Don't interview me!
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Anonymous
Have you done OLD? I have been married for nearly two decades but still shudder when I think of my OLD experience. It is a long, hard slog. People are rarely how they appear in their profiles -- and I am not talking about deliberate deception, though there is some of that, too, but just that it is so hard to get a sense of people from profiles. Anyway, just saying, i think OP just wants to vent because he is tired of the process. He was probably excited about this woman and thought they would be a good fit and then the date was terrible. It is not that deep. Just a vent. |
Anonymous
| I am the PP who just said OLD is a slog. Forgot to mention, I DID meet my husband on OLD. As well as another guy I dated for several months. But, I also had at least 20 meh first dates and 5 or 6 horrible first dates over two stints of OLD. Other than DH and the other boyfriend, no second dates. |
Anonymous
It’s not OLD’s fault, this is the majority of the population, male or female. Just keep swimming/fishing! |
Anonymous
Similar but I went on 100+ first dates, maybe 10 second dates and three relationships, one of which is DH. |
Anonymous
And a reason why do many men are single!! |
Anonymous
Yeah, I was thinking the same thing!! I've been told by a couple guys that our date felt like an interview and my response was that I know what I want and believe I shouldn't wast their time. The guys I said this to were totally on board with this idea. One I dated for a year and a half, the other 3 months. My husband never said this to me because he was in the same place - we got serious quickly, dated for 3 years, then married - that was 22 years ago. BTW we are both successful and driven people who know what we want out of life. I cannot be with someone who doesn't what they want. |
Anonymous
Nah, they are looking for compatibility |
Anonymous
What’s wrong with this? Should we not identify any red flags immediately? I’m very confused as to why you’re advocating for… not looking for red flags. Dating is dangerously for women. One wrong rejection and you could end up dead. If you cannot understand why women would want to get the basic red flags out of the way early, you should not be allowed around women. |
Anonymous
| Sounds like it was not a match. |
Anonymous
No, there won't, and the bolded is a bit part of why. Bro, the first date IS an interview! We've gotta suss out if your IRL persona aligns reasonably well enough with your OLD profile/persona, look for any obvious red flags, get a general sense of what you're looking for, and see if you're reasonably aligned with what we're looking for. What else is an interview, if not these "are you qualified for this position"-type questions? We're not there for you to share with. Get a therapist for that. The sort of guy who has a narrative agenda for a first date is a problem. He either wants an object, or someone who he can control, or a mommy/shrink he can talk at, not with. Go into a first date thinking it'll be awkward, commit to be honest with yourself and your date, and don't have any expectations beyond "i'm going to spend some time with a new person today". All of a sudden, it's way less intense and actually kinda fun. |
Anonymous
| OP wants a giggling hottie who will stroke his arm, tell him he’s super interesting, and put out asap. |
Anonymous
Don’t all men? |
Anonymous
| It's pretty clear OP needs social skills training. |
Anonymous
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Classic video for this thread:
https://www.reddit.com/r/TikTokCringe/comments/15nurj7/pov_youre_on_a_date_with_a_woman_in_her_30s/ |
Anonymous
| I know someone who sends a 100 question list to their matches. |