Anyone horny but don't want sex with DH/DW

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:What if a spouse just changes a lot in ways that aren’t attractive and they don’t want to do anything about it? It happens. What if your spouse changes their look and you just don’t find appealing and it doesn’t everything but turn you on. And they’re no longer your type. I know someone with a husband who did this. Or they pick up a habit that drives you nuts and they refuse to change it. You still like them as a person but you just aren’t attracted to what they do.


The examples you offer are not the best, but the broader concept reflected in the above post is quite simple -- people grow apart in a variety of different ways, and usually they become less interested in one another when that happens.
Anonymous
Please don't tell your husband you lost respect for him. He will never be able to unhear those words. Find a diplomatic way to tell him you both need to work on resolving the festering issue.

He may not know that you haven't been able to put it behind you, but whatever you do, assuming you *want* to regain your desire for him, be careful to use language that doesn't alienate him. People here can be big fans of "telling it like it is" but you know your DH best. Use the language that keeps both of you focused on the goal.
Anonymous
Try marriage counseling
Anonymous
Just divorce already. He is broken, you are nuts and I don’t want to share the streets with you.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes resentment is used as an after-the-fact explanation for loss of libido. The libido was going anyway. The wife tells herself it's because of this or that transgression by the husband. But it's really just a hormonal shift from diminishing novelty, aging, pregnancy or the like.


Nope. I thought I lost my libido from having kids. But really it was because of resentment towards DH and the stress our marriage caused. Once we split, my libido came back stronger than ever.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes resentment is used as an after-the-fact explanation for loss of libido. The libido was going anyway. The wife tells herself it's because of this or that transgression by the husband. But it's really just a hormonal shift from diminishing novelty, aging, pregnancy or the like.


Spot on.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes resentment is used as an after-the-fact explanation for loss of libido. The libido was going anyway. The wife tells herself it's because of this or that transgression by the husband. But it's really just a hormonal shift from diminishing novelty, aging, pregnancy or the like.


Spot on.


If this were true, there would only be one child in every single family. Somehow there are couples that go on to have sex after the first pregnancy, and with the wife in her late 30s/40s, after 10 years of marriage. You can't blame hormones for all human behavior.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes resentment is used as an after-the-fact explanation for loss of libido. The libido was going anyway. The wife tells herself it's because of this or that transgression by the husband. But it's really just a hormonal shift from diminishing novelty, aging, pregnancy or the like.


Hey idiot, try READING tge post next time. She WANTS to have sex, she has a strong libido.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes resentment is used as an after-the-fact explanation for loss of libido. The libido was going anyway. The wife tells herself it's because of this or that transgression by the husband. But it's really just a hormonal shift from diminishing novelty, aging, pregnancy or the like.


Hey idiot, try READING tge post next time. She WANTS to have sex, she has a strong libido.

Wow! So much anger! Are you not getting any either?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Just divorce already. He is broken, you are nuts and I don’t want to share the streets with you.

I’m sure that few people want to share the streets with you either. WTF?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes resentment is used as an after-the-fact explanation for loss of libido. The libido was going anyway. The wife tells herself it's because of this or that transgression by the husband. But it's really just a hormonal shift from diminishing novelty, aging, pregnancy or the like.


Spot on.
NOPE!!!!

We found the Misogynists who don't understand women and can't stand the thought for one second that they did anything wrong in their relationship.
Anonymous
Get an AP. Life is too short to not have satisfying, soul-nourishing sex.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Get an AP. Life is too short to not have satisfying, soul-nourishing sex.


Or maybe just maybe she could talk things out with her DH maybe with a counselor and get resolution to her resentment. Your plan is the easy, cowardly way.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes resentment is used as an after-the-fact explanation for loss of libido. The libido was going anyway. The wife tells herself it's because of this or that transgression by the husband. But it's really just a hormonal shift from diminishing novelty, aging, pregnancy or the like.

umm no. Why would we do that?


Because hormones are invisible. The human brain is constantly creating narratives, trying to explain things (that's how, for example, humans came to believe in lightning gods for centuries). Resentment is a plausible explanation.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sometimes resentment is used as an after-the-fact explanation for loss of libido. The libido was going anyway. The wife tells herself it's because of this or that transgression by the husband. But it's really just a hormonal shift from diminishing novelty, aging, pregnancy or the like.


Nope. I thought I lost my libido from having kids. But really it was because of resentment towards DH and the stress our marriage caused. Once we split, my libido came back stronger than ever.


Novelty is sexy.
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