Question for the rich, skinny moms who post judgy remarks about someone's looks/attire on here

[Anonymous]

I have a comfortable income and am thin. I don't post judgy remarks about people's looks/attire. Perhaps this post does not fully apply to me but I'll offer the following comments.

If you watch the show "What Not To Wear," Clinton/Stacy never tell anyone to lose weight. They try to get people to wear clothing that is size appropriate and flattering to their body type no matter what the size of the week's guest. Everyone has a body type and figure, no matter how overweight. Pear shape, round, square, whatever. Dress to that type. For instance, they point out that capri pants shorten the body and do not flatter. Loud prints and blaring colors similarly are not flattering; neither is an all-black palette.

Work with what you have. Dress with taste and with confidence. And judgy women are never in style and no one on DCUM likes their obnoxious posts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a question that I really want the truthful answer. If I asked IRL, I'd probably get a very nice polite answer. So, here goes:

I am overweight. I am not rich. I have cankles and nobby-knees. and I'm old.

I am trying to lose weight, but of course it takes time (I've lost 15lbs so far, but I'm only losing about a lb a week, and I'm still fat). I like the look of nice things, but can't afford them. But, if I see a purse with the LV logo, or a coach-type purse at Marshalls I'll get it because I think it's pretty - certainly not to pretend I have something I don't. I have also been wearing sleevless or short sleeves. I'm usually conservative (I never wear shorts or shorter skirts - always capris or capri-length skirts) but it's so dang hot outside, it's hard to find cool tops with sleeves that go to your elbow.

So, my question is, when you see me on the metro, or walking on the street or in the elevator with my fat arms exposed, fake LV or coach purse and non-designer capri pants, do you really think the things you say here on DCUM? I really just thought of myself as a non-event. I really thought that the skinny-rich-designer women just don't even notice or care that I walked by (or are in the elevator). I am genuinely curious. Do you spend minutes (or seconds) or whatever really having a judgy thought about me or am I a non-issue IRL and the judgy stuff just comes out when the topic of exposed fat arms, fake designers, or cheap dress comes up. then you give it some thought and respond truthfully?

I think all women are beautiful in their own way. Why do you even care about what some DCUM woman thinks? Just because someone is wealthy or Ivy League doesn't make their opinion count any more than someone else.

Says the woman from Podunk Community College rockin' the Dress Barn maxi...

Says the egotistical, conceited woman whose DH probably screws around on her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a comfortable income and am thin. I don't post judgy remarks about people's looks/attire. Perhaps this post does not fully apply to me but I'll offer the following comments.

If you watch the show "What Not To Wear," Clinton/Stacy never tell anyone to lose weight. They try to get people to wear clothing that is size appropriate and flattering to their body type no matter what the size of the week's guest. Everyone has a body type and figure, no matter how overweight. Pear shape, round, square, whatever. Dress to that type. For instance, they point out that capri pants shorten the body and do not flatter. Loud prints and blaring colors similarly are not flattering; neither is an all-black palette.

Work with what you have. Dress with taste and with confidence. And judgy women are never in style and no one on DCUM likes their obnoxious posts.

Agree about WNTW suggestions. I often wonder, though, whether the people on the show lose weight after they see how great they look and gain a little confidence from it. I wish they would do more follow up!

[Anonymous]

Okay I will bite. I am probably the typical person you are talking about. In the case of total strangers, it really depends on what else I am thinking about at the time. If by chance I know the particularly unattractive person is nasty themselves, then yes I think "how did she get to be like that". For instance, I wonder was her mother frumpy dumpy? I know I would up thin and concerned about my appearance from my mother. I must point out I spend less then 5 min getting dressed (so my children aren't being neglected bc I chose to worry about my appearance).

I know this in a grammatically incorrect ramble, sorry!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do all the put-together thin women do for a living?

I ask because in my experience, the really brainy women (and men) do not make fashion a priority. I mean nerdy brainy. Scientists, accountants, policy wonks in the back rooms crunching numbers, etc.

I work in education. I am in a lot of meetings, so I have to be put together. I try to be a role model for the female students (you don't have to dress trashy to get attention), and I am more respected by parents. I hate to say it, but I sometimes judge the work ethic of others based on appearance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a question that I really want the truthful answer. If I asked IRL, I'd probably get a very nice polite answer. So, here goes:

I am overweight. I am not rich. I have cankles and nobby-knees. and I'm old.

I am trying to lose weight, but of course it takes time (I've lost 15lbs so far, but I'm only losing about a lb a week, and I'm still fat). I like the look of nice things, but can't afford them. But, if I see a purse with the LV logo, or a coach-type purse at Marshalls I'll get it because I think it's pretty - certainly not to pretend I have something I don't. I have also been wearing sleevless or short sleeves. I'm usually conservative (I never wear shorts or shorter skirts - always capris or capri-length skirts) but it's so dang hot outside, it's hard to find cool tops with sleeves that go to your elbow.

So, my question is, when you see me on the metro, or walking on the street or in the elevator with my fat arms exposed, fake LV or coach purse and non-designer capri pants, do you really think the things you say here on DCUM? I really just thought of myself as a non-event. I really thought that the skinny-rich-designer women just don't even notice or care that I walked by (or are in the elevator). I am genuinely curious. Do you spend minutes (or seconds) or whatever really having a judgy thought about me or am I a non-issue IRL and the judgy stuff just comes out when the topic of exposed fat arms, fake designers, or cheap dress comes up. then you give it some thought and respond truthfully?

I think all women are beautiful in their own way. Why do you even care about what some DCUM woman thinks? Just because someone is wealthy or Ivy League doesn't make their opinion count any more than someone else.

