Should DD be upset most of her friends went to beachhouse weekend of her open house?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's taking it personally. Her big core group of friends decided late last week to go to a family beach house. She was sulking Saturday, the day of her open house. I saw she tweeted a couple passive aggressive tweets about "real friends." I told her to delete them. She showed me their instagram photos and all of them were saying "best weekend of my life!" It was like a last hurrah because a few of the girls are leaving for college in a week.

Well, she is upset, and probably "but you shouldn't be upset" isn't going to make her stop being upset.

Nonetheless, the end of high school is a good time to learn (if you haven't already) that if it isn't about you, don't make it about you.

[Anonymous]

An open house party is the same as a drop in. That's what we called them when I graduated. Very boring for kids. It's all for adults. Like a tea party.
If the girls said they were coming then, yes your DD is probably angry. If she wasn't invited then she is probably hurt. Of course. If it just so happened that the open house and beach weekend fell on the same day and she had to prioritize the party that adults threw for her, sucks but thats life. And she should get off social media for a day until the next "best thing ever" is trending with her friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't blame your daughter for being upset if she thought her friends were coming to her party and then all went away without her at the last minute. How long ago had she invited them to her party? Had they RSVP'd?

Where are the girls who are leaving in a week going to college? Are they going to service academies, which start during the summer, or just starting at a regular college during the summer session? I'd have a little more sympathy for kids going off to a service academy and they want a fun weekend before a summer of what is essentially basic training.

Two are service academy, half dozen are beginning summer semester. This might've been last time all get together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't blame your daughter for being upset if she thought her friends were coming to her party and then all went away without her at the last minute. How long ago had she invited them to her party? Had they RSVP'd?

Where are the girls who are leaving in a week going to college? Are they going to service academies, which start during the summer, or just starting at a regular college during the summer session? I'd have a little more sympathy for kids going off to a service academy and they want a fun weekend before a summer of what is essentially basic training.

+1 I don't blame your daughter for being upset at all, especially if the other friends were posting about what a fantastic time they were having!

If there is any good news in this scenario, it's that your daughter will likely make a bunch of new friends at college, and this situation and these friends will mean less to her in the near future.

[Anonymous]

These friends obviously weren't friends. Especially if she wanted invited. I would be stuck back on wasn't invited. It might make the transition to college easier honestly since she won't regret leaving friends. I am so sorry for your daughter.

[Anonymous]

Was your daughter invited to the beachhouse?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's taking it personally. Her big core group of friends decided late last week to go to a family beach house. She was sulking Saturday, the day of her open house. I saw she tweeted a couple passive aggressive tweets about "real friends." I told her to delete them. She showed me their instagram photos and all of them were saying "best weekend of my life!" It was like a last hurrah because a few of the girls are leaving for college in a week.

My niece also had an "open house" type of graduation party. 5-8 for family and 9-12 for friends but it was advertised as 5-12 Open House.

Anyway.... yes, she should take it personally. Her friends were inconsiderate of her feelings.

It's okay to be sad when your friends dis you.
It's not okay to send rude messages... glad you had her delete them.

Say, "I'm sorry your friends suck. I would be hurt to. In reality we are lucky to go through this world with a handful of good friends."

This is reality, some people care more about "having fun" than their friends feelings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your teen DD owns a home? I think the general advice is to go away the weekend of your open house. Or is this college orientation? Why are you involved in this anyway? Sure, I'd be sad I was missing out if I was your DD but that's life.

12th grade graduation. The group of friends is really clean cut, too. Good clean fun.

What in the hell is 12th grade graduation. Do you mean high school graduation. And who cares if the kids are clean cut...you don't know how they act when they aren't around adults.
Also, your DD is probably over it by now. You need to move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Was your daughter invited to the beachhouse?

Yes.

[Anonymous]

Graduation parties can be nice, but unless it's the party of the century with no parents in sight there is little chance that a group of seniors will choose that over a beach house. Maybe the closest of friends will forego the beach trip in the name of loyalty, but they probably won't be happy about it.

[Anonymous]

That's why you have your open house the day of graduation. That's the norm around here. 80% of the parents do this and the kids and other parents just float between them.

I know 2 days after graduation, most teens have headed out for either a graduation vacation or OC, MD beach week.

[Anonymous]

Did the kids know it was a graduation party? Maybe they thought it was some adult thing if your DD called it an Open House. You should have had her graduation party the day of graduation like everybody else. This is just weird. If you are looking for it to be somebody's fault then it is yours. I really think it's just a life thing and she needs to get over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was your daughter invited to the beachhouse?

Yes.

Then why is she upset? Sounds spoiled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did the kids know it was a graduation party? Maybe they thought it was some adult thing if your DD called it an Open House. You should have had her graduation party the day of graduation like everybody else. This is just weird. If you are looking for it to be somebody's fault then it is yours. I really think it's just a life thing and she needs to get over it.

Yes, they knew. They chose the impromptu Fri-Mon beach house weekend over attending her grad party.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Graduation parties can be nice, but unless it's the party of the century with no parents in sight there is little chance that a group of seniors will choose that over a beach house. Maybe the closest of friends will forego the beach trip in the name of loyalty, but they probably won't be happy about it.

+1 I think it's just bad timing. I'm curious why you had it after school is out? Or are you in a really late district? Most of our invitations were for a couple weeks ago.