happens when your child decides she can just cook more rice than you would cook?

I’m going to make approximately the amount of rice I think my family wants to eat. If I have one child, overweight or not, who always eats a lot of rice, I’ll probably make extra and let them eat it. Or if one meal I make too much rice and there is a lot leftover, I’ll make less next time. Again, why would I routinely make too much rice - enough that this extra rice is supposedly making my child overweight - but then refuse it to anyone in my family? Is there someone else in my family who does “deserve” the extra rice? If so, why?

Maybe you should tell us since you are the one bringing up family members who "deserve" extra rice. What a strange interpretation!

You can keep rice in the fridge for the next day, you know. You don't have to pick who gets extras and who doesn't.

I don’t mean anyone “deserves” it - but I’m guessing if a “skinny” kid wanted the extra rice, PP’s would let them have it. But I do think it’s weird to pack away the extra rice if someone else has asked for it, unless I have a specific use for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If overeating is a big issue, here's what I would suggest and it all centers around healthy eating habits that can be sustainable for the rest of her life.

- Figure out as many ways to incorporate fruits and vegetables and fiber into the diet. Maybe she likes veggies crunchy and raw, maybe she likes them sauteed. Maybe she likes to eat fruit before dinner, or for breakfast - maybe there are certain fruits she likes better. Aim for 5 a day. There are a lot of delicious healthy recipes for whatever kind of palate she might have

- Incorporate lean protein and complex carbs into daily diet.

- Keep junk food and candy out of the house, especially the prepackaged kind. If you want a treat, go out as a family together for ice cream. Feel free to get occasional fries or chips when you are out at a game or wherever. Also feel free to cook together occasionally to make homemade treats.

- Invite her to participate in meal planning and cooking.

- Never talk about "bad foods" or "good foods". You can say that veggies and fruits are chock full of nutrients that help her body grow and get stronger and it's important to eat them every day. You can also say that some foods have less of those wonderful nutrients, so you shouldn't fill up on them. In general, don't make food such a big focus on your daily lives. Eat to live, don't live to eat.

- If portions are a problem, just make enough food for your family and portion out your plates for dinner. If they are still hungry and want seconds, there is none left, but make sure there are plenty of fruit and veggies available if they are still hungry.

- Talk during meals, it slows the eating down. Keep it light and positive.

- Water only, no juices or sugary drinks.

- Be good role models for healthy and balanced (not restrictive) eating habits and positive body image

- Be active as a family on the weekends and after school if possible.

This is good in theory but impractical. Kids can overeat anything, but they especially like the carb stuff that nearly all households have: cereal, pretzels, granola bars, bread, pasta, rice. And high calorie foods like nuts, cheese, BP, avocados. While don’t have “junk” food, you still may need to say no, you can’t have a second bowl of plain cheerios or a second bowl of nuts, or no to a second giant handful of cashews. And cooking meals with “no leftovers”ever isn’t practical either and nearly impossibly to do.

And while the “good/bad” food thing is popular no no saying, it shouldn’t be. Maybe you don’t have to specifically use the words good and bad, but you do need to explain why you can have as much broccoli as your heart desires, but you shouldn’t do that with Snickers. Why you should only eat one serving of ice cream and cake at a birthday and not “as much as you want” Kids need to know. Especially if “as much as they want to eat” is really too much

Yep. In my house you can add more green beans or whatever vegetable is being offered. If you are still not full, there are always apples, oranges and bananas. and you can have apples, oranges and/or bananas anytime you want -- there are no restrictions on those. But you are definitely not eating as much rice as you want.

This is so toxic. There is nothing wrong with rice, and a banana is not better for you than rice is. Why should a hungry kid who’s just had sports practice eat 3 apples instead of an extra serving of rice? Also, rice is boring - anyone who’s given the opportunity to “binge” on rice is going to get bored of it pretty fast. You make it exciting by restricting it.

So you wouldn’t have any issue with your clinically overweight kid having a third serving of rice at dinner?

I have a lot of questions about this scenario. Why is my kid overweight? If they weren’t active that day, why are they eating so much rice - is it a hormonal thing? An emotional thing? And also, what is wrong with me that I’m cooking boatloads of rice for one meal than policing how much people eat? Ultimately, it doesn’t seem like the answer in this scenario is just to tell the kid no more rice.