Says the woman from Podunk Community College rockin' the Dress Barn maxi...

Says the egotistical, conceited woman whose DH probably screws around on her.

Oooohhh, I see PP touched a nerve!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do all the put-together thin women do for a living?

I ask because in my experience, the really brainy women (and men) do not make fashion a priority. I mean nerdy brainy. Scientists, accountants, policy wonks in the back rooms crunching numbers, etc.

Academic here, and I definitely don't make fashion a priority. I am very mindful of fitness and staying "thin", though. When I see someone very fashionable, I'll admire her style, but if someone looks "average" I don't really give it a second thought.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I saw what you just described, I would think that you are a laid back mom who probably takes care of her family first, and herself second.

I agree with pp, I am usually more worried about myself than what you look like. Actually, you are describing the typical 40 plus female. So you would not be considered some type of freak show if that is what you are worried about. Isn't the average sized woman in America 14 or 16?

I think this is an excuse for staying fat. I take care of my family and myself. I'm thin, somewhat fashionable, and very, very nerdy. And no, I don't have domestic help. Your children look up to you as an example. I eat relatively well and so do my kids. We go to the park and frequently take walks together. Don't assume that a thin women is always at the gym while her nanny takes care of the kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I saw what you just described, I would think that you are a laid back mom who probably takes care of her family first, and herself second.

I agree with pp, I am usually more worried about myself than what you look like. Actually, you are describing the typical 40 plus female. So you would not be considered some type of freak show if that is what you are worried about. Isn't the average sized woman in America 14 or 16?

I think this is an excuse for staying fat. I take care of my family and myself. I'm thin, somewhat fashionable, and very, very nerdy. And no, I don't have domestic help. Your children look up to you as an example. I eat relatively well and so do my kids. We go to the park and frequently take walks together. Don't assume that a thin women is always at the gym while her nanny takes care of the kids.

I don't thnk PP was saying that at all. How can you be a parent and be entirely unfamiliar with the idea that many women wholly subsume themselves to their childrens' lives? Is this news to you? It's not something I find defensible, but to be unaware of it? That's as naive as coming on DCUM, starting a BF post and expecting it to stay friendly.

[Anonymous]

NP here. The thin/fat thing is really interesting to me. I have been thin my whole life, skinny in fact, never dieted, never "worked out" although I am active and played sports in school. Now I am 40+ and a teeny bit bigger, about 125 lbs (I'm 5'6"). I used to think heavy people were that way b/c they ate too much, but after all these years, and reading about the subject, I think we have a lot less control over our weight than we'd like to believe. Some people are just bigger.

So I do not judge people by their weight. I will admit to having a strong dislike for when women wear big baggy t-shirts, especially if they have something written on them. Please stop dressing like a teenaged boy! Dress like a woman.

[Anonymous]

Fat is fat. I can tell if you work out or if you're just ordering that salad at chillis to pretend you're on a diet. Then again why am I at chillis watching you? Gross

[Anonymous]

Hi OP, I would never judge someone for being overweight. I honestly probably wouldn
't notice you and certainly would not be able to identify that your purse was a fake. I don't post snarky comments on this site about someone's appearance, but I can't imagine anyone in real life is thinking such things. Unless they are 12.

[Anonymous]

I am skinny and well off. I wear Valentino and forever 21 I shop at neimans and marshalls. I think it's great you are trying to loose weight and understand but nutrition and healthy lifestyle choices are important to me so invsome ways yes, I do judge you but only to the extent that its a, "I hope she is making the right choices for her health" way not a "lazy fat person" way. As for the fake bags, I judge you and everyone one else who has them. I hate them. I wouldnt buy a real one just because odds are people would think it was fake. I hate the fake stuff. Hate it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I saw what you just described, I would think that you are a laid back mom who probably takes care of her family first, and herself second.

I agree with pp, I am usually more worried about myself than what you look like. Actually, you are describing the typical 40 plus female. So you would not be considered some type of freak show if that is what you are worried about. Isn't the average sized woman in America 14 or 16?

I think this is an excuse for staying fat. I take care of my family and myself. I'm thin, somewhat fashionable, and very, very nerdy. And no, I don't have domestic help. Your children look up to you as an example. I eat relatively well and so do my kids. We go to the park and frequently take walks together. Don't assume that a thin women is always at the gym while her nanny takes care of the kids.

I don't thnk PP was saying that at all. How can you be a parent and be entirely unfamiliar with the idea that many women wholly subsume themselves to their childrens' lives? Is this news to you? It's not something I find defensible, but to be unaware of it? That's as naive as coming on DCUM, starting a BF post and expecting it to stay friendly.

Are you the know it all who seems to post on every thread?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I saw what you just described, I would think that you are a laid back mom who probably takes care of her family first, and herself second.

I agree with pp, I am usually more worried about myself than what you look like. Actually, you are describing the typical 40 plus female. So you would not be considered some type of freak show if that is what you are worried about. Isn't the average sized woman in America 14 or 16?

I think this is an excuse for staying fat. I take care of my family and myself. I'm thin, somewhat fashionable, and very, very nerdy. And no, I don't have domestic help. Your children look up to you as an example. I eat relatively well and so do my kids. We go to the park and frequently take walks together. Don't assume that a thin women is always at the gym while her nanny takes care of the kids.

I don't thnk PP was saying that at all. How can you be a parent and be entirely unfamiliar with the idea that many women wholly subsume themselves to their childrens' lives? Is this news to you? It's not something I find defensible, but to be unaware of it? That's as naive as coming on DCUM, starting a BF post and expecting it to stay friendly.

Are you the know it all who seems to post on every thread?

And are you by chance, the OP?