16-Year Age Difference -- The "Magic" Number for Relationships

[Anonymous]

More anecdotal evidence: my dad remarried a 39yo when he was 55 and they've been together 20+ years. Hmmm...

[Anonymous]

That may work men in their 30s, 40s and maybe early 50s, but eventually the woman will be middle aged and the guy will just be old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As someone in a May-December marriage, I'd point out the obvious which is that age differences mean different things at different stages in life.

At 25, you probably thought nothing of dating a 29yr old. But would you let your 14yr old daughter date an 18yr old guy?

DH and I are 15yrs apart. Would have been creepy had I been 15 and he was 30, or if I were his 4yr old child bride when he was 19 it would be sick. In our 30s and 40s as independent, educated, accomplished professionals though, not a big deal.

Wait till you are 65 and he is 80. Then it will be a big deal again...

[Anonymous]

I'll dovetail into the unpopular views in these parts thread... Women with means and self esteem simply don't date men 16+ years their senior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'll dovetail into the unpopular views in these parts thread... Women with means and self esteem simply don't date men 16+ years their senior.

Exactly! There are exceptions here and there, but this is mostly true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll dovetail into the unpopular views in these parts thread... Women with means and self esteem simply don't date men 16+ years their senior.

Exactly! There are exceptions here and there, but this is mostly true.

Wrong. But nice job being so judgmental!

I'm the typical case OP posted about with a marriage so amazing and solid that people are jealous. It wasn't about money, I had my own. Plus my own property.

I don't feel an age difference at all. You can't create a perfect model of someone and think they won't work for you if they don't fit into certain parameters. People who do that end up alone. Or miserable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have noticed that the "perfect" age difference between men and women seems to be 16 years, the man being the older one. Whenever you hear about a man leaving his wife for a younger woman, the age difference always seems to be about 16 years -- I do not know why this is.

So under my theory, a man cannot start to date his "perfect" match until he is at least 35; and can no longer date a woman in her early 30s or younger once he is older than 48 years.

What is wrong with the woman being the older one?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:More anecdotal evidence: my dad remarried a 39yo when he was 55 and they've been together 20+ years. Hmmm...

Wow, that is a grand total of one data point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As someone in a May-December marriage, I'd point out the obvious which is that age differences mean different things at different stages in life.

At 25, you probably thought nothing of dating a 29yr old. But would you let your 14yr old daughter date an 18yr old guy?

DH and I are 15yrs apart. Would have been creepy had I been 15 and he was 30, or if I were his 4yr old child bride when he was 19 it would be sick. In our 30s and 40s as independent, educated, accomplished professionals though, not a big deal.

Replacement model?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have noticed that the "perfect" age difference between men and women seems to be 16 years, the man being the older one. Whenever you hear about a man leaving his wife for a younger woman, the age difference always seems to be about 16 years -- I do not know why this is.

So under my theory, a man cannot start to date his "perfect" match until he is at least 35; and can no longer date a woman in her early 30s or younger once he is older than 48 years.

What is wrong with the woman being the older one?

Nothing, if society permitted it. It's the Demi Moore complex. She tried it out and hats off to her, but she went a little cray cray when her ass started sliding down her thighs. Women are still judged, attraction wise, on looks vs. accomplishments. You can "buy" and keep a younger man, but not someone like Ashton K. Demi could still land any number of young males interested in her "offerings." But, women don't want men to use them for money. Women, for the most part, I think pursue a deeper connection when not pursuing your wallet.

[Anonymous]

Actually, I know several women who dated and married "younger" men, although the age differences vary from four to 10 years. The couples each met in their 30s/40s and all are Gen Xers. As the DJ said, "it's not much of a difference if you listen to the same music."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have noticed that the "perfect" age difference between men and women seems to be 16 years, the man being the older one. Whenever you hear about a man leaving his wife for a younger woman, the age difference always seems to be about 16 years -- I do not know why this is.

So under my theory, a man cannot start to date his "perfect" match until he is at least 35; and can no longer date a woman in her early 30s or younger once he is older than 48 years.

What is wrong with the woman being the older one?

Nothing, if society permitted it. It's the Demi Moore complex. She tried it out and hats off to her, but she went a little cray cray when her ass started sliding down her thighs. Women are still judged, attraction wise, on looks vs. accomplishments. You can "buy" and keep a younger man, but not someone like Ashton K. Demi could still land any number of young males interested in her "offerings." But, women don't want men to use them for money. Women, for the most part, I think pursue a deeper connection when not pursuing your wallet.

Are you thus implying that men don't mind the corollary: that younger women would use them for money? Frankly, there does seem to be at least a coincidence. Really, how many poor old men do you see paired up with their daughters' peers?

[Anonymous]

Hey, cool. My husband is 16 years older than me. Works for us.

And yes I know one day he will be so old and gross and I'll be minorly less old and gross so it will TOTALLY SUCK. This is repeated as nauseum in these threads so you don't have to remind me!

[Anonymous]

There is a couple that I know she is 38 max and he just turned 70. Yep and they seem happy. Although I think she married him for the $$. He was a big time lawyer.

[Anonymous]

Age is just a number to me.

Instead of focusing on biological age, I think people should factor emotional maturity and character instead.