Men, how do you feel about being cheated on?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have read that female infidelity is much more likely to result in divorce than male infidelity. I am sure there are a number of reasons for this, some economic. But I also suspect this is something men can't get over. Will be interested to see the replies,to your question OP.

It is pretty interesting. If I had to offer a theory, it's that most women make a very, very big deal about how sex is sacred, how it's so intimate, and how they could never imagine having sex with someone who they aren't absolutely in love with (and yes, I know this is largely horseshit).

Meanwhile, guys pretty much admit they'd fuck a pie if it was warm.

So when women cheat, men usually figure it's about more than just sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting question. Male here, I do not believe monogamy is natural. I find it suffocating. I can also seperate love from sex, and I accept that few marriages make it to death do us part without someone screwing up at some point. We have a great marriage, so I wouldn't be so quick to throw it away because of cheating.

If DW cheated as in one night stand, I would forgive her. I would also use that as a reason why I should be able to get it on outside of marriage.

If she was having a long affair I would be very hurt. Not just the emotional betrayal, but because I am the one constantly looking for more sex within the marriage. If she were turning me down while cheating, it would be hard to not take it personal. My marriage may not survive if it was a long drawn out affair.

She could be turning a H down and having an affair because the H is not great in bed, or she's bored with H, same as why some H have affairs.

Or because she gets the emotional intimacy from her AP that she doesn't get from her husband, and that's why she's turned on by her AP and not her husband. I mean, PP basically said he doesn't give a shit about her emotional life, because he wouldn't care about that betrayal. She's basically a sex toy to him.

Oh, dear lord, the projection in this comment is so thick you could cut it with a butter knife.

I'm sorry for your pain, PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The penis goes into the vagina, meaning a man gives sex to someone else whereas a woman choses to allow someone in.

That's the basic mental and physical psychology as to why female cheating is worse than male cheating.

I find both despicable.

How do you feel about NSA sex in general (between consenting adults who are not married)?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The penis goes into the vagina, meaning a man gives sex to someone else whereas a woman choses to allow someone in.

That's the basic mental and physical psychology as to why female cheating is worse than male cheating.

I find both despicable.

How do you feel about NSA sex in general (between consenting adults who are not married)?

have at it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have read that female infidelity is much more likely to result in divorce than male infidelity. I am sure there are a number of reasons for this, some economic. But I also suspect this is something men can't get over. Will be interested to see the replies,to your question OP.

It is pretty interesting. If I had to offer a theory, it's that most women make a very, very big deal about how sex is sacred, how it's so intimate, and how they could never imagine having sex with someone who they aren't absolutely in love with (and yes, I know this is largely horseshit).

Meanwhile, guys pretty much admit they'd fuck a pie if it was warm.

So when women cheat, men usually figure it's about more than just sex.

I think an interesting thing to see is, in those cases where a marriage ends due to infidelity, who's doing the filing and is the person who was cheated on, or was it the cheater, and if that varies depending on whether it's the husband or wife cheating. Because sex is so much more emotional for women than men, I suspect that when women cheat, it's more likely to be because, to them, the marriage is truly over but they can't pull the trigger and divorce. Since men don't associate the two as much, they're more likely to cheat when they still want to be married to their spouse. So when the affair is discovered, women are more likely to decide that they're just done, it's not worth trying to repair the damage, and they file for divorce, whereas when men are caught, they're more likely to want to work things out with their spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting question. Male here, I do not believe monogamy is natural. I find it suffocating. I can also seperate love from sex, and I accept that few marriages make it to death do us part without someone screwing up at some point. We have a great marriage, so I wouldn't be so quick to throw it away because of cheating.

If DW cheated as in one night stand, I would forgive her. I would also use that as a reason why I should be able to get it on outside of marriage.

If she was having a long affair I would be very hurt. Not just the emotional betrayal, but because I am the one constantly looking for more sex within the marriage. If she were turning me down while cheating, it would be hard to not take it personal. My marriage may not survive if it was a long drawn out affair.

She could be turning a H down and having an affair because the H is not great in bed, or she's bored with H, same as why some H have affairs.

Or because she gets the emotional intimacy from her AP that she doesn't get from her husband, and that's why she's turned on by her AP and not her husband. I mean, PP basically said he doesn't give a shit about her emotional life, because he wouldn't care about that betrayal. She's basically a sex toy to him.

Oh, dear lord, the projection in this comment is so thick you could cut it with a butter knife.

I'm sorry for your pain, PP.

My marriage is just fine, but thanks?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have read that female infidelity is much more likely to result in divorce than male infidelity. I am sure there are a number of reasons for this, some economic. But I also suspect this is something men can't get over. Will be interested to see the replies,to your question OP.

It is pretty interesting. If I had to offer a theory, it's that most women make a very, very big deal about how sex is sacred, how it's so intimate, and how they could never imagine having sex with someone who they aren't absolutely in love with (and yes, I know this is largely horseshit).

Meanwhile, guys pretty much admit they'd fuck a pie if it was warm.

So when women cheat, men usually figure it's about more than just sex.

I think an interesting thing to see is, in those cases where a marriage ends due to infidelity, who's doing the filing and is the person who was cheated on, or was it the cheater, and if that varies depending on whether it's the husband or wife cheating. Because sex is so much more emotional for women than men, I suspect that when women cheat, it's more likely to be because, to them, the marriage is truly over but they can't pull the trigger and divorce. Since men don't associate the two as much, they're more likely to cheat when they still want to be married to their spouse. So when the affair is discovered, women are more likely to decide that they're just done, it's not worth trying to repair the damage, and they file for divorce, whereas when men are caught, they're more likely to want to work things out with their spouse.

