'stranger danger', me?

[Anonymous]

You're not a stranger and they were wrong to label you one. They should have asked to borrow your phone to call home and say "Mom, I'm borrowing Olivia's mom's phone. The bus hasn't come and Olivia's mom offered to drive us to school. Do you want to talk to her?" and then you could have spoken to the mom and assured her you were not crazy or a pedophile.

In this country kids are not to go with an adult unless their parents have given their blessing.

[Anonymous]

Yep, and I think it's a good thing.

A number of years ago I was driving home in the rain and passed a neighbor girl walking home from school. I stopped and offered her a ride and she declined. Later that night, i realized that I shouldn't have offered and apologized to the mom next time I saw her.

Now a mother myself, I've told my daughter there are only two adults not family that she is allowed to get in the car with unless I've said otherwise in advance. Basically, the moms of her two best friends who also serve as our emergency contacts at her school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What part of the world are you from? If you are no white I don't think my kids would get in the car with you either.

What if the kids aren't white? Not everyone is you know.

[Anonymous]

The kids were correct not to go with you and you should not have pressured them. It would have been better to call their mother.

[Anonymous]

Better safe than sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What part of the world are you from? If you are no white I don't think my kids would get in the car with you either.

the hell

[Anonymous]

Idiot racist posting aside, the kids did absolutely the right thing--they should not get in anyone's car without parental permission regardless of the race of the person. BTW, whites are the most likely to abduct a kid and do all sorts of vile, twisted crimes, so.

[Anonymous]

Yes and you are DEFINITELY wrong to have pressured a kid in any way to go with you. What if a crazy molester comes driving along next and here you have worn down the kid's resolve? You may not be from this part of the world but you're here now and this is our reality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You're not a stranger and they were wrong to label you one. They should have asked to borrow your phone to call home and say "Mom, I'm borrowing Olivia's mom's phone. The bus hasn't come and Olivia's mom offered to drive us to school. Do you want to talk to her?" and then you could have spoken to the mom and assured her you were not crazy or a pedophile.

In this country kids are not to go with an adult unless their parents have given their blessing.

Yeah. no. That's a slippery slope for trickery with a shrewd sicko bent on taking a kid. You just do not get in the car PERIOD. No phone calls. No: "I left your mom a message". No faked phone conversations by the perp. Just DON'T.

[Anonymous]

I know on one hand they are protecting themselves, but this makes me sad. It reminds me of a time when a friend and I went to our girlfriends house when she was still at work and her 11-year-old answered the door. The girl knew who we were but had to get a "yes" from her mom by calling her before she would let us in. Admirable, because I know kids (especially girls) can't be too safe, but also makes me yearn for some kind of trust in our communities.

[Anonymous]

OP here.
I guess what shocked me is that I know these kids. They are not strangers to me. They are always at the bus stop, get under my umbrella when it is raining, they accept my apples in the afternoon, I even lent sock to that girl today because she wasn't wearing any in the snow, and I happened to have spare socks in my purse.

So I guess I felt more offended my the 'stranger' than by the 'danger'.

So I agree that no kid should get in a car without the parent approval.
However, from here to stranger danger, it is a long shot. They could just have said my mom needs to know, or whatever.
And then gone their own way.

No???

[Anonymous]

I agree it is odd. You have a house in their neighborhood, they're classmates with your kid.....what, you just happened to use this day to kidnap them? So beyond the realm of possibility. Especially because there were three of them.

[Anonymous]

Well Iv'e told my 4th grader to not go anywhere in a car with anyone, even if he knows the person, without my permission. So, the kids were just following directions probably.

Now my high schooler? I wouldnt have a problem with him making that call on his own, but not my 4th/5th grader.

[Anonymous]

I don't want my kids driving with just anyone in bad weather.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This morning after waiting for the bus 30 minutes in the snow with my 1st grader, I decided we were going to walk back home and drive to school, one mile away.
There were other kids at the bus stop, three of the older ones were there without parents. There were three kids I know, two brothers (5th and 4th grade) and a girl (5th grade) and I offered them a ride to school.
First they said yes. When we were walking, they started talking among themselves, and told me they would just go home and ask the brothers mom to drive them. We all knew that the mom was home with 2 toddlers, so I said that it was easier if they would just come with me. Then the older boy said to me 'stranger danger'.

I could have walked to the brothers house and talked to the mom and say 'look, the bus hasn't come, we are all frozen and have wet feet, I can drive your kids and the girl to school'. But it was two blocks away, and I didn't.

I am from another part of the world, where horrible things also happen, but I feel that people trust each other a bit more. I am interested in what you think of these kids judgement and the 'stranger danger' situation they felt given that:
- I see them every day
- I know the mom (we have not been to each other's houses, but we see each other every day)
- I know where they live
- I know where I live, 4 blocks from them
- They are 4th and 5th grade
- there were three of them
- I am a woman, and I was with my own son (somehow, I think these two are important too)
- the school is one mile away, no highway, 25 mile speed limit.

We all want our kids to be cautious, but is this the reaction and judgement that you would expect from your kid?
Thank

If you teach "stranger danger" then this the world you get. All adults are suspect. They don't know you. They did the right thing.