So you would restrict by cooking less rice. Isn't that still restricting? What happens when your child decides she can just cook more rice than you would cook?

And if they want to go through the trouble of making extra rice, fine, they must really be hungry!

If they are that hungry, don't you think that they would eat extra meat, vegetables, fruits, etc, rather than wait an extra 20-30 minutes for the second/third serving of rice to cook? After all, you indicated that rice isn't that special, right?

There are very good reasons someone’s body might want more grains instead of meat, vegetables, or fruit. If I had a 16 year old boy who ran 10 miles and specifically wanted more rice instead of chicken, broccoli, or strawberries, that would make a lot of sense to me. Or maybe your kid is picky and just wants to eat rice - okay fine, if you’ll make it yourself, whatever. Again, truly, no children out there are obese from cooking their own extra servings of plain rice - show me these children if you know them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m the OP of the thread on whether Ellyn Sattler works for kids who can’t regulate their food intake. My daughter is definitely overweight, and has no “off” switch when it comes to food she likes (not just junk, but anything she really likes.). Always has been like this. But she now wants to lose weight, and I’m really struggling with how to approach it for all the reasons given here. A week of trying Sattler’s approach has led to, I would guess, a doubling in my child’s consumption for the week (and I assure you she was not going hungry before). Even she said “I’m not going to lose weight eating whatever I want.” I don’t care what my daughter looks like—she takes my breath away with her beauty. But she gets made fun of for being fat, and I don’t know how to help her in a way that doesn’t lead to more issues later. So I feel for you, OP.

I don’t think Sattler works for kids who are willing to eat everything including healthy items but just eat too much. You just have to limit food for some kids so they learn not to overeat. Their is obesity in my extended family so my sister and I both were committed to trying to keep our kids at a healthy weight. My sister followed Sattler and her kids are all overweight. They just eat too much at one sitting. From a young age they are adult sized portions. I decided to limit portions for them. One slice of pizza is enough for a 5 year old. When my son wanted another slice we told him no. At dinner everyone gets one serving of food there are no seconds. If you are still hungry we tell our kids they need to wait an hour. But by then they rarely ask for food an hour later. In previous generations kids didn’t get seconds. Everyone got one serving and that was it. There wasn’t an endless supply of prepared foods.

I am always skeptical of people who claim they are following Ellyn Satter and add random letters to her name. How much of her work can you possibly have read if you think her name is Sattler or Satterly?

How old are your kids?

You're gloating about the fact that you followed techniques that are proven to backfire in adulthood. Are your kids adults?

I don’t follow Sattler because when I researched her method around 10–15 years ago I was skeptical that her method works for kids growing up in families with a family history of obesity. She does not believe in controlling portion size at any age. Not even when kids are preschoolers. If you think of how good is served in other countries or generations before, this is just not how people ate. Everyone at the table had to eat and families used to be bigger. Kids didn’t get unlimited portions.

Many, but certainly not all, kids will overeat if given access to too much food on a regular basis at sit down meals. Once a hold gets used to eating too much they can’t regulate food intake. The best predictor of if a child will be obese as an adult is if they are obese as a child. Every year a parent can delay their child from being overweight/obese it means a smaller risk of being an obese adult. My kids are now 14 and 16 and they are normal weight. As teenage boys they eat large portions at time which is understandable. I have no problem with it now. But I layer the groundwork in childhood of restricting portions because a child just shouldn’t eat the same amount as an adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m the OP of the thread on whether Ellyn Sattler works for kids who can’t regulate their food intake. My daughter is definitely overweight, and has no “off” switch when it comes to food she likes (not just junk, but anything she really likes.). Always has been like this. But she now wants to lose weight, and I’m really struggling with how to approach it for all the reasons given here. A week of trying Sattler’s approach has led to, I would guess, a doubling in my child’s consumption for the week (and I assure you she was not going hungry before). Even she said “I’m not going to lose weight eating whatever I want.” I don’t care what my daughter looks like—she takes my breath away with her beauty. But she gets made fun of for being fat, and I don’t know how to help her in a way that doesn’t lead to more issues later. So I feel for you, OP.

