S/O - Questions for female cheaters

[Anonymous]

I haven’t cheated in my marriage, but I did on a boyfriend. He refused to have sex with me in the 2 years we were together; I went away for work for a few weeks and hit it off with someone. It was hard to say no after 2 years of no sex. No regrets, it was the best sex of my life. It took another year for me to dump him, during which I cheated with a few people.

I know I’ll probably get criticized but I had tried everything to make him interested. If he had wanted me to slide down a stripper pole in a gorilla suit, I would have. I had also tried to break up with him but he threatened suicide every time I did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only married woman cheating on my DH even while sleeping with him?

Honey, is that you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only married woman cheating on my DH even while sleeping with him?

Nope. I have regular sex with my hubby. It’s bland, boring and really quick. I have as much sex as I can with my lover because it’s the complete opposite. I’ve always been a cheater. I didn’t cheat while I was engaged because I wanted to prove to myself that the marriage was the right thing. I did cheat within a month of being married to prove I still had it plus I couldn’t resist my ex who was pissed I got married. I life complicated? Hell yes.

So, why don't you end it? He clearly deserves better than you. Granted, that's a low bar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only married woman cheating on my DH even while sleeping with him?

Nope. I have regular sex with my hubby. It’s bland, boring and really quick. I have as much sex as I can with my lover because it’s the complete opposite. I’ve always been a cheater. I didn’t cheat while I was engaged because I wanted to prove to myself that the marriage was the right thing. I did cheat within a month of being married to prove I still had it plus I couldn’t resist my ex who was pissed I got married. I life complicated? Hell yes.

So, why don't you end it? He clearly deserves better than you. Granted, that's a low bar.

Yep she is a woman and no one will blame you for cheating if you are a woman. It’s the job of your boyfriend/husband to keep you entertained. If a guy can not keep you from cheating, its his fault!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only married woman cheating on my DH even while sleeping with him?

Nope. I have regular sex with my hubby. It’s bland, boring and really quick. I have as much sex as I can with my lover because it’s the complete opposite. I’ve always been a cheater. I didn’t cheat while I was engaged because I wanted to prove to myself that the marriage was the right thing. I did cheat within a month of being married to prove I still had it plus I couldn’t resist my ex who was pissed I got married. I life complicated? Hell yes.

What makes the lover so much better? Is there something the dh can change?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only married woman cheating on my DH even while sleeping with him?

Nope. I have regular sex with my hubby. It’s bland, boring and really quick. I have as much sex as I can with my lover because it’s the complete opposite. I’ve always been a cheater. I didn’t cheat while I was engaged because I wanted to prove to myself that the marriage was the right thing. I did cheat within a month of being married to prove I still had it plus I couldn’t resist my ex who was pissed I got married. I life complicated? Hell yes.

What makes the lover so much better? Is there something the dh can change?

He's not her DH. She gets off on the cheating. It has nothing to do with him except that he has the misfortune of being married to her.

[Anonymous]

I cheated after being married for 10 years and 2 kids. My AP is better looking, charming and funny in comparison to my husband. DH is rigid, controlling and cold. I don't want to divorce because of the kids. I am financially independent and safe. DH is not a great husband but a great father. Also, my AP never wants to get married again after a bad experience. So, we have fun and sex together, great time overall.

[Anonymous]

About six years into my marriage we were going through a very difficult period - two careers, a new baby and my DH seeming to have no interest in me physically. I will skip the long story. I was away at a week long career/personal development seminar where we were placed into teams of ten people (all strangers) who you worked with the entire week. That amount of time created incredible bonding among the individuals and one guy and I really connected. On the last night there was a big dinner and afterwards with very little thought I invited him back to my room. I remember how good it felt to be wanted physically but even during it I was thinking what the F am I doing since I still loved my husband despite our problems. I never told my DH about it or ever had contact with the guy. A month or so later my DH and I reconnected physically and 20+ years later we still connect and are very happy. I'm not proud of what I did but it may have helped me in some strange way.

