Do you think having sex on the same bed while 13mo child is sleeping consider child abused?

[Anonymous]

It is certainly much more likely to be uncomfortable or disturbing for the parents than for the baby who will most likely sleep through it and have no idea what they've seen if they do momentarily wake up.

[Anonymous]

I don't care whether or not it fits the legal definition, I think it's a mindfuck to have sex with someone non-participatory yet hasn't consented. AKA, a baby or child.

Yes, it's wrong even if they're asleep. DH and I have had sex in the bathroom while my baby sleeps in the hotel room, but we'd never have sex in the same room as our child no matter her age or state of wakefulness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Child abuse? I guess not.

Lacking in judgment and potentially pretty disturbing for even a 13mo who might wake up and see? Probably.

You over-estimate a 13mo's ability to comprehend what he/she is seeing.

Is there anything you think would be inappropriate for a 13 month old to see?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Child abuse? I guess not.

Lacking in judgment and potentially pretty disturbing for even a 13mo who might wake up and see? Probably.

You over-estimate a 13mo's ability to comprehend what he/she is seeing.

Therefore it's ok? Wow, you have a warped sense of right and wrong.

Yes, in the sense that I think it's reportable to CPS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Child abuse? I guess not.

Lacking in judgment and potentially pretty disturbing for even a 13mo who might wake up and see? Probably.

You over-estimate a 13mo's ability to comprehend what he/she is seeing.

That's pretty much the point. I don't think a 13 month old will think...wow, mom and dad are getting it on. Good for them! And roll back over.

Think about what two people look like while having sex and the noises they make. Depending on the situation and people involved, it can seem like someone is in pain or upset even when that's not the case at all. For example, a 13 month old could potentially see/hear their mother yelling or crying out. I think it could be confusing for a little kid, even one as young as 13 months.

[Anonymous]

I am the poster who called out the woman on the other thread for being a child abuser for having sex with her 13 mo in the bed.

First, I have no problem with people being naked in front of their children, etc.

However, why in the hell would ANYONE think this is appropriate behavior for parents. I do not care if your child is a newborn or 10 years old, its completely inappropriate.

I actually think the other woman was bragging about it. Like it was cool they did this. Exposing a child to a sexual act whether you are their parents or not is child abuse and I am horrified that I even stooped to the level of having to type this.

All time low for DCUM on this one.

And to the OP- obviously you know there is something wrong with this because you started a thread about it. Had I just been some "crazy lady" you would not think twice about this huh?

Anyone who can justify this is horrible. I am no prude and my sex life is perfect but I have no need to risk any exposure of it to my kids.

[Anonymous]

You seriously think that two parents having sex while their newborn is sleeping in the same room is child abuse? Ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Are you kidding?? What a stupid thing for someone to say. No, it's absolutely not child abuse. A kid that young isn't going to remember you having sex in front of them. This happens all the time in other countries where the family bed is the norm. That said, I personally would never do it. I do not cosleep, my DD has been in her crib in her own room since 4 mos old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You seriously think that two parents having sex while their newborn is sleeping in the same room is child abuse? Ridiculous.

That and perhaps you cannot read but its in the same bed.

[Anonymous]

I don't see any problem with it. The kids is not going to remember anything on the off chance they wake up.

[Anonymous]

Get real people. Before you all had 6000sf homes, generations have been living in one room huts. Parents have been fucking in front of sleeping kids for ages.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a job where I was a mandated reporter. I had a parent tell me that she had sex with her uncle (!) in a hotel bed, while her children sat in the floor at the end of the bed and watched television.

I called CPS. They laughed and told me to MYOB. It was perfectly fine as far as they were concerned.

I call bullshit. A 13 month old witnessing sex? I find it a creepy overstep on the part of the parents, but, no - the kid isn't going to process that like we would. But "children"? Older? Awake? Witnessing an incestuous hook up? And you claim that CPS had no problem with this? I get that they're overstretched, but I don't believe for one second they were fine with this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You seriously think that two parents having sex while their newborn is sleeping in the same room is child abuse? Ridiculous.

That and perhaps you cannot read but its in the same bed.

Makes no difference. You are an idiot and need to learn what real child abuse is so you can tell the difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get real people. Before you all had 6000sf homes, generations have been living in one room huts. Parents have been fucking in front of sleeping kids for ages.

I agree. I don't think it's ideal and that adults should be a discreet as possible, but the reality is that having ones private room to have sex in is the exception not the norm in most of the world. I am not saying it's ideal, but it's no sociopathic either.

[FruminousBandersnatch]

Anonymous wrote:I am the poster who called out the woman on the other thread for being a child abuser for having sex with her 13 mo in the bed.

First, I have no problem with people being naked in front of their children, etc.

However, why in the hell would ANYONE think this is appropriate behavior for parents. I do not care if your child is a newborn or 10 years old, its completely inappropriate.

I actually think the other woman was bragging about it. Like it was cool they did this. Exposing a child to a sexual act whether you are their parents or not is child abuse and I am horrified that I even stooped to the level of having to type this.

All time low for DCUM on this one.

And to the OP- obviously you know there is something wrong with this because you started a thread about it. Had I just been some "crazy lady" you would not think twice about this huh?

Anyone who can justify this is horrible. I am no prude and my sex life is perfect but I have no need to risk any exposure of it to my kids.

"I do not care if your child is a newborn or 10 years old, its completely inappropriate."

It must be lovely to live in such a black and white world. By your logic a movie that is rated PG-13 is ALWAYS inappropriate, regardless of the age of the child. The difference between having an infant sleeping next to you and having a 10-year old in the room is significant.

If the baby wakes up and sees mommy and daddy doing something under the covers in the dark, (a) the baby has no comprehension of what she's seeing, and (b) the baby has no real ability to form any memories about it. A 10-year old is completely different developmentally.

Obviously you're not going to have screaming, ride-em-cowgirl, kinda sex while a baby is sleeping, but having sex in a way that doesn't disturb the child is absolutely fine. The kid is sleeping and even if a 13-month old does wake up, you can stop what you're doing, comfort the baby until she goes back to sleep, and resume bonking, assuming the interruption hasn't killed the mood.

For someone who claims you're no prude, you sure come across as having a pretty repressed attitude, and using words like "Anyone who can justify this is horrible," tells me you've got some issues when it comes to sex.