I don’t think Sattler works for kids who are willing to eat everything including healthy items but just eat too much. You just have to limit food for some kids so they learn not to overeat. Their is obesity in my extended family so my sister and I both were committed to trying to keep our kids at a healthy weight. My sister followed Sattler and her kids are all overweight. They just eat too much at one sitting. From a young age they are adult sized portions. I decided to limit portions for them. One slice of pizza is enough for a 5 year old. When my son wanted another slice we told him no. At dinner everyone gets one serving of food there are no seconds. If you are still hungry we tell our kids they need to wait an hour. But by then they rarely ask for food an hour later. In previous generations kids didn’t get seconds. Everyone got one serving and that was it. There wasn’t an endless supply of prepared foods.

I am always skeptical of people who claim they are following Ellyn Satter and add random letters to her name. How much of her work can you possibly have read if you think her name is Sattler or Satterly?

How old are your kids?

You're gloating about the fact that you followed techniques that are proven to backfire in adulthood. Are your kids adults?

I don’t follow Sattler because when I researched her method around 10–15 years ago I was skeptical that her method works for kids growing up in families with a family history of obesity. She does not believe in controlling portion size at any age. Not even when kids are preschoolers. If you think of how good is served in other countries or generations before, this is just not how people ate. Everyone at the table had to eat and families used to be bigger. Kids didn’t get unlimited portions.

Many, but certainly not all, kids will overeat if given access to too much food on a regular basis at sit down meals. Once a hold gets used to eating too much they can’t regulate food intake. The best predictor of if a child will be obese as an adult is if they are obese as a child. Every year a parent can delay their child from being overweight/obese it means a smaller risk of being an obese adult. My kids are now 14 and 16 and they are normal weight. As teenage boys they eat large portions at time which is understandable. I have no problem with it now. But I layer the groundwork in childhood of restricting portions because a child just shouldn’t eat the same amount as an adult.

This thinking is just so wrong. When kids are young is when they still have the ability to hear their own bodies. Little kids will stop eating when they’ve had enough and eat the nutrients they need *if* they have plenty of choice among healthy foods.

It’s when people have filled their brains with all sorts of claptrap that they no longer know their own needs. “Finish your plate.” “If you have two bites of green beans, then you can have dessert.” “My kids won’t eat grilled chicken, inly chicken nuggets.” “Well at least if they are drinking chocolate milk, they are getting milk.” “We only make cookies once a week and use less sugar than the recipe calls for.”

It’s all that BS and over-analyzing that ruins a child’s natural abilities.

You think the big difference in eating between now and the past is portions?! It’s not. It’s availability of sugary and highly processed foods.

It’s exasperating the lengths people go to to justify crappy eating habits. Which is why, yes, I hate it when you want to bring your bad habits and food to my kids’ classrooms and sports practices. Sigh.

It

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If overeating is a big issue, here's what I would suggest and it all centers around healthy eating habits that can be sustainable for the rest of her life.

- Figure out as many ways to incorporate fruits and vegetables and fiber into the diet. Maybe she likes veggies crunchy and raw, maybe she likes them sauteed. Maybe she likes to eat fruit before dinner, or for breakfast - maybe there are certain fruits she likes better. Aim for 5 a day. There are a lot of delicious healthy recipes for whatever kind of palate she might have

- Incorporate lean protein and complex carbs into daily diet.

- Keep junk food and candy out of the house, especially the prepackaged kind. If you want a treat, go out as a family together for ice cream. Feel free to get occasional fries or chips when you are out at a game or wherever. Also feel free to cook together occasionally to make homemade treats.

- Invite her to participate in meal planning and cooking.

- Never talk about "bad foods" or "good foods". You can say that veggies and fruits are chock full of nutrients that help her body grow and get stronger and it's important to eat them every day. You can also say that some foods have less of those wonderful nutrients, so you shouldn't fill up on them. In general, don't make food such a big focus on your daily lives. Eat to live, don't live to eat.