Sure, only I think the idea that "sex is so much more emotional for women than men" is largely a sexist stereotype. So when the affair is discovered, women are just as likely to say, "But honey, he means nothing to me!" but because the sexist narrative is so ingrained, men can't get over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting question. Male here, I do not believe monogamy is natural. I find it suffocating. I can also seperate love from sex, and I accept that few marriages make it to death do us part without someone screwing up at some point. We have a great marriage, so I wouldn't be so quick to throw it away because of cheating.

If DW cheated as in one night stand, I would forgive her. I would also use that as a reason why I should be able to get it on outside of marriage.

If she was having a long affair I would be very hurt. Not just the emotional betrayal, but because I am the one constantly looking for more sex within the marriage. If she were turning me down while cheating, it would be hard to not take it personal. My marriage may not survive if it was a long drawn out affair.

She could be turning a H down and having an affair because the H is not great in bed, or she's bored with H, same as why some H have affairs.

Or because she gets the emotional intimacy from her AP that she doesn't get from her husband, and that's why she's turned on by her AP and not her husband. I mean, PP basically said he doesn't give a shit about her emotional life, because he wouldn't care about that betrayal. She's basically a sex toy to him.

Oh, dear lord, the projection in this comment is so thick you could cut it with a butter knife.

I'm sorry for your pain, PP.

My marriage is just fine, but thanks?

In that case, my condolences to your DS and their AP.

[Anonymous]

I have a ton of empathy for your ex. Finding out the person who you invested your life and heart in so strongly has shared their body with another person hurts worse than being stung by a wasp.

Really.

Even big boys cry.

What disturbs me more about this whole Ashley Madison thing is that possibly two people killed themselves over it.

While I have no sympathy in my heart for what they did, I AM sad that they felt they had no other option but to do away with their lives. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. ;'(

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a ton of empathy for your ex. Finding out the person who you invested your life and heart in so strongly has shared their body with another person hurts worse than being stung by a wasp.

Really.

Even big boys cry.

What disturbs me more about this whole Ashley Madison thing is that possibly two people killed themselves over it.

While I have no sympathy in my heart for what they did, I AM sad that they felt they had no other option but to do away with their lives. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. ;'(

you can't uncheat

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting question. Male here, I do not believe monogamy is natural. I find it suffocating. I can also seperate love from sex, and I accept that few marriages make it to death do us part without someone screwing up at some point. We have a great marriage, so I wouldn't be so quick to throw it away because of cheating.

If DW cheated as in one night stand, I would forgive her. I would also use that as a reason why I should be able to get it on outside of marriage.

If she was having a long affair I would be very hurt. Not just the emotional betrayal, but because I am the one constantly looking for more sex within the marriage. If she were turning me down while cheating, it would be hard to not take it personal. My marriage may not survive if it was a long drawn out affair.

She could be turning a H down and having an affair because the H is not great in bed, or she's bored with H, same as why some H have affairs.

Or because she gets the emotional intimacy from her AP that she doesn't get from her husband, and that's why she's turned on by her AP and not her husband. I mean, PP basically said he doesn't give a shit about her emotional life, because he wouldn't care about that betrayal. She's basically a sex toy to him.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting question. Male here, I do not believe monogamy is natural. I find it suffocating. I can also seperate love from sex, and I accept that few marriages make it to death do us part without someone screwing up at some point. We have a great marriage, so I wouldn't be so quick to throw it away because of cheating.

If DW cheated as in one night stand, I would forgive her. I would also use that as a reason why I should be able to get it on outside of marriage.

If she was having a long affair I would be very hurt. Not just the emotional betrayal, but because I am the one constantly looking for more sex within the marriage. If she were turning me down while cheating, it would be hard to not take it personal. My marriage may not survive if it was a long drawn out affair.

She could be turning a H down and having an affair because the H is not great in bed, or she's bored with H, same as why some H have affairs.

Or because she gets the emotional intimacy from her AP that she doesn't get from her husband, and that's why she's turned on by her AP and not her husband. I mean, PP basically said he doesn't give a shit about her emotional life, because he wouldn't care about that betrayal. She's basically a sex toy to him.

Oh, dear lord, the projection in this comment is so thick you could cut it with a butter knife.

I'm sorry for your pain, PP.

My marriage is just fine, but thanks?

In that case, my condolences to your DS and their AP.

NP here. You sound extremely confused. Did you accidentally respond to the wrong person?

[Anonymous]

Men are territorial: Hands off MY woman. I may not really want her all that much, but no one else can have her!

Men may consider themselves as open and available to that fantasy woman right around the corner, but when you tell them you think it's only fair that you also would like to date, albeit without sneaking around and lying, they simply won't have it. Been there. Called his damn bluff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Men are territorial: Hands off MY woman. I may not really want her all that much, but no one else can have her!

Men may consider themselves as open and available to that fantasy woman right around the corner, but when you tell them you think it's only fair that you also would like to date, albeit without sneaking around and lying, they simply won't have it. Been there. Called his damn bluff.

Also, women have it wayyyyy easier in finding casual sex. So if men are gonna play the "open relationship" game, they're gonna lose. Every time.

[Anonymous]

I have had 4 affairs (not proud of it, just being honest since we are anonymous). Yet I love my wife, just the physical side of our marriage had collapsed when the kids came along. All four female APs wanted far more than casual sex. They all had deep wounds in their marriages. 2 divorced, the other 2 will soon.

So I am totally understanding of affairs, and I would forgive my DW yet I have the admittedly sexist views that women generally cheat because of something deeply wrong with a relationship, whereas men cheat for sex. So if DW cheated, I would assume we had some very deep issues to resolve.