Secret of Jewish parenting

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I thought they were good with money

Yes, that's true, although not surprising, since we control the world financial system.

(Good grief.)

[Anonymous]

Teach them to grade grub and make up a learning disability to get them extra time on tests. That's how most of the Jewish people at my law school seemed to have been succeeding for years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I read "The blessing of a skinned knee". The author, a Jewish psychotherapist, has 2 daughters and they didn't seem to do anything extraordinary at home - they went to school, playdates, had one music lesson a week and some tutoring.

True, but when you are surrounded by achievers, achieving becomes the norm, not an exception or something praise worthy. Jews are extremely resilient people who do not make excuses for failure. Heck 6+Million were exterminated, wiping out whole families and they carry on, hardly looking back. Never in history will you see a more beaten down people who just pick them selves back up, dust off, and carry on with success.

Same reason a WASP family would not praise their kid for graduating high school. It is a complete expectation. Most Jews just take it up a notch. We also have tight communities. Jews always help Jews first. My experience in business is that being Jewish has given me the ability to cut in line, just due to my last name.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

True, but when you are surrounded by achievers, achieving becomes the norm, not an exception or something praise worthy. Jews are extremely resilient people who do not make excuses for failure. Heck 6+Million were exterminated, wiping out whole families and they carry on, hardly looking back. Never in history will you see a more beaten down people who just pick them selves back up, dust off, and carry on with success.

Same reason a WASP family would not praise their kid for graduating high school. It is a complete expectation. Most Jews just take it up a notch. We also have tight communities. Jews always help Jews first. My experience in business is that being Jewish has given me the ability to cut in line, just due to my last name.

PP, you're not actually helping.

[Anonymous]

Ask CindyBindy she knows everything

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I read "The blessing of a skinned knee". The author, a Jewish psychotherapist, has 2 daughters and they didn't seem to do anything extraordinary at home - they went to school, playdates, had one music lesson a week and some tutoring.

True, but when you are surrounded by achievers, achieving becomes the norm, not an exception or something praise worthy. Jews are extremely resilient people who do not make excuses for failure. Heck 6+Million were exterminated, wiping out whole families and they carry on, hardly looking back. Never in history will you see a more beaten down people who just pick them selves back up, dust off, and carry on with success.

Same reason a WASP family would not praise their kid for graduating high school. It is a complete expectation. Most Jews just take it up a notch. We also have tight communities. Jews always help Jews first. My experience in business is that being Jewish has given me the ability to cut in line, just due to my last name.

This is my experience as a non-Jew. I saw Jews promoted over non-Jews at my old very large law firm time and time again, and the people being promoted were obviously much less qualified. This actually was the case at 2 different law firms I worked at in NY and DC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jews always help Jews first. My experience in business is that being Jewish has given me the ability to cut in line, just due to my last name.

Do Jews discriminate among themselves, i.e. do you treat converted Jews differently than born from Jewish mothers? Or prefer Israeli Jews to Jews from Eastern Europe?

Just curious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Social pressure and growing up in families and societies who expect excellence go a long way.

This. And paying for college where possible. I knew that my parents would pay for a reasonable college and a reasonable major (not basket weaving somewhere random). And I am very grateful and will do te same for my kids. Also, there was little praise for trying only for results (not necessarily top results but good ones). However if there were real problems help was given either with them helping directly to learn a a concept or getting tutoring etc.

+1

[Anonymous]

And there is a strong sense of community so we help one another. This ranges from hosting college students for dinner, assisting during hardships, to helping peers acquire employment

[Anonymous]

The truth is, most developed countries in this world (as well as high-achieving and educated strata of developing countries) expect more of their kids and are less fearful of destroying their self-esteem than Americans.

I have experience with Japanese and Vietnamese families. Most of the ones I know, including my ILs, drill their children into academic perfection and the odd bad grade (an A- ?) shames the whole family. Most of the time, it works. My nephews and nieces, already at or headed for the top universities, have iron determination and great confidence. When it does not work, however, the poor kid suffers a great deal. I know of 2 cases.

Since I have SN as well as typical children, I think that you really have to gauge your children and have them reach for the most they can realistically strive for. It's not a one size fits all. They are all at least a grade ahead in math and reading, and excel in music. I had them drill mental math every day this summer to give them confidence to explore more wordy problems in class without wasting time calculating.

What they choose to do with their work ethic and their skills as adults, however, is up to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How many Jews do you know? All lawyers and doctors? Are you insane?

Yeah, pretty much. My Jewish gf and I were joking about this recently. She is conservative and moved to this area so the kids could grow up in a conservative Jewish community from NYC! I'm not Jewish but married to one (non-practicing) but relate well b/c we share a similar background and outlook. I'm Asian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:. Most of the ones I know, including my ILs, drill their children into academic perfection and the odd bad grade (an A- ?) shames the whole family.

Are you saying Jewish parents are Tiger Moms?

How do you drill them into perfection? I can't make my 4 year old sit down and trace letters for 5 minutes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So what's the secret of Jewish parenting? How do you raise such successful children that excel academically and later in careers?

Please do, share.

Just think, if you convert, your children will be successful, too! After all, all it takes is being Jewish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The truth is, most developed countries in this world (as well as high-achieving and educated strata of developing countries) expect more of their kids and are less fearful of destroying their self-esteem than Americans.

I have experience with Japanese and Vietnamese families. Most of the ones I know, including my ILs, drill their children into academic perfection and the odd bad grade (an A- ?) shames the whole family. Most of the time, it works. My nephews and nieces, already at or headed for the top universities, have iron determination and great confidence. When it does not work, however, the poor kid suffers a great deal. I know of 2 cases.

Since I have SN as well as typical children, I think that you really have to gauge your children and have them reach for the most they can realistically strive for. It's not a one size fits all. They are all at least a grade ahead in math and reading, and excel in music. I had them drill mental math every day this summer to give them confidence to explore more wordy problems in class without wasting time calculating.

What they choose to do with their work ethic and their skills as adults, however, is up to them.

As a Jew, I would like to say that I'm proud of our achievement as a people, but I know in my family and friends there is far too much anorexia and anxiety disorders. Perfection sometimes wears very hard on people who are more fragile.

Hell, my cousin nearly killed herself with Anorexia, but she managed valedictorian of her elite private HS, full ride at Stanford, Double Major 4.0, and picked up an awesome job and is now working on her MBA from Georgetown. She is a mental mess, but outwardly the perfect jewish girl, doing all the right things. She just married a super overachieving Jewish boy. They are rolling in prosperity. If her fertility is not wrecked from being 90lbs of skin and bones so long maybe she will have genius Jewish kids.

[Anonymous]

haredi jews are not like this.

btw, what do jews think of ryan braun?

has he brought shame to the tribe or is it the fault of the goyim?