Do healthy, masculine men still exist?

[Anonymous]

Can someone define masculine man? I can't change a lightbulb and don't ask me to change a tire. But I could probably solve a partial differential equation in my head. I know how to make money and I have more than we will ever need for the next 40+ years. I just need to kiss my wife and when i touch her p**y she is already wet.

Is a masculine man a man who can change a tire, deadlift 325 lbs? Definition please

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't find this at all, not my spouse, his colleagues, my friends, my kid's friends' dads. Most men are just normal guys. I'm wondering what your definitions are here.

+1. I know a lot of guys I wouldn't necessarily deem "super masculine" in some stereotypical body builder way, but I don't know ANY straight men I consider "feminine" in the slightest. Most are just normal guys and I think many are good examples of healthy masculinity.

What is a "feminine" man to you, OP? Is that a term you are using as an insult? Look inside yourself.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like a question RFK Jr would ask.

[Anonymous]

Is there some MAGA bot posting these inane questions?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, my DH is one of those. I consider his emotional and intellectual intelligence extremely masculine. He is measured and kind, but also would not hesitate to protect his family if the need arose.

DH is same.

He rescued elderly neighbor from a fire. Outwardly I hated him for him, on the inside I thought it was masculine, sexy, caring and I loved him for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It seems that everything is on one side of the spectrum or the other - either more feminine men or toxic masculine men. Very little to find in the middle.

You are looking for a college educated, perhaps even masters educated *officer* in the armed services active duty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't find this at all, not my spouse, his colleagues, my friends, my kid's friends' dads. Most men are just normal guys. I'm wondering what your definitions are here.

+1. I know a lot of guys I wouldn't necessarily deem "super masculine" in some stereotypical body builder way, but I don't know ANY straight men I consider "feminine" in the slightest. Most are just normal guys and I think many are good examples of healthy masculinity.

What is a "feminine" man to you, OP? Is that a term you are using as an insult? Look inside yourself.

I'm thinking OP might think my husband is "feminine" because he splits laundry and cooking with me.

Of course that's pretty much all the Dads I know. Most Dads don't feel their masculinity is threatened by being a partner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't find this at all, not my spouse, his colleagues, my friends, my kid's friends' dads. Most men are just normal guys. I'm wondering what your definitions are here.

+1. I know a lot of guys I wouldn't necessarily deem "super masculine" in some stereotypical body builder way, but I don't know ANY straight men I consider "feminine" in the slightest. Most are just normal guys and I think many are good examples of healthy masculinity.

What is a "feminine" man to you, OP? Is that a term you are using as an insult? Look inside yourself.

I'm thinking OP might think my husband is "feminine" because he splits laundry and cooking with me.

Of course that's pretty much all the Dads I know. Most Dads don't feel their masculinity is threatened by being a partner.

Exactly. We are partners and I find it extremely attractive that he wanted an equal partner is life and not some damsel in distress he needed to provide for and take care of. Now, should something happen to me (or him) we would take care of each other, of course.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems that everything is on one side of the spectrum or the other - either more feminine men or toxic masculine men. Very little to find in the middle.

You are looking for a college educated, perhaps even masters educated *officer* in the armed services active duty.

My Dad was a long term officer and most of the officers I knew growing up (and now) are again, normal guys. The masculine obsession tends to be a boot thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems that everything is on one side of the spectrum or the other - either more feminine men or toxic masculine men. Very little to find in the middle.

You are looking for a college educated, perhaps even masters educated *officer* in the armed services active duty.

My Dad was a long term officer and most of the officers I knew growing up (and now) are again, normal guys. The masculine obsession tends to be a boot thing.

What does boot thing mean for the uninitiated?

[Anonymous]

Yep! Most are married though. Dh is a gentleman in public and masculine in bed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems that everything is on one side of the spectrum or the other - either more feminine men or toxic masculine men. Very little to find in the middle.

You are looking for a college educated, perhaps even masters educated *officer* in the armed services active duty.

My Dad was a long term officer and most of the officers I knew growing up (and now) are again, normal guys. The masculine obsession tends to be a boot thing.

What does boot thing mean for the uninitiated?

A try hard, usually enlisted guy who brings up being in the military constantly. Like my brother in law who won't shut up about being a marine, despite washing out in 2 years. Always trying to get discounts at restaurants, that kind of thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't find this at all, not my spouse, his colleagues, my friends, my kid's friends' dads. Most men are just normal guys. I'm wondering what your definitions are here.

+1. I know a lot of guys I wouldn't necessarily deem "super masculine" in some stereotypical body builder way, but I don't know ANY straight men I consider "feminine" in the slightest. Most are just normal guys and I think many are good examples of healthy masculinity.

What is a "feminine" man to you, OP? Is that a term you are using as an insult? Look inside yourself.

I'm thinking OP might think my husband is "feminine" because he splits laundry and cooking with me.

Of course that's pretty much all the Dads I know. Most Dads don't feel their masculinity is threatened by being a partner.

My dh is super masculine- very athletic, electrical engineer who likes working with his hands, hunts, can fix anything. He’s our main cook. I can cook and think I’m a good cook, but he really enjoys it. Not sure why cooking is feminine? He sews too!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can someone define masculine man? I can't change a lightbulb and don't ask me to change a tire. But I could probably solve a partial differential equation in my head. I know how to make money and I have more than we will ever need for the next 40+ years. I just need to kiss my wife and when i touch her p**y she is already wet.

Is a masculine man a man who can change a tire, deadlift 325 lbs? Definition please

I think everyone has their own definition, but for me:
A man who shows sexual initiative, is capable with his hands around the house, holds space for my emotions, has opinions on our life direction, take initiative in doing things, and is relatively lean and strong (and a beard, strong hands and legs, and a deep voice doesn’t hurt). This is awesome when it’s paired with a man who can show emotional vulnerability, tenderness with children and me, and a desire to take care of those he loves. Not sure that guy exists.

[Anonymous]

Do loving, nurturing, supportive and feminine women still exist? Yes, both masculine men and feminine women exist, but you really have to have a strategy to find them. Since healthy masculinity is more of a subjective idea, your ideal level of masculinity will likely be beta to some and toxic to others, so a blueprint will not be universal. Find a man that has the traits you want and figure out how and where he was raised and where he spends his free time and go get yours. The biggest problem is not figuring out who is genuinely that man, but understanding how to treat him so he stays masculine for you.

Unfortunately, western society no longer creates either broadly because our social norms don’t value masculine men or feminine women. We prioritize the individual over family/community and immediate happy feelings over building long-term success through hardworking and sacrifices. In general, the men and women of today are only loyal to their feelings instead of loyal to their commitments, relationships and values.

It sucks for all of us.