to the father who failed to correct his daughter at the playground yesterday...

[Anonymous]

Piling on with a

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So your kid stole toys and then hit and HE's the bad parent? Your kid sounds absolutely awful.

My toddler was being a toddler. Just like that little girl was doing what was developmentally appropriate. But the father should have corrected her. I don't blame the child, I blame the father.

And toddler's don't "steal." What is wrong with you??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where are these playgrounds that have community toys?

Friendship (Turtle) Park in AU Park and a bunch of Capitol Hill parks (Marion (another Turtle), Stanton, etc) all have shared toys.

You can label me all you want but I agree with OP - if your kid behaves inappropriately and you don't correct them, I don't care (though I will silently judge you), but if your kid behaves inappropriately, you don't correct them AND they are being inappropriate with my kid, I will correct them if you won't. You are a parent, do your job!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you know the 4/5 year old is not autistic or has some other impairment? Perhaps the father should explain that to you rather than let it go on, but it could explain why he didn't do what you expect (and sound like you expect major kudos for btw).

This. We bring our own toys. They are not community and I do not allow sharing as I am tired of them getting broken. My 4 year old will not play with your toddler. It is not our job to entertain your kid. Your kid should not be hitting anyone. The child may look fine but have speech, developmental or other issues.

Nor should the 4 year old be screaming in other children's faces. I'm teaching my kid not to hit. What is dad teaching his kid?

I don't expect a 4-year old to entertain my child, but they don't get a pass for screaming in my child's face.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So your kid stole toys and then hit and HE's the bad parent? Your kid sounds absolutely awful.

My toddler was being a toddler. Just like that little girl was doing what was developmentally appropriate. But the father should have corrected her. I don't blame the child, I blame the father.

And toddler's don't "steal." What is wrong with you??

Sure they do.

[Anonymous]

If I read correctly, your child tried to play with 4/5 yo's toys and when the kid didn't want to share, your child tried to hit the 4/5 yo. I have both a 3yo and 5yo. I would not have intervened in that situation. Your kid tried to hit my kid and you apologized. Not sure what you would have wanted me to do if I were the other parent.

My 3yo does not try to play with stranger's toys but it is WWII at our house because 3yo constantly tries to take 5yo's toys. I intervene all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Battle over toys at the playground among young children happens, and I suppose, is to be expected. However, I'm appalled that you sat there and did nothing when my toddler tried to engage with your 4/5 year old daughter, and her response was to scoop up all the toys and scream 'NOOOOO!' in my toddler's face. When my toddler reacted by swatting your child, I immediately intervened, got on your daughter's eye-level, apologized to her, made my toddler apologize, THEN left the scene to teach my toddler that hitting will not be tolerated, period.

Would you be a parent the next time and teach your daughter that all children are allowed to play with toys found at the playground, as this is community property, and screaming in another child's face is inappropriate?

Signed,

Annoyed Mom

My philosophy is that other people's behavior towards their children is not under my control. It's a very liberating philosophy. I recommend it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Nor should the 4 year old be screaming in other children's faces. I'm teaching my kid not to hit. What is dad teaching his kid?

I don't expect a 4-year old to entertain my child, but they don't get a pass for screaming in my child's face.

Dad is teaching his child that he's not going to intervene in her every playground interaction with another child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So your kid stole toys and then hit and HE's the bad parent? Your kid sounds absolutely awful.

My toddler was being a toddler. Just like that little girl was doing what was developmentally appropriate. But the father should have corrected her. I don't blame the child, I blame the father.

And toddler's don't "steal." What is wrong with you??

So, just clarifying-- did your toddler "engage" with the child by taking a toy? I'm assuming that as I type.

I'd actually be kinda-sorta on your side, and OF COURSE this is one way toddlers "engage," and I like kids to work this kind of thing out (moreso if they are the same age, which it sounds like they were not) blah blah blah. But a 4-5 yo doesn't "get" that your child is just "engaging" in an "age-appropriate" way and might react the way the 4-5 yo reacted.

Okay, you say you know the above and just blame the father.