- If portions are a problem, just make enough food for your family and portion out your plates for dinner. If they are still hungry and want seconds, there is none left, but make sure there are plenty of fruit and veggies available if they are still hungry.

- Talk during meals, it slows the eating down. Keep it light and positive.

- Water only, no juices or sugary drinks.

- Be good role models for healthy and balanced (not restrictive) eating habits and positive body image

- Be active as a family on the weekends and after school if possible.

This is good in theory but impractical. Kids can overeat anything, but they especially like the carb stuff that nearly all households have: cereal, pretzels, granola bars, bread, pasta, rice. And high calorie foods like nuts, cheese, BP, avocados. While don’t have “junk” food, you still may need to say no, you can’t have a second bowl of plain cheerios or a second bowl of nuts, or no to a second giant handful of cashews. And cooking meals with “no leftovers”ever isn’t practical either and nearly impossibly to do.

And while the “good/bad” food thing is popular no no saying, it shouldn’t be. Maybe you don’t have to specifically use the words good and bad, but you do need to explain why you can have as much broccoli as your heart desires, but you shouldn’t do that with Snickers. Why you should only eat one serving of ice cream and cake at a birthday and not “as much as you want” Kids need to know. Especially if “as much as they want to eat” is really too much

Yep. In my house you can add more green beans or whatever vegetable is being offered. If you are still not full, there are always apples, oranges and bananas. and you can have apples, oranges and/or bananas anytime you want -- there are no restrictions on those. But you are definitely not eating as much rice as you want.

This is so toxic. There is nothing wrong with rice, and a banana is not better for you than rice is. Why should a hungry kid who’s just had sports practice eat 3 apples instead of an extra serving of rice? Also, rice is boring - anyone who’s given the opportunity to “binge” on rice is going to get bored of it pretty fast. You make it exciting by restricting it.

So you wouldn’t have any issue with your clinically overweight kid having a third serving of rice at dinner?

I have a lot of questions about this scenario. Why is my kid overweight? If they weren’t active that day, why are they eating so much rice - is it a hormonal thing? An emotional thing? And also, what is wrong with me that I’m cooking boatloads of rice for one meal than policing how much people eat? Ultimately, it doesn’t seem like the answer in this scenario is just to tell the kid no more rice.

So you would restrict by cooking less rice. Isn't that still restricting? What happens when your child decides she can just cook more rice than you would cook?

And if they want to go through the trouble of making extra rice, fine, they must really be hungry!

If they are that hungry, don't you think that they would eat extra meat, vegetables, fruits, etc, rather than wait an extra 20-30 minutes for the second/third serving of rice to cook? After all, you indicated that rice isn't that special, right?

That is sort of the point. Many kids will want more rice, pasta, bread, but when told no, but they can have more vegetables or meat will say no. Plenty of times, kids (like adults) just want the tasty carbs but aren’t actually still hungry. This is why it is ok to restrict. Plus even if you don’t have a morsel of white flour or sugar in your house, there are the plentiful birthday parties, playdates, restaurants, trip food. Do you let your kid have 4 pieces of pizza and 2 pieces of cake at a birthday just because they want to? Some kids are totally good at self regulating and some aren’t. If they aren’t, it is your job as a parent to help them find that balance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m the OP of the thread on whether Ellyn Sattler works for kids who can’t regulate their food intake. My daughter is definitely overweight, and has no “off” switch when it comes to food she likes (not just junk, but anything she really likes.). Always has been like this. But she now wants to lose weight, and I’m really struggling with how to approach it for all the reasons given here. A week of trying Sattler’s approach has led to, I would guess, a doubling in my child’s consumption for the week (and I assure you she was not going hungry before). Even she said “I’m not going to lose weight eating whatever I want.” I don’t care what my daughter looks like—she takes my breath away with her beauty. But she gets made fun of for being fat, and I don’t know how to help her in a way that doesn’t lead to more issues later. So I feel for you, OP.

