Is There Anything You Wish You Asked Your DH/DW Before Marriage?

[Anonymous]

Nothing. We conducted full financial and medical due diligence as well as fully negotiated division of labor and responsibilities along with contingencies that cover most possible scenarios (including zombie apocalypse).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think I asked all the right questions but I was not smart enough to make conclusions from his answers and my observations.

This. A thousand times, this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing. We conducted full financial and medical due diligence as well as fully negotiated division of labor and responsibilities along with contingencies that cover most possible scenarios (including zombie apocalypse).

How romantic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing. We conducted full financial and medical due diligence as well as fully negotiated division of labor and responsibilities along with contingencies that cover most possible scenarios (including zombie apocalypse).

How romantic.

Thank you. We thrive on rules, regulations, procedures and processes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think I asked all the right questions but I was not smart enough to make conclusions from his answers and my observations.

This. A thousand times, this.

Me too. I believed the "rational explanations" given for the things I observed.

[Anonymous]

Is have asked if he had any special talents. Turns out he's a whiz at all these things I had no idea about. They're all good but I'm not a fan of surprises.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think I asked all the right questions but I was not smart enough to make conclusions from his answers and my observations.

Similar. I asked alot of the right questions but ignored the day to day observations that conflicted with our discussions. In hindsight there were signs I should have acknowledged. Also, earlier in the marriage once the discrepancy was out in the open if you will I should have called DW on it. I also sometimes wonder if alot of DW want to get married and wait until a ring is on their finger. I know the DWs here will flame me but I believe it is true. Young girls grow up playing with dolls and talking about husband and wife and their wedding. I think we program them unfairly and they are driven to catch a mate. I married in mid/late twenties. Should have waited to be more mature and probably should have had more relationships. So that I knew when to call bullshit on certain behaviors. Water over the dam at this point...

[Anonymous]

What's your definition of a "finished job"? What does it mean to you to say a project is complete? Have you paid your taxes consistently for 5 years or more? What's your credit score? How attached are you to your parents? Can you disagree with them on issues involving anything besides current events?

[Anonymous]

Where do you want to retire?

[Anonymous]

If I knew everything I wouldn't have gotten married. However, I'm glad I did. I enjoy our life together and love him.

[Anonymous]

Can you disagree with your parents? - that is a worthwhile question. I wish I knew more about his family dynamics. His family treats him like crap, he can't do enough for them. I am stumped.

[Anonymous]

Relationships with parents seem to be a common theme here... I wonder if they're not explored enough when dating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Relationships with parents seem to be a common theme here... I wonder if they're not explored enough when dating.

It's that's the parents behave because they want their child to marry. Then that's crossed off the list, they can brag to their friends and all hell breaks loose.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing. We conducted full financial and medical due diligence as well as fully negotiated division of labor and responsibilities along with contingencies that cover most possible scenarios (including zombie apocalypse).

What's your zombie plan!?!?

[Anonymous]

I would have asked if you have to live in your hometown because your mother lives here for the rest of your freaking life. Guess what, in three years you can live with her while I get out of here.