Kissed someone, not my DH

[Anonymous]

It's a wake up call. Either you need to deal with a drinking issue or put more energy into your relationship with DH. You need to listen to it.

It's not a silly thing.

[Anonymous]

The important thing is how you feel about what happened and whether or not it felt harmless amd girls' nighy out-y or I'm ready for a torrid affair. It's very normal to feel attracted to other people. The question is how do you and your spouse want to deal with it? Is flirting ok? The pearl clutching self-righteousness is is personally more obnoxious to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Define kiss. Was it a peck, a few seconds, make out session, something else?

Does it really matter?

[Anonymous]

Damn. If it had been me, meeting up with a guy friend with whom there had ever been sexual tension/ attraction, I would have (a) invited another friend along, (b) not gotten dolled up, and (c) gone for coffee, not drinks.

Sounds like you're a little "sorry, not sorry" OP. Just sayin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Damn. If it had been me, meeting up with a guy friend with whom there had ever been sexual tension/ attraction, I would have (a) invited another friend along, (b) not gotten dolled up, and (c) gone for coffee, not drinks.

Sounds like you're a little "sorry, not sorry" OP. Just sayin.

Read more closely. She didn't meet up with a guy friend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Define kiss. Was it a peck, a few seconds, make out session, something else?

Does it really matter?

There is a big difference between a dry peck and a make out session.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Damn. If it had been me, meeting up with a guy friend with whom there had ever been sexual tension/ attraction, I would have (a) invited another friend along, (b) not gotten dolled up, and (c) gone for coffee, not drinks.

Sounds like you're a little "sorry, not sorry" OP. Just sayin.

Read more closely. She didn't meet up with a guy friend.

Ah, I guess I thought the old college friend was a guy. Hm, so she was hit on my a hot stranger while out with a girl. Got it.

Well, now I guess my take is a little self-righteous: I've been dolled up in public with girlfriends and have never engaged a flirting stranger long enough for there to be even the remotest possibility of a kiss. Smile politely, maybe giggle, but flash your wedding ring and turn back to your girlfriends. Still seems a little sorry, not sorry to me.

[Anonymous]

1. You have confirmed you are still attractive.
2. Consider this event as a warning shot, and don't just brush it under the carpet.
3. Be a grown up and keep it to yourself. Don't tell anyone else who could use this information against you somehow- make you feel guilty, burden you with their opinions, judgement, or worse, want to revisit events with you over and over, and check up on you. This will make it very difficult to put behind you. This should be very private, not for all of your friends, mother, etc.
4. Take some time to evaluate what felt good, and what felt terrible and why. Maybe you will come to know yourself and what you want more clearly from this- and find the motivation to pursue it in either direction.
5. Consider forgiving yourself.

[Anonymous]

This is why you don't get married in your twenties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1. You have confirmed you are still attractive.
2. Consider this event as a warning shot, and don't just brush it under the carpet.
3. Be a grown up and keep it to yourself. Don't tell anyone else who could use this information against you somehow- make you feel guilty, burden you with their opinions, judgement, or worse, want to revisit events with you over and over, and check up on you. This will make it very difficult to put behind you. This should be very private, not for all of your friends, mother, etc.
4. Take some time to evaluate what felt good, and what felt terrible and why. Maybe you will come to know yourself and what you want more clearly from this- and find the motivation to pursue it in either direction.
5. Consider forgiving yourself.

I'm surprised how mean people have been. Although this is dcum. The PP seems to be the only one who is cleared eyed and not shaming her for getting married in her 20s or accusing her of needing to go to AA

[Anonymous]

Hi, this is OP. Certainly feel chastened by this thread. On one hand, it doesn't matter. But it was a peck on the lips, like a hello or goodbye kiss. I sort of shocked myself and then ran into a cab.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. You have confirmed you are still attractive.
2. Consider this event as a warning shot, and don't just brush it under the carpet.
3. Be a grown up and keep it to yourself. Don't tell anyone else who could use this information against you somehow- make you feel guilty, burden you with their opinions, judgement, or worse, want to revisit events with you over and over, and check up on you. This will make it very difficult to put behind you. This should be very private, not for all of your friends, mother, etc.
4. Take some time to evaluate what felt good, and what felt terrible and why. Maybe you will come to know yourself and what you want more clearly from this- and find the motivation to pursue it in either direction.
5. Consider forgiving yourself.

I'm surprised how mean people have been. Although this is dcum. The PP seems to be the only one who is cleared eyed and not shaming her for getting married in her 20s or accusing her of needing to go to AA

There is a whole contingency on here that have such a knee jerk reaction to people making pretty common mistakes. Just because it offends you to the core, doesn't make it pathological. If people don't cheat on their spouse, they do other terrible things to themselves or others. Many people cheat at some point, and regret it. She didn't have sex with the guy and come here gushing about how hot it was. All of the harpies on here have told their own lies, cheated elsewhere in life, and have their own regrets. Get some humanity, Duggar fans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. You have confirmed you are still attractive.
2. Consider this event as a warning shot, and don't just brush it under the carpet.
3. Be a grown up and keep it to yourself. Don't tell anyone else who could use this information against you somehow- make you feel guilty, burden you with their opinions, judgement, or worse, want to revisit events with you over and over, and check up on you. This will make it very difficult to put behind you. This should be very private, not for all of your friends, mother, etc.
4. Take some time to evaluate what felt good, and what felt terrible and why. Maybe you will come to know yourself and what you want more clearly from this- and find the motivation to pursue it in either direction.
5. Consider forgiving yourself.

I'm surprised how mean people have been. Although this is dcum. The PP seems to be the only one who is cleared eyed and not shaming her for getting married in her 20s or accusing her of needing to go to AA

There is a whole contingency on here that have such a knee jerk reaction to people making pretty common mistakes. Just because it offends you to the core, doesn't make it pathological. If people don't cheat on their spouse, they do other terrible things to themselves or others. Many people cheat at some point, and regret it. She didn't have sex with the guy and come here gushing about how hot it was. All of the harpies on here have told their own lies, cheated elsewhere in life, and have their own regrets. Get some humanity, Duggar fans.

I think I love you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is why you don't get married in your twenties.

Actually, this is why you continue to have a social life after the nuptials. A 30yo woman should still dress up and go out with friends on a regular. I'm 31 but most of my friends married in their 20s. Hanging out is no big thing and neither are flirtatious men, because its a regular thing. There isn't any temptation to indulge, because its NBD.

[Anonymous]

My god woman, pull yourself together! Isn't there episodes of Mad Men on Netflix?