How would you react if your date left to go help/comfort his ex?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Too much drama. I am out


Not only that, but the psycho who beat her up will likely turn his anger on your bf and anyone he happens to be with. BTDT Way too much drama!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Too much drama. I am out


This.
Anonymous
So it just happened that, at the time you were together on a date, she reached out to this man to tell him about what happened to her?

Considering how many hours there are in a day, and how many days in a week, it's interesting that her need happened to coincide with the hours allocated for your date.
Anonymous
At that moment I would be fine with him going. Someone was just victimized and in need of support and that person in that moment needs him. I would see it as a positive that he went. She sees him as a safe supportive person and that's a good thing and I am glad she reached out to et the support she needed given the violence she just experienced.

It would raise questions for me about the relationship overall and moving forward. I would want to know more about the frequency of communication with his ex, ongoing feelings etc. also was this a ten year marriage ex or 6 month relationship. Is he her main support on a regular basis?

To me in the end it could be fine or it could be a problem depending on the context
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:So it just happened that, at the time you were together on a date, she reached out to this man to tell him about what happened to her?

Considering how many hours there are in a day, and how many days in a week, it's interesting that her need happened to coincide with the hours allocated for your date.


As a DV survivor, I can tell you that this woman probably had need of help every day and probably didn't wait until her ex had a date to be beaten.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:So it just happened that, at the time you were together on a date, she reached out to this man to tell him about what happened to her?

Considering how many hours there are in a day, and how many days in a week, it's interesting that her need happened to coincide with the hours allocated for your date.


As a DV survivor, I can tell you that this woman probably had need of help every day and probably didn't wait until her ex had a date to be beaten.


Sure, that's possible. The alternative is also possible.
Anonymous
She probably started dating again first, so he had to start so he didn't look pathetic. Now that her run at dating is over, they're getting back together. Move on.
Anonymous
Let's face it. This woman wants male comfort and attention. If she got beat up, she should call the police, and that's that. She did not call this guy to come over and have him get the other guy out of there or otherwise provide immediate help. She called him because she wants sympathy and a guy next to her.

He should have told her to call the police and call her mom/sister/friend.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:So it just happened that, at the time you were together on a date, she reached out to this man to tell him about what happened to her?

Considering how many hours there are in a day, and how many days in a week, it's interesting that her need happened to coincide with the hours allocated for your date.


As a DV survivor, I can tell you that this woman probably had need of help every day and probably didn't wait until her ex had a date to be beaten.


As another DV survivor, I agree that she probably needs help every day. But there are more appropriate places to seek that help than an ex-boyfriend.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I'd block his number. She still has her hooks in him.


+1

I have clean breaks, no one would call me for help. So he's still hooking up with her.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:So it just happened that, at the time you were together on a date, she reached out to this man to tell him about what happened to her?

Considering how many hours there are in a day, and how many days in a week, it's interesting that her need happened to coincide with the hours allocated for your date.


Yes that is a conveniently timed crisis, and it is also convenient that he has not blocked his ex to allow himself to move on. He is still so available to meet her needs and respond to this or any crisis. Maybe he stays in touch because he is her personal emergency responder.

Lots of questions, but the overall answer is obvious. Best of luck with the ex, good bye.
Anonymous
Why do you have to ask?
Don't pick up the phone/answer texts anymore. No more dates.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:So it just happened that, at the time you were together on a date, she reached out to this man to tell him about what happened to her?

Considering how many hours there are in a day, and how many days in a week, it's interesting that her need happened to coincide with the hours allocated for your date.


As a DV survivor, I can tell you that this woman probably had need of help every day and probably didn't wait until her ex had a date to be beaten.


As another DV survivor, I agree that she probably needs help every day. But there are more appropriate places to seek that help than an ex-boyfriend.


She may have called the police, visited the hospital, and still needed help.

When my friend's husband broke her door in and assaulted her, the hospital released her at 3 am with Tylenol and an ice pack. She needed someone to help her secure her home. Luckily, she had female friends willing to send their DH, but maybe this ex is the only guy she knew who could come. Or her bf might have taken her cell and the ex is the only number she memorized of someone nearby. It's not like you can Taskrabbit this.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:At that moment I would be fine with him going. Someone was just victimized and in need of support and that person in that moment needs him. I would see it as a positive that he went. She sees him as a safe supportive person and that's a good thing and I am glad she reached out to et the support she needed given the violence she just experienced.

It would raise questions for me about the relationship overall and moving forward. I would want to know more about the frequency of communication with his ex, ongoing feelings etc. also was this a ten year marriage ex or 6 month relationship. Is he her main support on a regular basis?

To me in the end it could be fine or it could be a problem depending on the context


This. It's a big red flag that I'd keep my eye on and look into, but I wouldn't end the relationship immediately.
Anonymous
We would both go so I know for a fact that's what happened.
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