I don’t think Sattler works for kids who are willing to eat everything including healthy items but just eat too much. You just have to limit food for some kids so they learn not to overeat. Their is obesity in my extended family so my sister and I both were committed to trying to keep our kids at a healthy weight. My sister followed Sattler and her kids are all overweight. They just eat too much at one sitting. From a young age they are adult sized portions. I decided to limit portions for them. One slice of pizza is enough for a 5 year old. When my son wanted another slice we told him no. At dinner everyone gets one serving of food there are no seconds. If you are still hungry we tell our kids they need to wait an hour. But by then they rarely ask for food an hour later. In previous generations kids didn’t get seconds. Everyone got one serving and that was it. There wasn’t an endless supply of prepared foods.

I am always skeptical of people who claim they are following Ellyn Satter and add random letters to her name. How much of her work can you possibly have read if you think her name is Sattler or Satterly?

How old are your kids?

You're gloating about the fact that you followed techniques that are proven to backfire in adulthood. Are your kids adults?

I don’t follow Sattler because when I researched her method around 10–15 years ago I was skeptical that her method works for kids growing up in families with a family history of obesity. She does not believe in controlling portion size at any age. Not even when kids are preschoolers. If you think of how good is served in other countries or generations before, this is just not how people ate. Everyone at the table had to eat and families used to be bigger. Kids didn’t get unlimited portions.

Many, but certainly not all, kids will overeat if given access to too much food on a regular basis at sit down meals. Once a hold gets used to eating too much they can’t regulate food intake. The best predictor of if a child will be obese as an adult is if they are obese as a child. Every year a parent can delay their child from being overweight/obese it means a smaller risk of being an obese adult. My kids are now 14 and 16 and they are normal weight. As teenage boys they eat large portions at time which is understandable. I have no problem with it now. But I layer the groundwork in childhood of restricting portions because a child just shouldn’t eat the same amount as an adult.

I don’t think “many” kids do overeat, especially not preschoolers. Every birthday party I go to, there are half eaten pizza slices, cupcakes with one bite taken out - most preschoolers stop eating when their full. More often than not, the kids that can’t stop eating are the ones who have been told “you can’t have cake - it’s junk food!” and then they go to a party and stuff themselves with cake.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m the OP of the thread on whether Ellyn Sattler works for kids who can’t regulate their food intake. My daughter is definitely overweight, and has no “off” switch when it comes to food she likes (not just junk, but anything she really likes.). Always has been like this. But she now wants to lose weight, and I’m really struggling with how to approach it for all the reasons given here. A week of trying Sattler’s approach has led to, I would guess, a doubling in my child’s consumption for the week (and I assure you she was not going hungry before). Even she said “I’m not going to lose weight eating whatever I want.” I don’t care what my daughter looks like—she takes my breath away with her beauty. But she gets made fun of for being fat, and I don’t know how to help her in a way that doesn’t lead to more issues later. So I feel for you, OP.

I don’t think Sattler works for kids who are willing to eat everything including healthy items but just eat too much. You just have to limit food for some kids so they learn not to overeat. Their is obesity in my extended family so my sister and I both were committed to trying to keep our kids at a healthy weight. My sister followed Sattler and her kids are all overweight. They just eat too much at one sitting. From a young age they are adult sized portions. I decided to limit portions for them. One slice of pizza is enough for a 5 year old. When my son wanted another slice we told him no. At dinner everyone gets one serving of food there are no seconds. If you are still hungry we tell our kids they need to wait an hour. But by then they rarely ask for food an hour later. In previous generations kids didn’t get seconds. Everyone got one serving and that was it. There wasn’t an endless supply of prepared foods.

I am always skeptical of people who claim they are following Ellyn Satter and add random letters to her name. How much of her work can you possibly have read if you think her name is Sattler or Satterly?

How old are your kids?

You're gloating about the fact that you followed techniques that are proven to backfire in adulthood. Are your kids adults?

I don’t follow Sattler because when I researched her method around 10–15 years ago I was skeptical that her method works for kids growing up in families with a family history of obesity. She does not believe in controlling portion size at any age. Not even when kids are preschoolers. If you think of how good is served in other countries or generations before, this is just not how people ate. Everyone at the table had to eat and families used to be bigger. Kids didn’t get unlimited portions.