[Anonymous]

I cheated. We'd been married for 5 years. One child who was 2 at the time. In retrospect, I think a couple things were going on. Our marriage was not great before having a child in that we were not at the same place in life. We have a 9 year age difference. He was very established in his career, and I basically did not have a career but a job. It seemed like this would be good for our marriage as it would be helpful to have one parent with flexibility. In reality, what that meant was that my husband expected me to do 100% of the childcare and home maintenance stuff, while also working full time in a mind-numbing job. I think I was probably struggling with postpartum depression and those first two years of parenting really destroyed what was left of our marriage. I cheated with a long time friend who was there for me emotionally when my husband wasn't. I regret cheating because I feel that cheating caused me to lose the moral highground I would otherwise have had. I do not regret leaving the marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only married woman cheating on my DH even while sleeping with him?

Nope. I have regular sex with my hubby. It’s bland, boring and really quick. I have as much sex as I can with my lover because it’s the complete opposite. I’ve always been a cheater. I didn’t cheat while I was engaged because I wanted to prove to myself that the marriage was the right thing. I did cheat within a month of being married to prove I still had it plus I couldn’t resist my ex who was pissed I got married. I life complicated? Hell yes.

What makes the lover so much better? Is there something the dh can change?

He’s part horse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:About six years into my marriage we were going through a very difficult period - two careers, a new baby and my DH seeming to have no interest in me physically. I will skip the long story. I was away at a week long career/personal development seminar where we were placed into teams of ten people (all strangers) who you worked with the entire week. That amount of time created incredible bonding among the individuals and one guy and I really connected. On the last night there was a big dinner and afterwards with very little thought I invited him back to my room. I remember how good it felt to be wanted physically but even during it I was thinking what the F am I doing since I still loved my husband despite our problems. I never told my DH about it or ever had contact with the guy. A month or so later my DH and I reconnected physically and 20+ years later we still connect and are very happy. I'm not proud of what I did but it may have helped me in some strange way.

I think people would be surprised how often these one and done things happen. I had a similar experience, wife has no idea. It was super fun, but also came with stress of potential STDs, someone out there having the power to screw up my life etc. It also made me feel whole again after years of sexual libido mismatch, and also rekindled our intimacy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only married woman cheating on my DH even while sleeping with him?

Nope. I have regular sex with my hubby. It’s bland, boring and really quick. I have as much sex as I can with my lover because it’s the complete opposite. I’ve always been a cheater. I didn’t cheat while I was engaged because I wanted to prove to myself that the marriage was the right thing. I did cheat within a month of being married to prove I still had it plus I couldn’t resist my ex who was pissed I got married. I life complicated? Hell yes.

What makes the lover so much better? Is there something the dh can change?

Unfortunately it can’t change - he is just small and not satisfying. I will use my toy with hubby so I can orgasm but he just can’t hit my hot spots when we are together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only married woman cheating on my DH even while sleeping with him?

Nope. I have regular sex with my hubby. It’s bland, boring and really quick. I have as much sex as I can with my lover because it’s the complete opposite. I’ve always been a cheater. I didn’t cheat while I was engaged because I wanted to prove to myself that the marriage was the right thing. I did cheat within a month of being married to prove I still had it plus I couldn’t resist my ex who was pissed I got married. I life complicated? Hell yes.

What makes the lover so much better? Is there something the dh can change?

He's not her DH. She gets off on the cheating. It has nothing to do with him except that he has the misfortune of being married to her.

It’s a little bit of both. The cheating is exciting and like the previous poster noted. Lover is part horse and size does matter. He’s happy enough being married I take care of his needs and mine too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only married woman cheating on my DH even while sleeping with him?

Nope. I have regular sex with my hubby. It’s bland, boring and really quick. I have as much sex as I can with my lover because it’s the complete opposite. I’ve always been a cheater. I didn’t cheat while I was engaged because I wanted to prove to myself that the marriage was the right thing. I did cheat within a month of being married to prove I still had it plus I couldn’t resist my ex who was pissed I got married. I life complicated? Hell yes.

What makes the lover so much better? Is there something the dh can change?

Unfortunately it can’t change - he is just small and not satisfying. I will use my toy with hubby so I can orgasm but he just can’t hit my hot spots when we are together.

Presumably you knew this when you married him...

[Anonymous]

I never planned on doing it, but I was deeply unhappy in my marriage (married a man for convenience, not love at 23) and wanted to give DH a reason to give me a divorce that avoided the conversation where I had to tell him that I wasn't even in love with him on our wedding day and should've followed my gut instinct after our first kiss to end the relationship. It was kind of a trend of using cheating to escape a hard conversation to end a relationship I didn't want.