Don't interview me!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many singles are socially awkward. Most communication is nonverbal. She might smile, blush, sit next to you, or not. You need to manage the date. When this stuff happens, alarms should go off in your head. "Danger - prepare to abort!"

At this point, you can refuse to answer. Say "Let's play a game" and change the conversation or activity. Get more drinks, switch the seating arrangement, play "Marry, kill, f*ck." Don't tolerate disrespect or weirdness. In extreme cases, tell her "I'm not here to audition." Men do the asking, planning, and paying. You only have the power to walk. It sucks to shuffle your schedule, look presentable, and drive to the date. But if you don't end a decent percentage of online dates early, then you are probably doing something wrong.

Do you even like the people you date? Doesn’t seem like it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Women have a long list of requirements for a man to meet in order to be considered worthy.

There's a reason so many women are single.

This. ^

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Women have a long list of requirements for a man to meet in order to be considered worthy.

There's a reason so many women are single.

They are single because they aren’t settling for just any old fool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Women have a long list of requirements for a man to meet in order to be considered worthy.

There's a reason so many women are single.

Yes, and here it is: it's far better to be single than be partnered with a low-grade person who brings drama, strife, conflict and/or unhappiness to your life. Women screen for these things, and the screening gets more intense as the stakes get higher. A casual date who isn't expected to be more than a temporary good time may not have to meet the standards for a long-term partner or potential spouse.

Don't bullshit yourself about how this is a female thing because men do the same, though their criteria may be different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women have a long list of requirements for a man to meet in order to be considered worthy.

There's a reason so many women are single.

They are single because they aren’t settling for just any old fool.

It's wild that OP doesn't think he has to apply, like women should just be grateful to be in his presence or something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many singles are socially awkward. Most communication is nonverbal. She might smile, blush, sit next to you, or not. You need to manage the date. When this stuff happens, alarms should go off in your head. "Danger - prepare to abort!"

At this point, you can refuse to answer. Say "Let's play a game" and change the conversation or activity. Get more drinks, switch the seating arrangement, play "Marry, kill, f*ck." Don't tolerate disrespect or weirdness. In extreme cases, tell her "I'm not here to audition." Men do the asking, planning, and paying. You only have the power to walk. It sucks to shuffle your schedule, look presentable, and drive to the date. But if you don't end a decent percentage of online dates early, then you are probably doing something wrong.

A first date is literally an audition...for a second date...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women have a long list of requirements for a man to meet in order to be considered worthy.

There's a reason so many women are single.

I mean….would you prefer any person, man or woman, have zero requirements for who they want to partner with?

I guess for me, as a woman, I always knew I had to be outstanding. I learned how to make men feel comfortable, I learned how to massage their egos and tend to their domestic needs. I’m super good at it.

I don’t see the same kind of reciprocity or capability in the men I’ve been asked out by or gone on dates with.

I wonder if dating was just so easy for men, or if the prexumltion of sex was so taken for granted in the age of “if they’re drunk they asked for it” and casual date rape. I think men now are being called to either step up as a fully grown adult- capable of managing a well rounded life without a woman and capable of being an equal partner- or they turn bitter - like you.

+ 1 to this, unfortunately. I recently went on a terrible first date (OLD). The guy literally complained about everything, spent most of the date making pained/contorted faces when I asked him basic get-to-know-you questions, and asked me very little about myself. A total sour puss. I decide to give the guy 1 hour of my time since he was drinking his drink extremely slowly and I didn't want to be outright rude, so I made a little game of it for myself to see how well I could carry the conversation. Despite his terrible first-date skills, I keep the conversation moving, asked him a ton of questions about himself, acted sympathetically to his trauma dumping, and even cracked a few jokes. Once the time was up I quickly made an excuse about having to meet a friend and bailed. The next day I messaged him that we weren't a match but I wished him the best of luck. He wrote back that he was "very surprised" to hear that. He thought the date had gone extremely well and thought we had a lot in common and said it was rare to have that type of connection. His lack of awareness and interpretation of friendliness and good conversation skills as romantic chemistry was shocking to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women have a long list of requirements for a man to meet in order to be considered worthy.

There's a reason so many women are single.

They are single because they aren’t settling for just any old fool.

"I know what I got!"
"No low ball or scrubs!"

heh. Enjoy the cat lady lifestyle. After 30 a woman has very few choices unless she dates 50+ year old men.