Many, but certainly not all, kids will overeat if given access to too much food on a regular basis at sit down meals. Once a hold gets used to eating too much they can’t regulate food intake. The best predictor of if a child will be obese as an adult is if they are obese as a child. Every year a parent can delay their child from being overweight/obese it means a smaller risk of being an obese adult. My kids are now 14 and 16 and they are normal weight. As teenage boys they eat large portions at time which is understandable. I have no problem with it now. But I layer the groundwork in childhood of restricting portions because a child just shouldn’t eat the same amount as an adult.

I don’t think “many” kids do overeat, especially not preschoolers. Every birthday party I go to, there are half eaten pizza slices, cupcakes with one bite taken out - most preschoolers stop eating when their full. More often than not, the kids that can’t stop eating are the ones who have been told “you can’t have cake - it’s junk food!” and then they go to a party and stuff themselves with cake.

Preschools, no…

But older kids yes, I don’t know how many “many” is. But it isn’t uncommon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If overeating is a big issue, here's what I would suggest and it all centers around healthy eating habits that can be sustainable for the rest of her life.

- Figure out as many ways to incorporate fruits and vegetables and fiber into the diet. Maybe she likes veggies crunchy and raw, maybe she likes them sauteed. Maybe she likes to eat fruit before dinner, or for breakfast - maybe there are certain fruits she likes better. Aim for 5 a day. There are a lot of delicious healthy recipes for whatever kind of palate she might have

- Incorporate lean protein and complex carbs into daily diet.

- Keep junk food and candy out of the house, especially the prepackaged kind. If you want a treat, go out as a family together for ice cream. Feel free to get occasional fries or chips when you are out at a game or wherever. Also feel free to cook together occasionally to make homemade treats.

- Invite her to participate in meal planning and cooking.

- Never talk about "bad foods" or "good foods". You can say that veggies and fruits are chock full of nutrients that help her body grow and get stronger and it's important to eat them every day. You can also say that some foods have less of those wonderful nutrients, so you shouldn't fill up on them. In general, don't make food such a big focus on your daily lives. Eat to live, don't live to eat.

- If portions are a problem, just make enough food for your family and portion out your plates for dinner. If they are still hungry and want seconds, there is none left, but make sure there are plenty of fruit and veggies available if they are still hungry.

- Talk during meals, it slows the eating down. Keep it light and positive.

- Water only, no juices or sugary drinks.

- Be good role models for healthy and balanced (not restrictive) eating habits and positive body image

- Be active as a family on the weekends and after school if possible.

Thanks, this is all good advice

+1 Rather than good and bad foods, we talk about balance - if our kids go to a birthday party and have pizza and cake, the next day we have a healthy lunch and dinner to balance it out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is she hitting puberty? Kids tend to eat more around that time. Id take her to the doctor and rule out hormonal imbalances and get some suggestions from a professional. Personally I’m more on the side of don’t focus too much on her weight, but always rule out medical causes first.

She could be, but she has definitely been getting chubby noticeably since she 6/7.

My 7 year old put on 20 pounds in pandemic. (2 years.) so, it will come off in the next year.. or she will maintain that weight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you all are talking about white rice, you are doing it all wrong….

Ok rice shamer

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If overeating is a big issue, here's what I would suggest and it all centers around healthy eating habits that can be sustainable for the rest of her life.

- Figure out as many ways to incorporate fruits and vegetables and fiber into the diet. Maybe she likes veggies crunchy and raw, maybe she likes them sauteed. Maybe she likes to eat fruit before dinner, or for breakfast - maybe there are certain fruits she likes better. Aim for 5 a day. There are a lot of delicious healthy recipes for whatever kind of palate she might have

- Incorporate lean protein and complex carbs into daily diet.

- Keep junk food and candy out of the house, especially the prepackaged kind. If you want a treat, go out as a family together for ice cream. Feel free to get occasional fries or chips when you are out at a game or wherever. Also feel free to cook together occasionally to make homemade treats.

- Invite her to participate in meal planning and cooking.

- Never talk about "bad foods" or "good foods". You can say that veggies and fruits are chock full of nutrients that help her body grow and get stronger and it's important to eat them every day. You can also say that some foods have less of those wonderful nutrients, so you shouldn't fill up on them. In general, don't make food such a big focus on your daily lives. Eat to live, don't live to eat.

