Kissed someone, not my DH

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Wow, women really over-think things. You found another man attractive and gave into temptation in the most modest way imaginable. I wouldn't care if my DW did this, but I would be sort of pissed if she felt the need to tell me. Just bring the fantasy of this strange man into bed and rock your DH's world.

You're only looking at part of it. You ignore the part where she set herself up to fail before going out. That's quite a bit different than if she was just going about her daily routine when she found herself kissing another guy.

[Anonymous]

Hi there, I think it's hilarious that people think you got married so young. You were 26 when you got married, right? So was I. Now I am much, much older.

I don't think what happened is so terrible. But do think how you'd feel if the situation was reversed and your DH did what you did. Act accordingly.

And, if there are any issues in your marriage that might be fueling this--feeling distant, less sex, etc-- seek some counseling. It is SO much easier for counseling to work if it starts early. And even if there is no possibility of divorce, counseling can help so much in just making people closer. I speak from experience here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You got attached then married too young. It is human nature that you wonder about other guys.

This is exactly what I was thinking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here again. With a few days perspective, I don't feel bad, for the record. I mean, I feel bad in the sense that holy shit I need to check myself, but it was a fairly innocent face smack for myself to handle a few things that have been weighing on me. And for that, I am grateful. Part of it you all touched on--I have been w DH for a long time and sometimes, rarely, but sometimes the "what ifs" are there. I have also had a lot on my plate w some family stuff (illnesses) and just turning 30 which has left me contemplative and that paired with seeing an old friend from when I was 22 who is still pretty crazy and drinks too much and makes eyes at men at bars (she's single, go to town, friend). The whole thing was a recipe for just like--randomly leaning over and planting one on some guy! I mean even he was shocked.

Really my take away, after looking at it all, is not so much about my husband bc my god do I love that man. But it's my drinking. I am going to spend some more time reflecting on that aspect of it and how I am 30 and should not be getting carried away, even when it's fun in the midst of "adulting".

So that's about 230 words not only excusing but defending your shameful behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When's the last time you went all out with the lipstick and heels and such for your husband? I will hazard a guess and say it's been a while. Following that logic, you dolled up *without* him in the hopes of doing something (even if not sex) and you did. Seems we know what we need to know. Want a cookie?

WTH? I go all out with lipstick and heels daily. You don't make any damn sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again. With a few days perspective, I don't feel bad, for the record. I mean, I feel bad in the sense that holy shit I need to check myself, but it was a fairly innocent face smack for myself to handle a few things that have been weighing on me. And for that, I am grateful. Part of it you all touched on--I have been w DH for a long time and sometimes, rarely, but sometimes the "what ifs" are there. I have also had a lot on my plate w some family stuff (illnesses) and just turning 30 which has left me contemplative and that paired with seeing an old friend from when I was 22 who is still pretty crazy and drinks too much and makes eyes at men at bars (she's single, go to town, friend). The whole thing was a recipe for just like--randomly leaning over and planting one on some guy! I mean even he was shocked.

Really my take away, after looking at it all, is not so much about my husband bc my god do I love that man. But it's my drinking. I am going to spend some more time reflecting on that aspect of it and how I am 30 and should not be getting carried away, even when it's fun in the midst of "adulting".

So that's about 230 words not only excusing but defending your shameful behavior.[/quote

Example of talibanism. Shameful of tou to be judging others.

[Anonymous]

Are you kidding? She's a 30 y/o MARRIED woman who can't control herself and then rationalizes her behavior. I'm a 33 y/o married man and I don't go out and kiss other women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you kidding? She's a 30 y/o MARRIED woman who can't control herself and then rationalizes her behavior. I'm a 33 y/o married man and I don't go out and kiss other women.

Do you put on lipstick and heels before you go out?

[Anonymous]

NP here. I just found his thread when I came here to post a similar story. I was away with an old college friend and drank *way* too much. I ended up talking to someone too close, for too long, and being too flirtatious. We didn't kiss but if he had initiated I wouldn't have stopped him. My friend dragged me out of the bar, made me puke, and put me to bed. I'm grateful that nothing more happened. But I'm not going to lie. Getting attention from a stranger lit some sort of fire in me that I haven't felt since I was single. I came home and got all up on my husband and enjoyed a very sexy evening. I was reminded of when we first got together, young and drunk and having sex all the time. Being monogamous is one thing, but denying that you might have sexual feelings for anyone other than your spouse is foolish. I allow those feelings to fuel my desire for my own husband, and everyone wins.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you kidding? She's a 30 y/o MARRIED woman who can't control herself and then rationalizes her behavior. I'm a 33 y/o married man and I don't go out and kiss other women.

Mike Huckabee, should you really continue to post here now that you've announced your candidacy? Come now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again. With a few days perspective, I don't feel bad, for the record. I mean, I feel bad in the sense that holy shit I need to check myself, but it was a fairly innocent face smack for myself to handle a few things that have been weighing on me. And for that, I am grateful. Part of it you all touched on--I have been w DH for a long time and sometimes, rarely, but sometimes the "what ifs" are there. I have also had a lot on my plate w some family stuff (illnesses) and just turning 30 which has left me contemplative and that paired with seeing an old friend from when I was 22 who is still pretty crazy and drinks too much and makes eyes at men at bars (she's single, go to town, friend). The whole thing was a recipe for just like--randomly leaning over and planting one on some guy! I mean even he was shocked.

Really my take away, after looking at it all, is not so much about my husband bc my god do I love that man. But it's my drinking. I am going to spend some more time reflecting on that aspect of it and how I am 30 and should not be getting carried away, even when it's fun in the midst of "adulting".

So that's about 230 words not only excusing but defending your shameful behavior.

Don't forget to sew a big red A on her slutwear, I mean dress. These shameful hussies. Think of the children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here again. With a few days perspective, I don't feel bad, for the record. I mean, I feel bad in the sense that holy shit I need to check myself, but it was a fairly innocent face smack for myself to handle a few things that have been weighing on me. And for that, I am grateful. Part of it you all touched on--I have been w DH for a long time and sometimes, rarely, but sometimes the "what ifs" are there. I have also had a lot on my plate w some family stuff (illnesses) and just turning 30 which has left me contemplative and that paired with seeing an old friend from when I was 22 who is still pretty crazy and drinks too much and makes eyes at men at bars (she's single, go to town, friend). The whole thing was a recipe for just like--randomly leaning over and planting one on some guy! I mean even he was shocked.

Really my take away, after looking at it all, is not so much about my husband bc my god do I love that man. But it's my drinking. I am going to spend some more time reflecting on that aspect of it and how I am 30 and should not be getting carried away, even when it's fun in the midst of "adulting".

Unlike some I appreciate what you have shared here and I wish you will with your self exam and hope you find the answers you need.