sleeping with the boss but can't end it

[Anonymous]

This cannot be real, but it is almost too pathetic to be a troll post?

[Anonymous]

Haah to those that think partners are good writers or have mastered the english language. Making partner nowadays consists mostly of hard work and luck. Him sleeping around is probably enough to make partner.

This is coming from a recent partner. I hitched my wagon to the right partner, and he helped me all the way. Went to bat for me to make partner, gave some of his business. I've met people twice as smart as me that get stuck in the back office.

You're also writing on DCUM, so don't judge a man by his writing on here. YOu can judge him by the stupid move of sleeping with an emotionally unstable woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cool story, bro. Now back to reality.

Yeah ... I'm guessing this is one of our resident "switch the genders" trolls.

[Anonymous]

You know the part when HR told you to read the employee manual and not to date co-workers? Yeah, this is why.

[Anonymous]

Op here

I didn't think my writing would be judged by the grammar nazis. Writing on your phone has never been harder.

I understand I made a dumb move. I think it is apparent for everyone to see that I wasn't thinking this through. But it just happened. She was being very complimentary towards me as well. The alcohol played its part and the rest is history. She knew what she was doing and what she wanted out of this relationship. She's calculating.

As far as making partner. I'm expecting that to happen over the next two years (would be non-equity at first). So it's not right now. The partner I work for has been a big advocate of mine. He is a very nice guy, and has been my mentor. I debated telling him, but that would probably end all hopes I have of moving anywhere in the legal world.

I think people that said i need to end things with her while maintaining a professional relationship fail to see that this isn't just a sex situation. She is almost like a girlfriend now. It's a weird dynamic, but she is possessive and jealous. I basically stopped seeing the girl i was dating because it was upsetting her so much. I know how that looks.

Leaving the firm is a possibility. I don't know. I'm pretty confused.

[Anonymous]

Troll - no associate up for partner would butcher the English language to the same extent. Please study remedial grammar and then do a re-write.

[Anonymous]

Find another job.

Sue for sexual harassment. She’s your boss.

[Anonymous]

Eh, roll with it... enjoy it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Troll - no associate up for partner would butcher the English language to the same extent. Please study remedial grammar and then do a re-write.

Why would someone troll like that? I liked his story. He should have discussed the love making more. The story is missing some "naughty" details. OP, are you British? Who uses the word naughty?

[Anonymous]

Typical DCUM comments.

Troll.
Story is fake.
OP, you're an idiot.
Get a new job.

Now if the story isn't fake, you've put yourself in quite the conundrum. I would say leave. This isn't getting any better. Or push her to leave her husband. Sort of unfair that she hates you dating and she is married.

[Anonymous]

Yes, you are being stupid. You chose to sleep with a married partner regardless of her flattery, the alcohol and/or her being calculating. Didn’t you take the ethics exam? (Don’t co-mingle funds and don’t sleep with clients or direct reports either up or down.) Break it off now while you are a few years from partner - and start thinking where you can move because you may have to. I would say the same to a female associate in your position.

[Anonymous]

i can guarantee that law ethics never says don't sleep with your boss in a law firm. We all know the don't sleep with "active" clients, but nothing about don't sleep with your boss.

Source: ethics attorney.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here

I didn't think my writing would be judged by the grammar nazis. Writing on your phone has never been harder.

I understand I made a dumb move. I think it is apparent for everyone to see that I wasn't thinking this through. But it just happened. She was being very complimentary towards me as well. The alcohol played its part and the rest is history. She knew what she was doing and what she wanted out of this relationship. She's calculating.

As far as making partner. I'm expecting that to happen over the next two years (would be non-equity at first). So it's not right now. The partner I work for has been a big advocate of mine. He is a very nice guy, and has been my mentor. I debated telling him, but that would probably end all hopes I have of moving anywhere in the legal world.

I think people that said i need to end things with her while maintaining a professional relationship fail to see that this isn't just a sex situation. She is almost like a girlfriend now. It's a weird dynamic, but she is possessive and jealous. I basically stopped seeing the girl i was dating because it was upsetting her so much. I know how that looks.

Leaving the firm is a possibility. I don't know. I'm pretty confused.

So she’s a likely a good lawyer, and obviously why she’s partner.

You’re screwed, btw, especially if you think you can do this without hell and brimfire.

[Anonymous]

OP if this is remotely true you are pretty dumb.

Poor judgement destroys many no matter what kind of job or education you have. Probably time to get another job.

[Anonymous]

You stop doing what she likes about you. If you are giving her all this attention, then just stop complimenting her, paying attention to her, listening to her. Keep going on these dates, but interrupt her, talk about yourself constantly, don't comment on her looks at all, be dismissive, answer in one word answers, etc.

Once she breaks up with you, keep all her sexual texts, emails, record some phone conversations and save all those for when you're up for partner. When you are up for partner, you approach her and ask her to go to bat for you. Don't threaten or say anything about all the texts, emails, etc. but just ask her to push for your partnership. If she says no or doesn't, then you mention the evidence of sexual harassment.