- If portions are a problem, just make enough food for your family and portion out your plates for dinner. If they are still hungry and want seconds, there is none left, but make sure there are plenty of fruit and veggies available if they are still hungry.

- Talk during meals, it slows the eating down. Keep it light and positive.

- Water only, no juices or sugary drinks.

- Be good role models for healthy and balanced (not restrictive) eating habits and positive body image

- Be active as a family on the weekends and after school if possible.

This is good in theory but impractical. Kids can overeat anything, but they especially like the carb stuff that nearly all households have: cereal, pretzels, granola bars, bread, pasta, rice. And high calorie foods like nuts, cheese, BP, avocados. While don’t have “junk” food, you still may need to say no, you can’t have a second bowl of plain cheerios or a second bowl of nuts, or no to a second giant handful of cashews. And cooking meals with “no leftovers”ever isn’t practical either and nearly impossibly to do.

And while the “good/bad” food thing is popular no no saying, it shouldn’t be. Maybe you don’t have to specifically use the words good and bad, but you do need to explain why you can have as much broccoli as your heart desires, but you shouldn’t do that with Snickers. Why you should only eat one serving of ice cream and cake at a birthday and not “as much as you want” Kids need to know. Especially if “as much as they want to eat” is really too much

Yep. In my house you can add more green beans or whatever vegetable is being offered. If you are still not full, there are always apples, oranges and bananas. and you can have apples, oranges and/or bananas anytime you want -- there are no restrictions on those. But you are definitely not eating as much rice as you want.

This is so toxic. There is nothing wrong with rice, and a banana is not better for you than rice is. Why should a hungry kid who’s just had sports practice eat 3 apples instead of an extra serving of rice? Also, rice is boring - anyone who’s given the opportunity to “binge” on rice is going to get bored of it pretty fast. You make it exciting by restricting it.

So you wouldn’t have any issue with your clinically overweight kid having a third serving of rice at dinner?

I have a lot of questions about this scenario. Why is my kid overweight? If they weren’t active that day, why are they eating so much rice - is it a hormonal thing? An emotional thing? And also, what is wrong with me that I’m cooking boatloads of rice for one meal than policing how much people eat? Ultimately, it doesn’t seem like the answer in this scenario is just to tell the kid no more rice.

So you would restrict by cooking less rice. Isn't that still restricting? What happens when your child decides she can just cook more rice than you would cook?

And if they want to go through the trouble of making extra rice, fine, they must really be hungry!

If they are that hungry, don't you think that they would eat extra meat, vegetables, fruits, etc, rather than wait an extra 20-30 minutes for the second/third serving of rice to cook? After all, you indicated that rice isn't that special, right?

That is sort of the point. Many kids will want more rice, pasta, bread, but when told no, but they can have more vegetables or meat will say no. Plenty of times, kids (like adults) just want the tasty carbs but aren’t actually still hungry. This is why it is ok to restrict. Plus even if you don’t have a morsel of white flour or sugar in your house, there are the plentiful birthday parties, playdates, restaurants, trip food. Do you let your kid have 4 pieces of pizza and 2 pieces of cake at a birthday just because they want to? Some kids are totally good at self regulating and some aren’t. If they aren’t, it is your job as a parent to help them find that balance.

I am the pp you are responding to.
It's the exact point I was making

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If overeating is a big issue, here's what I would suggest and it all centers around healthy eating habits that can be sustainable for the rest of her life.

- Figure out as many ways to incorporate fruits and vegetables and fiber into the diet. Maybe she likes veggies crunchy and raw, maybe she likes them sauteed. Maybe she likes to eat fruit before dinner, or for breakfast - maybe there are certain fruits she likes better. Aim for 5 a day. There are a lot of delicious healthy recipes for whatever kind of palate she might have

- Incorporate lean protein and complex carbs into daily diet.

- Keep junk food and candy out of the house, especially the prepackaged kind. If you want a treat, go out as a family together for ice cream. Feel free to get occasional fries or chips when you are out at a game or wherever. Also feel free to cook together occasionally to make homemade treats.

