Would it matter to you if your child dated someone of a different background?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:different race or ethnicity? wouldn't bother me a bit.

but, i must admit i wouldn't be thrilled if our dds dated/married super religious/conservative people. (or a republican)

You just made me vomit in my mouth a little.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:different race or ethnicity? wouldn't bother me a bit.

but, i must admit i wouldn't be thrilled if our dds dated/married super religious/conservative people. (or a republican)

I'm with you on that one. I would care way more if DD dated/married someone who was super religious or conservative than what race/ethnicity that person was. . .

[Anonymous]

what about socioeconomic group? does that matter?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:different race or ethnicity? wouldn't bother me a bit.

but, i must admit i wouldn't be thrilled if our dds dated/married super religious/conservative people. (or a republican)

I would be VERY disappointed - specially if he was super religious....

[Anonymous]

Would it be ok if DDs dated/married a very religious person who was a member of a progressive religion respectful of women and women's rights?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:what about socioeconomic group? does that matter?

Yes, I would be very concerned if either of my kids married someone from the proverbial "wrong side of the tracks" especially DD because I think lower middle working class men treat women differently, less respecfully,less as fully capable and thinking. I would greatly prefer eithre child marry a person from a similar soci-economic status as they grew up in. I would not care about skin color or ethnicity. I might have a small problem with any non-christian religion or overly conservative religion but that would depend on the spouses' expectations for kids and family events..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:what about socioeconomic group? does that matter?

Yes, I would be very concerned if either of my kids married someone from the proverbial "wrong side of the tracks" especially DD because I think lower middle working class men treat women differently, less respecfully,less as fully capable and thinking. I would greatly prefer eithre child marry a person from a similar soci-economic status as they grew up in. I would not care about skin color or ethnicity. I might have a small problem with any non-christian religion or overly conservative religion but that would depend on the spouses' expectations for kids and family events..

This is my view too, for my red-haired, freckled sons.

[Anonymous]

Purple, green, straight, gay whatever--so long as DS and partner treat each other well.

I'm in a mixed race marriage, and both families have been accepting.

22:03 and 22:06: We were both born "on the wrong side of the tracks," so to speak, but our working class parents sacrificed to send us to good schools, and we both have graduate degrees from Ivies. Personally, I would care more about what a person does with her life than if she grew up poor (or course, I'm biased). I have bright, talented classmates who with their trust funds are basically doing nothing with their lives.

[Anonymous]

It would depend on what that different background is.

[Anonymous]

What about a reformed convict?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:what about socioeconomic group? does that matter?

Yes, I would be very concerned if either of my kids married someone from the proverbial "wrong side of the tracks" especially DD because I think lower middle working class men treat women differently, less respecfully,less as fully capable and thinking. I would greatly prefer eithre child marry a person from a similar soci-economic status as they grew up in. I would not care about skin color or ethnicity. I might have a small problem with any non-christian religion or overly conservative religion but that would depend on the spouses' expectations for kids and family events..

Dear, if you have a "small problem" with someone of a non-Christian religion (Jewish, Muslim, Taoist) then you have a problem with someone of a different ethnicity from your child. Be honest and say that it would matter to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:what about socioeconomic group? does that matter?

Yes, I would be very concerned if either of my kids married someone from the proverbial "wrong side of the tracks" especially DD because I think lower middle working class men treat women differently, less respecfully,less as fully capable and thinking. I would greatly prefer eithre child marry a person from a similar soci-economic status as they grew up in. I would not care about skin color or ethnicity. I might have a small problem with any non-christian religion or overly conservative religion but that would depend on the spouses' expectations for kids and family events..

I agree, except I wouldn't mind the non-christian religion as long as it's not extreme and would also "depend on the spouses' expectations for kids and family events.."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Purple, green, straight, gay whatever--so long as DS and partner treat each other well.

I'm in a mixed race marriage, and both families have been accepting.

22:03 and 22:06: We were both born "on the wrong side of the tracks," so to speak, but our working class parents sacrificed to send us to good schools, and we both have graduate degrees from Ivies. Personally, I would care more about what a person does with her life than if she grew up poor (or course, I'm biased). I have bright, talented classmates who with their trust funds are basically doing nothing with their lives.

I wouldn't necessarily mind if someone grew up poor, it's what they have done with their life that I find important. If my DD brought home someone "from the wrong side of the tracks" who worked at a going nowhere type of job and had no plans or desires/ambitions to do anything better, I would be concerned. Especially if said person had little education and had a history of job jumping. My grandfather was a steel worker in Chicago and my grandmother cleaned people's houses in the Gold Coast (wealthy area-can you tell?), yet they scrimped enough to send my dad to a private high school so he could get a leg up in going to college, which he did, and now he has a masters degree and has taught at the University level. It's not about where you come from, but where you go.

[Anonymous]

I get a real kick out of all the PPs who are proudly proclaiming that they are totally open-minded about who their children date or marry someday... unless it's someone who's not Christian, is too Christian, or is from a poor family, or is ... god forbid, a Republican! Such hypocrisy!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get a real kick out of all the PPs who are proudly proclaiming that they are totally open-minded about who their children date or marry someday... unless it's someone who's not Christian, is too Christian, or is from a poor family, or is ... god forbid, a Republican! Such hypocrisy!

This particular thread is about race. I think there are things that separate people more than race and those thing are religion, socioeconomic background and political beliefs. I have no problem with my child dating/marrying someone of a different race or ethnicity but *might* if that person was extremely religious or conservative because that person would not share our values. Of course, I wouldn't have a problem with them if they kept their beliefs to themselves. As soon as it starts to affect my child and grandchildren in a negative way, THEN I have a problem. I don't think this is hypocritical. Everyone hopes that there children will end up in good, healthy relationships with someone who shares their core values. This is the same for religious and no religious people, conservative or not. It's just the way we are.