But here's the rub-- you did correct the "age-appropriate" hitting, but you clearly think the age-appropriate taking is something not to be interfered-with. Something for the kids to work out themselves. Well, maybe the father thought the same of the screaming and taking-back. Like he doesn't intervene if there's no actual physical violence.

Different priorities, but not necessarily an "obviously" terrible parenting philosophy or one so different from your own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Nor should the 4 year old be screaming in other children's faces. I'm teaching my kid not to hit. What is dad teaching his kid?

I don't expect a 4-year old to entertain my child, but they don't get a pass for screaming in my child's face.

Dad is teaching his child that he's not going to intervene in her every playground interaction with another child.

And that natural consequences exist

[Anonymous]

"my toddler tried to engage with your 4/5 year old daughter"

What does "tried to engage with" even mean? Because if your toddler tried to take toys from my kid, and my kid scooped up the toys and yelled "no," I would absolutely not be disciplining my kid. And if your kid then hit my kid, I surely would expect you to step in.

[Anonymous]

You get a medal OP and the other parent gets the firing squad. All parents should hover within 6 inches of their kids in the sandbox at al times - anyone who fails to observe this rule should be banished from the park forever. And no child should ever have to be confronted with another child hogging toys. Ever. It's a moral outrage! I'm proud of your service in haranguing random strangers on the internet about this shocking incident.

BTW, you don't live in LA do you? Are you the same parent who got in a shoving match with a 2yo about a toy bin?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Battle over toys at the playground among young children happens, and I suppose, is to be expected. However, I'm appalled that you sat there and did nothing when my toddler tried to engage with your 4/5 year old daughter, and her response was to scoop up all the toys and scream 'NOOOOO!' in my toddler's face. When my toddler reacted by swatting your child, I immediately intervened, got on your daughter's eye-level, apologized to her, made my toddler apologize, THEN left the scene to teach my toddler that hitting will not be tolerated, period.

Would you be a parent the next time and teach your daughter that all children are allowed to play with toys found at the playground, as this is community property, and screaming in another child's face is inappropriate?

Signed,

Annoyed Mom

Not condoning the child's behavior but how do you know they weren't her toys?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So your kid stole toys and then hit and HE's the bad parent? Your kid sounds absolutely awful.

My toddler was being a toddler. Just like that little girl was doing what was developmentally appropriate. But the father should have corrected her. I don't blame the child, I blame the father.

And toddler's don't "steal." What is wrong with you??

So, just clarifying-- did your toddler "engage" with the child by taking a toy? I'm assuming that as I type.

I'd actually be kinda-sorta on your side, and OF COURSE this is one way toddlers "engage," and I like kids to work this kind of thing out (moreso if they are the same age, which it sounds like they were not) blah blah blah. But a 4-5 yo doesn't "get" that your child is just "engaging" in an "age-appropriate" way and might react the way the 4-5 yo reacted.

Okay, you say you know the above and just blame the father.

But here's the rub-- you did correct the "age-appropriate" hitting, but you clearly think the age-appropriate taking is something not to be interfered-with. Something for the kids to work out themselves. Well, maybe the father thought the same of the screaming and taking-back. Like he doesn't intervene if there's no actual physical violence.

Different priorities, but not necessarily an "obviously" terrible parenting philosophy or one so different from your own.

For all you know, the dad was pleased that his daughter stood up for herself without pushing or hitting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I read correctly, your child tried to play with 4/5 yo's toys and when the kid didn't want to share, your child tried to hit the 4/5 yo. I have both a 3yo and 5yo. I would not have intervened in that situation. Your kid tried to hit my kid and you apologized. Not sure what you would have wanted me to do if I were the other parent.

My 3yo does not try to play with stranger's toys but it is WWII at our house because 3yo constantly tries to take 5yo's toys. I intervene all the time.

No, you didn't read correctly. Those toys did not belong to the 4/5 year old. A bunch of children were playing in a sandbox that contained several toys, and my child happened to reach for the toy nearest the 4/5 year old's feet. Suddenly, the 4/5 year scooped up the toy, then screamed, 'NO!!" in my toddler's face. The father did nothing. IF they were her toys, how would anybody have known that? They were all scattered about.

The point is, screaming in other people's faces in inappropriate, and that behavior should've been corrected.