- Invite her to participate in meal planning and cooking.

- Never talk about "bad foods" or "good foods". You can say that veggies and fruits are chock full of nutrients that help her body grow and get stronger and it's important to eat them every day. You can also say that some foods have less of those wonderful nutrients, so you shouldn't fill up on them. In general, don't make food such a big focus on your daily lives. Eat to live, don't live to eat.

- If portions are a problem, just make enough food for your family and portion out your plates for dinner. If they are still hungry and want seconds, there is none left, but make sure there are plenty of fruit and veggies available if they are still hungry.

- Talk during meals, it slows the eating down. Keep it light and positive.

- Water only, no juices or sugary drinks.

- Be good role models for healthy and balanced (not restrictive) eating habits and positive body image

- Be active as a family on the weekends and after school if possible.

This is good in theory but impractical. Kids can overeat anything, but they especially like the carb stuff that nearly all households have: cereal, pretzels, granola bars, bread, pasta, rice. And high calorie foods like nuts, cheese, BP, avocados. While don’t have “junk” food, you still may need to say no, you can’t have a second bowl of plain cheerios or a second bowl of nuts, or no to a second giant handful of cashews. And cooking meals with “no leftovers”ever isn’t practical either and nearly impossibly to do.

And while the “good/bad” food thing is popular no no saying, it shouldn’t be. Maybe you don’t have to specifically use the words good and bad, but you do need to explain why you can have as much broccoli as your heart desires, but you shouldn’t do that with Snickers. Why you should only eat one serving of ice cream and cake at a birthday and not “as much as you want” Kids need to know. Especially if “as much as they want to eat” is really too much

Yep. In my house you can add more green beans or whatever vegetable is being offered. If you are still not full, there are always apples, oranges and bananas. and you can have apples, oranges and/or bananas anytime you want -- there are no restrictions on those. But you are definitely not eating as much rice as you want.

This is so toxic. There is nothing wrong with rice, and a banana is not better for you than rice is. Why should a hungry kid who’s just had sports practice eat 3 apples instead of an extra serving of rice? Also, rice is boring - anyone who’s given the opportunity to “binge” on rice is going to get bored of it pretty fast. You make it exciting by restricting it.

So you wouldn’t have any issue with your clinically overweight kid having a third serving of rice at dinner?

I have a lot of questions about this scenario. Why is my kid overweight? If they weren’t active that day, why are they eating so much rice - is it a hormonal thing? An emotional thing? And also, what is wrong with me that I’m cooking boatloads of rice for one meal than policing how much people eat? Ultimately, it doesn’t seem like the answer in this scenario is just to tell the kid no more rice.

So you would restrict by cooking less rice. Isn't that still restricting? What happens when your child decides she can just cook more rice than you would cook?

And if they want to go through the trouble of making extra rice, fine, they must really be hungry!

If they are that hungry, don't you think that they would eat extra meat, vegetables, fruits, etc, rather than wait an extra 20-30 minutes for the second/third serving of rice to cook? After all, you indicated that rice isn't that special, right?

That is sort of the point. Many kids will want more rice, pasta, bread, but when told no, but they can have more vegetables or meat will say no. Plenty of times, kids (like adults) just want the tasty carbs but aren’t actually still hungry. This is why it is ok to restrict. Plus even if you don’t have a morsel of white flour or sugar in your house, there are the plentiful birthday parties, playdates, restaurants, trip food. Do you let your kid have 4 pieces of pizza and 2 pieces of cake at a birthday just because they want to? Some kids are totally good at self regulating and some aren’t. If they aren’t, it is your job as a parent to help them find that balance.

No, the child knows what its body wants/needs, and at that moment it’s not meat, fruits, or vegetables. If I were hungry at 3 pm and wanted a banana, and someone told me “no, bananas are bad, here’s a pork chop!”, I would probably also say no bc I just don’t want a pork chop right then. It doesn’t mean I wasn’t hungry.

[Anonymous]

> 70% of adults are overweight and that is only going to increase. A lot of your thin and normal weight kids will be overweight one day too if you don’t teach them about portions and moderation; what food to eat in abundance and what foods require more disciplined approach